dibdab | ExpatWoman.com
 

dibdab

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Latest post on 07 October 2014 - 13:34
We once bounced a cheque completely in error - we make sure that each month we put away an amount equivalent to a month's rent into a savings account and it doesn't get touched for anything else. So we always have the money ready for when the next rent cheque is due. And then we transfer it back into our current account a couple of weeks before the payment is due. However one crazy busy month I completely forgot to transfer the money back, time had flown so much that it hadn't even crossed my mind that it was rent time! So the cheque bounced due to insufficient funds. The bank did not contact us to let us know so the first thing we knew about it was when the landlord called us to see if everything was OK. I was so embarrassed and we immediately arranged a transfer to the landlord's account. So the point of my story is that our cheque bounced because of forgetfulness on our part and because the landlord contacted us it was resolved quickly and the landlord was happy. Needless to say I now set a reminder on my Outlook each time I need to transfer the rent money! Obviously in this case it is the second time that the OP has had a problem with the tenant so that isn't great - but it could be something silly like they are disorganised and haven't transferred the money. Not a good enough excuse when they owe their rent but also not particularly a criminal offence. However they do need to learn that they need to sort their finances out so I suppose there should be some consequences - just not sure what would be the appropriate approach without going to the police. I am not a landlord in Dubai but we do rent out our house in the UK, we have been unlucky enough to have a couple of problem tenants there - I know that the approach to debt in the UK is different but both times we have contacted the tenants to try to resolve the issue amicably without taking further action. One tenant did not communicate back to us at all so unfortunately after quite a while we had no choice but to take legal action, however with the other tenant we came to an amicable agreement.
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Latest post on 12 August 2014 - 20:43
I can highly recommend Divers Down, we have dived with them quite a few times. For half decent diving your friends are best avoiding Dubai and sticking to Fujairah and Musandam. The best diving we have found in the region is Damaniyat Islands in Oman which can be accessed through Extra Divers at Al Sawadi beach resort - but it is around a 5 hour drive so would only be good if they wanted to go for a couple of nights.
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Latest post on 15 May 2014 - 12:32
It would depend which part of Dubai you will be living in but from the Marina end it would be 45-50 mins if no traffic, my husband commuted to AD for 2 years and it is pretty busy in the mornings but if there were no accidents or anything then he could get to the furthest point of Abu Dhabi in 1h20m. He used to fill up with petrol daily and it would be around 60-70 dirhams per day but it would depend on what type of car he would be driving, ours is large. It is not so much the length of the journey but the boring-ness of it that my husband found difficult, it is such a boring drive and he was pretty tired by the end of the week. However he was going further than Masdar, I would definitely say it is do-able as a commute within Dubai could be 30 mins so it isn't a huge difference. A lot of people do the commute and get pretty sick of it pretty quickly but others find it OK, I guessyour husband won't really know that until he is doing it.
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Latest post on 14 May 2014 - 15:20
My passport was delivered by FedEx on 9th April so I am 5 weeks in - I can't for the life of me remember my log in details so I can't check the progress. I am not travelling until later in the year, I will be moving jobs but it looks like the timescale for that will work out OK too, I'm glad I didn't leave it until not long before travelling as it sounds like there are a lot of worried people out there!
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Latest post on 07 May 2014 - 17:44
I would say that it would be an extremely easy commute - you say you would not use the metro so I assume that you will be driving? I live in the Marina and work in DIFC and it takes 20 minutes when there is no traffic, sometimes even a bit less. The only thing would be that in Sharjah direction on SZR at rush hour there can often be traffic so it would probably be quicker to go across to Al Khail Road and drive down to Burj Khalifa that way but generally I would say a very reasonable commute.
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Latest post on 05 May 2014 - 16:29
It can't have been related to the flight if only that group of kids became ill and no other passengers are mentioned.
