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batgirls gal

batgirls gal
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Latest post on 09 June 2014 - 16:56
If you have a residency order in your favour you can take your child abroad for no more than 28 days without dad's permission. If there is no residency order in place technically you need written consent from dad (and likewise he would from you) in order to take the child out of the country, even for a holiday. In effect this is rarely a problem but be aware the dad could cause problems if he wished or you could be randomly stopped at immigration/passport control.
batgirls gal
170
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 29 May 2014 - 20:38
I'm not sure what advice you are hoping for? Without knowing specific work schedules what can anyone suggest? If you and your ex are in agreement that 50/50 is the ideal, then just agree to shared custody/residency and work out the specifics as you go?
batgirls gal
170
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EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 28 May 2014 - 22:04
I don't have experience specifically with pilots but I do have a lot of experience with trying to arrange suitable child residency arrangements generally. I would say, depending on the age of the children, that as much possible time with each parent is the ideal. For example if dad is working shifts of say 6 on 3 off and can have the kids all of his days off, then that is perfect. In my opinion kids are not bothered about days of the week, although others will disagree with this and I personally believe that even if the days the kids are with each parent changes each week as long as there is consistency and love in each home, then it's fine. I would also urge everyone involved to try and think about how they would feel in the other parents situation and if you would feel things were fair if the roles were reversed.
batgirls gal
170
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EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 28 May 2014 - 19:14
Just be pleasant and fair. Unless you live somewhere with no buses or metros within walking distance leave her to make her own way on her days off. We live quite far from public transport so I give her an extra 20dhs for her taxi on her days off. I give food allowance on top of her salary, I couldn't be bothered worrying about whether or not she likes what we're having and I find it much easier to just leave her to sort out her own food, saying that I will occasionally buy her extras (Nescafé coffee, fish, etc) but I didn't do it from the start and she certainly doesn't expect it. If she comes out with us we always get her food, I could never sit and eat without getting her anything. Even if she tried to say no, I would insist and tell her she could take what she doesn't want home to have later. I would also say if she does anything you don't like/don't want her to do, tell her straight away, it's much more awkward to try and change things 6 months down the line.
batgirls gal
170
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 27 May 2014 - 12:50
Are you seriously suggesting I put down a healthy dog against the advice of professionals? A dog you have never seen but dog trainers have? Trainers who fully understand the situation and do not feel she is a risk, in the right home. The 'bite' was not serious, did not break the skin and was from a scared animal who felt threatened. I won't be posting on this subject again, things are not always black and white.
batgirls gal
170
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 27 May 2014 - 11:04
My much loved 2 year old dog is one of those on the wait list to go back to k9. We adopted her approx 18months ago, have worked with her but her behavioural problems are too much and ended in her growling then biting my dd's 9 year old friend a few weeks ago. We have agonised with our decision but with 3 young kids we feel we have no choice. As it is we have no where to place her until a space comes up. Far from an ideal situation. if she bit a child, is getting her rehomed the best possible decision? Maybe this dog needs to be put to I honestly think she would be fine in a home without young children, her problems are mostly down to her being anxious, she's generally a very submissive dog, her issues are around food and this incident with my dd's friend involved food. I wouldn't take a dog that had bitten someone. It might be fine in a home without young children but if she gets out and attacks a neighbor's child, then I'd be in trouble. The responsible thing to do would be to put her down. Absolutely not. She is lovely, she just has some problems and our home is not the best place for her. She would not just attack a random child unless she felt threatened (like most dogs). So you want someone else to deal with your problem because you can't manage? You want someone to take the risk of a vicious biting dog because you don't want to take responsibility for it? Don't be ridiculous, k9 are aware of exactly what has happened and will aim to rehome her with a suitable couple or family with older children. Where did you get vicious from? She is sweet, submissive, timid and scared. She is a rescue dog, who has obviously been through some trauma. The staff at k9, myself and the independent dog trainer we have seen all feel the same, in the right home she will be fine.
