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habibti

habibti
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Latest post on 15 May 2012 - 08:07
Judging from all the replies against it, I realise it's a cultural thing ;) but I don't see any problem with it and, it's not permanent. If your DD decides when she's older, she can remove the earrings and the holes will grow closed. If DH doesn't agree with you though, I think you should wait and discuss it again when she's a little older.
habibti
88
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Latest post on 15 May 2012 - 08:02
Sometimes we go through phases where we grow apart from friends and a few years later, become closer again. Other times, we outgrow a friendship completely. If you've been feeling this way for a while and the friendship feels like constant hard work, or you feel like you want/have to avoid her, then it's best to move on. I recently asked an old friend (we've also known each other for 19yrs) if we could take a break but she reacted badly and said she'd prefer to end the friendship. I must admit that it's been something I wanted to do for the past 5yrs as she changed once I moved to Dubai - lots of snarky comments, sarcasm and b*tchiness about my life, all masked behind a giggle and a "I'm just kidding, hey". That, coupled with the melodrama she thrived on, made her a very high maintenance friend. I'm much happier now that I don't have to see all her updates, imagined dramas and cries for mass attention via BBM and FB. I'm glad that I was honest with her though.
habibti
88
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Latest post on 14 May 2012 - 21:49
DS @ 17mths: He is still BF and needed to be fed, then rocked to sleep and once down, he would sleep for 3hrs uninterrupted and then wake up every 1-2hrs from midnight and then be glued to the breast from 5am until I got up to get my other kids ready for school! I followed the same routine re dinner, bath and BF before bed. The difference is that I was living in CPT and DS cot was in my room as I didn't have a spare room for him to sleep alone. Night 1 1. Follow routine, BF, cuddle and put him down awake (with the lights off). 2. Tell him in firm, yet kind voice, that it's sleep time and that he needs to lie down 3. Leave room 4. 10mins later, he was still crying (And standing up in the cot) so I would go in, repeat that it's sleep time and he needs to lie down (this is my sleep mantra :) ) and then leave the room 5. I'd then wait for 20mins and then go in and say the same thing. By this time he was hysterical so I picked him up, cuddled and reassured him with the mantra and making "shush" sounds 6. He took about 1.5hrs before he fell asleep but then slept right through until 1am 7. When he woke up and cried for the BF, I never left my bed - only repeated the mantra and said "shush" and then I hid under the blankets while he cried for 1hr :( 8. He woke at 6am and I then fed him and we were up for the day Night 2 1. He cried for 40mins before bedtime 2. He woke up once at 5.45am - then BF and we started our day Night 3 1. We were onboard our flight back to Dubai (I've just moved back) and already I could see the difference. 2. I was busy rocking DD to sleep on my lap and when DH repeated the mantra, DS immediately put his head down on his dad's shoulder and lay there peacefully. Usually, that night flight means I am alternately rocking and BF DS for the full 9hrs just to get him to keep quiet! Night 4 1. First night back in Dubai, followed the routine and guess what...DS slept right through the night (13hrs)! All our subsequent nights for the past few weeks he has gone down OK but sometimes I have to go in once or twice just to remind him that I am still around - I repeat the mantra and give him a cuddle and then leave the room, even if he is moaning or crying. He also wakes up around 3am every night but I don't get up - I repeat the mantra and he goes back to sleep until 5.30/6-ish. The trick with CIO sleep training is being kind, firm and CONSISTENT. No matter how difficult it is hearing your child cry, you have to leave them to cry (as long as they're well, with a dry nappy and safe in the cot). The first couple nights are rough but it DOES work and I swear, it is life changing for both you AND baby. You know yourself and your child best - my paed said don't go in at all but some nights, when I hear that his cry is bordering on hysterical, I go in and give him that reassurance that mom is still around and he's safe and loved, but that it's sleep time. When you figure out how to wean him completely off the breast, please post about it as that is my next step! Falling pregnant with #4 and landing up in hospital with food poisoning is NOT an option this time....:\: ;)