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Latest post on 05 May 2014 - 15:49
I had a similar situation with a best friend but without the concern of violence - her boyfriend, who we got on very well with, suddenly decided that he no longer wanted to socialise with me and my husband - we never actually found out why. We didn't see either of them for weeks and then I started to see her but it had already spoiled my relationship with her as she wasn't honest with me when I asked what was wrong and just kept saying he was busy - but apparently not too busy to have a great social life with other friends. So they ended up breaking up and of course I was there for her and we welcomed her into our home with open arms as she had nowhere else to go. I still don't know what it was all about and never got a proper apology - she kind of implied she should have stood up to him when he was refusing to see us but never really admitted that she had been wrong. So now we are still friends but I am still quite angry over it all and to be honest feel like a bit of a mug for not cutting ties with her when I was asking over and over again what the problem was. I don't know whether she thinks we are all fine and back to normal now but it has ruined our friendship as far as I am concerned because I was there for her the whole way through or at least kept trying to be but she never considered my feelings quite so highly and I'm just waiting for next time to be honest. The OP's situation is slightly different if she feels that her friend is under threat of violence but as much as I love my friend - and she is a very old friend - I kind of wish I had walked away because now I just don't feel like our friendship can ever be the same again yet she hasn't learnt any kind of lesson and I have probably ended up feeling much worse about the whole thing than she has.
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Latest post on 05 May 2014 - 15:15
I have never been in Index Tower but a friend lives there and is very happy with it. I have been in both the Maze and Capricorn Tower but only to offices - the Maze is much newer and looks lovely from what I have seen. Capricorn also seems nice. Capricorn and Maze very convenient for the metro whereas Index not so much so it depends whether you have a car. I live in the Marina but when I have looked for new apartments before I have found that the easiest way has been to walk into the buildings and speak to security - they have often let us into empty apartments to have a look and then have given us details of the agent or landlord - or if they haven't let us in then they have still usually had contact details for agents looking after the apartments, might be worth a try.
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Latest post on 28 April 2014 - 22:55
I went online to arrange my renewal in the first week in April and saw that from 7th April they were reducing the fees by quite a lot so I sent mine off on the 7th - guessing a lot of people may have done the same which will have caused an influx, not sure why applications from before then would be so delayed though. I thought I would be fine as no travel plans until September so thought it was a good idea to send my passport off nice and early - now it looks like I will be moving jobs so not quite sure where I will stand with my passport and visa in another country so I can't cancel one visa or apply for another, I am a bit worried about that now seeing as my passport only arrived in the passport office 19 days ago so it could still be weeks before I get it back :-(
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Latest post on 21 April 2014 - 15:54
Thank you Cornish Pixie
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Latest post on 20 January 2014 - 13:03
It is definitely in there, not sure what the deal is though off the top of my head - I think last year there was an adult voucher, a child voucher and one for towels or lockers. In the metro stations they sell a small voucher book for tourists - I am not sure what is in there but someone may know - just thinking that Wild Wadi might be in that one.
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Latest post on 15 January 2014 - 11:17
I don't know many people whose housing allowance actually covers their housing unfortunately, ours certainly doesn't. We just class salaries as a total amount rather than trying to budget according to the allowances. I guess a good way for your friend to try to get a higher allowance would be to produce her own report showing them the housing available on property finder and what her needs are, there are a few news articles around but I am not sure how credible they are as such because a lot of it is speculation on what the market is going to do this year, as far as I am aware there isn't anything official. It would be great if companies start to respond to the rising prices, my husband is only just again earning what he did 5 years ago thanks to pay cuts at that time, of course we consider ourselves very lucky that we both managed to remain in steady employment during this time but it would be nice to start feeling like things are improving financially.
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Latest post on 15 January 2014 - 11:10
Yes we had to do this when we bought our car but that was 4.5 years ago so I don't know whether anything has changed. The name that the cheque would be payable to was put in so at least we knew that the bank employee wasn't going to take it! The idea is that they can put in the amount of the outstanding loan and cash it if they need to such as if you default. Not that useful though surely because if one of your monthly payments bounces then I don't know how they would expect a cheque for the full amount to go through!
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Latest post on 23 December 2013 - 11:57
I've seen recommendations on here for Lifeworks.
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Latest post on 10 December 2013 - 16:45
Do you mean the little atomisers? If so then I got one from Virgin a few weeks ago. They also sell them in Sephora but they are a real hassle to fill up but the Virgin one is easy.