batgirls gal
170
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 27 May 2014 - 10:54
My much loved 2 year old dog is one of those on the wait list to go back to k9. We adopted her approx 18months ago, have worked with her but her behavioural problems are too much and ended in her growling then biting my dd's 9 year old friend a few weeks ago. We have agonised with our decision but with 3 young kids we feel we have no choice. As it is we have no where to place her until a space comes up. Far from an ideal situation. if she bit a child, is getting her rehomed the best possible decision? Maybe this dog needs to be put to I honestly think she would be fine in a home without young children, her problems are mostly down to her being anxious, she's generally a very submissive dog, her issues are around food and this incident with my dd's friend involved food. I wouldn't take a dog that had bitten someone. It might be fine in a home without young children but if she gets out and attacks a neighbor's child, then I'd be in trouble. The responsible thing to do would be to put her down. Absolutely not. She is lovely, she just has some problems and our home is not the best place for her. She would not just attack a random child unless she felt threatened (like most dogs).
batgirls gal
170
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 27 May 2014 - 10:47
My much loved 2 year old dog is one of those on the wait list to go back to k9. We adopted her approx 18months ago, have worked with her but her behavioural problems are too much and ended in her growling then biting my dd's 9 year old friend a few weeks ago. We have agonised with our decision but with 3 young kids we feel we have no choice. As it is we have no where to place her until a space comes up. Far from an ideal situation. if she bit a child, is getting her rehomed the best possible decision? Maybe this dog needs to be put to sleep. I honestly think she would be fine in a home without young children, her problems are mostly down to her being anxious, she's generally a very submissive dog, her issues are around food and this incident with my dd's friend involved food.
batgirls gal
170
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 27 May 2014 - 10:42
My much loved 2 year old dog is one of those on the wait list to go back to k9. We adopted her approx 18months ago, have worked with her but her behavioural problems are too much and ended in her growling then biting my dd's 9 year old friend a few weeks ago. We have agonised with our decision but with 3 young kids we feel we have no choice. As it is we have no where to place her until a space comes up. Far from an ideal situation.
batgirls gal
170
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 08 May 2014 - 16:07
No, I've had to become quite green fingered since then, lol. Do you have one to recommend?
batgirls gal
170
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 08 May 2014 - 15:04
My 9 year old dd moved in Jan and I agree there is a much stronger emphasis on sport than at many other bc schools in Dubai, my dd is not sporty but I have encouraged her and she is now doing netball, etc. I would be encouraging plenty of play dates (I have found this has helped my dd settle in) personally I believe that by forming strong friendships outside of the school setting it will help enormously with break times, etc. My dd has also come across the whole 'you can't play with us, we have enough people' at play times, which make my blood boil!! The idea of my lovely little girl plucking up the courage to ask to join in and to be told no........ She has also had a child in her class make very unpleasant comments to her but it was dealt with swiftly be the teacher. Have you asked the teacher to assist in helping her settle in better?
batgirls gal
170
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 07 May 2014 - 16:34
I think someone's got confused somewhere though. They're pricing the tesco own brand stuff in line with branded products, the tesco own brand cornflakes are more expensive than Kellogg's, the tesco own brand rice pudding is more expensive than ambrosia, etc. Think someone needs to explain that tesco own brand stuff is not a premium product and is what people purchase when they're trying to cut back.
batgirls gal
170
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 06 May 2014 - 11:06
Thanks everyone, have had some tablets and feel a bit better.
batgirls gal
170
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 15 April 2014 - 23:30
If you have a uk HSBC account you can have any of their mortgage products, being an expat is fine as long as you are a british citizen.
batgirls gal
170
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 24 March 2014 - 16:53
Hiya Mrsg, do you mind me asking which area do you live in? There is a purpose to my question! :-)
batgirls gal
170
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 12 March 2014 - 16:38
If the parents have been to court and there is a residency order in favour of the mum, she is fine and can take the child out of the country for up to 4 weeks without the fathers permission. If they have been to court and have joint residency then the order should specify holiday arrangements in any case. If they have not been to court and both have parental responsibility (mum automatically has this, dad has it if they were married at the time of the child's birth or the child was born after 2005 and the dads name is on the birth certificate) then either parent needs written permission to take the child out of the country, this practice is rarely enforced but technically she could be refused permission to take the child on the plane if the dad phoned the airport and said he had not given permission. If necessary she can apply to her local court for a specifics issue order, no need for a solicitor and there should be no problem getting a judge to ok a holiday for a week or two. HTH
batgirls gal
170
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 03 March 2014 - 15:50
Thanks Geordie expat but no I feel I've exhauseted such options and we are now at a stage where we need to let her go.
batgirls gal
170
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 03 March 2014 - 14:20
We adopted a puppy just over a year ago from k9, she is lovely with dh and I but from very early on has had issues with the children (we have 3, aged 3, 4 and 9). She growls and bars her teeth at them several times a day and has occasionally gone to bite them. After trying different training techniques I have come to the conclusion we simply cant keep her. She really is a nice dog and I love her to bits but feel like Im being unfair to my children and waiting for the worst to happen before I act. I think she'd be a fabulous pet for a family with much older children or no children at all but am having no luck rehoming. Ive talked to k9 who say they do not have space for her. What should I do? Is there another organisation who could take er and try to rehome her?
batgirls gal
170
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 26 February 2014 - 09:15
I've done this lots of times, it's great fun and the advice already given is perfect, only thing I would add is to only buy medium grain sandpaper. Have fun.
batgirls gal
170
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 23 February 2014 - 09:47
So sorry to hear your daughter is not settling too well, my dd started Year 4 at DESS last month and is settling ok but is also finding that firm friendships are already in place. Is your dd in Year 4? If you'd like to maybe arrange a play date for them send me an email on darlogirl at outlook dot com.
batgirls gal
170
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 18 February 2014 - 11:01
To get an engineer out you call Dubai Municipality on 800900 and explain you need a Municipality engineer to visit the property, there was no charge. Tiamona my email is darlogirl at outlook dot com. Thank you and I hope everything falls (no pun) in place :) lol!
batgirls gal
170
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 18 February 2014 - 10:26
To get an engineer out you call Dubai Municipality on 800900 and explain you need a Municipality engineer to visit the property, there was no charge. Tiamona my email is darlogirl at outlook dot com.
batgirls gal
170
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 17 February 2014 - 19:55
Hi, yes we are all fine thanks, in a hotel, has been an absolute nightmare! Owner was adamant the villa was fine to still live in, after 2 days of arguing that clearly it was not 'fine' I arranged for a government engineer to visit today, he confirmed we should not be living there until they conduct proper tests and repair works are carried out. In real limbo at the moment.
batgirls gal
170
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 27 January 2014 - 12:10
Hi Ginee I do and your welcome to use my charger. One thing you could try tho is propping the phone up against a wall whilst the charger is plugged in, that's the only way mine will charge now. If that doesn't work put your email up and il send you a message to arrange to use mine.
batgirls gal
170
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 27 January 2014 - 09:56
Hi, hoping thats someone on here will have the neccessary legal knowledge to answer this question.... If my landlord offers a new contract based on the terms and conditions of the old one, does this include the number of cheques? If we are happy with the amount, but cant pay in a single cheque (as we have previously) where do we stand? As I understand it, the laws are supposed to be on the side of the tenant, and we want to renew, but just need to split the payment into more cheques (I'm talking four, or maybe two at a push.....not anything 'far-fetched' like twelve!!!! - although that would be great!!! :-) ) I believe it has to remain the same unless both parties agree. Have you asked the landlord if they would mind you increasing the number of cheques? If they say no perhaps you could look at a bank loan for the rent amount? I know HSBC offers very low rates if the loan is only over 1 year (around 1-2%) the interest would be nothing compared to the costs of moving.