habibti
88
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 14 May 2012 - 21:31
Phew, I thought I was the only one waking up every hour to BF a toddler ;) I'll tell you what I did with both DD and DS as my circumstances were different. What I can say without any doubt is that I wish I had sleep-trained my eldest DS - he is currently 8yrs old and still takes between 2-3hrs to fall sleep at night :( DD @ 13mths: She would wake up 3-4times between 8-11 and then again every hour thereafter. Her campcot was in my room and she was a very light sleeper. 1. Moved her cot to a separate room 2. Dinner at 5.45/6pm 3. Bath @ 6.30pm, followed by a massage in my room 4. Took her to greet dad, brother etc and then went to her room 5. Switched off all the lights and BF her while sitting upright (so no risk of me falling asleep with her still on the breast) 6. Put her down awake, greeted her and then left the room with the door closed behind me * Night 1 she cried for 40mins - she screamed and it was horrible but I never went in once. * She slept through until 4am - I let her cry but after 10mins went to BF her in her room for a few minutes and she then slept until 7am * Night 2 I followed the same routine and she cried for 15mins and then slept through until around 4am again. I let her cry but again went in to BF and she slept until 7.30ish * Night 3 she literally gave 1 "eh" moan and before I even left the room she was quiet and she slept until 4am. * To date she sleeps for 12-13hours and would nap for 3-4hours in the afternoon! (Although @ 3.5yrs she no longer wants to nap without a huge fight) * She continued to wake at 4am and I would always BF for 10mins. I didnt mind doing so because she would go right back to sleep for another few hours. I commuted to SA every 6wks and would do exactly the same when we got the house there, and upon return to DXB. By the time I had done the commute twice she knew the drill and would sleep in the same way in both our houses. Re weaning - when she was 17mths old I got food poisoning and landed up in hospital (I was 3mths pregnant and severely dehydrated). DD went to my mom and never asked for the breast that 1st night! Since I was hoping to wean her anyway, my mom kept her for 4nights and that was how I got her to stop BF (easy way out, I know!) :D HTH
habibti
88
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 14 May 2012 - 15:12
I love the NUK teats and prefer the silicone ones. You may need to try a few before she latches on to one that she likes. Avent also seems to be a popular choice.
habibti
88
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 14 May 2012 - 07:39
It's not Europe but what about South Africa? If you go north - Johannesburg and Mpumalanga- the weather will be mild during the day and cold early morning/nights, with no rain. Cape Town will be cold throughout the day with the possibility of lots of rain. Things to do in/around JNB: - Sun City which is 1.5hrs drive from JNB (huge resort with a waterpark, casino, theatre shows, movies, restaurants and games centres for kids). Good to stay for at least a couple days. - Gold Reef City in JNB (an amusement park for kids/adults) - Cultural Tours - Lion Park - Waterberg Area (malaria free area with lots of private game reserves) Mpumalanga - 1 of the most scenic provinces in SA - You could do a road trip from JNB and stop along the way at Pilgrim's Rest, and other gorgeous places (google the province for more info) - Kruger National Park (biggest game reserve) Since it is winter with no rainfall, the animals all have to go to the waterholes to drink, making it the ideal time of year for game viewing
habibti
88
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 12 May 2012 - 22:26
VISS takes kids from 2yrs - they're very close to Al Nahda and have a bus service (not sure whether it applies to younger kids though). All the info regarding fees, transport and curriculum are on their website. The curriculum is Autralian and not British.