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Latest post on 10 December 2013 - 10:05
It sounds like you maybe have a touch of depression - nothing to be ashamed of at all and so many people suffer from it at some point. I know it is hard but try to tell your husband how you are feeling and it would also be good to talk to someone to learn how to deal with the different feelings you are having and how to cope when you feel like you can't juggle all the balls that you need to in your life. I have seen a lot of recommendations on here for Lifeworks Counselling so they might be worth a call. You shouldn't have to feel guilty for having the feelings you are - something like depression, if that is what it is, doesn't always make sense and it isn't something that only people with unhappy lives can suffer from, it can hit anyone at any time no matter how loving their husband and beautiful their children are. Really hope you can get the help you need to feel better soon.
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Latest post on 24 November 2013 - 18:04
Thanks for the replies, so I guess that with the DIFC form that derien kindly posted the link to I just need to tick the box for salary certificate? And then take that to MMI? Finally deciding to sort this after over 4 years in the UAE!!
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Latest post on 11 November 2013 - 12:40
A friend in the UK is a hypnotherapist and she has a lot of clients who have had medium to long term success with this, however a lot who haven't kept it up. You still have to really believe that it will work and you have to keep up with listening the the CD or whatever they give you, you must be constantly reminding yourself of what is said in the sessions and you do still have to have some willpower. I think a lot of people think you go along to a few nice sessions and you're cured of all cravings but it does still take some long term work.
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Latest post on 06 November 2013 - 11:21
I appreciate the tips. Dibdab, did things work themselves out re the complaint against your husband? You sound very calm and centered, thank you for the detailed response :-) Thanks Faded Blue Jeans, what a nice thing to say :-) Yes thank you, things worked out fine as the person who made the complaint was well known to be very lazy and a bit of a trouble maker and although my husband didn't have any written proof of this particular meeting he had plenty of proof of how he had tried to support him in other ways and help him learn. So my husband's boss was able to move the guy to another team and sweep it under the rug a bit instead of letting it be escalated because he knew that the complaint was unfounded.
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Latest post on 06 November 2013 - 10:38
Is there any other senior person who speaks the same language as him so that they can explain to him and make sure he understands? They could attend the meeting also and this may also help you to keep your cool if you have to remain professional in front of another person. Also maybe write an 'agenda' for yourself where you write down each topic that you want to discuss and bullet points under each one so that you don't 'rant' or go off topic. If you want to keep him on side then explain that you are there to work with him and not against him and you want to help him so he needs to talk to you about what it is that his preventing him from performing adequately in his job so that you can support him and help him to improve. Hand him a copy of the disciplinary policy and highlight where he currently is in terms of the process and make it clear where he will be if things don't improve. Also make sure you follow up with an email or letter summarising the points discussed and clearly telling him what the next stage is if he doesn't work to resolve the matters. Invite him to come back to you if there is anything that is not clear to him and say that if you have not heard anything from him by the end of tomorrow then you will assume that he fully understands the situation. Copy in the HR Team or your manager. This bit is so important as my husband had an issue where he thought he had resolved a dispute with a colleague through a chat and then a complaint was made against him and he had no proof of the steps he had taken to work through the issues with this person. edited by dibdab on 06/11/2013 <em>edited by dibdab on 06/11/2013</em>
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Latest post on 06 November 2013 - 10:08
I think Michael Page (agency) recruit for finance jobs, it might be worth giving them a call. I am not sure what the market is like but hope you find something soon. When I came here 5 years ago I was also told it would be easy to find a job and it was anything but and I then ended up taking a basic admin job which I was stuck in for ages. I hope you find something soon, I know how hard it is not to be working when you are desperate to. I was lucky that I didn't NEED to work as such as was with my husband but I was still very bored having no structure to my days, it isn't easy.
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Latest post on 06 November 2013 - 10:04
Some of the Jo Malone scents are very unusual - one or two of them I don't like but others are lovely. Apparently Kate Middleton wore the lime and basil one for her wedding! It is lovely to have a scent that reminds you of an occasion - I actually quickly spritzed on some of my sister's perfume (Coco Mademoiselle) as I was about to leave for the church on my wedding day as had forgotten to put my own into my bag and now whenever I smell it I am instantly reminded of my wedding day, lovely.
