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Hello.Again.Kitty

Hello.Again.Kitty
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Latest post on 01 February 2011 - 16:01
there's also: IYSWIM - if you see what I mean FTW - for the win (said in a heavily sarcastic way) WTF - what the... and then a series of "/action" which is used in online games to do the action... so /cry... /drool or my favourite /golfclap (again, highly ironic weak clapping) Urban Dictionary has all the definitions (won't tempt fate by linking them again tho!) Not forgetting the newly coined TCM - Toxic Competitive Mum. Indeed... TCM's ftw. /golfclap for sonny-jim being able to recite pi at 2 1/2 <em>edited by Hello.Again.Kitty on 01/02/2011</em>
Hello.Again.Kitty
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Latest post on 01 February 2011 - 15:41
Just playing Devil's Advocate here - we mustn't forget that there are also women out there who find themselves having children because it's what's expected of them, and yet have little interest in getting the paints out or playing with them, even if they are SAHM, so they outsource it, just like you'd outsource your laundry or cleaning. I guess it'd be a bit of a moral debate whether they should have kids to start off with, but we all know that once they're out, you can't put 'em back! Different strokes for different folks.
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Latest post on 01 February 2011 - 15:26
there's also: IYSWIM - if you see what I mean FTW - for the win (said in a heavily sarcastic way) WTF - what the... and then a series of "/action" which is used in online games to do the action... so /cry... /drool or my favourite /golfclap (again, highly ironic weak clapping) Urban Dictionary has all the definitions (won't tempt fate by linking them again tho!)
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Latest post on 01 February 2011 - 09:22
So....is the problem that some of you socialise a little too much with Toxic Competitive Mums. ;) TCM's... a new code-word. I laik.
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Latest post on 01 February 2011 - 09:20
not necessarily done out of spite, but maybe just an over-zealous cleaner. We've sadly lost DD's most favourite soft toy a couple of times (hence the replicas in the cupboard) and retracing my steps within minutes of dropping it and it was gone... the only people around were the cleaners who didn't understand a word! Also, in Dubai Mall, DH caught a cleaner in the act. DS had dropped his cuddly in the food court and it was maybe a meter of so away from the buggy, cleaner dude just picked it up and threw it in the bin without even looking around for the potential owner, so DH got him to fish it out.
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Latest post on 01 February 2011 - 09:16
you have to book a seat for them, because they cannot be on your lap after they are 2. We did this after Xmas - DS is 18 months old, but will be 2 by the time we return - booking his own seat is the best thing ever!
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Latest post on 01 February 2011 - 09:14
I get fed up about the one-up-manship and parading the kids around like performing monkeys - whether they go to nursery or not. How about referring to the child's happiness and sociability instead of reeling off how they are sooo advanced and can recite whatever the parent/ teacher has been feeding them. My DD started nursery when she was 3. She's a chirpy, confident (oh yes, is that!) little lass with a love of learning and insatiable curiosity, that nursery currently satisfies, when being at home no longer could.
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Latest post on 01 February 2011 - 09:03
Well, if you're already past your due date, then it's litterally going to be a matter of days before you go into natural labour anyway. Could you not discuss induction if you really didn't want to wait for labour to start naturally? Besides, what exactly is your Dr saying? Giving birth to a 4kg baby isn't impossible by any stretch of the imagination and if bubs is head down, then you're all ready to go. If bubs is breach, yeah, maybe a c-section, but otherwise, follow your gut feel. <em>edited by Hello.Again.Kitty on 01/02/2011</em>
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Latest post on 01 February 2011 - 08:51
Yup, she should just walk away. I've known people who've been strung along, moved out here with all the associated costs, then has their start date postponed and a few weeks later been told that they're no longer needed, so they have to pack back up and go home again... at their cost. Unless you have a watertight contract signed before coming out, forget it. Verbal agreements aren't worth the hot air and emails should be taken with a pinch of salt. Of course, if you've got time and cash to spare, you could always risk it, but I would prefer spending £10k on a firework display - the effect is slightly more pleasant, but comes down to the same thing. Be under no illusions here - employers will try it on and push that to whole new levels, even within respected companies. There is a labour law, but it can be got around and flaunted in so many ways, without so much as a slap on the wrist for the company.
