Hello.Again.Kitty | ExpatWoman.com
 

Hello.Again.Kitty

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Latest post on 05 July 2011 - 18:56
I agree with you HAK.... healthy dose of sceptism about all things official here and I'm no conspiracy nut either! as it stands I'm not planning to let DD have the chicken pox vaccine, she hasn't had Rotarix and I wouldn't let her have any flu vaccine either. v sad story here.... http://www.perthnow.com.au/news/western-australia/saba-button-the-girl-who-is-never-alone/story-e6frg13u-1226035296706 Well the Rotavirus vaccine has a bit of a scandal behind it's approval in the US anyway... apparently the chap who pushed it through (even though it's debatable whether it works well and/or is really necessary) apparently forgot to mention to the approval board that he held the rights to it... He must have been laughing all the way to the bank! There are cases of bad reactions to virtually any vaccine - they are, after all, often doses of the virus/disease we want to immunise against. That's why, imo, we have to weigh up the risks. It's a bit like the fact we don't all have our appendix out "to be on the safe side" because the operation itself carries risks, even though they may be small.
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Latest post on 05 July 2011 - 18:42
you shouldn't have any issues at all. The great thing is that you can feed whenever, so do so at take-off and decent and you won't have any issues with the pressure in bubs' ears... what's even better is that it'll just look as if you're cuddling your baby so people may stop and chat to you whilst waiting for the loo without even realising you're feeding (I used to do so without any kind of cover/poncho thing). Flights were one of the moments when I was sooooo happy to be breastfeeding as opposed to having to lug around. test and worry about a supply of formula!
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Latest post on 05 July 2011 - 18:32
I believe the rules on CB are being changed and unless you are ordinarily resident (ie not with a residency visa in the UAE) you should not be allowed to claim, again sorry to mislead, and to go off thread! no, the changes seem to suggest that you can be ordinarily resident in more than one country, so having a UAE residence visa does NOT mean that you can't also be ordinarily resident in the UK... they seem to be defining "ordinarily resident" increasingly on how long you stay in the UK, how often you visit, whether you have family and/or a home in the UK, etc... This obviously goes hand in hand with gearing up to catch expat salaries to tax.
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Latest post on 05 July 2011 - 13:46
DH's dad had CP when DH was newborn and wasn't allowed contact. You're the mum, so it's not much of an option, but take care of yourself and watch your babies for symptoms - which should pop up in about 10 days. If they do show any, then consult a Dr straight away and watch them like a hawk (which you would do anyway).
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Latest post on 05 July 2011 - 13:44
I flew back at 28 weeks and came back when DS was 3 months old, but that was simply because of timing and circumstance - DS was due at the end of June and so I was never going to return to Dubai in the middle of summer with a newborn and 2 year old to sit in my apartment on my own all day long! I also flew back at 28 weeks because in my 1st pg, I had some swelling and didn't want to risk being refused my fit-to-fly certificate.
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Latest post on 05 July 2011 - 13:41
If we had a nanny/housemaid I would consider getting her tested for a few things from time to time just to be on the safe side. |But anyone actually working here would have been screened as part of their visa process... and if found to be infected, they'd have their visa refused and would be deported. [i'>That's [/i'>why I am not convinced about quite how much exposure (if any really) my children would get to a contagious TB carrier. Pentel, yes, I completely agree that the figures may be a bit optimistic, but that's what has been published and that's what the rest of the world bases its recommendations on... being sceptical about any published stats here is pretty healthy imo, but we can't completely dismiss them.
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Latest post on 05 July 2011 - 13:32
hehe - sleeping through the night, as in "I don't hear a peep out of you from the time I put you to bed to the time you wake me up in the morning"... 9 months for DD and 11 months for DS. Bedtime is at 19h and decent wake up time is anything from 6h30... Anything short of that isn't "sleeping through" in my books... there are no prizes for just "sleeping at night" although even that can take a while! lol And counting from their first night feed also doesn't count, because that 22h/23h til 3h-4h only constitutes a 3h sleep slot for me! <em>edited by Hello.Again.Kitty on 05/07/2011</em>
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Latest post on 04 July 2011 - 02:16
However I decided it's best for them to have BCG as recomended by my midwife in the UK, she told me India has a very high TB rate so it's best to give it to babies living in London!! A London-based friend told me they'd recently stopped giving it in London too. We're on the South Coast and they haven't done it here for ages. Strange world really. As for Dubai, I just think that the likelihood of my kids coming into close enough contact with a TB-infected tourist are incredibly slim. If we were going to a higher risk area, I would have them done.
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Latest post on 04 July 2011 - 01:15
bump for the TB vaccine thread!
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Latest post on 04 July 2011 - 01:13
I posted a whole load of links on this on another vaccination thread. Basically, the BCG isn't needed for travelling to Dubai, nor staying in Dubai and the UAE has one of the lowest TB rates in the world (according to WHO - something like 4.5 per 100,000, whereas the UK (where the BCG isn't compulsory in all areas) still has something like 14 per 100,000). Vaccination is a very personal decision and I think we all need to be realistic and weigh up the risks of either having it or not having it... and also to question if such-and-such is really necessary. I would be interested to hear exactly why your paed deems it necessary, given the verified figures. "Playing it safe" (when there is a very low risk anyway), imo, isn't a worthwhile enough reason to pump my kids (or myself) full of stuff. Neither of my two have had the BCG (but they have had all the UK recommended vaccinations on schedule - so not Rotavirus, CP, Hep A).