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Latest post on 06 November 2013 - 10:02
I am so sorry to hear about your fiance, I cannot imagine what you must be going through. Lifeworks clinic on Al Wasl Road has very good reviews, they may be worth a call to see whether they have anyone who specialises in this type of counselling. http://www.counsellingdubai.com/ I hope you can find the help you are looking for.
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Latest post on 06 November 2013 - 09:45
I think somewhere like Home Centre would have the type of baskets you are looking for - they have loads of different accessories. Other places probably would as well but Home Centre is very good value. With scented candles - Bath & Body or whatever it is called have a huge choice and they smell lovely, they also sell pretty holders to put them in. Please someone feel free to correct me with the shop name, I can't remember what it is called!
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Latest post on 06 November 2013 - 09:41
Glad things are looking better today, organising a wedding is so stressful and I don't think it means that you've lost sight of why you are getting married, it is just so much to arrange. And I think you are totally justified in getting frustrated with your guests for asking for information that they have already been given, how hard can it be to read an invitation? When we got married some of our guests were the worst and it really surprised me because it was people who I wouldn't have expected - sorting out the guest list was the only thing in the whole of the planning that had me in tears on numerous occasions. Our best man called me on the MORNING of the wedding to say that he didn't understand why his girlfriend couldn't sit with him on the top table! A fair enough question you may think - if we hadn't been through it all before with him and made sure we had introduced her to the people she was to be sitting with and they had said they were perfectly happy. When I am a bridesmaid or a guest at a wedding I do what I am told, wear what I am told, turn up when I am asked to and I don't question it. One friend decided that her wedding she would totally mix everyone up so that all of her friends and family would meet each other so we were all sitting on random tables with random people (not even with our partners) - I hated it but still smiled and said to her what a nice idea it was because she had been so pleased with it. I don't understand why some people have to be difficult. I hope you have a fantastic day and I am sure that on the day everything will be perfect and that any little details you are worrying about won't matter. If anyone does turn up looking like they are off for a day on the beach then it will only be them that looks silly, not you. Congratulations!
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Latest post on 22 October 2013 - 14:08
My best friend recently started a new job as a PA and a recruitment company called Millerhay or something like that found her job for her, I am sure she said they had a couple of other options as well so they might be worth a call.
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Latest post on 11 September 2013 - 13:55
The Observatory is lovely - beautiful views and the food is great. They have a pork station with lots of variety and all delicious, they also cook fresh seafood in whatever sauce you want - amongst other things. Would definitely recommend.
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Latest post on 04 September 2013 - 14:12
I have stayed at the following Maldives resorts: Velassaru Coco Palm Dhuni Kolhu Coco Palm Bodu Hithi All were amazing - however Velassaru had more choice of bars and restaurants (all very very nice), is only a 20 minutes transfer from the airport and was cheaper than the other two therefore I probably think it is the best value for money, we had a fantastic few days there last year - and it was in the travel Entertainer! Bodu Hithi has the most incredible water villas so would definitely recommend it if you want to stay in one, however we went for our honeymoon so it was quite expensive from what I remember.
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Latest post on 04 September 2013 - 10:02
I always buy the free range ones - they are French I think, approx. AED 18 for a box of 6 so not the cheapest but free range eggs are something I feel strongly about - never noticed a strange smell from them and we eat them regularly.
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Latest post on 04 September 2013 - 10:00
Choithram in the Marina has quite a good range in their freezer section.
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Latest post on 19 August 2013 - 12:48
just to let you know khao lak, was the victim to a oil spill don't know if they have cleaned it up yet.. Thank you for the warning, I will check on that.
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Latest post on 19 August 2013 - 10:33
Wow hiccups that hotel looks absolutely perfect but they don't have availability for when we want to go :-( Have you called them or just done it through the website? No I didn't call, I searched on their website and also searched for the same hotel on a couple of other booking sites - I will give them a call though if you think that might get better results, thanks for the suggestion.