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Latest post on 31 January 2011 - 17:24
The main purpose of the 12 week scan is to determine if you have a multiple pregnancy. The NT scan and/or the bloodwork is to determine the risk of you having a Downs child. If you don't think either of these issues would be an issue for you, then you don't have to do them, I guess. NT scans have only been available recently (didn't have one 3 years ago), so with my first, I only had the 12 weeks scan and the Triple Test. With DS, I only had the NT scan, and since that'd come back low risk, I passed on the blood tests (with DD, it'd come back with a 1 in 100,000 chance, so I was pretty relaxed anyway). However, the early scans are very helpful in determining other more serious conditions too. I have a friend whose 12 week scan basically showed a baby who had exceptionally severe deformities and she took the brave decision to terminate, which is of course easier to do, the earlier you decide to do it. Oh, and in the UK we only have 2 scans if a pregnancy is normal - one at 12 weeks and the other at 20. <em>edited by Hello.Again.Kitty on 31/01/2011</em>
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Latest post on 31 January 2011 - 16:03
well, all the breastfeeding support groups are run by volunteers, so you could contact them (there's a page in this board listing them all) and then there are various Doula companies, which would give good support experience. Hello.Again.Kitty - I can't seem to find a list of breast feeding support groups on here? http://www.expatwoman.com/forum/messages.aspx?TopicID=114076 Hope this helps!
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Latest post on 31 January 2011 - 12:41
It's grey and dusty here in the Marina
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Latest post on 31 January 2011 - 12:39
Good point, H.A.K, and on reading it again that makes sense. I think I must have had my obtuse head on this morning. I'm so glad other DHs just don't get it either. I've often wondered if mine is just particularly thick in some ways, but I guess not. I'm also very glad there's been light at the end of the tunnel and you lot all have more than one baby so it must get better in the end! :D Edited because I had one too many full-stops in the abbreviation of H.A.K. I think I need to get out more. edited by DubaiCat on 31/01/2011 Ach, just call me HK - I never wanted to change it anyway! ;) I think part of the "DH just doesn't get it" bit is that quite simply, they can't. Lord knows, some try their hardest, but we're in such a "special" (I was going to say "privileged", but nah... "spethial" is more apt) that there's actually lots that only we can do and experience. I had to learn to give credit to my DH for doing what he could and to realise that we are 2 different elements of the same team, although it took me over 6 months to work that one out.
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Latest post on 31 January 2011 - 11:22
Dirty old men and gold digging slags - they deserve each other. And my DH did/does want a wife with her own life/career thank you very much! If that makes me a feminist then I guess he wants a feminist! Exactly - it takes all kinds. I wouldn't shack up with a man with a mentality stuck in the early 20th century to start off with. DH doesn't want an anodyne trophy wife either. BESIDES, having a career doesn't mean you're not a whizz at baking! ;)
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Latest post on 31 January 2011 - 11:13
I'm actually already a Doula but because I work full time I've never been able to actually do it! Babies aren't born on a schedule sadly for me! I'll check out the breastfeeding support groups but I was under the impression that you have to have children and have breastfed yourself to provide support in one of these, though I may be wrong. Thanks for your help Hello.Again.Kitty. Well, of course it helps, but often it's about a listening ear and a few objective tips! Also, a lot to do with midwifery is about the support before and after the birth, so just being there for new mums should give you great insight into your prospective career path.
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Latest post on 31 January 2011 - 10:18
well, all the breastfeeding support groups are run by volunteers, so you could contact them (there's a page in this board listing them all) and then there are various Doula companies, which would give good support experience.
