Shaking with fury...

The OP has made it clear that she is only happy with responses that are in agreement with her. I don't know her nationality, but I do know that she managed to misunderstand many of the posts in this thread. Perhaps it is a typical trait for those from her nation. As I said before, where I come from, what my nationality is and where I was educated will all bring you different answers, so in some cases it is a fruitless question. I still ask it though, and it is my right. My reasons are my own and if you are offering a service then it should not bother you.

OP, while this behaviour may be racist/annoying/offensive, I really don't know why it surprises you. Given that all over Dubai there are job adverts for specific nationalities, and many people requesting things like housemaids only of a certain nationality. I am not saying at all that it is right, but it is the norm here. Dubai is just a racist place and political correctness? Forget it. Also, we do not live in a cultural vacuum. Aspects of a person are indeed a reflection of the environment in which they were raised. While generalisations are grossly unfair on the significant number who do not fall neatly into stereotypes, it would be naive to say that generalisations are never accurate. Like a lot of ladies, I prefer Filipinos for nails here, Vietnamese when in London. Hair I don't care, but I prefer male hairdressers. Doctors I don't care, but for gynae I really would want a Western female (but of any ethnicity). If that makes me sexist, so be it... I get asked my nationality all the time, including by clients and when I give it I get a lot of additional questions as I don't particularly look like I'm from my country of origin. I've even (on more than one occasion) been accused of lying about where I'm from because I don't look that "western" Now, I am not suggesting that we should blindly follow the status quo, particularly when the status quo is entrenched racism. But when you're dealing with potential clients may not be the time, unless you're getting enough requests that you don't need their business

Where the person is from does not matter to me, it is where they were trained that matters. /2014 However to many companies/people, it is "where" the person is from that matters more than training. That is why you often hear "where is she from" more than "where was she trained" But for most where from is the same place as where you are educated.... Most Brits are educated in the UK for example.

@OP Its very common here. I also ask/consider about natioinality not because I don't like them. Knowing nationality helps me to have ideas how good they will be in their work. For example for my nails I prefer Filpoino technician (they are generally excellent in Mani/pedi). For waxing/threading I prefer Indian or Pakistani. And for hair I prefer British etc. Many of my clients also ask about my nationality and I always tell them. If I am confident about my work it should not matter to me. I am what I am. Take it or leave it. Just don't stress your self. Trust me there are good people too. Ignore negative ones and focus on growing your business. ?

Where the person is from does not matter to me, it is where they were trained that matters. /2014 However to many companies/people, it is "where" the person is from that matters more than training. That is why you often hear "where is she from" more than "where was she trained"

Woaha....Yes. That's even more annoying. It also happened with me. And I gave up on looking for maid. Its plain sick to deal with anyone who generalizes people. BTW....now when someone asks me such question, I intentionally laugh and say : "well, I am from your country, is it bad????" Sorry Lilly111 I think you misinterpreted my reply, I don't let it annoy me it's just a question! I wanted you to relax about the situation not add fuel to the fire!!! Well good luck with your situation hope all works out.

Go Irooni!!!!!!

Just wondering.... If you were the receptionist at a medical clinic, and when calling to make an appointment for the first time, I asked you where the doctor's qualifications were from, and what their approximate age was, would you be offended at that too? I am not the receptionist.But certinaly I will call you a racist if after making appointment you call it off. Because You found that Doctor was some Indian, regardless of his experience and qualification. Even if You reject him because of his age. He might be more qualified and experienced than older doctors. Never judge a book by its title. edited by lilly111 on 19/04/2014 I never said you were the receptionist, I said "if you were". I didn't say anything about where the doctor is form, it was about where the QUALIFICATIONS are from. If I go to a clinic where one doctor is a 27 year old with qualifications from Cambodia(!) and one doctor is a 52 year old with qualifications from England, you can bet money I will go with the latter! No it is not racist, the one with the qualifications from Cambodia could be from England and one with the English qualifications could be from Burkina Faso! Where the person is from does not matter to me, it is where they were trained that matters. Which is why the boards, posters and cards read, British qualified, German qualified, American board member ...... Because it makes a world of difference and I don't care if it is not politically correct!! <em>edited by Irooni on 19/04/2014</em>