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Latest post on 04 July 2011 - 01:00
did you know that superglue was invented to stick wounds back together during the Vietnam war? Not exactly helpful to your current predicament, but interesting... sort of!
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Latest post on 03 July 2011 - 16:56
thanks Hello Kitty :) Yes I do think I'm lucky and should just go with the flow...it's easy to question yourself though when you read books or pay too much attention to what you think you "should" be doing. :) The Baby Whisperer says you shouldnt let them nap for more than 1 and a half to 2 hours during the day...well I finally got him down for a nap at 11 this morning and he's still asleep now...no way am I waking him up! I got a good few good tips from the Baby Whisperer, but also my biggest hang-ups - namely that DD was a "snacker" and that she wasn't feeding properly because of it. Of course, I took it to heart, because it was written in a book and it took my health visitor to say "just take a moment to look at your baby [stares at Miss Michelin with her 3 elbows and hidden knees'>... she's quite obviously getting enough milk!". I can't have read as far as the nap bit because DD slept so much, my NCT buddies wondered if she ever opened her eyes and had I done so, I'm sure I would have worried about that too. My son has always had 2-3 hour naps (even now, at 2 years old, he has one for 2-3 hours) and it has never affected his night-time sleep, unless he sleeps in late afternoon, which basically I never let happen. Read the books/ forums, take from them any top tips that fit in with you and your baby and forget the rest. There's no right or wrong way to do things, so the idea of conforming to one single person's ideal (who doesn't even know you and your baby exist) is just a bit weird imo!
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Latest post on 03 July 2011 - 13:38
thanks nutty and julz. The past 2 nights I haven't done it and he went down to sleep about 8pm. One night woke at 2am, feed and change back to sleep by 3am, slept until 7am. Last night he woke himself up with a big poo LOL at 1am, fed and change and then slept until 5am, then back to bed until 7.30am. Still so unsure if I should perservere with trying to dreamfeed or not as he does quite well in that first stretch on his own....hmmm!! I think you've answered your own question! Don't knock it, don't worry about it and enjoy! As time goes on, your son will push his feeds back, so probably in the next couple of months, he'll do his 1h-2h feed at 3h-4h and will drop his 5h30 feed. I would just like to point out though that I am officially jealous. Your son is 7 weeks old - mine was following the pattern you described (oh, but yes, with another feed at 3h!) at ELEVEN MONTHS. [b'>That's[/b'> why I keep saying "don't question it, just enjoy!" ;)
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Latest post on 03 July 2011 - 13:31
Aww, bless you! I can remember being so anxious about everything, but you gradually learn to relax and just trust your instinct and your body... and your baby. They're all so different. Kiwispers posted a truly fabulous post on the "why can't breastfeeding be easy" thread which is absolutely bottom line true. Meals is also right - try to just go with the flow and relax. The wind is one thing that's not nice to have to witness, but apart from that, try to just enjoy your baby rather than stressing about some graph some dude drew up based on an average of babies. Lastly - ditch the whey drinks. You're not body-building and tbh, I can't think of anything less fun to eat/drink. Try chocolate instead. Yes, honestly! Apparently there's no correlation between the intake of calories the mum has and what comes out in your milk, but (purely not scientifically) I'm not so sure. One of my friends' babies used to be quite whingy at the end of any day where she tried to eat "healthily" (ie no cake), so she just continued eating cake and he was happy (and had no problem with weight gain, but that's mainly to do with his huge Scottish father!). Another took to eating a big bar of Dairy Milk every day and her son was hugging the 98th (and still is!). I'm another one not to hold back on a balanced diet (that would be carrot cake then!) and have never had any issues... but then again, I have never really worried or analysed. Don't forget that a lot (if not "most") of weight gain and general size is down to genetics, so if you're slim and petite and your husband is slim, then you're highly unlikely to ever have a sumo baby, regardless of what you do. Just try and eat a healthy, balanced diet. If you usually buy low-fat/lite products, replace them for the time being with the full-fat versions. Drink lots of water, eat lots of fruit and veg, as well as red meats and/or protein, fish (all those oils) and nuts and whatnot... basically, follow your body's cues to appetite and thirst and trust it. Learn your baby's cues for the same thing and feed him/her whenever s/he asks to be fed. If you notice that bubs is making weird slurping noises or doesn't seem settled on the breast (you should be looking for really deep sucks and gulps) and/or you are uncomfortable when bubs is latched on, it could be that s/he's not latching properly, so either review that yourself or consult a specialist. Good luck!
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Latest post on 02 July 2011 - 19:51
there's Core Studio at the bottom of Damac Waves, which is a 2 minute walk on the Marina side from the JLT metro stop.