habibti
88
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 10 May 2012 - 12:12
I'm Capetonion too and despite living here on/off for the past 5yrs, I would choose SA over the UAE without a second thought. Yes, the crime is bad but as another poster said, you have to be streetsmart and conscious of your belongings all the time - much like you would be anywhere else in the world (except perhaps the Middle East?) Pros - Gorgeous weather, 4 seasons, nature in her finest glory - the mountains, the ocean, the forests - excellent schools and accredited universities that aren't run like a business and where the focus is on the "whole child" and not just their profit - being able to drive anywhere, reaching your destination in 20mins max and not having been road-raged by 120+ other nationalities with their own driving "skills" - Living in a progressive city where you're not grouped by race/class/nationality - Affording your kids the opportunity to play outdoors, climb trees, partake in sports all year round - Affording your kids a more holistic upbringing where more time is spent doing outdoor activities, rather than spent in a mall or with the latest techno gadgets - Owning your own property (with huge gardens, and amazing views) and not paying through the nose for it - Reliable, affordable household help - You can open your windows for FRESH air and not require an AC 24/7 Cons - Crime - No 24hr little grocers delivering whatever you may need ;) - Less choice when it comes to brands (and less great sales where those brands are made more affordable) My R5's worth :) <em>edited by habibti on 10/05/2012</em>
habibti
88
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 08 May 2012 - 15:20
Male's not worth the trip in my opinion - really dodgy little hotels that are overpriced, and bad food that's also overpriced. I'd rather spend that money on an extra night on the resort island :) If it weren't for the little ones I would have liked to visit one of the smaller islands to support the locals and buy touristy things.
habibti
88
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 07 May 2012 - 22:30
I breastfed my toddler until I was 3mths pregnant - I never felt there was any risk to the unborn baby, nor was I discouraged from doing so by any of the doctors I saw - both here and back home. Unfortunately, I got food poisoning and ended up in hospital away from my toddler and that's how she was forced to wean herself at 17mths. If you're able to continue, I think it would be great especially since your baby is still quite young. Good luck!
habibti
88
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 07 May 2012 - 22:22
thanks, but that won't work for us either as we're in an apartment and cannot accommodate a family in the space we have.
habibti
88
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 07 May 2012 - 22:17
We were in BKK with 3 young kids, including a 6mth old and a toddler, during June last year and it was great - hot and humid but nowhere near as hot as here and definitely not unpleasant. It rained twice but for a short period during the afternoon. Mozzies weren't a problem in BKK but it may be elsewhere - can't comment on that because we only traveled to Chiang Mai and Phuket during February on a previous trip. I don't think the heat in ME countries can be compared to anywhere else ;)
habibti
88
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 06 May 2012 - 21:23
Thanks, BM :)
habibti
88
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 06 May 2012 - 21:21
Just my luck, moving back just as the weather starts heating up. I loathe summer weather here :( Is Biscuit Maker aka Banana Muffin (I haven't been on the forum in a long time ;)
habibti
88
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 06 May 2012 - 21:17
I've had 2 (both not in DXB though) - 1st one which was 8yrs ago lasted quite a long time post-birth but the last one was fantastic as I could move my legs during the labour (not walk, but stay on the bed and be able to move) and I could shower immediately after. Good luck!