batgirls gal
170
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 27 January 2014 - 09:44
There is a list that schools and nurseries have from the relevant ministries with guidelines as to how long pupils have to be off school. Schools have to adhere to this and certain communicable diseases have to be reported if found in pupils. A Google will find it or your nursery will be able to provide you with a copy of their health policy. Schools are really trying their best to protect their communities their problem is that a percentage of parents seem to know better or fail to report ill health. When my kids are sick and it is a questionable one i often pop in to the school doctor and ask her advice as to whether they want said child at school, because it is the responsible thing to do. The guidelines at dd's school are that once the spots have scabbed she can go back in, so even though she is still covered in them she can return. They have not asked eldest dd to stay off just in case she might get them. Seriously how many schools would refuse siblings because their brother or sister has it and they MIGHT be carrying it?? And where would it end, which other illnesses could the same policy be used for? Then you need to direct your questions with the schools directly and if still unhappy ask the appropriate ministry. The answer to you second part is because it is down to risk and a risk evaluation is done, if the risk is high enough action needs to be taken regardless of whether it might or might not happen. When people are quarantined it is based on risk not necessarily symptoms, it's to do with exposure bla bla. Not schools it's just the 1 nursery that I am aware of who has suddenly made up this policy. He attended yesterday and they phoned me after I picked him up to say they had just made up this new rule. I told them his sister had chicken pox last Monday and now 6 days later they've invented a new policy, that is not common practise in other nurseries or schools.
batgirls gal
170
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 27 January 2014 - 09:31
There is a list that schools and nurseries have from the relevant ministries with guidelines as to how long pupils have to be off school. Schools have to adhere to this and certain communicable diseases have to be reported if found in pupils. A Google will find it or your nursery will be able to provide you with a copy of their health policy. Schools are really trying their best to protect their communities their problem is that a percentage of parents seem to know better or fail to report ill health. When my kids are sick and it is a questionable one i often pop in to the school doctor and ask her advice as to whether they want said child at school, because it is the responsible thing to do. The guidelines at dd's school are that once the spots have scabbed she can go back in, so even though she is still covered in them she can return. They have not asked eldest dd to stay off just in case she might get them. Seriously how many schools would refuse siblings because their brother or sister has it and they MIGHT be carrying it?? And where would it end, which other illnesses could the same policy be used for?
batgirls gal
170
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EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 27 January 2014 - 09:23
I guess no one here went to 'pox' parties when they were kids? Got sent to several as a child and never managed to get it. Can see both sides of this one batgirls i hope the sick little one gets well soon and i hope you can manage with the other off nursery xx Pox parties still happen! And thank you x
batgirls gal
170
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EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 27 January 2014 - 09:19
Asking siblings to stay home feels like using a sledgehammer to crack a nut. Given that you can be infectious up to 10 days after onset of symptoms and incubation can be up to 21 days, if you want to be really socially responsible that would mean 31 days isolation. Do you really think people should isolate for 31 days just be on the safe side? In the past couple of years that would have meant 3 months off school for my one child who never contracted chicken pox despite is three siblings doing so. My husband hasn't had chicken pox either. As the majority of fatal cases are adults and he comes in to contact with far more adults during the course of his day than my children do, should he have taken 3 months off work? He'd be told to return or be fired. The serious consequences of road accidents far outweigh the serious consequences of chicken pox per capita. In order to be socially responsible should we then all decide not to use cars? Of course not. We minimise the risk through seat belts, airbags and taking care (some of us) and go about our lives hoping for the best. With chicken pox you can choose to minimise the risk through vaccinating your family and in the event of contracting it, staying home for the duration of the infectious period. They are being asked for a two week stay away, not three months, get this into perspective. Cars and communicable disease are incomparable. What daza is saying is that if you have say 4 children and one never actually gets chicken pox then he could potentially be about to get it for months if his siblings all catch it 21 days apart. Having my kids home is actually no hardship, I am well aware what being a mum is all about! What I take issue with is 1 nursery making up a rule that is unheard of in other schools/nurseries based on assumptions that the other children will become infected, which if they haven't been vaccinated is surely a good thing? I wanted my children to catch it whilst they were young enough for it to be a generally mild illness, surely all parents who have not vaccinated feel the same? Besides, which other illnesses are you suggesting we do the same for, a month ago my dd had a fever, a child in her class had scarlet fever, so we took dd to the docs, whilst waiting for the results should I have kept my other 2 children off school, who had no temperatures, just in case eldest dd had scarlet fever (she didn't) and they were in the incubation period? Every time one of my children has a fever should they all be off because it could turn into something else??