Lilly111, I put an ad on-line looking for a new house maid and the first question I was asked when they called me was "what is your nationality madam?". Don't get so annoyed about it, let it go, it is like a lot of things here if you let it in, it could eat you up! Let go and let God at the end of day we are all trying to do our best here away from family and all we've known as normal to experience a different view point. At this stage you are probably expecting people to ask and can see it coming, try to expect a different response or try to response differently you may be surprised. When I come across an experience I don't like I ask myself 'how did I attract that?' We are all responsible to how we treat people and at the end of the day our treatment of others good or bad come back to us.Take it on the chin girl, don't bring a word like racist into it as I think that word goes beyond and is rooted in deep hatred which regardless of all the ways here I don't believe racism comes into it. Be the change you want to see, not easy but I have to remind myself of this every day:)

Outside of the UAE asking for someone's nationality is borderline racist and I believe we would not publicly acknowledge or justify this in anyway - outside of the UAE. We as a society in the UAE are racist, we stereotype in public and behind closed doors. We come in clean, then suddenly we are tainted. OP you have every right to be upset by it. Unfortunately being viewed as a native English speaker may not be reflected in your written English - for those who claim superiority based on their mother-tongue. I believe written English is a different ball game. I learnt that the hard way. We had a Social Media role to fill and we hired a British girl initially - it didn't work out, her English was very poor. We then switched to an American girl and had the same experience. Both had wonderful personalities, accomplished Degrees but their grammar was atrocious. I try my level best not to judge a person by their passport. Instead by their qualifications and what the role may require. We all play a role in this nationality, passport thing. Try to be fair and view someone based on their qualifications and not their passport.

Just wondering.... If you were the receptionist at a medical clinic, and when calling to make an appointment for the first time, I asked you where the doctor's qualifications were from, and what their approximate age was, would you be offended at that too? I am not the receptionist.But certinaly I will call you a racist if after making appointment you call it off. Because You found that Doctor was some Indian, regardless of his experience and qualification. Even if You reject him because of his age. He might be more qualified and experienced than older doctors. Never judge a book by its title. edited by lilly111 on 19/04/2014 Actually Drs over a certain age are probably not as up on modern discoveries as younger Drs and of course where the Dr qualified from is relevant.... would your rather be treated by someone who did the residency at John Hopkins or at RAK general? Absolutely nothing racist about that - unless of course you are looking for it.

The main (wrong) assumption that people make when categorizing a person's job ability on the basis of their "nationality" is that every one from that country has similar skills/abilities/attitude, which is a ridiculous belief to have in this current world. If you talk about Indians and Hinglish, there are quite a few Indians who speak perfect English without any tinge of Hinglish because they went to certain private schools in India or because they spent many years in the West, and such people often have more decipherable neutral accents that certain "native English speakers". And then you have Indians who went to other local places and who use the full "do the needful/ what is your good name/tell me" package. You cannot put both of them in the same boat just because they have the same blue passport. I recently met a friend who spent 6 months on an assignment here (had a degree from LSE and worked some time in the Financial District) and she wast from a country which has quite a few people here in blue collar positions. During her 6 months here, she was told 3/4 times, by people with innocent expressions, that they did not believe she was from her country , as people from that country are supposed to be maids/cleaners/waiters and not work as bankers. This is stereotyping taken to a whole new level.

I am equally offended by questions about nationality. To me it is just not relevant. But as with many issues here in Dubai... it is often cultural. As a rule, westerners (esp English speakers) seem to find this sort of enquiry inappropriate. But others (e.g. ppl from the middle east and south asia) are not offended at all. I apologise for the generalization - it's just a trend I have noticed. I have heard from friends working in schools that parents from these backgrounds have even been known to complain to mgt if their child is not being taught by a teacher of the 'right' nationality or even ethnic background. Incredible! Some would even rather have a less qualified person from background X than more qualified one from background Y. I guess that for some ppl it's just an 'easy' box to tick when they don't really understand the ins and outs of the services being offered... shame though for very competent staff from 'wrong' backgrounds :-(

Sad fact is: many of us hire based on the skill set of the potential applicant and I know that alarm bells -- for me, at least -- do tingle faintly when certain nationalities apply for positions for which they are essentially unsuited. I am, for my sins, more likely to look more closely at those for whom English is a second language when my priority is employing someone with A+ British English because there are certain requirements for some positions which simply cannot suit some people, irrespective of their list of degrees and work experience. I learned the hard way when a technical writer from a certain populous nation peppered his phrases with 'Hinglish' phrases and spellings that may have made perfect sense to him and his compatriots, but would have put off potential clients due to what *they* would see as elementary errors. This writer had already had his work amended by a qualified English editor but he changed everything BACK to his original phrasing because he thought it was 'better' ... which resulted in eight hours of extra re-editing time, putting the project proposal in jeopardy. Had the clients been Indian and familiar with the phrases this writer used, then in all likelihood, he would have been perfect for the job. But the clients were a split of Emirati and British directors and they would have viewed the proposal as an insult in many respects ... and they would have wondered whether we could address the project itself with the professionalism they believed it deserved. That's just my story though. And the above incident has no doubt coloured my opinion of the ability of ESL speakers to cope with a particular role and as a result, I am more wary. But one would -- surely -- sooner employ a medical doctor from a recognised school than an enthusiastic naturopath so I stand by my choices. Some employers are looking for certain things and some nationalities or rather, people -- irrespective of their nationality -- cannot make the grade according to the requirements demanded by the job and the company doing the hiring. I'd never be rude about it though. And I always ALWAYS give people actual feedback as to why they were not successful for a role. Because you're [insert nationality here'> is NOT a reason. Because you don't fulfill our requirements in *these* areas IS a reason.