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Latest post on 02 July 2011 - 19:50
I've seen people take them in to the cabin, but I don't think all of them can actually be used on the airplane seats. [b'>It seems strange to have to pay to check them in, unless they're over your baggage allowance - they're just extra luggage after all.[/b'> They will be in addition to the checked baggage. I just assumed that they would allow us to check in the car seat for free alongside our usual baggage seeing as it was a safety thing. Guess not :( What a pain! 2x 18kg car seats eating up all the baggage allowance. that would explain why then - it's quite a hefty amount and they need to tally up the baggage weight. We took a car-seat boxed back to Dubai with us as luggage, but fortunately it is/was relatively light and we never get up to our limit anyway.
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Latest post on 02 July 2011 - 19:46
Oh, I thought they were only going to means test Child Tax Credits. Oh well, that at least will catch up on those who have been claiming fraudulently - it'll be interesting for them to have to fill in the form stating their salary and home address!
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Latest post on 02 July 2011 - 13:04
I've seen people take them in to the cabin, but I don't think all of them can actually be used on the airplane seats. It seems strange to have to pay to check them in, unless they're over your baggage allowance - they're just extra luggage after all.
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Latest post on 02 July 2011 - 12:58
I have absolutely no intention to claim child benefit here in Dubai, personally I think it's wrong if I am out of the country and I really don't 'need' it, I believe it should be means tested in the uk (shoot me if you wish) perhaps this is why the uk benefit system is collapsing? I am aware that some Dubai resident claim it and my message to them is why? Are we not all financially comfortable living our expat life, no wonder there will be no state pensions for those of us why have paid our taxes when we were in the country, it's a sad state if affairs in my own opinion. I agree completely about the means testing too! They've brought that in for the Tax Credits anyway now (or very soon) and shut down the one-off benefits you used to get (which imo were excessive anyway, even if they were nice!). Anyhow, it's now completely clear from my posting below that if you are not in the UK, even temporarily, you should not be claiming benefit - and consequently, if you are, you are doing so illegally and are liable to paying it all back when they find out.
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Latest post on 02 July 2011 - 00:57
well, you will sleep again, just maybe not tonight... or maybe tomorrow he'll sleep through. Who knows. It's difficult, but it's part and parcel of having a baby. My son woke every 2 hours from midnight every night until he was 11 months old... could have certainly been better... could have been worse! Anyhow, have you started yours on solids yet? If not, you may see this as a sign to do so.
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Latest post on 02 July 2011 - 00:40
For some time there's been something called "dual occupation" which you can qualify for in certain circumstances if you have two homes... How come the Child Benefit are still sending you forms ? Have you been able to claim whilst away ? I've just got back to the UK and found they'd sent me the form and leaflet to claim again - rather keen of them! It all stems from when I went back to the UK to have my son and ended up staying for 6 months, claimed child benefit during that time and shut it down when I came back to Dubai... but by then I was already established as being ordinarily resident in the UK and still am really... But no, I don't claim while I'm away - the rules are very clear and you've got to play fair.
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Latest post on 02 July 2011 - 00:31
So if I have a house in the UK but have residency in the UAE I can claim? Does having residency in the UAE mean I have left permanently (even though I may go back to live at some point)? From what I can gather, having residency in another country doesn't discount you from claiming, as long as you fulfil the other criteria, namely that you are present in the UK, that you are ordinarily resident and that you obviously have the right to reside. It's good that they've laid it out straight though - basically, you have to be IN the UK to claim, so even if you have a house in the UK and visit often, if you're sitting happily in Dubai with Child Benefit coming in, then you'd be committing benefit fraud because not only do you have to be present in the UK but also you have to inform them if you are leaving, even temporarily. However, if you are a Dubai resident (like I am) but also have a house in the UK and spend large amounts of time in the UK every year, it would appear that you are considered to be ordinarily resident and so yes, you can claim for the time that you spend in the UK... you just have to tell them when you're leaving again. The other thing to bear in mind though is the UK tax implications. The only way we're not taxed on our expat earnings is when we are permanently AND ordinarily resident abroad. You cannot claim to be permanently resident abroad and also ordinarily resident in the UK, so if you do have a tax liability, it would be wise not to undermine your status! That's how I read it at least!
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Latest post on 01 July 2011 - 22:29
there's very little to compare really - I'd say the UK (of course, depending on where you live) is leagues ahead of Dubai. I love the rough and readiness here - there's such a vast number of options (we're in a town, very close to a city, the sea, the countryside and all kinds, so are really lucky) ranging from parks and playgrounds and children's adventure parks, to lessons and courses, but also the farms, walks, bike rides, pick-your-own fruit farms, steam trains, jumping in puddles and of course playing in the garden. Much, much freer, I feel, at least. As for the Dr and/or paediatrician, you'll be entered into the system and will see GPs in the practice closest to your home. A specific paediatrician isn't really the done thing here because the care of your child/ren is by the GP and the Health Visitor team.
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Latest post on 30 June 2011 - 11:21
My health visitor told me that as long as night-time is sorted, there's no need to worry about day-time naps because the children shift and drop them anyway. Your baby obviously knows how to fall asleep on her own (as proved at night) so maybe the daytime naps just aren't at the right time for her any more and she's actually not sleepy. maybe she wants to drop a nap... If she doesn't want to nap, get her back up and let her play for another 30 mins or an hour and then try again.
