VictoriaM | ExpatWoman.com
 

VictoriaM

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EW GURU
Latest post on 08 October 2013 - 18:10
Kings.
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EW GURU
Latest post on 08 October 2013 - 16:54
Hi Feefmick, Sounds reasonable. Less than the current school (which can be too much, especially when project based, as you say). Also, how much Arabic do they do per week in school, is it a daily class?
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EW GURU
Latest post on 08 October 2013 - 16:39
PlainJane, which year has your youngest gone into by the way? And for any other DESS mums out there (Feefmick perhaps?) is it true that they get very little homework, even in year 5/6?
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EW GURU
Latest post on 08 October 2013 - 15:50
MairAm, yes I think Kings may well be just as good a school. But at the moment it doesn't have a 'proper' fully-fledged secondary with all the facilities and resources it should have. Once Al BArsha is built and open, all well and good, but until then there is no certainty on the secondary. PlainJane, glad your two are enjoying DESS and DESC. Kids do adjust so quickly, and In my heart of hearts I am sure that ours would too if it came to it.
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EW GURU
Latest post on 07 October 2013 - 18:39
CHewit, calling DESC to get some actual facts is a great idea. I didn't realise you could do that - there doesnt seem to,be much transparency in schools here.
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EW GURU
Latest post on 07 October 2013 - 18:37
A RAncher, yes its sometimes true about choice. I actually hoped DD wouldn't be offered a place to avoid having to make such a difficult decision. Hopefully now the migraine I've had for the 2 days since the offer came through will go away!! Def stress related.
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EW GURU
Latest post on 07 October 2013 - 12:31
Yes perhaps!! I did ask her, so she would assume from that that I was clueless!
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EW GURU
Latest post on 07 October 2013 - 12:25
Our new maid (not Muslim) says she has always has Eid off and been paid extra if her madam has wanted her to work instead. So there are obviously lots of people around who don't know that maids are not entitled to any leave at Eid.
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EW GURU
Latest post on 07 October 2013 - 12:08
Interesting CHewit, and reassuring. I know someone who applied to DESC on the first day they took applications and didn't get in. So not surprisingly assumed it was hard to get a place. Also heard its first come first served provided you pass the entrance test, rather than taking those with the best scores. Sounds like JC is no longer an option. But as you say, there are a few others.
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EW GURU
Latest post on 07 October 2013 - 10:52
Yes I agree that's really important at this age (9) Meagle. She will be coming on the school tour (which unfortunately they can't now do till after half term) and IVe asked her what she thinks. So far she has said she loves her school and doesn't want to move. So a move would have to have a very definite benefit to make it worthwhile pulling a happy, settled child out. In the short term certainly there would be more negatives than pluses. My gut feeling at the moment is to stay put. I dont want to jeopardise DD's happiness, or progress (moves set kids back I believe), both of us have friends there we dont want to leave, education wise it is working fine and it is also very convenient. Yes the future at Kings is uncertain, but, as you say SImpleas, we may not even be here for year 7. If we are (which is likely), we will just have to take our chances at the time like everyone else. And who knows, Kings secondary may prove to be good anyway. We may be crazy to be seriously considering turning a place at DESS (and hence DESC) down, but at the moment, accepting doesn't seem like the right thing to do. Thanks ladies for helping me clarify my thoughts and feelings.
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EW GURU
Latest post on 06 October 2013 - 22:59
Good point SImpleas. Any idea what sort of child the schools may not suit, or may suit less well?
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EW GURU
Latest post on 06 October 2013 - 22:13
Mich, I appreciate the grass isn't always greener - that's why I'm asking for opinions! And I agree totally with what you say about having to settle into a new school and make new friends. Not ideal at all. In an ideal world we would want to do as you suggest. Stay until year 6 and then see which secondary school is the best fit. But unfortunately it's not that simple! It's less about finding the right fit than which school you can get your child into, if any. Competition seems to be becoming fiercer and choice a luxury. The option of DESC may not be open to DD later on. Certainly the number of kids getting into other secondaries, including DESC, from Kings at the end of the last academic year was low.
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EW GURU
Latest post on 06 October 2013 - 20:16
Exactly Jules, if it ain't broke don't fix it. And yes, based on the success of the primary school, the secondary may well be excellent! But who knows, there is always that uncertainty. Our experience of the school has also been largely positive. There is some overcrowding now though with the secondary classes that should be elsewhere and the further expansion of the primary last month. And it does all seem more chaotic than last year. Aan awful lot of new teachers too! But that has pluses as well as minuses, like lots of extra resources.
