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mum2k
Posts 150



08/03/2012 00:51:01
I so strongly believe that certain people come into your life at certain times when you really need them. They fill some special need (as you probably do for them)...sometimes these relationships are permanent and sometimes they're not. Now I'm not the most outgoing person by far, but I've learned over the years that a place is just as good as the people who make it special, so I try to open up. So I try not to think that my friends might leave me behind when they move on...I just go with the flow and enjoy the time together for as long as it lasts. And I have plenty of friends all over the world that I keep in touch with...not the same as having them here but its so much easier to keep in touch with Skype and all the new technology....

Life goes on...


muurtje
Posts 993



07/03/2012 19:20:56
Sorry to hear that I am not the only one.... It won't stop me from investing in new friends as the short time I have had together with this friend has been worth it and I truly believe there are lots of lovely ladies out there that I have yet to befriend!

Thankfully I have a nice group of friends to hang out with on the weekend etc, but always have room for more friends!


elaine0411
Posts 11



07/03/2012 15:20:10
then maybe it's time to arrange a night out with a couple of drinks for anyone interested?? If you're up for it then happy for you to email me on elaine.reed@hotmail.co.uk and we can go from there. What's the worst that can happen??


Clairehdp
Posts 15263



07/03/2012 13:19:01
It is hard when a special friend leaves but if we all said we weren't prepared to make the effort any more like some are saying then it's going to make it even more difficult for others to make friends. You may well miss out on the bestest friend ever! I'm in a very happy place at the moment - lots of my Dubai friends have relocated and now I am back in the UK I'm seeing my old 'home; friends and now my old 'Dubai' friends too. More are coming back. I'm flying over there tonight for a girlie weekend with the special friends who are still in Dubai - I can't wait. As Elaine says, it takes effort to make friends and keep friends especially so when yuu are an expat but I have to say that it's very rewarding to have friends in so many different locations. I met up with friends who I used to work with 20 years ago and it was like we had never been away - 2 of us lived abroard for a long time and we are organising a big reunion which I know will take lots of organising but it will be soooooo worth it on the night!


elaine0411
Posts 11



07/03/2012 12:58:07
By effort, I mean taking time out to call, email to arrange going out - it's a two-way street but that's how friendship works. I've never been in this kind of situation before where I only go out with a couple of different individual friends now and then. The survival instinct is kicking in here but I still miss the reliability and the number of friendships close by that you enjoy at home.


izzabel19
Posts 7



07/03/2012 12:51:32
without freinnnds as wellll
but honestllly it s not eassy u really need freind


Green-ish
Posts 9415



07/03/2012 12:45:32
elaine0411 wrote:
it seems so very sad that to survive here we don't make the efforts we might do at home, to avoid the downside when friends leave. maybe I should get a cat!


Big Grin
The thing is, I don't ever remember it being an effort 'at home' before my expat stint. Since coming home, those original friendships are largely unchanged and still no 'effort' but finding new friends in a new area has been ten times harder than it ever was in Dubai. I'm lucky that I have found two like-minded women and the three of us just seem to fit together. I don't know what I'd do without them!
ETA: Last Christmas they both had the cheek to go away at the same time on extended family holidays. Here I was 'at home' and feeling like it was Dubai in the Summer. lol
edited by Green-ish on 07/03/2012


shirlann
Posts 64



07/03/2012 12:44:51
Good thing I do not have any friends then


Appletiser
Posts 7406



07/03/2012 12:43:23
nobody-in-particular wrote:
Its hard and yes friends here do matter a lot but eventually you become self sufficent.


Haha! Sounds like me. Ive stopped trying to make friends and just do my own thing. All my friends have moved away and I cant be bothered anymore. Kids keep me busy anyways.


elaine0411
Posts 11



07/03/2012 12:39:55
it seems so very sad that to survive here we don't make the efforts we might do at home, to avoid the downside when friends leave. maybe I should get a cat!


simpleasabc
Posts 7640



07/03/2012 12:36:07
That happened to me about 10 years ago in Geneva - I met a lovely Australian lady with whom I really "clicked", but she left to go back to Canberra a couple of months later. Since that disappointment, I haven't invested so much in making good friends as the feeling of loss when they leave is horrible.


elaine0411
Posts 11



07/03/2012 12:17:38
so pleased I'm not the only one! Only been here 18 months, and lost one really good friend to the UK in November and now another is leaving next month! I know I'll keep in touch but when they are there and you're still here it gets you down a bit. And let's face it, it's not always easy to make new friends on a continual basis. (sigh!)


AzaniaKhayaLam
Posts 667



07/03/2012 07:38:38
Faced with the possibility of not returning after these summer holidays and I thinking of the friendships I'll be leaving behind just crushes me inside.
I don't like this feeling, going to miss my friends


Green-ish
Posts 9415



07/03/2012 05:49:13
And take it from me, those of us who leave never forget the friends we leave behind. I miss my Dubai mates every day.

Hugs for you muurtje. xx


Sanddy_Dogg
Posts 9441



07/03/2012 05:42:31
I know how you feel. One of my lovely friends, who is also a neighbour, came yesterday to tell me she's leaving very soon


muurtje
Posts 993



07/03/2012 00:46:04
So a couple of months ago I met this wonderful women and she and I became friends very quickly. As is often the case in DXB she has to leave and go back home. We haven't know each other for very long but she is very dear to me and I really will miss her a LOT! Just realised this is one of the great downsides of expat life... We'll remain friends always it won't be the same.


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