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summerdream

summerdream
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Latest post on 28 November 2011 - 18:01
Having said what I have about allergies...I don't mind a small cupcake or a mini chocolate that parent's send it as long as it doesn't have nuts put in. DD since the age of 3 doesn't mind that everybody gets to eat it and she can't (given the risk of cross contamination and a just in case) Having more active lifestyles take care of the extra calories...well maybe I am justifying it because of my sweet tooth! Then again I can down a few bars of chocos a day and still remain my UK6 :p
summerdream
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Latest post on 28 November 2011 - 17:51
I am for the ban. Between 24 kids in the class, birthday parties on the weekends, Halloween, Christmas, Valentine's days, After school bake sales/fundraisers,neighbour's houses, kids at school buying junk at the cafeteria and sharing etc etc, my kids get offered junk at least three - four times a week from people other than us. Kids are getting fatter, less active, and Diabetes is escalating.I think it is fine for my kids to have a treat once or twice a week as a TREAT and we the treat is to be decided by us. I do not want someone else deciding to fill my kids up on junk in school and then yes they come home with an uneaten lunch that has to be tossed. Sometimes they come home from parties with party bags that have enough candy in them for 3 months. If you cannot afford a party for 24 kids then just have 3 of the best friends over for some cake and a movie. Simple. Regarding allergies, I think some posters think the nut allergy thing is a fad or a joke. I find the nut bans a royal pain in the a** but I try to put myself in those parents shoes- Nut anaphylaxis can be instant, and a child can be dead within 2-3 minutes. I have seen a reaction and hope to G*d I never see one again. Yes when kids get older they need to be aware and learn to avoid other people's food, but the little ones will not be able to do this. What are you teaching your kids when you say " I don't see why 23 kids have to be inconvienienced for the sake of 1 kid (Who might DIE- terrible inconienience I guess)- you are teaching them they must get immediate gratification of their wants and needs without Empathy or consideration for others. Nice. