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DS has taken a dislike to maid

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90

Posts

EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 26 April 2015 - 14:15

Honestly speaking, I would rather be safe than sorry. Your sons blatent distain for her may have resulted from something that happened when you were not around. I would get a nanny cam as soon as I could just to be on the safe side. Then, if you find out that there is no issue and your son is just being, well, a 2 year old, you can deal with it from that angle with peace of mind.

685

Posts

EW GURU

Latest post on 26 April 2015 - 08:55

It's possible that she has said something to upset him, something clearly has happened for him to say no to her. A friends maid shouted at her 3 year old out of concern that she would go near the cleaning materials (maid shouldn't have left them out in the open) but the little girl was upset about it for days and called the maid a monster.

1575

Posts

EW EXPERT

Latest post on 23 April 2015 - 12:15

Trust your son's instincts! Don't you think it's strange he liked her at first but now this has changed. Something may have happened and how well do you know your maid really? As for asking your son to kiss the maid! I can't believe anyone would think this was appropriate. Do YOU want to kiss her every morning and night? I think not - so why would you even want your child to. I agree with previous posts regarding it sending your child the wrong signals and setting a bad example in how you should act with strangers. Also, I don't think you can ever be paranoid when it comes to your children's safety - I would observe carefully before leaving him alone again. I agree.

Scotsgirl123105602

51

Posts

EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 23 April 2015 - 12:11

Trust your son's instincts! Don't you think it's strange he liked her at first but now this has changed. Something may have happened and how well do you know your maid really? As for asking your son to kiss the maid! I can't believe anyone would think this was appropriate. Do YOU want to kiss her every morning and night? I think not - so why would you even want your child to. I agree with previous posts regarding it sending your child the wrong signals and setting a bad example in how you should act with strangers. Also, I don't think you can ever be paranoid when it comes to your children's safety - I would observe carefully before leaving him alone again.

186

Posts

EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 23 April 2015 - 09:52

TTucker i think it may be a phase too- just observe and keep an eye... we had a maid when my DS was born she left when he was 18 months and with our new maid it took him a while to go to her if we were in the house. he is now 3 and adores her... every family is different on how they have their maids within their family... im like you and treat her like part of the family however she knows that she is an employee... at the end of the day when he is her without you there he needs to like her, feel safe and knows who is in charge...

2738

Posts

EW EXPERT

Latest post on 23 April 2015 - 09:14

Whoah, I am not forcing my child to kiss our maid at all! Fair point from Daza that affection should come from the child, so yes, perhaps we shouldn't do that. Our DS is generally very kissy with people, it's one of the things he 'does'. My thinking behind it was to show him that our new maid is someone he CAN show affection to also, not SHOULD and I am not forcing the point on him at all. I ask DS to kiss our maid, I don't tell him. My fault for not being clearer in my explanation. It's also in context - so when we say Good Morning and when we say Good Night. My instinct tells me it is him asserting his independence as he is often fussy with people. I just wanted opinion and experience, which I received. Thank you. edited by TTucker on 23/04/2015 So now you teach your child to show affection to strangers (in his eyes that is what this maid is) and in a few years time you will be telling him not to, in order to protect him, as will his schools. I suggest you seriously rethink your parenting on this one. This is a maid not a family member, don't confuse the two nor confuse your child about affection and it's basis. YOU ASK your child to kiss the maid, that is the same as telling him to in his eyes, why? You think the maid cares? Your child is verbalising the word NO to you, why?

sourskittleashnut

984

Posts

EW GURU

Latest post on 23 April 2015 - 09:13

Give it some more time, maybe he's going through a phase. We had a lovely maid for a while and my then 2 year old DD loved her to bits. Suddenly she went through a 2 week phase of not wanting to go near her and would scream "no like no like" whenever the maid came near. It passed and she went back to hugging her every time she saw her. Since your maid is new, I would watch her closely though, but it could also be just a phase.

2738

Posts

EW EXPERT

Latest post on 23 April 2015 - 08:58

What on earth are you doing forcing a child to kiss a complete stranger and employee? Just think about it! This is a maid who is not part of your family she is an employee and should be treated with the respect that deserves. If your toddler does not want to go with her and is actually verbalising the word NO then this should ring very loud alarm bells. The employee is a maid not a nanny. Culture, upbringing and education are completely different to yours, you need to observe your maid and educate accordingly. Install some cameras and watch how your maid interacts with your child.

4062

Posts

EW MASTER

Latest post on 23 April 2015 - 08:50

I don't know if you are reading too much in to things or not. It may be that he is just asserting his independence to choose who is goes to or something may have upset him. My two year sometimes going through stages of being all about me and not wanting my husband to help him with anything and sometimes it's vice versa. It doesn't mean we've upset him, it's just him making his own decisions about things. Whatever the issue is, I certainly wouldn't be asking my toddler to kiss someone who has only been around for such a short time. I [i'>really[/i'> strongly believe that affection in this circumstance should be initiated by the child. When they are happy and comfortable they can choose to hug or kiss but they should never be told too. Just my two fils worth :)

225

Posts

EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 23 April 2015 - 08:36

No you are not reading too much into this. I am not sure what the answer is but follow your instincts to protect your child.

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