habibti
88
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 06 May 2012 - 20:57
miniclub, i may be interested but need more info please. if she's here with her family, does that mean she will live-out ? or, does it mean she requires accommodation for all of them (e.g. outside quarters at sponsor's villa)? TIA
habibti
88
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 06 May 2012 - 08:52
Orchard, there are a number of books - you can google and I'm sure a few will come up. I never used a book but followed the advice of our paed and tweaked it to suit my family's needs. Here's what I did, bearing in mind I did this when both mine were older than 1yr: General "rules": 1. 1st take baby for a thorough check-up with paed to ensure their health is fine 2. Ensure that baby is eating enough, including protein, at each meal 3. Follow the same routine and be consistent (consistency is the key so that baby knows what to expect and is comforted by it) 4. If you're travelling, follow the same routine on the 1st night in your new destination, and upon your return. Night 1: - 5.30pm Dinner , playtime, 6.15pm bath and massage and then 6.45pm milk (I'm still BF my 17mth old) in the room where baby sleeps with the lights dimmed - Once baby has finished drinking, wind him, then put him down and tell him in a kind, firm voice that it's sleeping time and he needs to lie down. - Pat and shush for a minute until he settles and then leave the room and close the door - Baby might cry for an hour or more (I go in a couple times to pat, shush and reassure him. If he's really hysterical, I pick him up and hold until he's calmed down, then put him back down and leave the room. If you going in is making him more upset, you can leave him to cry for the hour without going in to pat him - this is dependent on you and how much you crying you can take. - Every time the baby wakes during the night, don't pick him up - say the same thing - ssshhh, it's sleeping time, lie down (or whatever your line will be when you want him to sleep) Night 2: Same as above with less visits to pat and shush, only baby should cry for shorter periods and wake less Night 3: Baby probably won't cry when you put him down and he should wake only once or not all Most books/docs will tell you it takes a week but it took 3days with both my kids. Expect a rough night 1 week later, but follow the same routine and he should then be entrenched in his new routine. The 1st couple nights are VERY tough. It's not easy hearing your baby cry, regardless of whether he is 7mths or 17mths. But, I think there comes a point when one is so sleep-deprived and on the brink of insanity, that sometimes we have to just do it - for both baby and our benefits. I cannot tell you the difference it has made in our lives - my toddler sleeps through until 6am these days :)
habibti
88
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 05 May 2012 - 14:10
Enid Blyton - Famous Five and Secret Seven series Horrid Henry Captain Underpants
habibti
88
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 05 May 2012 - 14:04
I replied on the baby forum but I see you've given more info on this thread. I know exactly how you feel and we work in the same industry so I know how hard it gets on hardly any sleep. For months and months I put off sleep training because: baby was snotty, baby was teething, i have 2 older kids I didn't want disturbed, I was too tired to deal with the crying, I had a huge event I was working on and just needed to get through that, other family in the house didn't approve of me letting baby cry, etc etc etc. I moved back to Dubai 2 weeks ago and started sleep training 3 nights before our flight. Best thing I have done - for both of us! DS, who used to wake EVERY 1-2hrs EVERY night (until 16mths!) now sleeps through. It is so worth it, I wish I had done it sooner.
habibti
88
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 05 May 2012 - 13:49
We use Dr Loubser but I'm not sure he's taking on extra patients - do a search on here and you will find numerous recommendations.
habibti
88
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 05 May 2012 - 13:46
I really feel for you, dibdub. Sleep deprivation is the worst :( Before you try a night nurse would you consider sleep training him? My DS, at 16mths, was still waking every 1-2hrs... EVERY night, and had never slept for longer than 4hours ever! I recently sleep trained him (CIO method with a few tweaks that made it easier for me/him) and it took 3 nights for him to sleep through. I tried a no-cry method, and patting ans shushing for hours on end but nothing else worked. I had the same problem with my older DD who would wake up every hour to BF until 13mths and once I sleep trained her (which took only 2 days) she slept for 13hrs straight and has continued to do so for the past 2yrs. Worth a try? Good luckm whatever you decide.
habibti
88
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 04 May 2012 - 23:05
When we joined, I fell pregnant a couple weeks later (not planned!) and although they didn't cover the birth and hospital stay, all my antenatal visits to the GP at the EK clinic were covered, including the 13 and 22 weeks scans at the foetal assessment centre, glucose and other blood tests, and the scheduled gynae appointments as per the EK maternity programme. Check with medical benefits because you may only need to pay for the actual time in hospital and costs relating to the actual birth, like we did (although I chose to go home for all my births).
habibti
88
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 29 April 2012 - 22:59
hey, im back too. wikkid, did you go back to SA? welcome back :)
habibti
88
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 25 April 2012 - 09:36
Maybe he's cutting molars that's painful and now prefers soft-textured food? Keep offering a variety and when he feels like it, he will eat it. Could also be that he's just going through a fussy phase. My DD (3) goes through phases where she only eats plain rice or breads for a couple days, to days when she only wants veg, etc to days when she happily eats a wide variety of healthy foods.
