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feeling so ashamed today

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happ162340
51
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 07 January 2014 - 08:10
Joyce, really made me smile reading this, what a lovely start to the new year!So happy for you both. We've all been there...!!
JoyceB11624
1236
Posts
EW OLDHAND
Latest post on 07 January 2014 - 02:25
Joyce we all have our moments, we arent perfect, dont be beating yourself up.My hubby needs a medal to put up with me. Aw thank you x As others have said, it is (almost) history and DH has never mentioned it again which is his way. He doesn't drone on about things. In fact, on Saturday night I made a chilli for dinner and he wandered into the kitchen and said "we having red then?" and proceeded to open a bottle of red wine. I just looked at him as if he was mad and asked if he trusted me with alcohol. He came over, cupped my face in his hands, kissed my nose and said "you had a wobbler, it's history, now lets get this food on the table, I'm starving!" That was me in floods again! What a wonderful man my DH is, bless him! I don't deserve him. x
salsB
2725
Posts
EW EXPERT
Latest post on 07 January 2014 - 01:55
Joyce we all have our moments, we arent perfect, dont be beating yourself up.My hubby needs a medal to put up with me.
JoyceB11624
1236
Posts
EW OLDHAND
Latest post on 03 January 2014 - 04:08
Oh Joyce - don't beat yourself up about this. There are MUCH MUCH worse things in the world. You had a few drinks too many and said and did things that are totally out of character. And that's the whole point - totally out of character. I'm sure you feel a lot worse about this than your husband. And I think he was a bit harsh in calling you a lush and saying you were embarrassing and absolutely wrong to lock you out. Where did he expect you to go? You will be feeling far worse about this than your friends - they probably found it quite amusing. I know if any of my friends get drunk, I always think nothing of it, just 'well it could have been me!' I once got really boozy at a friend's leaving party, went upstaris, threw up in the bathroom, fell asleep on her daughter's bunk bed for a couple of hours and then came down and re-joined the party. Next day I was MORTIFIED at my behaviour, but they thought it was hilarious, and it has gone down in the annals of 'what Lulu did next'. Any of us who follow your posts on this site know how much you love your hubbie and how great a couple you are. I think in a few days time you'll be able to laugh about this and you'll always remember your rocky, drunken start to 2014. Chalk it up to experience and your Scottish genes. edited by lulubaker on 03/01/2014 Lulu, although hubby locked the door on me, he was apparently watching me from the bedroom window to make sure that I didn't wander off out of sight. He was angry, worried about me and hurt. He had also consumed a few drinks but was nowhere near as inebriated as I was. We live in a cul de sac in a quiet area and he saw our neighbour taking me by the elbow so knew I was safe. He was on the verge of coming round to collect me when I returned to our house. I usually just throw up or get "maudlin" if I have had 1 too many but this is the first time I have done anything like this. He was embarrassed as I was yelling my head off in our quiet street well after midnight and knocked our wheelie bin over in temper. Our friends didn't witness my stupid tantrum as I only kicked off as we turned into our drive. Anyhow, we are both fine now and have spent the day quietly. I thank you for your understanding. Guess who is having a dry weekend!! x
lulubaker
309
Posts
EW EXPLORER
Latest post on 03 January 2014 - 01:07
Oh Joyce - don't beat yourself up about this. There are MUCH MUCH worse things in the world. You had a few drinks too many and said and did things that are totally out of character. And that's the whole point - totally out of character. I'm sure you feel a lot worse about this than your husband. And I think he was a bit harsh in calling you a lush and saying you were embarrassing and absolutely wrong to lock you out. Where did he expect you to go? You will be feeling far worse about this than your friends - they probably found it quite amusing. I know if any of my friends get drunk, I always think nothing of it, just 'well it could have been me!' I once got really boozy at a friend's leaving party, went upstaris, threw up in the bathroom, fell asleep on her daughter's bunk bed for a couple of hours and then came down and re-joined the party. Next day I was MORTIFIED at my behaviour, but they thought it was hilarious, and it has gone down in the annals of 'what Lulu did next'. Any of us who follow your posts on this site know how much you love your hubbie and how great a couple you are. I think in a few days time you'll be able to laugh about this and you'll always remember your rocky, drunken start to 2014. Chalk it up to experience and your Scottish genes. <em>edited by lulubaker on 03/01/2014</em>
JoyceB11624
1236
Posts
EW OLDHAND
Latest post on 02 January 2014 - 20:36