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Latest post on 31 January 2011 - 10:14
designbabe, your post suggests AD doesn't give her DD enough love and attention and that's why she is demanding with feeding. And Appletiser, yours just sounds a little short and harsh. I'm sure both posts were written with the best of intentions but as Pomegranate says, we're all in need of support and kind words on here, especially when we're not coping. edited by DubaiCat on 31/01/2011 I didn't read it like that at all. It's common, nay, inevitable, that toddlers will react to the arrival of their sibling and they'll do it in different ways, all of which are to gain more attention (going from 100% mummy attention to anything less is going to be a bit of a shock). Feeding time is a very special moment, so it's a clear target. Designbabe's advice was to keep the same amount of attention, but shift it away from feeding to something more enjoyable for everyone, which is so very sound. I also feel that Appeltizer's post wasn't out of order - it is chilling, but as someone who also found feeding uncomfortable, borderline repulsive at times and was chilled by my own feelings, it's a matter of accepting them and dealing with them, either emotionally or physically, but deal with them, you must. There's no shame whatsoever in feeling what you do. We're very complex beings and are brought up in a world full of contradictions. Motherhood and breastfeeding brings a lot of our good points and not so good points - it's all part of who we are, no more, no less. The Breastfeeding Mums in Dubai coffee mornings have started up again (yay!), so do come along, even if you're hardly feeding any more, or want to stop... it's round people's houses, so really informal, no need to put the fake smile on and well, it's just normal mums, with all our brilliance and woes.
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Latest post on 31 January 2011 - 09:43
Not just the feminists... I was brought up being told that I could do whatever I wanted and could have it all, but sadly, when you really reach far, you do find a glass ceiling. Still, what we do have is choice, which is a real blessing and more than many have. Thanks for the party advice! I wasn't really talking about the glass ceiling as much as about the fact that there are only so many hours in the day. It is quite simply impossible to work a full time job and be a full time mother. ... and to do both to the best of your ability, yes. I agree completely. The thing is, I know what takes priority for me, and much as I love my career (in tatters /cry), it's only a job. The big problem is that employers also assume this (so, correctly, in this case) and adjust work responsibilities to suit. I know full well that in my line of work, were I to want part-time work (about as common as chicken's teeth anyway), I wouldn't be given my own project to run and would probably end up doing stuff that would be given to a graduate. Funnily enough, when I first got here, there was an article in a construction industry magazine about high-flying mothers. One woman - mum to a couple of young children and at director level or something - was saying how she'd occasionally had to miss out on family holidays, often worked weekends, but tried to get home for bedtime at least twice a week. She justified this by saying that she was doing it now, when they were little, so that she'd be able to spend more time with them when they were older, which just made me cry... she was obviously so detached from family life not to have realised that when they're teens, the last thing they'll want to do is hang around with their mum. It was at that point that I felt staying at home, just for their Early Years was entirely the right thing for me to do. Your career may never be the same again, but nor is your life! --- KC, I digress. With regards to your DH, you both need to have open discussions about your fears and hopes for this change. Think of them as team meetings! Lay out your parameters and expectations and get him to do the same. He needs to buy in to the whole thing too. It's a big change and will effect you both, so it needs to be discussed. ... and if he gets all macho, just kick him into line! ;) <em>edited by Hello.Again.Kitty on 31/01/2011</em>
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Latest post on 30 January 2011 - 23:41
You lost the last 4kgs? OK, that's it, the boobie bar is officially closed! :D I'm down to a feed every other day or thereabouts, and only a tiny feed. How long will it take before my body stops making milk or will I need to go through a few days of feeling sore and like I'm going to explode? And if I do need to do this, is it better to express a tiny bit or just leave them? If you're just feeding every other day already, then I'd imagine that your body would hardly notice if you stopped!
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Latest post on 30 January 2011 - 23:33
Feminists of my generation were told growing up that we could have it all and unfortunately that's just not true. Something needs to give, and only you know what will make you happiest. For me being able to give 100% to my son and be there all the time with him makes me happier than only seeing him on weekends and continuing to have a successful career would. In a perfect world I would work 2-3 days a week at an intellectually challenging job, but since that isn't possible staying home is the best choice for me. Not just the feminists... I was brought up being told that I could do whatever I wanted and could have it all, but sadly, when you really reach far, you do find a glass ceiling. Still, what we do have is choice, which is a real blessing and more than many have. LJB, as for talking to people at parties, still say you're a banker - that's what they're looking for - but that you're taking a sabbatical/ extended maternity leave because it's a real opportunity in this day and age to be able to do so. You could also sneak in a "life's too short not to make the most of it" comment! If anyone makes a snide remark about how easy my life must be, I just smile and say, "hmmm, I often wish I could go back to work for a break!".