habibti
88
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 20 August 2011 - 23:30
Well done to the OP for pumping and offering expressed milk for 3mths! Im south african too and am a firm believer in the jungle juice when needed. My 3rd baby is 8mths old and also suffers from reflux. All 3 my kids were exclusively BF for long periods and this time round, i'm dealing with a rather hungry reflux baby who still fusses terribly at the breast and wakes up every couple hours through the night :( but I'm not ready to give up and switch to formula. Luckily he doesn't refuse the breast and at almost 9mths, the reflux has improved tremendously. I opted to give him natural TIBB meds from 2-4mths as I'm not keen on the alopathic meds and it never helped him much anyway. I have found with all 3 kids, that when I am very sleep-deprived I just don't produce a lot of milk despite feeding on demand. At these times - just 1 day (and 3l) of jungle juice and my supply is back to normal. I also take Brewers Yeast tablets to boost supply sometimes. These are also natural and help boost energy levels and combat stress. You can take 2 tablets up to 3xdaily or, on days when your supply is low, up to 6tabs 3x daily. Good luck and well done again. edited to add that dairy in my diet is a trigger for his reflux - when i cut it out/cut down considerably, his reflux improves. <em>edited by habibti on 20/08/2011</em>
habibti
88
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 10 May 2011 - 18:25
Aloe gel should offer relief - it's natural and works quite quickly
habibti
88
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 10 May 2011 - 18:19
I think it is a good few weeks, but you can go to the dr and get some tablets to dry up your milk supply, i think this makes them less painful! These are no longer recommended due to some pretty dangerous side-effects. I used to find that hand expressing in the shower to relieve the pressure helped. I'd just do enough until they weren't rock solid anymore and slowly wind down. Won't be long! Try some brufen :) agree with the handpumping in the shower. you can also use a hot water bottle/similar to ease the pain.
habibti
88
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 10 May 2011 - 18:16
If she's in the midst of it, then you're too late to distract - you have to kind fo head it off right at the start - preferably at the first signs. It's easier said than done, of course, and as they grow - at least if your DD is anything like mine - it gets more difficult because their needs/wants become more complex. Even with a strong-willed child, you have to teach them to be able to control their emotions and channel them in productive ways. There are no signs - anything can set her off, even when you think things are going really well. There is absolutely no warning and what pleases her today may well not do for her the next. I don't expect me 2yr old to control her emotions, she's only 2 after all. Anyway, the more I think about it the less worried I am. It does get frustrating at times but so do many other things in the motherhood journey :)
habibti
88
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 10 May 2011 - 18:08
plumie, how can you say us saffirs have been in the dark ages? :D I actually find that not everyone breastfeeds - some of my friends and acquaintances do, many don't because they can't or they just find it tiresome and an effort. A lot of people don't understand why it's so important to me and why I BF for so long. I think 1 of the reasons many Capetonions do is because a large part of the community is Muslim and breastfeeding until the age of 2yrs is strongly recommended in Islam. It is stated that every baby has the right to be breastfed until 2yrs - this information was part of our religion before the WHO discovered it :D We have many allergies and intolerances in the family so I delayed solids until 6mths with Kid1 - no issues starting solids, nor with allergies or appetite, etc. Kid 2 was BF for 17mths (at which time I was 3mths pregnant and was battling a bit) and started solids at 6mths - no issues either. But, Kid3 is bigger than his siblings and is a very hungry baby so I started solids at 21 wks (just before 5mths). Interestingly, my paed has told me about new research from the UK that is now recommending solids be started between 4-6mths (as opposed to the "start at 6mths" research of the last few years.) He said the reason for this is that many babies were found to have an iron deficiency at 4mths and that they needed supplements (preferably from solids) as BM doesn't provide it all at that age. Had Kid3 not been a hungry baby, I probably would have waited until 6mths. Having said that, I don't think there's a textbook rule for all babies. Some will be ready at 4mths, others a bit later. As long as we're not feeding earlier than 4mths, why beat ourselves up about what everyone else is doing or saying? :)
habibti
88
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 10 May 2011 - 17:49
Thanks for all the replies and to plumie for bumping :) W.r.t. how I listen and try to deal with it - tried it all. When she is in the midst of her tantrum, she doesn't hear or see me, regardless of what I am trying to say or how I am saying it - hence me saying she cannot be distracted. Aryanwynn - what you said has me intrigued and yes, I do feel blessed and often want to record her antics and facial expressions (but that wouldn't help the discipline, now would it? :D ) I will try and get the book since I am now back in SA permanently. Perhaps it's just a matter of trying to understand her personality and temperament and then riding out this phase.