batgirls gal
170
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Latest post on 27 January 2014 - 09:00
Having had adult chickenpox last year along with my three daughters 3,5,9 I would definitely advocate getting it when you are a child. They had no fever just the rash and were bouncing all over the place while I was in a living ****. Chickenpox vaccine is not a mandatory vaccination and therefore it is not actively offered by the doctors. If you want it you need to ask for it (a lot of people dont know or dont bother asking). A lot of Dr.'s also advise against too many vaccines for children as with every bit of chemical you put in their body you are also taking something away from them. When I was younger I used to hear about chickenpox play dates i.e. parents used to send their kids for playdates with kids with chickenpox so they could get it over with....anyway, my two bits. We were advised not to have the vaccine both here and in the uk, most cases in children are mild and we were told unless there are underlying medical conditions a chicken pox vaccine was unneccessary.
batgirls gal
170
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 27 January 2014 - 08:53
Asking siblings to stay home feels like using a sledgehammer to crack a nut. Given that you can be infectious up to 10 days after onset of symptoms and incubation can be up to 21 days, if you want to be really socially responsible that would mean 31 days isolation. Do you really think people should isolate for 31 days just be on the safe side? In the past couple of years that would have meant 3 months off school for my one child who never contracted chicken pox despite is three siblings doing so. My husband hasn't had chicken pox either. As the majority of fatal cases are adults and he comes in to contact with far more adults during the course of his day than my children do, should he have taken 3 months off work? He'd be told to return or be fired. The serious consequences of road accidents far outweigh the serious consequences of chicken pox per capita. In order to be socially responsible should we then all decide not to use cars? Of course not. We minimise the risk through seat belts, airbags and taking care (some of us) and go about our lives hoping for the best. With chicken pox you can choose to minimise the risk through vaccinating your family and in the event of contracting it, staying home for the duration of the infectious period.[/quote Exactly! Plus children have either been vaccinated so it doesn't matter if they come into contact with my potentially contagious son or they haven't been vaccinated and (presumably) their parents want them to catch chicken pox whilst they are young. <em>edited by batgirls gal on 27/01/2014</em>
batgirls gal
170
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EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 26 January 2014 - 19:50
DS's nursery will not let him go for the next 15 days because his sister has chickenpox. DS doesn't have chickenpox (yet!), is it normal for a nursery to do this? They are behaving in a totally responsible manner. Your outrage shows that you are not. Chicken pox can be extremely serious, and is at its most infectious before the rash appears. And I sincerely hope for your work colleagues and adult friends that you have had it already and are not incubating the virus. It can be fatal in adults. edited by Livelytrish on 26/01/2014 It can be fatal in adults which is why the majority of people would prefer their children to catch chickenpox whilst they are children. There are millions of every day diseases which can occasionally prove fatal do you suggest that every sibling of every child with the common cold should be kept home in case somebody with a weakened immune system comes into contact with them? My elder daughter's school is aware that my younger daughter has chickenpox and they have not suggested that she stay off in case she is carrying the virus dormantly. I spoke to my paediatrician and explained the situation she thought it was ridiculous and was adamant they could not do this. Please don't be ridiculous, I thought we talking about chicken pox, a potentially serious illness, not a cold. And I suggest you change your paediatrician to one who has a better concept of communicable disease. And perhaps it might have been wiser to ensure that your children had been vaccinated. [b'>A cold has potential to kill, in someone with a weakened immune system it can turn into strep, flu, etc so what's the difference? Yes chicken pox can turn into a very nasty disease but so can countless other illnesses. [/b'> . A cold cannot turn into flu as they are caused by different viruses.Neither can it turn into strep throat as that is a bacterial infection. In my experience parents of children with a weak immune system and adults with weak immune systems take great care to avoid coming into contact with infectious diseases as it is often life threatening for them - they don't just go around hoping they wont catch something. It is more likely the unsuspecting, un-vaccinated who are at risk. Not according to [b'>google and NHS online.[/b'> I think we're getting away from the point here, which is should siblings be forced to stay off school and nursery simply because they MIGHT carry a dormant illness? Really? http://www.nhs.uk/conditions/Flu/Pages/Introduction.aspx do not rely on Google for medical information - there is a lot of rubbish out there. First one and plenty more www.cardiff.ac.uk/biosi/subsites/cold/commoncold.html by R Eccles - ‎Cited by 2 - ‎Related articles As we get older our immune system learns how to deal with more and more viruses as we generate antibodies each time we get a cold. Can a cold kill you? Yes!