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Latest post on 30 June 2011 - 11:17
One point of advice though. A family moved from Dubai to Twickenham last year and the daughter joined the school my best friend's daughter attended. Apparently the mum complained constantly about the size of the houses (too small), lack of help (used to a live in maid etc) and was quickly ostracised by the other mums (having met a few it would be fair to say they are a scary bunch!). So just get yourself staffed up but do it quietly!!! Yes, I was thinking the same thing... a live-in helper is [i'>very[/i'> unusual especially out of London... and the further north you go, the less money people have (in general, of course), but they make do and just carry on. What with the reputation of Dubai (rich expats rolling in gold...) and then your potential domestic help, some people will invariably think you're putting on airs and graces, playing at lady of the manor, looking down on them, etc... Not fair, nor true, maybe, but that's life.
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Latest post on 30 June 2011 - 08:31
Thanks v much Ladies and especially HAK for the links and factual info. I have talked about it with some friends and family too and everyone seems to have different opinions - this is too confusing! I think you are right: I will do some more research and have to make my own decision. The paed did not want to advise one way or the other, she just said it is up to me. The one I think I will definitely rule out is MMR - have a case of autism in my family and have already decided not to take the risk. Too bad to read about TB in Dubai only now - LO had a huge reaction on his arm and has been carrying a massive lump filled with pus (which a nurse emptied and taken the capsule out twice for us) for 6 weeks. Luckily it is dying out now but I just hope it does not leave him a large scar. If you're going to skip the combined MMR, just do get the separate M, M and R vaccines. All those illnesses are making a reappearance and can have major repercussions (like infertility). I think the autism link has been pretty much debunked, but again, if you're not comfortable with what you feel is a risk, then no one can question your decision.
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Latest post on 30 June 2011 - 08:26
have a look on yell.com for cleaning services - I think the going rate is about £10-12/h at the moment. http://www.childcare.co.uk/ is a really great site for childcare options. If you register then a few people will actually contact you, but it's based on post-code, so you kind of need to know where you're going to live first. Fully qualified childminders charge between £4.50 and £7.50/h depending on location. Don't look to a babysitter for long-term care - she's not qualified, not experienced and babysitters generally are teens who do it for a bit of money on the side. Childminders also offer a baby-sitting service. If you go down the nanny route (a proper nanny), then expect to pay upwards of £20k/ year. Be prepared to change your mindset about domestic help - you simply won't get the live-in maid scenario you do here, unless you bring your own, but if you do, you will stick out like a sore thumb. Relatively few people even have a cleaner in for a couple of hours a week (I did - for 1 hour a week - and I was the only one in my group of [middle class'> friends!)... so good luck. I'm sure you'll be fine.
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Latest post on 29 June 2011 - 20:56
well, they check for glucose in your urine too at every apt, so ask them if it's showing any signs. Personally, if this is your 3rd with no prior symptoms,I wouldn't (wasn't even tested for my 2 pgs), but that's just me.
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Latest post on 29 June 2011 - 20:52
I think I realise that no matter what preparation you do ....... if you have a low tolerance for pain then you're going to need an epidural unless you can mentally train your mind to believe that it is not pain but some other process taking place. edited by Natashak on 29/06/2011 Not really. It hurts a lot.. but it isnt so bad that u cant bear it. Believe me, when i say zero or minus pain tolerance for me.. and if I can pop without an epidural, anyone can! Read up a lot.. it really does help. Get a doula if u can.. lifesaving women I tell u! :) Good luck with your delivery :) I actually don't think that normal trauma-pain tolerance has anything much to do with it, mainly because the sensations involved are so very different (and not something you can compare), but also because everyone is just so different. I couldn't say what my "pain threshold" is... certainly breaking my ankle was far more painful than giving birth to 3.9kg of baby! Really try to get your head around the not-trauma-pain thing, because it's true. In between contractions, you won't feel a thing (I was pretty much having a good old chat and then going silent through a contraction, gritting my teeth and concentrating and then once it was over, resuming where I'd left off...) and then literally ALL the "pain" goes away the moment your baby is born. It's so very strange, because seconds before, you feel like your body is trying to turn itself inside out (my experience, at least) and then hop! All done. Huge relief. Beaming grin! Also, I was just thinking about this... birth plans. So many people I know have had less than perfect birth experiences because their labour and delivery "didn't go to plan" and have had subsequent regrets, guilt, and other nasty things. Cut back to basics. The Plan is to get the baby out safely and preferably as easily as possible. That's it really. All the rest is just detail and preferences. Don't get het up about any of the details - just make your preferences clear and be informed about how you may have to change them in x, y or z scenario. Be at peace with it - it's not rocket science. If you're constipated, you don't make a big Plan for it, do you - you may take some pills if you feel the need (or may knock back the prune juice instead... or not), take a selection of books or magazines, choose your spot and resign yourself to the task in hand - it's going to happen one way or another! ;)