Thank you ladies for being so kind and understanding. DH and I are OK, just shattered and emotionally drained. Unfortunately I can remember things I said and my language was colourful too which is just not like me. I called him boring, pathetic etc which is just not true. DH is currently sound asleep on the couch and we have had lots of cuddles during today. My lovely neighbour sent me a PM on FB to check if I was OK. I had messaged her this morning to apologise and will go and see her tomorrow with some flowers. I feel rotten today in every way and it serves me right! DH and I are having a day out tomorrow to clear our heads, have lunch and maybe go to the cinema. I am indeed blessed to have such a wonderful DH who is the strong silent type who enjoys the simple things in life. A lesser man would have shown me the door or even lifted his hand. Your kind posts have had me in tears yet again but thank you. x <em>edited by JoyceB on 02/01/2014</em>
jdcgl70734
95
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 02 January 2014 - 20:30
Hi JoyceB, I think that you are very brave for talking about how you are feeling. I have been on the other side and it is hard and I am sure that he is feeling bad about the way that he reacted. Its easier to talk these things through when all parties are sober. Just make sure that ye talk a lot and cry and laugh and ye will find a way through it. All the best, J x
Nomad
1601
Posts
EW EXPERT
Latest post on 02 January 2014 - 19:40
Hi JoyceB firstly a great big hug....... You have taken the first very big step.....identifying what you did and seeing your lapse for what it was. The two of you have a good number of years under your belt, this is just a bump on the road. Having grown up with many a drunk in the family I would always feel so sorry for them when they sobered up and realized what had happened,but then they would just turn around and do it again. It had a profound effect on me as I vowed I would never drink to the point of not remembering what went on.This sounds daft to most but I have only ever been motherless once in my life,as a result I was violently ill and never did it again ( tried to drown my sorrows :,( ...) Be kind to yourself and your DH,from all your posts it is obvious that you love each other just be cautious in the future about mixing drinks and stopping before you have had too much. All the very best for the New Year.:)
fhasnat
49
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 02 January 2014 - 18:43
JoyceB I am Muslim and am not at all appalled by this. We all make mistakes, and the best among us are the ones who learn from our mistakes and vow never to repeat them. Think of this as a learning experience, and don't beat yourself up. You are very fortunate to have a husband who is so kind and understanding, and in a short amount of time this will be history.
carolsinger
20
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 02 January 2014 - 18:22
Aww Joyce, don't fret over this incident, in a few days/week it will have died down. Can you remember everything you said?. I would plead ignorance and say it was the drink talking and you can't remember everything you said. My mother was a Special Brew drinker and she sometimes drank gin as well. After gin she was the worst person ever, the things she said would make your hair curl and she cried buckets afterwards. We knew what was coming and my Dad always made a speedy exit, but after a few days it was forgotten. A bit of an odd start to the new year for you, but I'm sure you and your husband will laugh about it soon after the shock has died down.. <em>edited by carolsinger on 02/01/2014</em>
JoyceB11624
1236
Posts
EW OLDHAND
Latest post on 02 January 2014 - 17:13
So, am sitting here feeling absolutely disgusted with myself after something that happened last night. We had dinner with friends and am afraid I had far too much to drink and mixed them too. We walked home and during the 15 minute walk down hill to our house, DH quite rightly ticked me off for drinking too much. Something in me snapped and I went berserk, yelling abuse at him. We arrived at our house and he went inside ahead of me saying that I was a lush and that he was ashamed of me. (rightly deserved) I turned on my heel and walked back up the drive and DH locked the door! Dear knows where I thought I was going. Our next door neighbour heard me yelling and took me into their home where I sat and cried hysterically for about half an hour or so. They gave me some hot tea and walked me back round to our house to see if DH had relented. He had, and was standing looking out of the kitchen door. To cut an even longer story short, he said "we'll talk in the morning" and we went to bed. My DH is the gentlest mild mannered man and I feel so awful for hurting him like this. I'm sure that the Muslim ladies on here will be appalled at a woman getting drunk. My poor DH is a wreck today. I have apologised and we have both cried but I can see that my outburst has shaken him to the core. I said some terrible things. I do have a temper but have never done anything like this before. Sorry for the rant but just had to get this off my chest. There's no way that I could discuss this with any family member or close friend. I couldn't deal with their reaction. Thanks for listening. :(
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