sobevan | ExpatWoman.com
 

sobevan

sobevan
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Latest post on 21 April 2012 - 16:08
Yes, I do mean in regards to the violence and riots. He's a big fan and has been to AD and in the past to Montreal, Monaco, etc. Going or not going is not the main issue, but the unstable environment.
sobevan
154
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Latest post on 16 April 2012 - 14:22
Depending on what kind of wood it is (painted, stained, etc.) Waitrose sells some sort of a wax (John Lewis brand) that reeks, but works wonders. You rub it into the wood and the marks usually go away. I had ring marks from hot beverages come out, and red permanent magic marker. If your furniture is glossy wood (maybe even other kinds too, read the label in case), Olde English polish also takes care of marks. I have a can that I think I bought at LuLu, but not sure about that. Maybe it was Park n' Shop? I've never seen it at CF or Spinneys
sobevan
154
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Latest post on 16 April 2012 - 14:18
Yes, I just called DAA to inquire about this very thing and they were like, "No, we are starting on September 2." I wonder if this unified schedule thing is going to be real (and if so, implemented or mandated to the schools when - last week of August?) or if a lot of the schools have little loopholes (sponsors, etc.) to get them out of adhering to it. Just as I'm about to buy the flight tickets for the summer. Would be nice to know what the real deal is!
sobevan
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Latest post on 16 April 2012 - 10:31
I'd also like to know where you can get 13% from. Is this a long term savings account or are they funds etc *chimes in* `me too, please! I'm so glad someone asked this. I have been on my husband for MONTHS about this. Freaks me out that we have a bulk of our savings here. His logic is, no one is giving any decent interest rates, so who cares where it is. This may make him wake up and start investigating further! My e-mail is sobevan at gmail.com if you wouldn't mind passing me along the advisor's information. Thank you!
sobevan
154
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Latest post on 12 April 2012 - 19:00
Oh, now I feel bad. I didn't tip at all. It just didn't occur to me to do that when the price of their service is so high (but worth it of course). I also signed on for their quarterly maintenance and they've come twice already. When they came for the first time we left and came back when they called us. Same for the maintenance - although that doesn't take long - maybe 1 hour tops. Did everyone else tip and I'm the one loser who didn't? Yikes. This kind of stuff always confuses me. I wouldn't tip a plumber or electrician. Doesn't it fall into the same category? Can't wait to hear what others think.
sobevan
154
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Latest post on 09 April 2012 - 13:54
Okay, thanks. Good to know.
sobevan
154
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Latest post on 09 April 2012 - 11:44
Perhaps I should start a new thread, but checking that lovely table of school fees, the one I'm looking for is "undisclosed". Anyone know how much it costs to send a 2 year old or 3 year old to Children's Garden? Their fees are nowhere to be found on the net and since we will be responsible for it, want to know if I should even bother applying... Thanks!
sobevan
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Latest post on 07 April 2012 - 09:37
You can make it yourself, works great. Put 1 tablespoon of vinegar or lemon juice in a cup measure, then fill the rest of the line to 1 cup of milk. Then wait 5 minutes or so and it curdles/thickens like buttermilk. Works the same as buttermilk and no hassle of running around trying to find it. ETA This is for baking. I don't think that would work for like a salad dressing. <em>edited by sobevan on 07/04/2012</em>
sobevan
154
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Latest post on 05 April 2012 - 22:36
Sorry! Should have mentioned they were whole and not powder, whoops. At least you found it! Funny because back in the States, I used to have to go to the Greek store to buy it. All of the food from that region of Greece on through has so many similar recipes. Just the subtle little differences I guess. I can't find my grandmother's recipe (mom is on the hunt and hasn't responded yet), but I have another one (similar I think) from an Armenian cookbook that I have. My only problem with these recipes is that they always call for shortening (blech) and make enough to serve an army. I've been swapping out the shortening for butter because I can't be bothered to look for it or buy it. Usually works the same. Warning, I've never used this recipe so don't know if it works. Seems like a lot of flour, but all of the recipes in the book seem to have a different ratio. When in doubt, I'd not put in all the flour until the end after checking the dough. Maybe put in 4-5 cups and then see if it needs more? SOFT CHOEREG 2 pkg. active dry yeast 2 T sugar 1/2 c. warm water 1/2 c. Crisco shortening 1/2 c. butter 1 c. milk 6 c. flour 1 c. sugar dash of salt 1 T ground mahleb 1 tsp black seeds or ground fennel seed or both 2 large eggs, beaten 1 egg, slightly beaten for glaze sesame seeds Sprinkle yeast and 2T sugar over warm water and stir. Let stand 5 minutes or until foamy and yeast is activated. Melt together shortening and butter, stir in milk and cool to lukewarm. Mix together flour, sugar, salt, and spices/seeds (not sesame). Add eggs, yeast and shortening mixtures and mix until well combined. Cover and let rise in a warm place until doubled, about 1 hour. Punch down, pinch off small pieces of dough and form into twists, braids, rings or other shapes. Place on ungreased baking sheets. Let rise in warm place at least 2 hours. Brush with lightly beaten egg. Sprinkle with sesame seeds. Bake at 350F for 15 minutes or until golden. Makes 4-5 dozen.