At my business, we get asked about nationality often, normally the desk is instructed to be as transparent, so the nationality is given away. Every now and then if i happen to answer the phone, then i do question, "why is that important?", etc. Normally, we lose the business of that call, as i eventually lecture, that no nationality can be stereotyped. What really matters is the quality of education, how one was raised and the individual standards that matter. Of course, we lose a lot of business when i answer the phone....hence i'm banned from phones!

Am I the only one who read the title and thought this was TDB's wedding post revived? It DID ring a bell, and now I know why. Good memory Kiwispiers.

Well I am not doing an office job. And we are providing technical services. So it would sound stupid to me if someone is bothered about my English or nationality of my Carpenters. All that matters in such jobs is how well job is done and the charges. Rest honesty, professionalism and customer service has nothing to do with nationality. Probably humanity/manners is the last thing people care in this part of word. Certain nationalities are perceived as being better tradesmen than others e.g. one of the biggest and most sought after compound groups in Saudi hire only guys from the Philippines. The reason I give this example is I used to live there for many years and they WERE great carpenters etc. My experience with "other tradesmen" here is not that - sometimes this stems from their lack of language but also they come from an initial starting point that I am a woman and so the reason that something isn't working is because I don't know how to push the start button!!

Well then don't do business with them and don't work with them. And I would definitely not let it bother me to the extent that I am shaking with fury. Not worth it. Other than that I don't know what you want to achieve by posting it here. edited by Marroosh on 17/04/2014 To be able to know if its normal to feel bad or I am over reacting. Anyway thank you for your time. It's par for the course here - not saying it is right - just saying...... there are e.g. maintenance vans driving all over saying things like " British standard maintenance" - in fact saw one just the other day saying " German standards" ...

Am I the only one who read the title and thought this was TDB's wedding post revived? No, I also thought that.

Am I the only one who read the title and thought this was TDB's wedding post revived?

I don't understand why anybody, anywhere, in any context should feel it's acceptable to ask a person's nationality... When you meet someone socially it's ok to say "where are you from" in a conversational way but that's all... in my opinion.

Just wondering.... If you were the receptionist at a medical clinic, and when calling to make an appointment for the first time, I asked you where the doctor's qualifications were from, and what their approximate age was, would you be offended at that too?

Don't take it personally.....it is indeed bad manners to come out and ask what nationality a person is in this context but don't stoop to their level. English is my first language however I have a smattering of others and I know what it is like when someone belittles my attempts .I remind myself it is their problem not mine... Hold on to the fact that you represent a well run business and you do your job well....that's all that matters in the end.

In business world, to be in the position of negotiating about the cost and accepting offers, it's important to understand the person you are negotiating with, its called business negotiating skills. What those clients are doing is not negotiating it's stereotyping, out of the blue pop a personal question like that, so they *think* they are going to win you or understand what bases you are, these people don't have the skills to do the negotiating, they just being smart areses! I understand your frustration from the question been dropped like a slap on the face, just ignore the question and move forward with your presentation or business plan, if this ignorant kept asking it, just tell him you are doing business here and not getting acquainted with him/her. If the question about the nationality of the staff kept piping up, simply show that your company is conducting training to ensure that all staff are equally qualified to do the task. Being in customer service makes [u'>some people[/u'> *think* they owned this or that customer service employee, they can make him/her lower than them, make fun of them, or even show off on them, you will find some will try to make you make mistakes to hold it on you, so they can get more what they pay for from the company you are working for. you have every right to feel angry, but dealing with this type of smart arses clients need experience and training, and more of this patience from your side, after all the moment you sign off from work, you left these clients in the office, don't get them with you to your home, you need to separate what happen at work as not personal insult - I know it's personal - but you need to separate it, so you can live your life away from the office. HTH