batgirls gal
170
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EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 26 January 2014 - 19:41
DS's nursery will not let him go for the next 15 days because his sister has chickenpox. DS doesn't have chickenpox (yet!), is it normal for a nursery to do this? They are behaving in a totally responsible manner. Your outrage shows that you are not. Chicken pox can be extremely serious, and is at its most infectious before the rash appears. And I sincerely hope for your work colleagues and adult friends that you have had it already and are not incubating the virus. It can be fatal in adults. edited by Livelytrish on 26/01/2014 It can be fatal in adults which is why the majority of people would prefer their children to catch chickenpox whilst they are children. There are millions of every day diseases which can occasionally prove fatal do you suggest that every sibling of every child with the common cold should be kept home in case somebody with a weakened immune system comes into contact with them? My elder daughter's school is aware that my younger daughter has chickenpox and they have not suggested that she stay off in case she is carrying the virus dormantly. I spoke to my paediatrician and explained the situation she thought it was ridiculous and was adamant they could not do this. Please don't be ridiculous, I thought we talking about chicken pox, a potentially serious illness, not a cold. And I suggest you change your paediatrician to one who has a better concept of communicable disease. And perhaps it might have been wiser to ensure that your children had been vaccinated. [b'>A cold has potential to kill, in someone with a weakened immune system it can turn into strep, flu, etc so what's the difference? Yes chicken pox can turn into a very nasty disease but so can countless other illnesses. [/b'> . A cold cannot turn into flu as they are caused by different viruses.Neither can it turn into strep throat as that is a bacterial infection. In my experience parents of children with a weak immune system and adults with weak immune systems take great care to avoid coming into contact with infectious diseases as it is often life threatening for them - they don't just go around hoping they wont catch something. It is more likely the unsuspecting, un-vaccinated who are at risk. Not according to google and NHS online. I think we're getting away from the point here, which is should siblings be forced to stay off school and nursery simply because they MIGHT carry a dormant illness?
batgirls gal
170
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Latest post on 26 January 2014 - 19:06
DS's nursery will not let him go for the next 15 days because his sister has chickenpox. DS doesn't have chickenpox (yet!), is it normal for a nursery to do this? They are behaving in a totally responsible manner. Your outrage shows that you are not. Chicken pox can be extremely serious, and is at its most infectious before the rash appears. And I sincerely hope for your work colleagues and adult friends that you have had it already and are not incubating the virus. It can be fatal in adults. edited by Livelytrish on 26/01/2014 It can be fatal in adults which is why the majority of people would prefer their children to catch chickenpox whilst they are children. There are millions of every day diseases which can occasionally prove fatal do you suggest that every sibling of every child with the common cold should be kept home in case somebody with a weakened immune system comes into contact with them? My elder daughter's school is aware that my younger daughter has chickenpox and they have not suggested that she stay off in case she is carrying the virus dormantly. I spoke to my paediatrician and explained the situation she thought it was ridiculous and was adamant they could not do this. Please don't be ridiculous, I thought we talking about chicken pox, a potentially serious illness, not a cold. And I suggest you change your paediatrician to one who has a better concept of communicable disease. And perhaps it might have been wiser to ensure that your children had been vaccinated. A cold has potential to kill, in someone with a weakened immune system it can turn into strep, flu, etc so what's the difference? Yes chicken pox can turn into a very nasty disease but so can countless other illnesses. I believe no other nurseries have this policy which has answered my question. Btw I made a choice not to vaccinate based on research and discussions with our paediatrician. I am shocked at your arrogance, to presume you know more than a doctor specialising in children's illnesses with decades of experience.