sobevan
154
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Latest post on 05 April 2012 - 15:49
Did you ladies find it? I put fennel seed (ground) and sometimes nigella in mine. Have to dig out the recipe now! I'm of Armenian descent but the grandparents, etc. lived in eastern Turkey.
sobevan
154
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EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 04 April 2012 - 14:52
Time to bake some bread, I suppose? ;) They have them at LuLu by MOE. They aren't in the spice aisle, but the next one over at eye level (well, eye level if you're 5'2"). Packaged in a LuLu bag. Just bought mine the other day!
sobevan
154
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Latest post on 03 April 2012 - 16:34
I'm looking for: Milton sterilising fluid (for getting stains out of mugs) Ace stain remover Vanish spray for fabrics (not carpets) If you've seen any of these recently please let me know where! Thanks. PS. Does anyone know whether you can buy fresh sardines here? You can get mug stains out (and tile grout and pretty much anything) with a paste of baking soda and hydrogen peroxide. Leave it to sit for 30 minutes on the stain and then rinse it off. Voila. Can you not use a paste of baking soda and water for the mug stains?
sobevan
154
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EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 03 April 2012 - 16:33
I don't have rosacea, but have always had a problem with acne. I've gone down many routes - dermatologists, homeopaths, you name it. One dermatologist told me it may have something to do with dairy or chocolate. I had heard that before, but never thought much about it because there are just as many people who say that is rubbish. Anyway, I do notice a difference - if I go through a period of eating chocolate or ice cream (more sweets than usual), my skin breaks out straight away. When I stay away from that stuff and drink lots of water, I don't have it. The stress is a big contributing factor too. Maybe try eliminating some of that stuff from your diet for a week and see what happens? Also, in regards to the eating thing, I saw an Oprah show once where she was discussing eating habits and brought up a good point. Often we find ourselves looking in the fridge, cupboards, etc. because we think we're hungry or need something. She said to stop yourself and ask yourself what it is you really want. Like at 11pm do you really want ice cream? Or are you tired and want to sleep? Most of the time you're tired and want sleep. Once you acknowledge that and take care of your body's real need (sleep in this example), you no longer want the ice cream and you start to break out of the eating for no reason cycle. Food for thought. Bad pun, sorry.
sobevan
154
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Latest post on 29 March 2012 - 07:37
Manish is another good one. My friend who just visited got some stuff from them and she was happy with them.
sobevan
154
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Latest post on 26 March 2012 - 08:01
Aren't there 3 French schools, 1 being French/Lebanese? Only problem is I can't remember what it's called - I've heard that one is good as well. Or at least we have friends whose daughter goes there and they are happy with it. I also applied to the French school that you are probably talking about but for GS. I said to my husband as I paid the preregistration fee, "Here goes 500 dhs out the window." But we felt like we had to try. When I registered and asked my questions, they just said that they'd let us know mid-April one way or the other. I too was not given any indication of chance of getting in, apparently that's normal ("Sure, we'll take the 500 dhs even though you have no chance at all of getting in.") for all kinds of schools, not just the French ones.
sobevan
154
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Latest post on 26 March 2012 - 07:53
I've seen envelopes in Borders in the back towards the stationary section. Usually only just white.
sobevan
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Latest post on 26 March 2012 - 07:52
Well, from what I understand, all allowances (car, schooling, house, etc.) count towards your salary for tax purposes. So up to you to figure out how it works out better for your individual situation with what you can deduct and what you are earning. There are certain instances where you can deduct things, but not as much as if we were in US. I think you only get taxed on income above $91,000. I don't know - we have an accountant in NY who is awesome and takes care of everything for us legit so it is the most favorable. If you have someone back home who can advise you (unless there's someone here who can give you more info than me!), probably good to check it out. Ah, taxes. Good luck!