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EW GURU
Latest post on 06 October 2013 - 18:45
Hi A Rancher, We won't be the first guinea *** year. By the time DD gets to year 7, it would actually be the fourth year the school has been teaching secondary. However, the new 'all through' campus would only have been in operation for a year, and thats in the best case scenario assuming nothing else goes awry (as has happened thus far and as things tend to in DUbai)! So still very much in its infancy, at least compared to UK schools, with no track record of exam results or university entrance. Judging by the standards of the primary school it wouldnt be unreasonable to assume the secondary will be equally strong, but there is no certainty. DESC is hardly long standing either! But at least it has already been through the process Kings will be going through, and seems to have improved progressively. The cohort will likely have got stronger academically too, and I think the same will happen at Kings as more and more parents put their faith in it. But in the early years it is undoubtedly a leap of faith. DESC just seems to have built up such a good reputation already, and is a very well liked school in respects that are broader than the academic. DESS/DESC are not hugely convenient for us location wise, but both run bus services (which Id rather not use yet tbh as it means a very early start and long journeys). Of course the other issue is fees: Kings secondary fees are unjustifiably steep for a new school IMHO, and DESC far more reasonable. These are all arguments for a move to DESS/DESC, but perhaps the most important thing is that we currently have a happy child and we wouldn't want to compromise that.
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EW GURU
Latest post on 26 September 2013 - 08:36
Thanks camvic, you've reminded me I saw loads in a branch of Boots here but had forgotten. Off to MOE later to check it out!
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EW GURU
Latest post on 25 September 2013 - 11:35
Dragon, are you sure the additional January expansion is still due to take place? There is simply no more room!! I heard that plan had been canned. Poor people relying on those spots though! Do wish the school would be more open about the situation. The rumour mill,is going berserk!
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EW GURU
Latest post on 25 September 2013 - 11:27
I use their tinted moisturiser (sheer tint), great for this climate as nice and light and contains an SPF. Also use their eye cream with SPF (total eyecare?), and their ultra sensitive face sunblock, which is a mineral sun cream rather than chemical. Been using their stuff for 10 plus years and seems to have helped prevent wrinkles. On which note, I'm out of stock. Anyone know where i can buy Dermalogica in the Umm Suqeim/Jumeirah area?
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EW GURU
Latest post on 04 July 2013 - 14:48
Crux, yes she was on good terms with her previous employer, but they didnt take a copy and have now left the country. Wish we'd have known about this before they cancelled everything!
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EW GURU
Latest post on 04 July 2013 - 14:44
Aha, thanks very much for the info, it makes things much clearer. I think the ID certificate is just what we need (first we were asked by the PRO to get a copy of the card and then a letter). Do you know why we need this certificate though? Does the new ID card have to be the same number as the old one perhaps? Also helpful to know you need to apply for the ID card before you get the visa - we couldnt understand why the PRO was focusing on the ID card and not just getting on with the visa.
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EW GURU
Latest post on 24 June 2013 - 16:38
We used ERE homes to find a villa in the Ranches last year. They were great - professional, helpful, personable. Way better than any other agent we encountered. Have since had dealings with them again recently and I haven't changed my opinion.
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EW GURU
Latest post on 20 June 2013 - 12:01
YDr Evan at Dubai London Clinic dental centre on Al Wasl Road Jumeirah 1. Lovely dentist.
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EW GURU
Latest post on 12 June 2013 - 11:06
My expectation is first controlling the weeds! In the Uk Id have used weedkiller but they dont seem to do that here, well not that Ive seen. Easier than weeding by hand all the time. I could do that myself, just annoys me to be paying someone and then have to do it myself. Compound paving very weedy too, hence my thinking that its just something they dont do much of here. And second tending the plants, training, staking, pruning etc, none of which I feel qualified to do properly. Current "gardener" is just a compound maintenance guy not a proper gardener. Took him on for convenience when we arrived here, but he clearly doesnt know what he is doing, and given that he is also expensive.... Local nursery/gardening company has just quoted me far less than him for 6 days a week gardening and watering, so its a no brainer. Its really handy having guys in the compound to do odd jobs but I have found them ridiculously expensive. I dont think they should cost more than professional maintenance/gardening companies, especially when they dont have any transport costs to get here!
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EW GURU
Latest post on 12 June 2013 - 10:31
I know there are a lot of useless gardeners here, but what should I reasonably expect our gardener to be doing? We only have a small paved courtyard garden and terrace. After the one-off job of preparing the ground and planing plants (paid as a one-off), our gardener now comes in daily to water our plants but does nothing else. For this we are paying him 250 a month!! The paving and newly planted beds mean a lot of weeds, and we had expected him to keep on top of them. Is this not a normal expectation here given that our previous gardener elsewhere also had an aversion to weeding? What about staking and training of new climbers? He is leaving everything to grow randomly wiht no support, whereas I am out there every day trying to train stems etc and am chomping at the bit to rip all the weeds out! Surely a gardener should do more than water the plants? That job could be done by us or our maid. its all the more irritating when Ive just found out through neighbours that maintenance ripped out the irrigation system the previous tenants had installed! Can any of you ladies tell me what I should reasonably expect.