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Latest post on 19 August 2013 - 10:33
Another Lady recommended this place to me on here - I have not been yet, but it is on the TO GO TO List: http://twinpalms-phuket.com/photo_gallery_phuket_resort.html Thank you, I will check it out :-)
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Latest post on 19 August 2013 - 10:31
I am also quite surprised that a lot of people think this is reasonable - when we first moved here I wasn't working for the first few months and straight away my husband added my name to his bank account and I had both a debit card and a credit card. Now he knows I would never go mad and especially as I wasn't working I did feel guilty spending money although he never made me feel that way - I just found it hard not to be earning as had always been self sufficient. But if I did want to withdraw money for taxis, meet friends for lunch, buy a pair of shoes etc. then I would do and would not need to get his permission first. Of course we were very open with each other financially and knew what we could and couldn't spend in order to save what we wanted to save so any large purchases would be discussed with each other but for the day to day things and fairly inexpensive personal items I would have the freedom to access the cash. On top of the guilt I put on myself for not working I would not have been able to cope with asking for money every time I needed it, I totally feel for the OP that this must be a horrible situation, especially knowing that there is absolutely no money available in case of an emergency or to be able to make last minute plans to do something. As other people have said, my advice to the OP would be to sit down and work out a weekly budget of all of the typical things that she would spend on - groceries, activities with her child, meeting other mums/friends for coffee, transport, buying personal items (within reason and if they are affordable) and present this to her husband and explain that having to ask for money on a daily basis is demeaning. I am sure she contributes many non financial things to their relationship and what if she were to ration them or insist that they were specially requested each time such as bringing up their child or cooking and cleaning?
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Latest post on 19 August 2013 - 10:14
Wow hiccups that hotel looks absolutely perfect but they don't have availability for when we want to go :-(
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Latest post on 18 August 2013 - 16:58
Thank you, I will have a look, sounds lovely!
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Latest post on 18 August 2013 - 15:57
Slightly random and specific request but can anyone recommend any nice, preferably not too large, hotels on the west coast of Thailand (due to bad weather on East coast when we want to go) which have a swim up bar? I know - we really should be able to drag our lazy selves out of the pool to get a drink but it would be nice if we don't have to, I love a nice swim up bar! Also ideally not on Patong Beach unless it is OK? I have not stayed on Patong Beach but have had a night out there which was fun for a night but it isn't somewhere I thought I would be in a rush to stay. Thanks
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Latest post on 21 July 2013 - 14:00
Would she like one of the Arabic name necklaces? I know they can be a bit touristy but I also think they are lovely and can look very classy - you could get her a gold one if want it to be special. Or how about an Arabic tea set? I love them with the teapots and the little glasses, again they can be touristy but they would be used and you would be able to get a beautiful high quality one.
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Latest post on 21 July 2013 - 13:56
Thanks for the replies guys, I will take a look. abby_n_christina - unless Warren is up for some babysitting then I don't think it is a good option for this time as one of the kids is just a baby but it looks fantastic so will definitely store it in my future places to visit list, looks like an amazing place to unwind and enjoy the outdoors!
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Latest post on 25 June 2013 - 09:49
It depends on how much you will use it - if you never go out then no but if you are going to be going to places where you can use the vouchers regularly then yes. For example we have the fine dining book and last night got a discount of AED 255 so if we use 2 vouchers then it has paid for the book already - we would definitely get our money back in 6 months but that is because once a month we will go to a restaurant where we can use a voucher, if you are never going to the restaurants in the book then it would not be worth it. Or the family one would be paid for if you went to a water park and then used 2 or 3 vouchers in cafes.
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Latest post on 24 June 2013 - 11:37
If you have a DIFC visa you can pay to have it moved into the new passport - it is around 400 dirhams I think so not cheap. However I am not sure whether this is possible with visas from other areas.
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Latest post on 12 June 2013 - 14:07
It's crazy - but definitely is true. A friend stayed at Zighy Bay a couple of weeks ago and had to get a NOC from her employer! Completely ridiculous.
