Things You Only Know if You Don’t Like Dessert
No, you don’t want the dessert menu, thanks.
6 May 2019
All Credits: PA
Not everyone likes pudding. For some, this is an incredibly strange trait – how could you not want chocolate? What have you got against cake?
But for those in the know, this lot should make perfect sense…
The cheese board is a thing of beauty. Crackers, grapes, gooey, smelly cheeses – they beat your sticky toffee pudding hands down, every time.
Birthday cake is always dry. It doesn’t matter how much jam you sandwich in the middle.
When your friend/partner/sibling/parent suggests sharing a sundae or crème brûlée, all you want to do is dramatically order the cheque.
Yes, if much cajoled, you will deign to try a spoonful of your nan’s banoffee pie, but you know you’ll just have to hide your disappointment.
Even if you warn people in advance that you’re ‘not a sweet person’, people are STILL confused when you turn down tiramisu.
Dessert you’re not fussed by, but dessert wine? That you will consider.
There are still unopened boxes of chocolate and biscuits in your cupboard leftover from Christmas. You might just hold onto them until next year.
You don’t understand people who have to finish a packet of biscuits if they’ve opened it. One cookie is more than enough. Your tastebuds just start craving something savoury.
No sweet delight can compare with a packet of crisps. Even better if there’s dip.