sobevan
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Latest post on 24 March 2012 - 09:08
Thanks ladies. I worry too much anyway. Hopefully all should be fine tomorrow. :) Thanks and enjoy the rest of the weekend (and rain?!?!?!?!)
sobevan
154
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Latest post on 24 March 2012 - 08:52
So I happened to be writing a message for him (correcting his grammar as English not his first language) this morning when I ask if he's ready to sign out. Inbox pops up and last Sunday there was a letter from DAA saying our son has been accepted. Great, except that we had to pay the deposit by (here's where it's weird) Thursday, March 25. Obviously, it's Saturday. Do you think I'm totally screwed? I'll pay it 1st thing tomorrow, but I'm so annoyed. Urrrrrrr. TIA
sobevan
154
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Latest post on 20 March 2012 - 13:55
Wanted to also add that we had our seat checked in US by the police dept or whoever ran that program and the woman (who was an expert - she had installed every kind of carseat in almost every type of car) said it also depends on your car. Technically, you are supposed to put a rear-facing seat in the middle seat, but not every car will allow you to properly install it in that position. We had a Subaru Outback at the time and you could not get it secure in the middle seat because it was too small. Wherever you put it, make sure you put your weight into the seat when fastening the belt/latch so that you can get it as tight as possible and the seat doesn't move more than 1 inch in any direction.
sobevan
154
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Latest post on 20 March 2012 - 13:48
Seriously SkyKitty, I'm flying on your plane next time! My 4 year old loves doing stuff like that (and giving instructions). He always wants to stand around in places to direct people either to stairs, ramps, elevators etc. "Strollers this way please. No sir, you have to use the stairs." It's hilarious. Now that I think about it, I think this particular flight attendant was not in our section because I didn't recall seeing her before that moment. Think that's why it made me so upset.
sobevan
154
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Latest post on 20 March 2012 - 10:16
Just wanted to add that I agree with a lot of you on the eating out in the restaurant stuff - yes, I go out with my kids, but don't put them in situations where they are going to melt down (out late, fancy place, etc.). Why torture yourself? As for the flight thing, there was just a whole stupid debate on the forum from where I used to live in the US because some family got kicked off a Jet Blue flight because the 3-year old was screaming. Can really get people riled up! I think most people are doing the best they can, although always makes me wonder why anyone would think a 2 year old needs coffee. Yikes. Anyway, you'll be fine I'm sure on the flight solo with the kids. Just be prepared with all the tricks and treats and I'm sure it will go okay. (Getting up to go to the bathroom is usually the trickiest.) 90-95% of the time my kids are fine, luckily. When it's not one of those times, well, I've survived thus far, alhamdulillah and you will too! :)
sobevan
154
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Latest post on 19 March 2012 - 15:20
I don't know how busy it will be, but the earlier you get there, the better chance you have of finding a good spot. We usually try to sit near the kid's play area. If you grab some seats at the edge inner edge, not outer where everyone passes through by the wave pool), you have quite a bit of space to park prams or just have a little extra room to wiggle about. If you get there too late, they all get taken. Otherwise, there is always room on the deck thing overlooking (sort of) one of those kneeboard things. It's by Leila's stand or something. You'll have plenty of room and be left alone, it's just not near any attractions. Have fun!