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Latest post on 08 May 2013 - 12:29
I am sorry to hear you are feeling so low and very sorry to hear about your stillbirth, that must have been absolutely devastating. I cannot offer any personal advice as do not have children and haven't tried to yet but I have friends who have tried for a long time and have spoken to them about it so I do know it is very upsetting to want it so much and not be successful. Have you been to see a doctor? If you have been trying for over a year then I think it is worth just speaking to someone and asking for their advice, I have a friend in the UK who is currently going through a few tests to check that she is ovulating and other things and honestly out of everyone I know it seems quite common these days to have some difficulty conceiving, I guess because generally we leave it later now than previous generations did. I know it doesn't make you feel any better to know that others are going through the same thing but it is important that you don't feel like a failure but that it is normal to feel upset - I do think it is worth a visit to the doctor just to see whether there is any advice they can give. Really hope that your time comes soon but in the meantime it is important to try to keep yourself in good mental health and for it not to affect your relationship with your husband - there is a lot of help available these days if for some reason you are not able to conceive easily, keeping my fingers crossed for you.
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Latest post on 08 May 2013 - 12:21
Not sure if I dare ask this (!) - but are maids not entitled to a gratuity like everyone else? I thought it was labour law so it is a genuine question, are maid contracts different?
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Latest post on 07 April 2013 - 10:27
I have friends who went to Wild Wadi yesterday and said it was fine so I think it should be OK - it looks to be clearing a bit now anyway.
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Latest post on 07 April 2013 - 10:26
This completely confused me yesterday, we were driving along and I asked my husband to check the map to see which exit we needed to take, I told him we were on Bypass Road - then spotted a sign and said oh...we're on Emirates Road, I must have got confused. But it says 611, isn't Emirates Road 311?! After a few minutes of thinking we were going mad we realised that Bypass Road must now be called Emirates Road! Madness!
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Latest post on 25 March 2013 - 17:50
We have been to Sri Lanka in August - a bit rainy but such a fantastic place.
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Latest post on 25 March 2013 - 17:49
Dubai Garden Centre also sells it.
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Latest post on 17 March 2013 - 13:57
We are happy here - nice life, able to save money, great friends - however I know it isn't somewhere we will stay forever but I have no idea where we would go next. I do see us back in the UK at some point but not yet, maybe not for a good few years. However despite there being other places I would like to live I think we would struggle to leave here as would find it hard to adjust to not being able to save - we would ideally like to come away from our expat life with a nice nest egg for our future. Although who knows how much that should be! But is there anywhere else that is nice to live and also offers good salaries? We are very fortunate here that when we decide to start a family I would be able to leave work and we would still be able to save on my husband's salary but I can't imagine it being that way anywhere else. I would be very happy to work with children if it was a country that supported that such as in the UK where in many companies they are open to flexible working and there is affordable or free childcare/school. Or should we just resign ourselves that when we do decide to leave here then we will have to go back to the real world? :)
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Latest post on 13 March 2013 - 10:41
My husband and I live in 23 Marina and we are very happy there. There are 3 pools, one of them is for penthouse residents only, one is for women only (and I assume children) and one is for anyone. The one that everyone can use has outdoor and indoor areas including a small kids pool, it does not get the sun after around 1pm though. There is a building going up right next door but I'm not sure if it is still under construction or has been paused, we don't hear noise from it. There are a couple of other buildings under construction nearby and we have recently heard a bit of banging at night but not for long and it hasn't been a problem. There is also a running track which goes around the building on the podium and there are gyms. There is an area next to the gym for an indoor kids play area but not sure whether that has been done yet or will be soon....I haven't been down to the gym for some time!! There are no squash courts. The only drawback I could see for kids is that it is not great nearby for pedestrians - there is a small pavement that goes down towards Marina Walk but it is only just wide enough for a pushchair - adults have to walk single file. Also when coming up from the car park you have to get out of the lift and into another one to go up to the apartments so that could be a pain with a child and groceries or whatever. We love our apartment, it is a very spacious 3 bed - it has 3 balconies but all are quite small. No windows that open though so for fresh air (or as fresh as it gets in Dubai) you have to open the balcony doors. Really nice kitchen, fairly large maids room and lots of wardrobes so storage is great. I think all apartments come with 2 parking spaces. Traffic is occasionally bad at the moment thanks to all of the tram construction - there is sometimes a large queue for the lights outside Tamani Hotel during rush hour but at other times it is fine. It is very easy to get a taxi outside. <em>edited by dibdab on 13/03/2013</em>