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Latest post on 30 January 2011 - 19:04
good to know. i breastfed anyway but was just getting abit annoyed with them. Oh don't worry - I was travelling solo once and was feeding DS (then 3 months) - or was he asleep in my arms because I wasn't allowed to put him in the bassinette? - when a stewardess came and politely asked me if I could control my DD (then 2 yrs) more because at that point, 5 hours in to the flight, she'd escaped to stretch her legs. Er, let me think?! At this particular point in time, I'm finding that a bit challenging - fancy actually helping out?!
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Latest post on 30 January 2011 - 18:59
Maybe I am just reading too much into DD's actions, but DD is 11 months old and indicates that she wants to potty by flaring her nostrils and making a clear grunting sound (not very ladylike), we strip off her nappy and she poops in the potty and then tries to stand up when she is done. If she does not want to potty, then no matter how hard we try, she does not sit down on the potty. She does still poo in her nappy from time to time, but it is an exception rather than the rule. I believe on some level she understands the need to poo in the potty because she gives us her nose flare and grunt and then waits till we put her on the potty. only if we miss the sign or do not respond fast enough does she go ahead and poo in her nappy and then screams till she gets changed. We started doing this when she was 7 months old and it took us about 3 weeks to get her signals. I know that we still do ALL the work, but I really hope that it is a foundation for the future. You're lucky! I think a lot is down to personality and sort of natural habits. Both of my two were/are happy to sit in a dirty nappy without giving any signals of discomfort. That translated into DD not caring if she did a poo in her knickers, nor did she care if she was made to continue wearing her wet knickers (though we'd give that a try when all else was failing!)...
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Latest post on 30 January 2011 - 18:50
I used to have a challenging job and after 3 years (and counting) as an SAHM, I find it really helpful and healthy to consider my SAHM role as a job, no more, no less. We're working from home, have the most demanding and fickle boss(es) in the world, there's never a day the same and we like nothing better than having a good natter with colleagues over a cup of coffee. There are also times when you're worked off your feet, driven to distraction, bored stiff having to do mundane stuff and spend a bit too long in the morning ignoring your work and surfing the net instead. But, there are also times when you have a great time, love your job, and even better, your boss comes up and says thank you for being so great. I don't buy into the whole sacrifice thing nor pandering to the male ego... I'm not up for sacrificing diddly squat and being a SAHM doesn't mean that DH gets his meals on the table when he comes home! I think the financial dependence has been the hardest thing for me to deal with and although DH is very sweet, making sure that I know he sees it as "Team Kitty", I still feel somehow vulnerable. I still have my own account though and we have money going into it from the joint account so that I don't have to ask for cash! Being a SAHM is all about networking, keeping yourself active and motivated. Returing to work is always a concern - I am in a profession where a break is very difficult to recover from :( but I think by the time I go back to work next year, I'll have crammed so much into the previous 4 years "out" that no-one could say I've been dossing around!
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Latest post on 30 January 2011 - 18:32
lol - tell them to f off (politely!)! It's relatively easy to feed whilst bubs is in that extension belt thing, so go for it. In any case, I've often thought that the baby restraint on a parent's lap is a token measure anyhow, because if there was any impact and you had to lean forward suddenly, you wouldn't be able to without crushing them. Doesn't really bear thinking about.
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Latest post on 30 January 2011 - 18:25
You could also get off at the Marina stop and visit the Marina or at the JLT stop and got to the beach at JBR (and The Walk), which is about a 5-10 minute walk from the Metro - take the side exit and cut through the little playgound, turn left until the end of the road, turn right and cross over the bridge and it's right in front of you.
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Latest post on 30 January 2011 - 12:39
You don't need to go into detail with her - she's young and should be left to imagine in her own way. You could say that the burial site is to help everyone remember her sister... I guess people cope in different and sometimes surprising ways. <em>edited by Hello.Again.Kitty on 30/01/2011</em>
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Latest post on 30 January 2011 - 12:33
Your level of dedication should be directly proportional to that of your company towards you. It's a sad fact that so many places don't pay overtime, don't pay bonusses and have even stopped doing the token goodwill bits like an end-of-year party. Work dutifully and to the best of your ability (always!) during the hours contracted, and then leave at home time knowing that you've done your job well. Learn to place a value on your life outside work.