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EW GURU
Latest post on 02 June 2013 - 11:26
Hi Sandybean, I went through the same search when I got here last year And remember the puzzled expressions well! Opticians and chemists all pointed me to the contact lens solutions. I never did find any saline in Boots or pharmacies. Pickachu are you referring to saline or contact lens solutions (not the same thing)? It appears that contact lens users in DUbai use their all-purpose contact lens solutions to rinse, whereas in the UK some of us at least use saline. I now get visitors to bring it from Boots in the UK or stock up at home. If stuck I use the all-purpose solution, but it is much more expensive.
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EW GURU
Latest post on 27 May 2013 - 21:07
Sugarbeach, nice idea, but very expensive no? Mind you, with the salaries some of these maids are getting as it is. Had one round today earning 2,600 (salary of 2000 plus various allowances including for being on the PAlm with no transport). Liked her a lot but don't think we can afford her.
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EW GURU
Latest post on 27 May 2013 - 13:42
Pickachu, yes I know, it can be a bit irritating at times. The kids here do need to learn some boundaries like not opening people's doors and just waltzing in! But for us it is a small price to pay for there always being kids around to play with DD. She is an only, so we can't be self sufficient in the way that larger families can be. Horses for courses.
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EW GURU
Latest post on 27 May 2013 - 10:59
Would agree with you about villas surrounding the parks. DD found a friend opposite one of ours and its a child magnet! The through roads away from the parks are less good. Best to Take care to choose the right location within whichever AR community. Still think compounds with shared facilities are perfect for kids. Loads running around playing in ours, and in and out of each others houses. That was what we were looking for and we found it by moving from AR to a smaller compound.
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EW GURU
Latest post on 27 May 2013 - 10:46
Desert Rose - yes that is one thing I am checking on/stressing at interview, that I want the maid back to sleep in her room at night. Regarding hours and flexibility, our contract (the standard one from immigration) just says hours/duties as agreed. I think we should add something to say flexible hours as required. There must be maids out there that don't need or want rigidity and are happy to go with the flow and finish earlier or later depending on circumstances. The one I've interviewed already has been flexible with hours according to her current employer, and one I'm seeing later sounded very willing on the phone. There seems to be an excess of supply at the moment, with many families wanting to,wait till September to recruit, so maids will have to be flexible.
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EW GURU
Latest post on 27 May 2013 - 10:40
KH there seem to be lots of maids with employers returning home at the moment, so might be a good time to pick up someone who is recommended. If it gets to the autumn then I think I may try an agency as you suggest and for the reasons you mention. Hopefully then we may get a year or two without demands!
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EW GURU
Latest post on 27 May 2013 - 10:37
And judging by the classifieds there are loads of maidslooking at the moment, so yes you may be inundated!
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EW GURU
Latest post on 26 May 2013 - 13:34
Thanks ladies. Starting interviewing again this afternoon! Love having a spotless house, so going to brave it again, this time with a bit of wisdom behind me. I've learnt so much about maids recently, so fingers crossed things work out next time.
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EW GURU
Latest post on 25 May 2013 - 16:24
Yes, all done and dusted. And after all the doubts, questions and nerves it all went very well. She went and packed thinking she was going to her sisters, ie being released by us to find another job. Part of the way down SZR she worked out where we were going and said we should have told her as she wouldn't have run away! But we didn't know that did we?! As it turned out she said she was relieved to be going home and really seemed quite happy. We definitely did the right thing. She asked me why we'd chosen that route and I explained about us being responsible for her until she leaves the country or finds another sponsor, and she accepted that. So we are happy not to be worrying about what she is up to in DUbai that we may be held accountable for, and she is happy back home - a positive end to the story. Whether or not she will have learned not to be rude and demanding with her employer is another matter though! She may not get the chance to demonstrate as none of her three employers will be providing references for her. Now to find another maid and be VERY clear, in writing, right from interview what is required, and not agree later to any deviation from that agreement. Thanks so much for all your words of wisdom ladies, and apologies that it all became a bit tedious!
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EW GURU
Latest post on 24 May 2013 - 13:15
It's a horrible thing to have to do Pickachu, you're not wrong. It's a last resort. There is no other alternative that doesn't put us at risk. I cant have her in the villa arguing and making demands, making our home miserable, so she has to go.