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Latest post on 29 June 2011 - 20:03
I've got 2 and both were natural, no epidural and the second was actually just on paracetamol! I'm not some nutty Earth-Mother or chanting hippy, but please believe me when I say that I think the secret is to understand that the pain isn't trauma-pain (like the pain you get if the burn yourself or break a leg) but it's exercise-pain (like the "pain" you get from a really hard work-out). There's absolutely no reason to fear it... in fact, the key is not to fear it, but to go with it - understand that your body is trying to do something, understand how it wants to do it and above all LET IT GET ON WITH IT without letting your mind get in the way. I've never run a marathon, but I think that it almost comes close - the physical exertion, yourself willing your body on, the awareness of your muscles and the end goal and then finally the euphoria of getting there. I can hardly put in words how I felt giving birth to my second, but it was amazing... just the heightened awareness, the focus and the euphoria... almost a bit of an epiphany. Read about Hypnobirthing too. Some bits are a bit "out-there", but in essence it's about changing your mindset from one that is focussing on negativity ("agony", "preparing for the worst", "pain", "if I can't stand it any longer", etc...) to one where to become in control of the process and through that, you lose your fear of it (because all the negativity has actually made us dread childbirth to varying degrees). You retrain your brain to think of childbirth as just another bodily function, that it actually knows what to do and basically that you can do it. Be prepared for different scenarios too. There's no "worst case" as a birthing process because they all end up with you giving birth. Water birth? All-fours? On your back on the bed? Whatever works best for you - it doesn't matter what your mum/ sister/ friend/ random forum bod did or what your Ob/Gyn is more comfortable with - they're not the ones pushing your baby out, so it's up to you. Epidural? Yes, if [i'>you[/i'> choose that it's the right thing for [i'>you[/i'> at that time. C-section? Yes, if that's what is needed. There's no failure. There are no medals for x, y or z because it's not a competition - it's all about [i'>you[/i'> and you alone.
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Latest post on 29 June 2011 - 19:26
the whole "they're not used to it/ don't know about it" thing doesn't wash with me either. Seatbelts in the backs of cars were only made law in the UK about 25 years ago, and even then, children's car-seats were pretty much unheard of... BUT things change. Technology changes.... and you keep up. 25 years ago we didn't have mobile phones or the internet, but we've somehow managed to get our brains around those concepts! I sway between feeling really passionate about it and wanting to help make a change and feeling complete apathy towards those who have such wilful disregard for their children's lives - go on then, endanger your child's life because it's more convenient for you. Darwinism in action. :(
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Latest post on 29 June 2011 - 15:57
ask them to do the first test or skip it altogether (after discussion about your personal situation with your OB/Gyn). I know it's routine here, but not in the UK unless you're already presenting signs or have had a previous pregnancy with issues. It's quite a trauma to put your pregnant body through really if you're not really at risk.
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Latest post on 29 June 2011 - 15:54
I don't think we could hold being Irish against you! ;) Please have a look on the "breastfeeding support in the UAE" thread and contact any organisations that tickle your fancy. Unfortunately most of the peer support coffee mornings have dried up because no-one has volunteered to host, so if that floats your boat, then it'd be most welcome!
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Latest post on 29 June 2011 - 15:51
Couldn't believe it when I saw those comments too... so just had to respond! I once saw a horrid/brilliant safety awareness ad for exactly this - holding bubs on the mum's lap in the back seat. You saw dad driving with mum cooing at baby on her lap in the back seat - both parents really as happy as could be, beautiful day out, no traffic on the country road... idyllic. Anyhow, they turn a corner and there's an obstacle or something, so dad has to do an emergency stop and in slow motion, you see mum and dad being restrained by their seat-belts whilst baby, very graphically shoots past dad's head and crashes against the windscreen, leaving a good smear of blood. The ad then cuts to the hospital, where dad is looking through the rooms' window where his wife is sat, turned away from the camera, rocking back and forth clutching... a towel, as if it were her baby.
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Latest post on 28 June 2011 - 18:10
not quite the same, but similar (SAHM)... "[chuckle and big smile'> What don't I do?!" "I've never been so busy!" and my favourite (which is true) "I sometimes wish I was back at work... for a rest!"
