Problem with spending money

I've spent a fortune over the last two weeks on dental check-ups for the family, opticians, mole checks and removals and I'm still not finished with the immunisations and gyny. Life is expensive enough without the fancy luxuries.

Thank You ladies ! I feel better n. Yes I am happy the way I am, only when friend & family call me stingy or old fashioned, I feel weird. I will definitely ignore these small things now. And good for you. Health and family..that is what money is for. Trivial branded items don't mean all that much in the end. I just thumbed this down by mistake by the way, sorry. I liked it :)

I read the Ops post and i thought the OP's qualities sound like really good and sound ones. We all spend our money in different ways according to our values but too many people get caught up in the idea that you have to do what everyone else does, like have a brand new huge car, go shopping, expensive meals etc. I think it has a lot to do with the people you like to hang out with. It's hard to find others with similar budgets and lifestyle choices as ourselves. We often mingle with people a little different (in many good ways) from people we know from our previous lives back home or overseas. I think, as with most things, balance is a good thing. A little bit of what you fancy does you good. Moderation being the best way. Dubai living can turn on a sixpence. So much can go wrong very quickly with jobs etc, and I can see the sense behind not buying a lot of expensive stuff for the house, when you might have to move again soon, for example. People must think I am mad because I do almost everything using Entertainer vouchers or cobones or special offers, and still manage some nice treats with the family without going beyond our means. We're trying to save for the future but it is hard work and sometimes we have quiet weekends and enjoy being at home, socialise with friends at our house or theirs, simple pleasures. We enjoy being outside once the weather is cooler, enjoying less expensive fun in the parks or beach etc. Dubai can be good for that kind of thing. We bought a 10 year old car instead of a new one to avoid bank loans. We don't buy clothes here unless it's urgent/specific. We run one car only. We live in a house that's older style and the rent has remained stable and we have the space we need in a good location but it's not a flashy community or penthouse, and it's never going to win any design awards. however, we love to travel as a family so we do tend to spend a little extra on our holidays - carefully planned, researched, compared and checked again to make sure we get good deals (not using the bigger airlines and not going direct saves us loads) and we don't go 5 stars, and we do a lot of research before we go. It gives us a lot of pleasure and experiences and family time which we really value. I figure if you're happy, don't let other people make unfair comparisons or make you question your own values. I can definitely learn a thing or two from your conscientious approach to spending. things are just things after all. A brunch - although lovely every now and again - is over in a few hours, so spending 500 does seem extravagant. It's much better to live within our means and make (sometimes unpopular) choices about how we choose to spend our money. And I think rather than being judgemental, perhaps the people who say things to you are actually envious... I know I am!

I get it, OP. I come from a very frugal family, of modest means, and I think it affects my feelings toward spending money. I triple think it, especially on consumables. That said, I do get 3-4 mani/pedis a month, and this took a long time to adapt to. It is about personal branding and appearance for me, and part of my professional life--not a matter of needless extravagance. In fact, I can't stand sitting there, I dread going. I recently mentioned it to my mother, as I was going to be late for my appointment, and her reaction was "Well la-di-dah!" I wanted to tell her I go on half price days, but I figured I would let her stew in her disapproval.

I have the opposite problem, I really enjoy spending money lol! But seriously, if you are inherently a minimalist and it isn't that you have any problems with self value etc then be happy with it, and put your money to more noble uses. To me "stingy" or "cheap" is when you are happy for other people to spend their money on you and then do your best not to reciprocate, which is entirely different to what you describe.

Nothing wrong with enjoying life and being satisfied without, brunches, designer clothes and spa treatments, there really are more important things in life. And some of your friends might be a bit jealous that you are not blowing your budget every month, like some might do. What worries me is that you say -I don't feel happy spending on myself. May be I should have said,"I don't feel happy spending money on my self this way (brunches, salon trips etc). Jealous, yes they may be :-p because I am more stable finance wise and I don't whine about credit card bills or bank loans :-P. I am just like you, hate spending money on brunches and salons and things, but what I hate even more is having to bail out my family and friends regularly because they have spent their money on frivolous things ...

I don't think it's unusual to prefer to spend your money on others, especially children..We don't brunch every week or wear designer stuff and I've never been to a salon here apart from to have my hair done...

Thank You ladies ! I feel better n. Yes I am happy the way I am, only when friend & family call me stingy or old fashioned, I feel weird. I will definitely ignore these small things now. And good for you. Health and family..that is what money is for. Trivial branded items don't mean all that much in the end.

It's no problem, i'm sure there are many on here who could help you spend your money!!

Maybe you are like me and cannot actually find things to buy in Dubai. My suitcases go home empty packed inside each other and come back absolutely heaving with all the shopping I've managed to do back home! I don't like shopping here as I can walk around a mall for hours and not find a single thing I like.

If you are happy with yourself, there is no problem. If, however, you are not happy, then it suggest you get a trusted friend to give you a mini makeover - hair, makeup, outfit, shoes etc. It may let you glimpse another side of you that you may like. Spending is difficult sometimes, especially here, where the mid range items are not that many and you either have to go low or high end. Also the current political-economic climate generally is not conducive to wild spending knowing there will be a tomorrow. Good for you being a good saver. I also try to save. I tend to spend on my kids but not on myself. I am worried about what is happening. The near east is my adopted home and it is becoming more and more unstable. Don't let people dictate to you how you should live. Be cautious and live your life your way. This is my motto.