kcinthecity | ExpatWoman.com
 

kcinthecity

kcinthecity
231
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Latest post on 09 February 2011 - 14:30
We to Dr. Catalin at Neurospinal. Cant say much for his bed side manner, but he prevented me from giving in to surgery (being pushed for it by a famous doc here), and explained my real problem (not the herniated disc but the degeneration). I thought he was pretty good. <em>edited by kcinthecity on 09/02/2011</em>
kcinthecity
231
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 09 February 2011 - 14:22
We hired an older lady housekeeper last year. I spent a lot of time looking for her (she is 40, never been married and mature). She fit into our house very well and was eager to please. She quickly became a part of the family and a valued member in our home. She has been with us since DD arrived and DD loves her and stays with her when I go to work. She does not clean the house, her duties involve taking care of DD when I am at work, feeding her, helping me with her bath and ocassional nappy changes and cooking us dinner. She makes beds, irons and does general tydying which is not much at all. Neither DH nor I are home for lunch. I do groceries and we have an agency maid who does sweeping, mopping, dusting, bathrooms, plants, etc every day. A few months ago DH mentioned we might move back home in 8-10 months. I immediately discussed this with her and her response was "As long as I get the same amount of salary, I will go with you because you are like my family" Her salary converted to our home currency would be extortionate for back home! I agreed because I dont feel like she should be penalized for our decision to move home. I was so keen for her to stay with us because I felt like she was family! Yesterday I mentioned moving back in a couple of months and she went very very quiet. Which usually means that she does when she does not want to do something. I called her out on it and she told me that she is not sure she wants to come with us. I dont mind that, but when was she going to tell me? On moving day? It really made me mad. I know she has the right to change her mind, BUT I have been so upfront with her and she knows it is hard to find good maids back home. The kicker is, her visa is up for renewal next month. I would have gladly paid all the fees even for just two months, but now I am wondering why I should do that? I would rather find another maid bring her here so DD can get to know her and she can be trained and then move back with us. Please dont flame me about the employer and employee relationship. Next time I wont cross that line. I have also noticed that for the last month or two she has stopped coming when I call her and every time my MIL has changed my instructions to her she follows my MIL's instructions and not mine even thought I asked her to request MIL to check with me. Now MIL calls her to ask her how DD is doing every day (really annoys me cause MIL is an annoying, obsessed lunatic). I am really annoyed at the moment. <em>edited by kcinthecity on 09/02/2011</em>
kcinthecity
231
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 08 February 2011 - 09:26
Not sure of the store you mention, but in Karama, opposite Adil and near the Lulu HYPERmarket, there are bunch of stores that sell mattresses. I have a vague memory of Silent Night being sold there when I was lookinf for mattresses.
kcinthecity
231
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 07 February 2011 - 14:24
Me too. DD needs more stimulation and loves being out.
kcinthecity
231
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 07 February 2011 - 14:09
I know what you mean LD. This whole actual vs. adjusted age is just tiring to think about. DD is going to a year old in two weeks, but not really (she will be 9.75 months!). My feeding schedule with her goes like this 1. Bf between 6 and 6.30 2. One more bf at 7.30 before I take off for work 3. Breakfast at 10.00 am followed by 60 mL foruma top up if she wants it 4. Lunch at 1.00 pm followed by formula top up 5. Bf between 4 and 4.30 followed by top up (if its at 4 then I offer a top up) 6. Dinner at 7.00 pm 7. Formula bottle at 8.30 and bed She does not sleep through the night, but does not get fed! So loosely doing the three hour thing. My supply had dropped quite a bit was not meeting DD's needs so I started to supplement and I have to say she is a lot happier and less cranky. I stopped pumping in December and could not be happier. In fact when she turns one, I will be dropping the 4 pm bf and replacing with formula and keeping only the morning feed as she seems to be too distracted to bf properly lately. I bought a deep freezer from Lulu that was a life saver. You can buy it off me if you like. Let me know. DD did not bf till she was home for 2 months (if I remember correctly, it was May and she came home early April).
kcinthecity
231
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 07 February 2011 - 13:04
I loved the video link. As for the article, ask me again in a few weeks... will be a SAHM and I am sure the job I hate so much right now will become a job I loved and left! I think what emerged out of both is that we do put a lot of pressure on ourself to say we LOVE being parents and love everything that goes with it (incl. bfing, spending all day with LO, activities, stimulating them - sometimes I just want to lie in bed and watch trashy TV). But I do hope there is a middle ground that I can find between being all Mummy and myself (frankly dont know who that is between crappy work and being mum). My main worry is loneliness as all the people I interact with are from work and I dont have too many friends outside of work. I hope it does not become a relationship killer as DH is worried that I will drive him demented being at home.