sobevan
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Latest post on 19 March 2012 - 12:09
Speaking as someone who regularly goes out alone to restaurants (hubby works a lot) with 2 kids (1 and 4) and travels back to US alone with them once a year, for the most part, it works. But like so many have said before, your kid could have one of those moments and when you've done the best you can and it's still not working. Reminds me of my flight back here to DXB past August. 1st flight was great, both kids angelic. 2nd flight, I'm on no sleep, exhausted from keeping the peace and keeping cranky kids happy in 15th hour of travel, and 4 year old was just not in the mood to listen or stop doing laps (running) around the cabin. No matter what I did, I couldn't get him to settle down until he got knocked down by a flight attendant (unintentionally and he wasn't even fazed by it) shortly before landing and it was utter **** trying to keep him restrained in his seat with his seatbelt fastened while also balancing infant on my lap who is now squirming to get out, all while not yelling and making a scene that would disturb other passengers. Sometimes he can be really difficult and that was one of those times. The flight attendant who knocked him down said, "Didn't you bring anything for him to do?" And I almost lost it because I had done EVERYTHING you're "supposed" to do to keep kids busy - the new toys, the DVDs, the coloring, the snacks, the whole 9 yards and then some. It worked for 3/4 of the trip. And then he was done. Aren't we after doing a long trip with the security checks and multiple flights and waiting (even if it's only 1 1/2 hours) during your stopover? What do we expect from a kid? They just can't express their frustration and exhaustion in the same way as an adult. I wanted to yell, "Have a little respect - I'm doing the best I can, I'm not perfect". But in reality, it made me so upset that I cried. The comment and the looks I got from a few other people directly told me they all assumed I'm that type of lax mother who doesn't care if her kid runs wild. And that could not be farther from the truth. I think what people forget is, some people really are doing their best to keep their kids under control and not disturb others around them, but sometimes, all **** breaks loose. It doesn't mean necessarily that the parent doesn't do anything or doesn't care, but it's so easy to look at someone and make a snap judgment. We have absolutely no idea where they're coming from, what other issues are causing this behavior, what the parent has already done to try and rectify the situation, or even, can you get out of there (a plane? where can you go). The last thing someone needs is our "well I would be handling this differently, you too." I've learned in these rare instances, ignore the judge judy's out there and do the best you can.
sobevan
154
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Latest post on 19 March 2012 - 11:43
Quick question - did you bring children? Would it be appropriate for children to go? The only word-of-mouth info I have on Armenia is probably outdated, but makes it sound like a hot mess half the time (cuts in electricity, etc.). Glad to hear your good words! Always good to find new places to explore.
sobevan
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Latest post on 18 March 2012 - 11:43
I would also get in contact with some doulas here in Dubai. They probably have loads of recommendations for you as to where you might have a better chance of achieving a VBAC, plus having one at your side for the birth is great. Try Dubai Doulas or the Be Empowered group. Also, maybe they can help you steer away from some places/doctors that may not accommodate you or share your same beliefs in terms of labor/delivery. Hope it goes well!
sobevan
154
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Latest post on 16 March 2012 - 13:17
Shingles isn't actually contagious, but if you have never had chickenpox, a person with shingles can make you get chickenpox as they come from the same virus. I'm not sure how common it is for a baby to get chickenpox, so I would check with your doctor. I would think that 2 weeks should be sufficient time for her to not transmit the virus, but you never know. Just wanted to also add that he vaccine issue wouldn't even come into play, as you aren't supposed to give the chickenpox vaccine until the child is at least 1 year old. The other vaccines routinely given at 2 months won't protect your child from the shingles/chickenpox virus.
sobevan
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Latest post on 15 March 2012 - 19:31
Just pulled out my bill. It was 3800 for the 4 units - we actually use our maid's room for storage and never put on the AC so it wasn't counted in the quote. I think the prices quoted are pretty legit.
sobevan
154
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Latest post on 15 March 2012 - 13:09
We have 4 units in the house and 1 in the maid's room. I think they charged 3800 dhs. 3600? It wasn't more than 3800. Anyway, a far cry from other cleaners who charge 500 or something per unit, but I don't think those other companies are as thorough, nor do they disinfect. And it's chemical-free (I'm super sensitive to chemicals - can't use regular cleaning products, have to be natural/essential oil based). Oh and the guys on the team are clean - clean uniforms, clean shoes, don't stink, etc., punctual, what they say is what you get. Worth every dirham.
sobevan
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Latest post on 15 March 2012 - 12:11
We used/use Saniservice. They are awesome. They take everything apart, take all the ceiling panels out and vent thingies off and clean everything, then disinfect. We have them coming every 3 months to do a maintenance clean and disinfect. It's not cheap, but I think it's worth it. We were all coughing and I smelled mildew in one room when the AC was on and they were able to take care of it. Just the one room that smelled particularly bad took I think 2 or 3 tries to get the smell out (they said that is normal). A lot of these other AC cleaners just clean the filters and the vents but don't get in there and get it all. These guys came all day one day - I think there were 8 or 10 of them working on 5 units in our house. I highly recommend. I think they do cars too and I'm tempted to inquire about how much it costs....
sobevan
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Latest post on 13 March 2012 - 21:35
Thanks, will check it out. :)
sobevan
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Latest post on 13 March 2012 - 18:37
little cotton bags with lavender sandlewood blocks of wood and put oil on them. Perhaps a stupid question, but where does one buy something like that?