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Latest post on 30 January 2011 - 11:00
the inner tubes of P&Ts are actually a standard size and so any good bike shop with have them. ;) GGP, get anything you can in the UK before you come over - packing light is all very well and good, but on P&T bits, it's twice the price over here... alright, that sounds sensible. let me know if there is anything i should pick up for any of you guys (with regards to phil and ted bits). Honestly, if you're shipping your stuff over, fill an entire box with wet-wipes, sugar-free calpol, the nappies you like, everything. Wet-wipes are about £2.50-£3 for a pack of 80, sugar-free medicine of any kind, you just can't get and nappies are just extortionate and poor quality (although I am happy with a brand here, but not a patch on Tesco's or Nature's Baby!). Hoover up summer clothes to last the next year for your kids, buy crocs from SportsDirect in the next couple of sizes up... if you do all that, no kidding, you'll be saving yourself a few hundred quid.
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Latest post on 30 January 2011 - 10:54
from experience, the earlier you start, the longer it takes... or rather, regardless of when you start, by the age of 3, they'll be trained! You could start training them from 3 months old, if you so wished, but until they know in advance when they need to go, can hold on until they get to the appropriate place, get there by themselves, do the deed and clean up after themselves, it's you doing the hard work... and it is hard work (more so than nappies!) I tried starting DD when she was just over 2 and had to postpone because it just wasn't happening. 6 months later, I was still the first of my ante-natal group to start and not kidding, it took 6 months for her to have no daytime accidents. I have a couple of friends who held off until their kids were nearly 3 and waited until the child decided it didn't want nappies and they were done within a couple of days. DD is now 3yrs 3 months and self toilets and is dry at night (with one pit-stop at 22h30) With DS, I'm not listening to anything anyone says about how their little dahrling was trained at 18 months... I can't bear the prospect of a rerun of DD's training, so it'll be whenever he turns round and tells me! Also, and this is something very important to bear in mind - just with "sleeping through the night", people's interpretation of what constitutes a potty-trained child differs. The author of "Potty Training Boot-Camp", who claims to have your child trained within a week actually defines "trained" as knowing what to do where and achieving it 50% of the time. Er, sorry mate, but that's still a lot of wee to mop up!
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Latest post on 30 January 2011 - 10:41
the inner tubes of P&Ts are actually a standard size and so any good bike shop with have them. ;) GGP, get anything you can in the UK before you come over - packing light is all very well and good, but on P&T bits, it's twice the price over here...
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Latest post on 30 January 2011 - 09:02
This is my favourite inspiration site for themed cakes - although there are some only a mother could love! [url=http://www.coolest-birthday-cakes.com/spiderman-cake.html'>"Coolest Birthday Cakes"[/url'> Black writing icing is quite easy to get hold of and blue is easy to make with a normal liquid food colouring, but the deep, strong red a bit more difficult. You can get small packs of deeply coloured ready-made fondant (about 5 colours in the pack), so if you're canny about how you design it, you could do it quite easily.
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Latest post on 30 January 2011 - 08:57
Hmmm... I usually buy randomly (and only realise when I get home that it doesn't really work with anything) but I've taken to stocking up when I'm back in the UK - prices here are just so extortionate and since I usually shop in the UK high-street shops (New Look, H&M, etc...) I don't like being reminded how much I'm getting ripped off! I went back at Xmas and hit the sales in the biggest single spending spree in my life (not saying much - lol) because I've finally dropped a dress size, so all my existing clothes were either out of fashion, too worn (had seen me through 2 babies!) or just way too big. Happy days.
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Latest post on 29 January 2011 - 12:55
"sowing" is for seeds... "sewing" is stitching.