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EW GURU
Latest post on 24 May 2013 - 12:20
Agree - We are both going. Can't give her minutes notice as she will need to pack, but only long enough to do that. Is it right that immig can take care of her if very early? Timing is dictated not by flight time but by time she makes a move to go to her sisters for the weekend.
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EW GURU
Latest post on 24 May 2013 - 00:51
Agree blue, it has become tedious. We have booked her a plane ticket for tomorrow. Now just have to work out the logistics so that it goes as smoothly as can be expected. Not looking forward to tomorrow and will be mighty relieved when all over.
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EW GURU
Latest post on 23 May 2013 - 21:50
Sugarbeach, no its not the red tape that bothers me about sending our maid home, its the doing something against her will that she is likely to react badly to. It's just all a bit unpleasant. Quick question for anyone still up: Getting a ticket to Manila is no problem, but our maid comes from another island. What do we do about that? Do we have to get her a domestic ticket too? If so that's more complicated as I dont know where her family lives now, nor who flies there. Are domestic flights in the PHilipines cheap, frequent and no need tO book? If so she can sort it out herself when she gets there. Don't know if we'd need to give her the money thor that flight.
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EW GURU
Latest post on 23 May 2013 - 18:18
DR you are right on all counts. You have given me the advice I need but I have been unable to act on it yet. We need to get our heads around the idea of sending her home. It's a tough thing to do when you're not used to situations like this. And it just feels so brutal. Despite what POwerpuff says, we keep envisaging a repeat of the sort of tears and tantrums we have already seen. Fortunately she is a very small lady! Eli, very sobering story. I could envisage us in a similar situation with our maid struggling to find a job. And we are going to have problems if asked for written or verbal references as the truth is not going to get her a job. Sending her home would avoid us getting into that position and a ban would speak for itself. Agree with DR. There is nothing more that can be said, so let's just leave things now and we will try and get our heads around what we need to do. Could I just thank everyone for taking the time to try and help. I will update once whatever deed is done. And sorry to spoil your Thursday night by removing the source of entertainment! Hope there's something good on the tv!
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EW GURU
Latest post on 23 May 2013 - 15:08
Interesting that you say immigration would also advise sending her home. DHs work (HR and PRO) has now advised him not to fly her home but to cancel her visa and then let her have the 30 days to find something new. Funny how they don't seem concerned about the risk, but they have never had a problem with this approach so far. What I really don't get is how on earth you are meant to make sure they leave the country after the 30 days if they are no longer living with you. Of course DH now wants to do as his work suggests as he is that sort of guy, and also very trusting. I think he's also very uncomfortable with the idea of wrestling maid into car, into airport etc. He's a real softie and usually leaves the hard stuff to me (he has not got involved with talking to the maid at all about all this yet). Can anyone give me a number or website for immigration so I can see what they say. And yes its definitely suspicious that she's come back from sisters all smoochy, but only to the extent that she now wants something from us ie to stay in Dubai. She knows she has got to butter us up.
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EW GURU
Latest post on 23 May 2013 - 14:55
We are a suspicious, cynical bunch aren't we?! No idea if there's more to it or not. Don't see what she'd get out of it (unless it is a new job as you say). I would have to tell future employers the truth. So how she'd get a new job anyway I am not sure. DH has spoken to his work and they have told him to cancel her visa and let her find another job. He does not want to deport her.mNot sure how we can hedge the risks of that, other than by keeping her working at our villa so we can keep an eye on her.
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EW GURU
Latest post on 23 May 2013 - 13:43
Ok, point taken. I think she does deserve what she gets. She should not try and play her employer like this and may well present a risk to future employers. Her sisters will have to forward her stuff on for her I guess, as she doesn't have it here. And KH, that's exactly the point I was making. Firm and fair without compromising my beliefs. Contracts are standard. can we add details such as hours to them?
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EW GURU
Latest post on 23 May 2013 - 12:57
Birchy, when you put it like that (the risk of reprisals) it does not sound like a risk we can afford to take, nor should we for some one who has been rude, disrespectful and I think deceitful too. I/we have to stop being too nice (is there a cure?!). If we cancel her visa now can we still be fined? as I asked earlier, what is the difference to us of cancellign her visa now versus in a month? She would nto want to go elsewhere as most of her siblings are here (should have thought of that when she misbehaved though shouldnt she). I guess too that commenting positively on her work is not enough. A new employer really needs to be warned about her attitude, especially since she has now been dismissed twice in a row and has no previous reference either. what is to stop a maid coming back in a year and finding another job and lying about her expereience? she could say she had been in the Philippines and omit both jobs from here CV to get round the subject of bans/references couldnt she? or do the bans show up when a prospective employer tries to get a visa?