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Latest post on 28 June 2011 - 17:48
my son hasn't seen a paediatrician in all his time here... just a GP on occasion and A&E even more rarely (thankfully!) I'm following the UK vaccination plan too, as it is a basic one that covers all bases but doesn't overdo it (one perk of government-funded healthcare - they concentrate on what isn't a waste of time and money!). For example, in the UK they don't do the Rotavirus one (there's a fundamental conflict of interest behind it being approved in the US anyway), nor Chicken Pox (it doesn't stop the child getting CP). The BCG is now no longer a requirement in most parts of the UK (although a friend said it's no longer required anywhere in the UK now) and it's definitely not a requirement for coming to Dubai, because Dubai is a low-risk TB area (anyone with TB is kicked out after their visa medical)... same with Hep A, which is transmitted by bodily fluids. The Hep A & B vaccines are generally given in Europe at around 12 years old, before the child is, er, likely to start exchanging bodily fluids! Anyway, at the end of the day, it's all about what you feel is best and what you feel comfortable with. Do your research thoroughly and decide what [i'>you[/i'> want to do. I am sorry but what you are saying is incorrect. My DD was given Hep B vaccine when she 2 months old and she was born in Western Europe. As for BCG, it is recommended to be given in this part of the world...To the OP, please find yourself a good pediatrician and get his/her advice regarding your child's vaccination as they are the professional ones to give you the best answer..As for other vaccines like HEP A and Meningitis, they are prevalent in the middle east and by the way, HEP A can be contracted from water and food, not bodily fluids ( ie HEP B) as the other poster said..please seek a professional's advice before making any decisions regarding the health of your baby.. Well, Hep B was given to me in France when I was 12 and is given in the UK at University age, so I'm only going on what I know. As for the BCG, again, my healthcare professional sought advice and informed me that it was not needed to go to Dubai. This is the current UK programme and I've done it all, including the MMR, because I do think that one important, as Measles Mumps and Rubella are reappearing in UK schools partly due to so many people opting out. - 8 weeks: DTap/ IPV/ Hib & PCV (Diptheria, Tetanus, acellular Pertussis [whooping cough'>, Polio, Haemophilus Influenzae b and Pneumococcal) - 12 weeks DTap/ IPV/ Hib and Men C (Meningococcal C) - 16 weeks DTap/ IPV/ Hib/ PCV and Men - 12 months Hib/ Men C - 13 months MMR and PCV (Measles, Mumps, Rubella) 3-5 years DTaP/ IPV or dTaP/ IPV (pre-school booster) 3-5 years MMR 14 years dT/ IPV ---- This is the [url=http://www.nhs.uk/Planners/vaccinations/Pages/childvaccines.aspx'>link to NHS guidance[/url'> on childhood immunisations ... and interestingly gives guidance on when/if the CP vaccine, BCG vaccine and others may be recommended I've also had a little look and the sites I've tried (NHS, Travel-turtle...) haven't mentioned needing the BCG for travel (even long-term travel) in Dubai . According to several sources, Dubai has amongst the lowest incidence of tuberculosis in the world [url=http://healthfirstmagazine.com/issue/current/article/news-in-brief1'>article[/url'> // [url=http://www.arabstats.org/country.asp?cid=21&ind=305'>UAE stats per 100,000 - UK apparently registered 14.5/100,000 in 2010[/url'> // [url=http://www.hpa.org.uk/web/HPAweb&HPAwebStandard/HPAweb_C/1195733837507'>WHO comparison chart for 2009... nb, scroll down to the bottom![/url'> -------- I hope this helps. I think it's just about weighing up the risks involved (either by vaccinating or by not vaccinating) by carrying out informed and balanced research. <em>edited by Hello.Again.Kitty on 28/06/2011</em>
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Latest post on 28 June 2011 - 17:10
It's doable - even without a maid [shock horror'> The great thing is that after surviving taking both shopping, you'll wonder why you ever thought that only taking one was hard... and will think it a huge break/ walk in the park when you do only have one! lol Mine are 21 months apart, by the way and I don't have home help. There are several things that I found that helped no end: - make peace with the fact that your life will be non-stop and at various levels of semi-controlled chaos. Allow for flexibility, don't get het up if it doesn't go to plan and don't worry if #2 is just tagging along. - crack a routine that suits you and stick by it, for me, mealtimes and bedtime were set in stone, everything else was flexible... but bedtime especially was completely non-negotiable! Then, once they're in bed, RELAX and have "you time". The ironing can wait... pretty much until the next wash! lol - get your eldest adjusted to any changes before the birth... ideally by a couple of months before the birth. - when bubs is born, don't be afraid to let #1 play with them (under supervision). Maybe record "Get off him/her!", "Stop that now!" and "Don't pull/poke his/her head!" to be played on loop for the foreseeable future! - when feeding your newborn, don't exclude your toddler. I found it to be quite a difficult moment because #1 would invariably decide she wanted attention, right when I was least able to give her a big cuddle, so instead, I would sit her next to me and devote all my attention to her, whilst still feeding #2. - Be open and answer any questions they may have about you giving birth, feeding bubs or bubs him/herself. #1 will be very curious and I think a key thing to diffuse the potential jealousy is to make sure they feel important, loved, included and informed about the whole kaboodle. Holidays are fine. To be honest, the toddler/newborn combo is quite easy in comparison to toddler/ mobile baby (nightmare)... and then it gets easier when you get to pre-schooler/ toddler. You'll be fine! Plus, an extra bonus is that you'll get a nice toned figure relatively quickly - lugging two little'uns around will burn the baby weight off like nobody's business! <em>edited by Hello.Again.Kitty on 28/06/2011</em>
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Latest post on 28 June 2011 - 16:36
i know a lovely guy who i use regularly for gifts and artwork (had my name in arabic on amazing canvas) and also had this done as gifts - they go down a treat. if you can post your email i will send through to you. another one for your mailing list please! hello.kittydxb aT gmail. d0t com would be much appreciated!