sobevan
154
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Latest post on 10 March 2012 - 08:34
If this is the one out on 77 Lahbab Road, we were there in October. They used to do the show about the desert in an amphitheatre there 2 or 3 years ago. Now the theatre part is deserted, as is much of the place, but from what they told me, they were working on getting things up and running. It is still listed I think as Al Sahra Resort but they never turned it into a hotel (nor do they plan to, as far as I understood). They do, however, have a lot going on if you ride horses (my niece does, which is why we went out there) and have some really interesting camel interaction packages where you learn about camels and get to feed them and all of that stuff. My niece ended up going on a 1 hour ride in the desert with one of the women there (each on their own horse). They were so nice and accommodating, I wish we had other visitors who were interested in it because it would be lovely to support them. If I can find the information details, will post them.
sobevan
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Latest post on 23 February 2012 - 09:42
I've posted on these guys before, but they are AWESOME. And you pay less than 110-150 per necklace (silver), but you have to go to Sharjah. Al Sabaik in the blue souk (central souq). From the Ranches it's 35 minutes to get there. They do straight across, in a drop style, in a disc style, lots to choose from.
sobevan
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Latest post on 13 February 2012 - 17:10
Hi, just wanted to throw in 2 cents as our visitors just did this also this afternoon. And I'm nosy so I asked a lot of questions for them. :) There happened to be at least 15 people in their group as well, although half were children. Still, that's a lot, I think. Guests were wearing jeans and t-shirts and FROZE even with the outerwear on, so wear a sweater underneath if you go. Same as singing canary wrote, it's a huge ripoff. They said it was neat to touch the penguins, but so not worth the 175 dhs. One thing they did say that disturbed me a bit was that the guide explained what you can and cannot do when you're with the penguins, but there were still people disobeying the rules (like holding onto them when they wanted to walk or something). I wanted to get clarification on whether or not they were told off, but didn't get a straight answer. I guess what bothers me the most about that is how some people think they are above the rules and do whatever they want anyway. Urrrrrr! Calming down, but still shaking my head in disbelief is the issue of photos - they aren't 85 dhs like in the snow pro shop, but 100 DIRHAMS EACH! I think they feel they can charge that because they give you a fancy heavyweight frame/folder thing to put it in, but if your photo is vertical, you can't display it in the holder. When I asked about what was available (packages and prices) I was told that 1 photo is 100, 2 are 150 (but the 2nd photo is in the usual cheap folder thing, which is fine), 3 photos are 300 (logic anyone?), and for 400 dhs you get a CD of all the photos, 3 copies of actual photos (I think only 1 in the fancy folder, but not sure) and a snow globe. And if you want t-shirts (one of our guests wanted to buy some t-shirts for her grandchildren), they are 145 dhs each!!!!!!!!!!!! All in all, not a cheap outing.
sobevan
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Latest post on 12 February 2012 - 21:59
I had to do mine for USA and I needed to have official "official" copies (for example, you can get official copies from the town where you were born or married, but they can't verify (eye roll) that they are real, so you usually have to go through your state capital's records department) that you then send to the Department of State of your state, then they get sent to the US Dept of State (Hillary's office) and then you can take them to the consulate here and they attest (authenticate) them. It takes a long time unless you expedite (hear the cash register sounds ringing) and FedEx/DHL everything. Even then, you're looking at 4-6 weeks.
sobevan
154
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Latest post on 12 February 2012 - 16:43
You also may want to go to one of these open houses by a group that has 2 doulas I've used in the past. You could get some good information to help guide you along the way. It's called Be Empowered. http://be-empowered.weebly.com/index.html I think in terms of respecting a birth plan, internal exams, all of that stuff, it really depends on who you choose as an OB/GYN (obstetrician/gynecologist - OB part being about the delivering babies end of the "area") and where you deliver. A lot of the doulas who have been here for a while are pretty good at helping you figure out the best place for you to go. And I just lOVE LOVE LOVE having a doula for labor and delivery. They can probably better answer your specific questions. I would think though that in any situation, if you don't want an internal exam, you should be able to refuse. If not, isn't that rather messed up that you can't say no to someone sticking their finger up your private parts? It's your right to say no to that. I had no internal exams at all during my last pregnancy/labor. I take that back - once, because the baby wasn't making his final exit (I didn't want my water broken either), but I was so ready to be done and felt I wasn't going anywhere that I let her do it and then like 10 minutes later, he was born. But she kept saying, "are you sure, you told me you didn't want your water broken." Like almost didn't want to do it because I hadn't wanted her to. But I delivered in RAK. Anyway, check out the Be-Empowered crew. They will probably have loads of info for you and Monika and Silvia (the 2 doulas I used) are amazing!