batgirls gal
170
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Latest post on 26 January 2014 - 18:15
REHOME.........!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Good day all, I'm new to EW and hoping some of you could help. We are settling back into Dubai after a year off to have the baby and I'm back at work. My husband takes care of my 9 month old full time at the moment until we find a nanny/maid so he could find some work in Dubai. I agree, terrible wording. So if anyone is re-homing their nanny/maid please reply to this thread and forward your maids numbers so I can set up interviews with them. Thanking you in advance.
batgirls gal
170
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Latest post on 26 January 2014 - 18:13
DS's nursery will not let him go for the next 15 days because his sister has chickenpox. DS doesn't have chickenpox (yet!), is it normal for a nursery to do this? They are behaving in a totally responsible manner. Your outrage shows that you are not. Chicken pox can be extremely serious, and is at its most infectious before the rash appears. And I sincerely hope for your work colleagues and adult friends that you have had it already and are not incubating the virus. It can be fatal in adults. edited by Livelytrish on 26/01/2014 It can be fatal in adults which is why the majority of people would prefer their children to catch chickenpox whilst they are children. There are millions of every day diseases which can occasionally prove fatal do you suggest that every sibling of every child with the common cold should be kept home in case somebody with a weakened immune system comes into contact with them? My elder daughter's school is aware that my younger daughter has chickenpox and they have not suggested that she stay off in case she is carrying the virus dormantly. I spoke to my paediatrician and explained the situation she thought it was ridiculous and was adamant they could not do this.
batgirls gal
170
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Latest post on 26 January 2014 - 14:29
I know I'm furious. Could you imagine if we all had to keep our children off anytime anyone in the family was ill just in case they were carrying the illness dormantly (which is the reason I am being given ). My children would never be at school!
batgirls gal
170
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Latest post on 26 January 2014 - 13:43
DS's nursery will not let him go for the next 15 days because his sister has chickenpox. DS doesn't have chickenpox (yet!), is it normal for a nursery to do this?
batgirls gal
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EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 26 January 2014 - 13:35
Those that give an allowance, how do you physically manage it? Where we live there is no supermarket nearby, the only way she could get there at the moment would be for me to take her. Do you give them an allowance and have them do their own shopping on their own time, or does she come with you and just pick out her own things and pay for them? We have our first maid starting this week and its all new to me! My Maid does her food shopping on her days off. We have no problems doing it this way. She's happier with this and so am I :-)
batgirls gal
170
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 26 January 2014 - 10:43
Whilst the weather is so nice I would stick to outdoor things. There are so many nice parks and beaches here. Al Ain zoo is lovely too.
batgirls gal
170
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 26 January 2014 - 10:39
I find it easier to just give an allowance for food.
batgirls gal
170
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 17 January 2014 - 11:48
What an awful story. There must be a practical way we could help. Could we not organise an donation, if we all chipped in 20dhs or as much as we could afford that would soon add up. Anyone know the logistics of organising something like that? That poor baby, it's unbelievable.
batgirls gal
170
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 27 November 2013 - 20:07
I saw it on fb, cant find anything on there website.
batgirls gal
170
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 27 November 2013 - 17:57
Thanks
batgirls gal
170
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 26 November 2013 - 15:58
Thanks again for the replies, definitely lots of things to consider. Perhaps this tgread gives the impression this is all dh and i are thinking about, its not!! We have 3 awesome children that we spend our days running around after, playing with, laughing with and this is just one of those things that crops up. We thought it would be nice to get some thoughts from 'outsiders'. In hindsight I wish id never mentioned the money aspect of things as I think ive given the impression of being generally annoyed, etc, which isnt accurate. Im incredibly lucky and thankful for the life I have. I still feel if everything I had written had been gender reversed there would have been a very different reaction.