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Latest post on 27 June 2011 - 18:28
They do, and half the time they don't know they're doing it and that's what's really wound me up. OK, I'm not the tenant in this case but I've been used to screw more money out of the tenant and it stinks. Of course a sensible landlord would build maintenance costs and suchlike into rent, but at least if the tenant knows the landlord pays all the fees and is therefore likely to do so, the playing field is a little bit fairer. Absolutely. I guess the worst thing about all this is that you weren't made aware at the start that you had to pay fees too and that the rent would be inflated to cover that. At the end of the day, as long as the tenant has to pay fees based on a percentage of the rent, that is determined by those who benefit the most out of increasing the rent, then they (we) will be shafted.
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Latest post on 27 June 2011 - 18:07
my son hasn't seen a paediatrician in all his time here... just a GP on occasion and A&E even more rarely (thankfully!) I'm following the UK vaccination plan too, as it is a basic one that covers all bases but doesn't overdo it (one perk of government-funded healthcare - they concentrate on what isn't a waste of time and money!). For example, in the UK they don't do the Rotavirus one (there's a fundamental conflict of interest behind it being approved in the US anyway), nor Chicken Pox (it doesn't stop the child getting CP). The BCG is now no longer a requirement in most parts of the UK (although a friend said it's no longer required anywhere in the UK now) and it's definitely not a requirement for coming to Dubai, because Dubai is a low-risk TB area (anyone with TB is kicked out after their visa medical)... same with Hep A, which is transmitted by bodily fluids. The Hep A & B vaccines are generally given in Europe at around 12 years old, before the child is, er, likely to start exchanging bodily fluids! Anyway, at the end of the day, it's all about what you feel is best and what you feel comfortable with. Do your research thoroughly and decide what [i'>you[/i'> want to do.
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Latest post on 27 June 2011 - 17:58
data protection ftw! :( ... and they want us to think they'll store our fingerprints securely! lolzzzz
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Latest post on 27 June 2011 - 17:56
H.A.K, it's not transparent and they're not presenting the deal honestly to both parties. That's why it's a scam.I agree that landlords should be forking out agency fees as they do in other countries, but in this situation the tenant ends up forking out twice and the agents are simply not being honest about this. If they rocked up and said, "Hi, I'm agent so-and-so from such-and-such, I'll be charging you a 5 per cent agency fee then you'll be paying a further 5 per cent in the rental so your commission will be 10 per cent" then the tenant would have a choice about whether they went with that agency or not. As it is, the second fee is being hidden - and sneakily so - and it's not fair on the tenant. Perhaps it would be a better idea to have landlords pay all commission then rents would be adjusted accordingly and there'd be no opportunity for agents to cream off the top through tenants. . Absolutely agree with the latter. My point is that the tenants pay for everything, directly or indirectly... same with the maintenance fees - yes, the LL pays for them, but he'd be a fool not to recoup the cost from the rent... but that's still pretty fair. I've found most agents here to be complete jackals (sorry nice agents!) who are more than willing to take your money and waste your time in exchange for very little service.
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Latest post on 27 June 2011 - 14:10
Tell him he should have thought of that when he had his night of fun! Or ask him how he thinks families survive where both parents work... goodness me, some people! Anyhow, you don't have to be passive-aggressive to deal with your MiL - if you don't want to be like her (good thing!), then don't. Be yourself - show [i'>your[/i'> strength. You'll be fine!
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Latest post on 27 June 2011 - 14:00
when we first arrived here amongst the big boom in rents, we had a huge eye-opening session with regards to commissions and whatnot. What you describe, DC, isn't at all surprising and in relative terms quite "above board" in comparison to our experience! Basically, the agents (#1) we paid our commission to found us a property at 190k (at the time), however, the LL pulled out when we'd signed over all the cheques, signed the contract and everything. Agents shrugged, saying "this is Dubai". We said, you've taken the commission, you have to find us a property at 190k... so chop chop, because the going rate is already higher. So they came back with an alternative, we rock up and there's another random agent there. We like it, so we sign up. The documents don't come through. Basically, agent #2 didn't agree with the percentage of our original commission that agent #1 had agreed to give him so was refusing to release the contract... all kinds of dodgy deals and we were caught up in the middle of it! It turned out that the LL was also getting a cut of it too, or a cut of some other money we'd already handed over so it very much felt that we were just getting shafted by everyone... which we were, I guess. --- I also don't think that what you describe is a proper scam - apart from the fact they weren't transparent about it. Strictly speaking, the LL *should* be paying the agent's fees (just like they do in most other countries int eh world), whether they call it a marketting fee/ admin fee or whatever. It's only natural that that fee, along with any other costs related to the property are then recouped through an adjusted rental price. Of course the tenant ends up paying... sadly... What is wrong is that the tenant should have to pay an extra fee tot eh agents for essentially pushing a piece of paper in front of their noses to sign (I'm sure there are some pro-active agents out there who do their jobs properly, but every one I've met basically wait for tenants to call them, and even then are late for viewings!). <em>edited by Hello.Again.Kitty on 27/06/2011</em>
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Latest post on 27 June 2011 - 12:58