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Latest post on 29 January 2011 - 00:43
It looks decent enough. I've never been inside, but it's been open for the past 2+ years. The pool is a bit pants though (you can see it from JBR Plaza). From Dubizzle, it seems quite expensive for a 2 bed (130k?!), considering that you can get a 2 bed elsewhere from 80k to 120k... still, if the finishes and overall quality is worth it to the tenant, then who's to quibble. You're right close to a bus stop there too. I'm just getting soo nervous. i was in dubai the week of the 17th and our relocation guy wasn't very helpful. we have a strong budget, but i'm looking for a very high spec kitchen and bathrooms, but i can be flexible on almost everything else. i don't know where the best place to look is still because it all looked the same to me (everything just buzzed by and i'm confused). at the end of the day though, i have a feeling we'll end up trying to find something at AR or The Villa. I can't say I've ever seen what I'd call a high-spec kitchen here, sadly. They seem to think the be all and end all is a black granite worktop... never mind if it's stuck in a cupboard! The same goes for bathrooms. I've got a jacuzzi and separate shower in mine, which sounds fab on paper but in reality the whole bathroom is so badly planned that well, it beggars belief! Quite how you get an awkward pinch-point in a bathroom that's bigger than most single bedrooms in the UK is beyond me! The workmanship across the board is poor too, but that's pretty much everywhere. The best advice is to go and view these places. If you have a large budget, then that's great, but adjust your expectations to what's on offer. A lot looks swish, but when you look closer, there are bits an bobs that don't quite fit the "luxury apartment" bill. Still, I'm in the Marina and really like it.
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Latest post on 29 January 2011 - 00:16
It looks decent enough. I've never been inside, but it's been open for the past 2+ years. The pool is a bit pants though (you can see it from JBR Plaza). From Dubizzle, it seems quite expensive for a 2 bed (130-140k?!), considering that you can get a 2 bed elsewhere from 80k to 120k... still, if the finishes and overall quality is worth it to the tenant, then who's to quibble. At that price though, they are on a par with the Emaar buildings and the other top-end ones. You're right close to a bus stop there too. Community, well, there's the whole of JBR and the rest of the Marina. The Jewels are down the Jebel Ali end of the Marina, which is the least finished part, but it's all relative and places spring up faster than mushrooms. The sea view now features a phone mast, but no one seems to care about there here. Here's a [url=http://www.propertyadvicedubai.com/location-and-floor-plans/Jewels.aspx'>link[/url'> to the floor plans - although bear in mind there may be some variation between them and what's actually been built. There's the usual quirky Dubai layouts that focus more on cramming in all the "luxury" ensuites than creating decent living spaces, but hey... some are really quite nicely done. <em>edited by Hello.Again.Kitty on 29/01/2011</em>
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Latest post on 28 January 2011 - 21:33
at least for some of us you can refer to the song 'do your ears hang low' but just put in the word b00bs Wahahahaha.... I can so join the choir on this one. Sadly, my ladies have headed South since having fed my DS's. I thank la senza bras now Hehe! so true! Saying that, you've gotta thank the whole process for introducing us to decent bras, eh?! I'm still a size bigger than pre-preg (E cup now) and again, that's great - look, no surgery!
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Latest post on 28 January 2011 - 19:04
I found that my boobs reduced gradually, although for about a week after stopping feeding my first (I'd gone up to a G cup), I did have a sneak preview of my chest at 70! lol NOT a pretty sight! Still, they recovered but never went down to my pre-pregnancy size, which I am most happy about! Second time around, they weren't quite so Jordan-esque so it didn't really make much difference. I didn't have any noticeable weight loss after stopping feeding, but my periods came back literally 2 weeks after stopping. If you stop all of a sudden, you may feel engorged for a couple of days, but it'll then pass.
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Latest post on 28 January 2011 - 16:53
I just wanted to give you some words of comfort - having conceived both your children naturally, you're not infertile. Getting pregnant isn't guaranteed every month, even if you were to conceive every month, which again, isn't guaranteed. It really brings home how much of a miracle every baby is. Being 40, even in a few years time, doesn't mean that you won't have children beyond that point either. I know a few people who had their first baby in their early 40s, having conceived completely naturally. My one word of advice is to relax and enjoy the process. Getting stressed and upset - and especially getting your DH stressed - can hinder your efforts, rather than help them. Give yourselves a break... and maybe you'll get a surprise!
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Latest post on 28 January 2011 - 10:53
Both times I just pottered around doing normal things being generally gutted that I wasn't in labour!