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EW GURU
Latest post on 23 May 2013 - 12:46
She did come back on time, so has been true to her word on that. Mind you, that may be because she is now after somethign else ie to stay and find another job rather than be sent home. All sweetness and light when she wants something (I got an apology and a hug) and a right stroppy c** when not getting her own way. Shouldnt she know better than to act like a spoilt brat at nearly 40?! Ive heard this sort of thing time and time again on EW and believe this sort of deviousness, insincerity and game playing is very common.
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EW GURU
Latest post on 23 May 2013 - 12:42
KH, my experience with this maid sounds very similar to what you describe with your first maid. I had cleaners and part time nannies in the UK too, and have treated our maid here similarly, though I have tried to keep my distance more. But she has had handouts (of things I was throwing out) and we have accomodated all her requests (or should I say demands). We have treated her as a human being, because that is how we are as people. We are all human and deserve to be treated as such. We are not going to abandon that principle going forward, but I think there are ways of being clear (from the start, in writing), tough and fair that would protect us from all this c*** in the future without having to turn into cold, heartless slave drivers. It is so sad though that accomodating behaviour like ours frequently seems to be abused rather than appreciated. You are right though, we are still trying to accomodate her. Is a ban for a year or 6 months? Does she deserve a ban when as far as we know she hasnt done anything really dreadful like steal or beat the children. She has behaved rudely and with disrespect, but that is hardly a criminal offence. You say you would not want to risk her playing up in your home before she finds a new employer. She wouldnt be here. The plan is to cancel the visa so she is not working here anymore and for her to stay with her sister. Presumably that will be considered a huge risk too as she is not under my nose being supervised. The alternative if we want to keep an eye on her is let her work here for a month and find a new job in that time. After a month we cancel her visa. She would be warned that if she dares to step out of line again we cancel her visa immediately. Thinking about her strange set up, ie the fact that she spends most of the weekend living out, has belongings at her sisters live out rooms etc, it occurs to me that she is not really a true live-in maid as it is understood in Dubai. It is debatable where she is living, part here (most of the time) and part there. Im not sure this is really on, or the way it is supposed to be. No wonder she wants all these conditions, she is acting much more like a live-out maid and I dont think her attitude or set up are suited to live-in work.
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EW GURU
Latest post on 23 May 2013 - 11:58
Sorry if I am being a bit dim (Can't think straight with the stress of all this!) but what does cancelling her visa actually do? It doesn't cancel our sponsorship, so what does it achieve exactly? I doubt we'll be able to do it today as DH (sponsor) has some documents with him and some here, but could do ASAP next week. But I don't want this situation hanging over us next week as we have friends coming from The Uk MOnday and I want us all to enjoy our time together which we won't if still dealing with this. Needs to be done and dusted.
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EW GURU
Latest post on 23 May 2013 - 10:58
Thanks, that's so sweet of you. Yes she was back before 7am. I texted her to tell her to bring her stuff from Satwa (for packing/flight) but she was already back! She now wants to stay to find another job instead of flying home. As she seems to be behaving responsibly we are considering it. DH is going to talk to the PRO at work about it. If we agree, how does that work? I am a little confused about when you cancel the visa? Is it a choice between doing it now and a new sponsor starting from scratch, or transfering at a later date? And what are the implications of these options (if I've even got it right that is!?). I understand we as sponsor are on the hook until she has a new sponsor or leaves the country. Does the visa cancellation have no impact on our responsibilities then?
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EW GURU
Latest post on 22 May 2013 - 21:41
Sorry for the silence - Been busy trying out keys to maids room etc. DH been in to her room and she certainly hasn't taken her belongings and even her laptop is still there. We don't think she'd have gone for good without it. Anyway, we will see tomorrow morning.
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EW GURU
Latest post on 22 May 2013 - 19:25
Its academic now anyway. You know that saying about horses and stable doors?! Now we will see if she comes back or not.....
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EW GURU
Latest post on 22 May 2013 - 19:08
Yes but can't believe she'd do a runner without her passport would,she?
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EW GURU
Latest post on 22 May 2013 - 19:00
Valuables in safe. As is her passport. Would she really abscond without passport? A lot of her stuff is in Satwa at her sisters, so she needs to collect and buy big enough suitcase to fit it all in.
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EW GURU
Latest post on 22 May 2013 - 18:19
Agree. But god only knows what! She is leaving to go to her sisters overnight. Is this a no no? We do have her passport though. Hear of absconding maids....