Valentine’s Day is here and to the average couple this means a day of all things love, hearts, flowers and chocolates
14 February 2019| Last updated on 14 February 2019
However, Valentine’s Day can bring up anxiety and a sense of loss in couples struggling with infertility.
The stress of medical procedures and rising expenses can diminish affection, actually eroding the love between partners.
So what’s a couple got to do? Whatever you may be feeling, it is important to remember to work on your relationship with your partner to keep the love alive.
Here are some tips to enjoy Valentine’s Day:
1. Make a date
Avoid places that will cause you emotional pain or distress, like going to dinner at a family restaurant where there might be young children, so stay home to cook a gourmet meal, and dine by candlelight or take a walk in the park.
2. Don’t talk about infertility
Give yourself and your partner a break and spend some time focusing on “us” instead of focusing on your trouble conceiving. You’ve probably been worrying about your fertility treatment, talking about it, and obsessing over what’s going to happen.
Drop it for one night and try to have a little fun. On Valentine’s Day, shift the topics to things about each other, what attracted you to one another, and what you appreciate about your partner.
3. Nurture your mind and soul
Realize there is more to you than becoming a parent. Have you always wanted to explore a new hobby, such as yoga or a cooking class? Focus on your strengths or special skills, as well as the time and resources you have now that you might not have once you become a parent.
4. Movie Night
Of course, is another way to bring a couple close on the sofa and perhaps ignite a Valentine’s Day spark! Looking for romantic movies to help set the mood?
5. Invite friends over for a game
Sometimes a night out with friends where everyone brings potluck can result in just what the doctor ordered - laughter!
6. Try the little things
Write a sweet love letter or note and secretly put it in your partner’s purse or briefcase so he can find it later or send beautiful flowers ‘just because.’ You don’t have to wait for a holiday to give your partner flowers and let him know how much you love and appreciate him.
Remember, you are not alone. Though no amount of candy, flowers or jewelry can compare to the ultimate gift of having a baby, infertility doesn’t have to zap Cupid’s arrow. With some planning and creativity, you can make this Valentine’s Day one you will look back on fondly.