kcinthecity
231
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 07 February 2011 - 12:58
Hello. My DH's mother and father are like this all the time. We barely leave them and they call to ask us what we are doing. I dont think they realize that it suffocates or upsets us. DH finally had a gentle chat with his mum and it has stopped (although I am sure it is momentary), her repsonse was "I know, i am just getting old I guess"
kcinthecity
231
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 07 February 2011 - 11:24
Hey LD. Good news on the quick eating! I remember being super excited when DD took 20 mins to finish her bottle as opposed to the usual 40 min to 1 hr. The quanity I offered DD rapidly increased from 60 mL (when we brough her home) to 100 mL then 120 mL of EBM. She stayed at 120 mL per feed for the LONGEST time and now just about has 150mL of formula at her last feed at night. I also recommend pumping only once at night because I had a HUGE supply issue (too much milk) and ended up throwing a whole bunch out as apparently it does not last more than 6 months in the deep freeze. I also had too much lipase in my milk which made giving her defrosted milk a little tough (more on me than on her... she did not mind the disgusting taste).
kcinthecity
231
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 06 February 2011 - 13:14
DD has just started screaming for things when they are taken away from her. We usually give in. I think we are creating a terror!
kcinthecity
231
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 01 February 2011 - 15:02
Forever21. Greenish is so right, you are so strong for being able to share this and discuss it with us. Just reading your post made me choke up and unable to type. You are very very BRAVE. Crying is normal. When DD was in the NICU and having a tough time, anything would set me off. I cried in my gynaes office on two different ocassions. Big hugs and sending you lots of love.
kcinthecity
231
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 01 February 2011 - 13:13
Gleek... u sure its FoxSports (crossing fingers)? DH almost had a meltdown when OSN stopped broadcasting ESPN! I cant remember the no. of times I have been kicked out of bed to check online for game updates when DH is travelling.
kcinthecity
231
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 01 February 2011 - 13:03
Dont know where you are located, but I do know that Welcare knowledge Village do a well person check up. That or you could just find a lab and ask them to do a Complete Blood Count and a lipid profile. There is a lab on the junction of Umm Suqeim Road and Al Khail Road (I forget the name).
kcinthecity
231
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 31 January 2011 - 15:22
Bump. Need to bundle DH off.
kcinthecity
231
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 31 January 2011 - 12:27
Thank you thank you thank you Crankypants!
kcinthecity
231
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 31 January 2011 - 12:08
Would love to get some advice TanyaR. Can we take this discussion off EW. Do let me know your email add. THanks <em>edited by kcinthecity on 31/01/2011</em>
kcinthecity
231
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 31 January 2011 - 09:52
Lol. Thanks H.A.K. Funnily enough, he just called me after a particularly nasty spat where he told me I was allowing myself to be kicked around. He said... Do what makes you happy, I support you!
kcinthecity
231
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 31 January 2011 - 09:40
You know, Dubai made me sullen and aggressive and no matter what the cause, I hold myself responsible for being a rude and mean person. I was ashamed at myself when I behaved badly especially with people in a 'lower position' than I was; and have consciously made an effort to behave like a decent, civilized human being. People in Dubai do treat wait staff and others as worthless. It makes me cringe and is frankly embarassing to be around. I would much much rather have someone singsong nicely to me than a shop assistant who treats me like dirt (MAC artists in particular), even then I am civil to them. This is how I was raised to behave and if I cannot manage basic civility then frankly it is just disguisting. edited by kcinthecity on 31/01/2011 <em>edited by kcinthecity on 31/01/2011</em>
kcinthecity
231
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 31 January 2011 - 09:04
Thank you for the wonderfully honest replies. I truly appreciate the insight. I have realized that I cannot do everything. However, I also know that if I were happier at work, I would still be trying to make everything work. DH has not been supportive of my quitting and although he has not come out and said it, I think he is worried financially. He says that I should stand up for myself and not be bullied into leaving. My concern is that he will become all macho and whatnot once I quit. I am still completely lost as to what I should do.
kcinthecity
231
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 31 January 2011 - 08:42
Saw it in CHoithrams at Safa two days ago. The other place to try is LuLu in Karama, I see it there often.
kcinthecity
231
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 30 January 2011 - 15:23
The problem is that Emaar told us when we moved in that these keys cannot be remade. I already replaced the front door locks with a much cheaper one and it broke my heart because the quality of the original locks was far superior. I just want to use the same company so it is the same product. I think I might have to go Downtown to speak with the Property Department. Thanks tho.
kcinthecity
231
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 30 January 2011 - 15:18
Thanks for the comments so far. Scary decision LD: After what we through with DD, I dont know if I want to have a repeat with baby2. Will need a lot of convincing and vino to get me try again!
kcinthecity
231
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 30 January 2011 - 14:44
Love my Bugaboo Bee. Its nice and light (back problems so the fact that it weighs only 7 kgs is wonderful), so easy to use. Only negative is that the seat is a bit low. We travelled with it and absolutely love it.