batgirls gal
170
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 26 November 2013 - 12:08
I would like to make it very clear my step dd is completely. unaware of anything, she thinks we are friends and doesnt even know we are discussing xmas morning. To those of you that think we are being unreasonable, would you really feel the same if a child lived with there mum full time? should the dad then have every single xmas morning? Yes this is all about the parents as I have already said when we casually mentioned xmas morning she clearly said she didnt mind as lonv as she got to see everyone.I know my little girl and she has no problem voicing her feelings. No we havent had a single holiday with her in 3 years which is very upsetting. we are trying to do our best.
batgirls gal
170
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 26 November 2013 - 09:46
There are several issues at play here: * Where your SDD spends xmas * Your DH's move abroad and the finances that go along with that (he decided to move hence he should pay the cost for the mother to see her child, whether that's the bus fare down the road or a flight) - ditto education which would be free in many countries * How you feel about your SDD's mother's parenting or lack thereof The latter 2 are colouring your view of the first issue. Just because you raise the daughter all year around and pay for the flights etc, does not entitle you to say where she spends xmas. This was a decision made by your DH upon agreeing custody. The bedwetting and mother staying out at night would surely mean the child is anxious, distressed etc however, surely this would mean she would say outright she does not enjoy her time there and wouldn't want to spend it with her mother? I think you need to separate the various issues as there is more than just xmas at play here. Love your posts and you usually echo my thoughts, so really do appreciate your comments! You are completely right, some of the things my stepp dd's mum does definitely clouds my judgement, which is the reason I asked for advice on here. I guess the real question is, genders aside, should a child spend every single xmas with the non resident parent to try and balance the fact that the child doesn't live there full time?
batgirls gal
170
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 26 November 2013 - 08:55
Thank you all for your replies. I am truly surprised that the general thought is that my step dd should spend xmas day with her mum again but asked the question so I could hear other perspectives and am glad to have received them. To the poster who called me selfish, etc you have absolutely no idea. Obviously I haven't given a great deal of background but the information I have given, for example the mum choosing to work last xmas day and giving my step dd to her grandparents for the day and her lack of financial support toward travelling costs was to highlight that we go to great lengths to be fair and ensure our little girl spends as much time with her mum as possible, despite things that her mum does, for example over the last 3 years my step dd has spent every single holiday in the UK (the point being for her to have time with her mum) yet on every single occasion her mum chooses to go on nights out with friends, etc and leaves her dd with various babysitters or grandparents for 'sleepovers.' On an average week long visit my step dd spends at least 3 nights sleeping elsewhere, if not 4. She is almost 9 years old, has never once wet the bed in our 3 years in Dubai, yet has a problem with this whilst in the UK. Despite this we continue to send her as we feel it is the right and fair thing to do. Just on a side note they were not married, there has been no court process. My dh told her mum he had been offered a job in Dubai and he would like to accept it but would not go without his dd, she said yes, she was not forced to, so whilst of course I am sympathetic to her situation it is not as though her daughter was ordered abroad by a judge, against her wishes.
batgirls gal
170
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 25 November 2013 - 22:14
Then what about asking the girl what she wants to do? As she is oblivious to all of the problems, she will tell you the truth. But maybe it would be better if it is her father who actually puts the question to her? I am a bit puzzled about the ;child support' that you mention. Is her mother significantly better off that your family? She doesn't mind and I believe her (something along the lines of as long as she gets pressies at both houses she doesn't care)! Her mum owns her own house, has a full time job, I don't expect she earns as much as my dh but does that mean she shouldn't contribute financially to her child's upbringing? Again if this was reversed and a dad wasn't paying toward his child what would your thoughts be??
batgirls gal
170
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 25 November 2013 - 22:11
As below I am familiar with the knot in my stomach having divorced parents and a step mum and step brothers. All I can say is what is fair on your step daughter? If it's normal for her to spend Christmas morning with her mum, that may be what she is more comfortable with. Obviously she will say she isn't bothered either way, she doesn't want to upset anyone. There were a few Christmas's I spent with my dad and step family where I couldn't help feeling bad on my mum. That's the difficult question, we have felt sorry for her mum which is why we have only had her with us for 2 xmas mornings out of 8, so yes she does normally spend it with her mum. However last year her mum chose to work it (without telling us) so my little girl actually spent the day with her grandparents.
 
 
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