That's great news about the bedtime routine and subsequent easier life! As for getting them settled when they wake, I'm no fan of the hardcore versions of CIO, but have always taken a slightly softer stance that balances the "I'm here for you" with "enough already, I don't have all night"... I guess it follows the Baby Whisperer most closely. Again, 18 months (or is she 16 months) is a bit early for a big bed - just in terms of getting them to stay put! I moved DD to a big bed at that age to free up the cot in time for DS, but we had to have a stair-gate on her bedroom door to contain her and there were a good few evenings when she'd be wailing at the gate (obviously, we'd go to her, lead her back to bed, tell her it's time to sleep, tuck her in and leave)! Consistency is key, both in all care-giver's attitude and in the situation. Don't attempt to crack it while MiL is there, but at the same time, don't let your hard work in the routine take a step backwards. Be as firm as you need to be with MiL, but put her in her place and tell her in no uncertain terms what she cannot do. You could always couch this as "would you like to do her new bedtime routine this evening?" and involve her completely in it, but explain what's involved and when it finishes. Don't forget that in 20-odd years' time, you will probably be a MiL too, so get practising that stubbornness! ;)
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Latest post on 26 June 2011 - 22:14
Can anyone out there tell me how a family we know, resident in Dubai for a good number of years, is claiming Child Benefit from the UK? I find this very confusing as they dont intend to ever live in the UK but do have family whom they visit every year. How can this be the case? they can't - they're committing benefit fraud, no more, no less. Even with a "permanent" UK address, you have to declare to the benefit authorities if you are to be out of the country for more an 8 weeks at a time (in which case they will suspend payments)... if you do not, any payments made during that time or subsequently, while you are still abroad are not rightfully yours... and you become liable to pay them all back and/or be "done" for benefit fraud. The thing is that Benefits are handled by a different authority to the Tax people and they don't talk to each-other (I found this out after thinking that once I declared myself non-resident, it'd all be on one system and shut everything down automatically... it didn't - thankfully, in the end, but it was a nightmare getting to the bottom of it all.) In any case, it's a very risky stance to take, because there's no saying if in the future it won't all be tied up and when/if those people set foot back in the UK and declare themselves to be resident once more, Mr Taxman may decide to look into their finances and it may get flagged up. It could also backfire big time, because if they were saying to the benefits people that they were actually permanently resident in the UK (the only way you can get benefits unless you're with the army or diplomatic corps) and getting all the perks from that, then Mr Taxman will rub his hands in joy at the prospect of all that backdated expat-salary he's about to tax! There's no halfway house in being "permanently resident" - either you are or you're not.
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Latest post on 26 June 2011 - 16:06
such is the wonder of the Intarwebz...
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Latest post on 26 June 2011 - 15:49
he'd be very naive to not consider the consequences of his actions. No pity.
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Latest post on 26 June 2011 - 15:40
er... my firstborn (girl) is pretty much not at all timid, so no, it's not a "girl thing". I also know little boys who are quiet and sensitive. Firstly, I think the lack of peer interaction may have something to do with it, although most of all it's probably just her nature and there's absolutely nothing wrong with that. Some people have strong characters, others are quieter - it takes all kinds and she will undoubtedly find her way. Being "confident" shouldn't be banded in with being "dominant"... and so it's up to us, regardless of our children's nature, to give them the self-confidence they need - whether it's to be a quietly confident, studious child, or to be confident and outward-going. In social situations, you are, as the parent, always leading by example. Stepping in to a potentially bullying incident doesn't mean to say you have to go in all guns blazing - you're in effect demonstrating to your children (and the other children) how to deal with conflict. If I see a snatching incident that involves either of my two (where they could be the ones snatching or not), then I do step in and invariably give the toy back to the child that it's been snatched from, addressing the snatcher and telling them that they need to take turns, how sharing is really wonderful and that when so-and-so has finished playing with the toy, then, and only then can they have it. Also, there's nothing wrong with your daughter. Praise her and build on her character, instead of looking to the domineering ones as "better"- this will give her the tools to stand up for herself when she needs to. In handing over toys and whatnot, she could also be showing quite some maturity and quickly assessing whether whatever it is is worth a fight - concluding that, no it's not... which is a lesson I'm trying hard to teach my own daughter!
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Latest post on 26 June 2011 - 14:44
I was an expat when I turned 16 and didn't get one. When I moved back to the UK full-time at 19, I was allocated an emergency NI number to get me into the NHS system as a student, but was also charged at "emergency" tax rates on my part-time earnings (which were then readjusted when it was clear I was sticking around!). My parents had completely sold up in the UK so we had no UK address, although they still had bank accounts (don't count) and even I had a bank account (didn't count!). The fact you moved away permanently overrides any previous claims of child benefit (and the rule is that you shouldn't be out of the UK for more than 8 weeks, otherwise your claims are essentially fraudulent). The only way to get a proper NI number is for the claimant to be able to prove they are permanently resident in the country, often armed with 3 months' worth of utility bills. As for the driving license, yes it is resident specific because it has to state a valid permanent UK residence. There have been other threads by people who have found this out the hard way in trying to renew their UK license whilst being permanently resident abroad - and it being declined.