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Latest post on 28 January 2011 - 10:51
I was really hoping that it gets better with time. I will go mad if it continues on for the next 2 years. I think that 'one' has now become the new "terrible twos". About the going out alone with DH and spending quality time with each other, how do you overcome the guilt factor of leaving the LO at home? I sometimes go out grocery shopping alone leaving DD with DH and I just feel so guilty for leaving her. If I think of me time DH just cannot manage alone with her. Even if I leave her for a few minutes with him, he goes crazy and start screaming for me. Did that just now as he could not bath her. Argh it seems to be such a no win situation! I sometimes feel like running away from it all. I know it sounds horrid, but I don't feel guilty leaving them... or maybe a bit of pleasurable guilt like when you scoff a slice of chocolate cake in the kitchen when no-one's looking! I guess I just balance it with the fact that day in, day out, I am dealing with their dramas, interacting with them and just being manic, so 3 hours away every week isn't that much in exchange. We also usually go out of an evening when they're asleep... and I do feel a bit naughty leaving them during the day. I have no problems with them being looked after during the day by DH or other family (when we get the chance) - although sometimes roll my eyes at what they've been allowed to get away with! As for DH not being able to cope - heck, I'd never changed a nappy, fed or bathed a baby before DD came along and just had to learn - very quickly! It's not rocket science. Had it been my DH (and I think he's tried it before) I'd have told him to man up and get on with it! Sometimes, also, infuriatingly, they're better behaved with other people, when you're not around. Mummies get all the tantrums, because we're just soooo special! Grrr...
Hello.Again.Kitty
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EW EXPERT
Latest post on 28 January 2011 - 10:40
Hun, Cerazette actually made me depressed, rather than helping. I had to come off it after 6 weeks because I was at an all time low, low self esteem, low mood, crying and angry most days. A progesterone-only pill that worked for me with no side effects was Micronor. I know I'm not there in the consultation room with you, but I'd strongly advise that you try to stop the pills before you stop breastfeeding and I'm [not'> surprised that your Dr hasn't realised that. Breastfeeding releases endorphins (amongst other things) and it is a big thing to stop, so unless you are totally convinced that it's the right thing for your to do at that point in time, then don't. First time around, DD decided to stop after a gradual decrease, so I was sad, but happy that it was on her terms. With DS, it was a bit of an anti-climax and I was the one who initiated stopping. I felt really quite upset about it for a few weeks, to the extent that I often wondered if I could just pop him back on again and forget that I'd ever made that decision. You've done really, really, really well with the whole breastfeeding thing, and if stopping is what you need to do, then you can be proud of what you've done. BUT be at peace with it - if you have any inkling that you'll regret it, then don't do it just yet.
Hello.Again.Kitty
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EW EXPERT
Latest post on 28 January 2011 - 10:25
sleep patterns change. At 4 months, she could be getting ready for weaning. There is nothing wrong with your breastmilk, it's just another inevitable stage in her development. My DD followed that pattern - usual 4 hourly feed and then at 4 months she started cluster feeding from 19h30-22h30 every half hour and then waking every 2 hours at night. She was already avidly following my actions whenever I ate so I had a chat to my health visitor about it (the guidelines say to wait until the magic 6 month mark), who is a very clued up, pragmatic woman. She basically said, sure, I could wait, but I'd get no sleep from that point until 6 months and she was very obviously ready. You mustn't, however, start any solids before 40 months (18 weeks? 20 weeks?) because their gut isn't physically mature enough to process it.
Hello.Again.Kitty
1861
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EW EXPERT
Latest post on 28 January 2011 - 10:19
I'm surprised us frazzled mums haven't bumped into eachother more often! Seriously though, if you're looking around and seeing "all these mums" who look super-serene and coping just fine... don't believe the hype. Many, many of us put on our bravest faces when we're out and about and will gloss over our worries with a bright smile and "oh yes, we're all just fine!"... and then we'll go home and flop, cry, sulk or whatever else happens safely in our own 4 walls. I cannot stress the importance of making time for yourself and your relationship with Dh though. That was our biggest problem when my 1st was born - I was too caught up in the whole motherhood thing and couldn't get my head around making time. All my time was taken up - how could I make more?! Well, you just have to. Regular date nights with DH will help you stay in touch with who you were before motherhood hit you, and that is priceless. Find a trusted friend or hire someone to babysit and go out to the cinema or for a meal - all you need is 3 hours. Even if bubs doesn't settle or cries for those 3 hours, it doesn't matter, it's not the end of the world. Oh, and Icedqueen - I hope it does get better for you... it didn't for me - DD started tantrumming like that at 13 months and is still drawing audiences at 3yrs3 months!