kcinthecity
231
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 30 January 2011 - 13:55
I hear you. Although I do work so I get out of the house, but once I am back home I do everything everything everything. We are talking about planning for No. 2. I just dont know how we can do it. DH and I have started to call each other mommy and daddy!!!!!!!!!!!!
kcinthecity
231
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 30 January 2011 - 12:56
Maybe I am just reading too much into DD's actions, but DD is 11 months old and indicates that she wants to potty by flaring her nostrils and making a clear grunting sound (not very ladylike), we strip off her nappy and she poops in the potty and then tries to stand up when she is done. If she does not want to potty, then no matter how hard we try, she does not sit down on the potty. She does still poo in her nappy from time to time, but it is an exception rather than the rule. I believe on some level she understands the need to poo in the potty because she gives us her nose flare and grunt and then waits till we put her on the potty. only if we miss the sign or do not respond fast enough does she go ahead and poo in her nappy and then screams till she gets changed. We started doing this when she was 7 months old and it took us about 3 weeks to get her signals. I know that we still do ALL the work, but I really hope that it is a foundation for the future.
kcinthecity
231
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 30 January 2011 - 12:30
I am so sorry for your loss. Keeping you and your family in my prayers.
kcinthecity
231
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 26 January 2011 - 13:24
Argh never get involved in this but could not bite my tongue. Salome... no disrespect meant, but from your posts it seems that what you term inaccurate comments and facts is when others do not agree with you. I might be wrong here apologies if I am, but this is honestly how it comes across. As a comeback to the article, I have a wonderful housekeeper who everyone will call a maid, but she is my family who loves DD and takes very good care of her because I need to work to keep our heads above water. MIL is around a LOT to help out but my housekeeper does sometimes take care of DD alone. Once I return home, I do everything for DD. Now, from the outside it seems to everyone that I am a lazy parent because I have help from my MIL and housekeeper, BUT I do find motherhood extremely challenging, especially balancing a job I do not like and my health problems. Also in response to ivfuae, we almost lost DD as she came at 31 weeks and had IVH (minor but still there)... she is also very precious to me but I have to work ... what can I do? I can also assure you that I am a very involved and attentive mother and that my child is thriving and gives me great joy every single moment I am with her. Too many ppl here seem to know what the gold standard for motherhood should be (like the article) and lose no time in criticizing and judging women who have help raising their kids. Why? Why should we always beat ourselved up for asking for and getting help? Yes I can do EVERYTHING on my own, but its just not feasible. I have accepted I am not superwoman (i know quite a few of them) and have reached out for help so my kid gets the best of me and my time and I can meet her needs both financially and emotionally. Edited for bad grammar <em>edited by kcinthecity on 26/01/2011</em>
kcinthecity
231
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 26 January 2011 - 13:10
Hi meals. How long till baby is full term? I was not offering DD top ups because I bottlefed her till she managed to latch and drink on her own. She managed to maintain three hour gaps so I assumed she was getting enough. I suggest (just for one feed) not topping up and seeing how long he will go before he gets hungry. But I highly recommend waiting till he is full term (so he is big enough and has the energy to do it, that is my reasoning anyway and it might not be accurate). I did not push DD (31 weeks) into full bfing till she was 4 weeks past full term. At that time she was tough enough (compared to before) to handle it. HTH
kcinthecity
231
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 24 January 2011 - 15:29
Have a friend going through something similar. I sent her to Dr. Rajkumar at Unicare in Burjuman. The Dr. ran some blood tests and a urine test, but I dont know what happened after that. I know also that there is a preemie formula (Enfacare or something like that) that adds extra calories to babies diets. I know its crazy trying to get them to take formula, my DD tried 5 or 6 diff ones before she settled on Apatamil. My DD also went through a 'bottle rejection' phase and what worked for me was holding her in the same position as bfing her and putting in the bottle like it was my b00b.
kcinthecity
231
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 20 January 2011 - 11:28
Thanks DC for the offer. Appreciate it but I think I am going to let her take her time. She also manages to escape from the bumbo (her cousin has one) by twisting herself to the side and pulling one leg out so she falls over. She does not mind sitting, its the sitting up she cant do. Last night, she brought her butt up when she army crawled and then managed to pull up in the crib from sitting position! I was so excited. Its almost like she does something new to reassure me when I get worried (probably saying "You are soooo paranoid mum"). I think I might give her some more time to get it all sorted (she turns one in 4 weeks) before I push the ped for a PT recommendation.
kcinthecity
231
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 20 January 2011 - 09:06
Having the same probs with mine. She used to go down at 8.30 or 9 pm and give me till 5 am. But now is up multiple times and wont sleep until fed. Hope she grows out of it. No teeth yet either.
kcinthecity
231
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 18 January 2011 - 14:05
Thank you ladies for the reassurance. I am enjoying her immensely especially has she seems to be such a determined little baby with tons of personality at this point. I just want to help her along the way if she needs it.
 
 
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