sobevan
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Latest post on 06 February 2012 - 21:44
I have a CityMini and bought some sort of a bassinet attachment from someone on Dubizzle last year. It came with some u-bar things for the carseat attachments, so I wonder if it would work for you? You are welcome to try. Where are you located/how can we meet up?
sobevan
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Latest post on 03 February 2012 - 20:08
Shingles is the adult form of the chicken pox virus. But instead of it popping out all over your body, it usually localizes itself in one area. My friend had it on her torso. I would hope they would have thought about that, but then again, I don't know how common it is here in this part of the world. In America, there seem to be so many cases of shingles that they (surprise) created a vaccine for it.
sobevan
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Latest post on 01 February 2012 - 21:29
I'm not a doctor, but my friend had something similar - turned out to be shingles. Have they ruled that out at all? I don't think it was anything harmful to the baby. Stay positive! Hope you figure it out soon.
sobevan
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Latest post on 31 January 2012 - 20:20
If you feel like going to Sharjah to the Blue Souk, Al Sabaik is AWESOME. I gave them a rough idea of what I wanted for a ring and they delivered. It is so beautiful. They are also very honest and from my experience, if you don't like what they do with the piece you've commissioned, they'll redo it. If you go there, they are on one of the bridges all the way at the end. Best way to explain is if you are coming from Dubai (from 11 - I think it turns into 113 or something like that) and turn down King Faisal street (112?), when you approach the souk, there is water to the left of it. There are 2 buildings (left and right) connected overhead by 2 bridges (near and far in relation to coming from Dubai). They are on the far bridge, first shop on the right if you are entering from the right sided building. I cannot love this store more than I do. They do really great Arabic name stuff too.
sobevan
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Latest post on 21 January 2012 - 23:35
elaineganm - Would love to chat if you want to. I am going away for a short holiday and will be back at the end of January. Maybe we can catch up then?
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Latest post on 21 January 2012 - 02:00
I just want to say that I understand what you're going through. I'd love to tell you that it's easy to just forget about the people who judge, but it's easier said than done. And when you go through something like that, even if people aren't judging, we think they are (or at least I did). I don't know if it's the hormones or the guilt or the sadness. My son is 14 months old and thinking about it still, I get a little defensive - I realize that's my issue. But there are so many people out there who when you mention that you have a problem either a) don't believe you and just think you're not trying hard enough/giving up too easily or b) encourage you to keep trying and trying "because it gets easier" without first asking if it's really the best thing for the mother. Yes, it is best for the baby, but not when the mother is feeling guilty or frustrated or upset or in pain or exhausted from trying everything she possibly can. Sure, it gets easier if you don't have to deal with other medical issues. Maybe that is selfish, but I think I listened too much to other people instead of to my own body. And it is nice to hear the encouraging words (all true) that you lovely ladies have written before me, but when you're in that place where the OP is (I'm guessing, or maybe just me reliving my horrible experience!), it's hard to let those words in and accept them. Hormones can really throw you for a loop. My long story short - with 1st child had supply issues similar to you, although no infections or c-section or anything. Just dried up after 1 month and was never really much of anything in the first place. The big joke was I was supplementing the formula with the teeny bit of breast milk I was able to produce. Good news, 2nd time around, plenty. However, I couldn't get my son latched in the hospital and not until the 2nd day I got home. Then, it wasn't really coming out the way it was supposed to. I basically was in pain 24/7. Nothing gave me relief. And I felt so guilty because deep down, I knew I wanted to quit because it was the most excruciating thing I have ever experienced - and both my kids were natural unmedicated chid births, both over 4 kg), but ignored that voice and kept pushing because it was going to be fine, like everyone says. Turns out not fine - horrendous recurring mastitis, resulting in taking every strong antibiotic known to man, abscesses (fun!) and almost 3 months of torture in and out of hospital. I obviously had to stop BFing early on in the process in order to rid my body of the infection, but as I was lying in the hospital with bandages and IV tubes of latest wonder drug, I STILL had people saying, "Don't worry, you'll be up and lactating soon. It is the best for your child you know. You really need to get back to doing that." The words I wanted to use cannot be