Hello.Again.Kitty
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EW EXPERT
Latest post on 27 January 2011 - 23:29
ummmm, what I would like to know is what career is her mother in to be able to afford that wedding?!! well, despite popular belief, the men-folk work, often in trades and because they don't pay taxes, it's all savings. I would imagine that their overheads aren't huge and so a lot is left over to save for a wedding (arguably the most important day in a girl's life - and there's no uni fees on the horizon). I have no problem believing that they are virgins when they get married, because in such a small, close-knit community, the stigma attached to not being so would be huge. Their culture and community relies on close bonds, so an ousted family wouldn't be welcome anywhere. Just goes to show that it's not the clothing, but the individual's morals that count.
Hello.Again.Kitty
1861
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EW EXPERT
Latest post on 27 January 2011 - 22:58
but only want a house with those immaculate amazing awesome bathrooms---where should i look? I didn't think that kind of build quality existed anywhere in Dubai!
Hello.Again.Kitty
1861
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EW EXPERT
Latest post on 27 January 2011 - 22:05
yup, a good pharmacist will tell you that you need to see a dr first, before they can give you anything. Clean each eye with a different bit of dampened cotton wool, gently working from the bridge of the nose towards the ear to try and avoid any cross-contamination.
Hello.Again.Kitty
1861
Posts
EW EXPERT
Latest post on 27 January 2011 - 21:59
Yup, I found it exhausting with one - never a moment to yourself, and just constantly there cajoling, coaxing, supporting, cooking, cleaning up after... and then I had my second and realised how (in relative terms) easy it was. Of course, hindsight is a wonderful thing, and had I known, 1st time around, I would have relaxed more and stressed less. 2nd baby just fits in with your life (wouldn't call it a "lifestyle"!) and so, bless 'em, they get woken up from naps, hoiked around the shops and generally tagged along to whatever else needs to be done. Your playgroup mum (was it me?! lol) is definitely right - going from 2 to 1 to look after is like a walk in the park! I remember the fuss and stress I got myself in just taking DD (1st) shopping, but now, gosh, "only one" is a joy (nearly)... and I hardly recognise myself if I manage to get out without either of them! If ever you feel knackered with one running around, imagine 2... running in opposite directions! That's my life. :\: BUT it's a crying shame that what we do is so underestimated. You're right, with one or two (or more [shudder'>), your days are filled... and unlike at work, what makes it feel like rushing around like a headless chicken - or "firemanning" = rushing from one crisis to another - is the fact that we have to learn to drop everything at a moment's notice, which means that actually finishing tasks is a rare, rare occurrence! <em>edited by Hello.Again.Kitty on 27/01/2011</em>
Hello.Again.Kitty
1861
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EW EXPERT
Latest post on 27 January 2011 - 17:17
Pharmacist won't give anythign for eye infections to children without a prescription (rightly so). Bathe his eyes in saline, using a wad of cotton wool for each eye, going from the bridge of the nose out towards the ears. Throw the cotton wool away and wash your hands thoroughly... anything to prevent cross-contamination. If this happens to a baby who's being breastfed, word is that a few drops of breastmilk helps cure it. Didn't ever have to opportunity to test this theory, so can't say!
Hello.Again.Kitty
1861
Posts
EW EXPERT
Latest post on 27 January 2011 - 15:58
I wish my nursery would run a book thing... it's my only quibble with the place. :( I used to love reading the write-ups when I had my childminder in the UK, but here, diddly squat in written format.
Hello.Again.Kitty
1861
Posts
EW EXPERT
Latest post on 27 January 2011 - 14:26
Yep!!! That's what my mamma taught me and I did it with DD1 esp since she was on formula as well. I brush my own tongue too...... surprised some people dont...it contributes to the bad breath. I don't have bad breath...
 
 
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