habibti
88
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 14 March 2011 - 12:43
Sorry, I only checked this thread again today :D Meals, glad you're coping! No matter how tough, I've realised that we as moms are made for it, so we always pull through. Sqilli.... great to hear it's going well! Have you settled in Oz? Must be divine being back and luckily your older 2 can help with baby and DD4. Leshell - the flight was great! Surprisingly all 3 kids behaved so well. The older 2 have always been great onboard but thought they may act up since we hadn't flown in over 5mths. Hopefully the day flight back to SA is going to be as easy... ;)
habibti
88
Posts
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Latest post on 14 March 2011 - 10:44
I'll be back in late April and wouldn't mind bringing you a pack.
habibti
88
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 13 March 2011 - 08:38
I can't recommend a doctor but what I do is pat the area dry, ensuring there's no moisture at all, then sprinkle some powder on my fingers and rub it in the area/between the folds etc. Bactroban works great for that type of infection. I would keep the area clean and dry and give it another day or 2 before going back to the GP.
habibti
88
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 13 March 2011 - 08:35
Congratulations! And I love the name too. Enjoy your little bundle and take lots of time to rest :)
habibti
88
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Latest post on 09 March 2011 - 19:46
any updates on SZR?
habibti
88
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Latest post on 08 March 2011 - 10:39
You could do platters of: Cockail savouries - samoosas, pies, sausage rolls, pizzas, quiches Cold meats: Mini meatballs, cubes of cheese, cherry tomatoes, Smoked turkey rolled on toothpicks Dippers - hummus & crudities Cocktail rolls - slice open on the top and fill with various fillings (vienna with tomato sauce/mini sausage/egg mayo/tuna mayo/coldmeat & mayo/chicken mayo) and garnish with lettuce and cucumber slices Mini ciabattas - buy a long drumstick roll, cut into slices at an angle, drizzle with olive and sprinkle with chopped up garlic or a basil pesto and top with vegetarian toppings (grilled aubergine with balsamic red onions/zuccini and mushrooms/mozarella with tomato and basil/etc) and bake in the oven until crispy - a real hit with the adults! <em>edited by habibti on 08/03/2011</em>
habibti
88
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Latest post on 07 March 2011 - 23:26
shoo, meals. that sounds hectic! glad you and bubs are both ok. i had a prem labour scare at 32 wks and spent a few days in hospital but we managed to stop the labour. my boy was finally born at 38wks, despite everyone saying i wouldnt make it to 34wks :) what did LD have? i must admit, i missed you all (ok, correction.. not *all*) :D especially during the 1st 2mths of very bad reflux!
habibti
88
Posts
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Latest post on 06 March 2011 - 12:05
Some babies outgrow eczema so best to check what triggers it or if it's just infant dermatitus which goes away after a couple of months. Oilatum works really well as a moisturiser for my DD. At the end of her bath, I add 1 tbsp olive oil which is great to coat the skin and protect it from dryness. Remember to moisturise the entire body at every nap change when it's really bad. Rooibos tea added to the bath is fantastic, cheap and all natural.
 
 
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6 Annoying Things Expats Hate Hearing

6 Annoying Things Expats Hate Hearing

The Real Expat: Finding Your Anchor and True Belonging

The Real Expat: Finding Your Anchor and True Belonging