typed, or shouted at anyone here at all, really, so I just said, "Are you kidding me?" So I think you need to allow yourself this time to be angry and upset, but also try and think about what the real root of the guilt/depression is. Because I think a lot of the times it isn't just the fact that breast milk is better for your child. And you don't have to tell anyone but yourself. That really helped me to move on and accept the situation for what it is. One technique I found helpful was sitting in a quiet room for 15 minutes or whatever and using my non-dominant hand to write whatever comes into your head. Or if you can talk to a therapist or someone who can help you to focus on the positive thoughts (I did that too), it was really uplifting. I guess what I'm saying is, yes we need to hear the positive reinforcement from our friends, but until you make peace with it yourself, it's hard. I didn't mean to ramble on for 9 million paragraphs, but just let you know I support you, even if we don't know each other. It will get better. Please let me know if you want to talk more. It's easier sometimes talking to someone who's been there. And by the way, I don't think my kids are any more or less sick than other people's. I don't even think of it anymore because in the end, it doesn't matter. It isn't just breastfeeding that sets kids up to be healthy or smart - of course it helps, but really in the end it's a long-term multi-faceted success plan, I like to say. Give them lots of love, healthy food, exercise and fun (wow that sounds cheesy) and they'll be golden. Side note to anyone out there who helps women with breastfeeding - I realize that it's not in anyone's best interest to scare new moms, but I do wish someone would have gone over some of the "troubleshooting issues" in a little more practical way. I feel like wherever I had questions (here, USA with 1st child, etc.) it was like, "Oh, this or that can happen, but it's not a big deal and not very common. You just deal with it and keep going." Sometimes the solution isn't so cut and dried - when it's not, it ends up making you feel like a failure or a freak which is a horrible feeling. And whether or not that sounds rational, let's remember the hormone overload. And sometimes the solution is stopping, which no one mentions, hence the feelings of guilt. I'm going to stop typing now and get some sleep!:) Thank you for your patience!
sobevan
154
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 19 January 2012 - 10:18
All I know is, when we came here, I started doing an itemized list of what everything was worth and when I showed it to the guy, he was like, "Oh that's going to be expensive." I just put down a number (way less than the actual worth) and it was more reasonable. In the end, 2 or 3 things were broken, including a leather chair that was slashed. The process of getting reimbursed (and they only ended up reimbursing the chair) was a NIGHTMARE.
sobevan
154
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 17 January 2012 - 20:21
Forgot to add that I don't see a ton of tracks for sale anyway here. A lot of sets, but not a huge selection of tracks all the time. Just at ikea.
sobevan
154
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 17 January 2012 - 20:19
Ours fit fine with all sorts of tracks. Brio, ikea, imagination toys r us, melissa and doug, etc. Thomas ones are outrageously expensive I won't buy them, but we have trains. The only issue we had was with the new trains bash and dash. They are 1 or2 mm taller than the others and don't always fit under non-Thomas bridges. But who cares in the end about that. Not the end of the world, right?
sobevan
154
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 17 January 2012 - 20:14
Carter's is great and way cheaper in u.s. If you can find an outlet store, it's dirt cheap. (coming from me whom loads up every summer on trips to USA. Can't resist those bargains! If you happen to find an outlet mall, they also have stride-rite stores which are pretty good shoes. I was lucky this summer and found a geox outlet and got my son shoes for under $30 (100 dhs). They are 300-400 dhs here! Oshkosh is decent as well and nearly always next to a carter's. Old navy sometimes has nice stuff for cheap. I second target. Greatest store ever. The other nice thing about a lot of shops is they have sales all the time and often coupons. Just ask and people are helpful. You may overflow those few extra kilos! (I know I would!) happy shopping!
sobevan
154
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 17 January 2012 - 19:53
Wow, that is really nice of you. I'm in ranches. Would be mid/end february. Should I e-mail you?
sobevan
154
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 17 January 2012 - 19:51
It is my understanding that fresh cocoa pods are pretty hard to come by no matter where you live unless it is a country where it grows. They do sell raw cocoa beans in the organic store in Dubai mall if that helps.
sobevan
154
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 17 January 2012 - 15:54
oooh, didn't realize that the "finish early but charge for the full time" thing was commonplace. The first (and only) person I had was pretty conscientious. Hmmmmm. Thanks for that info, good to know.
 
 
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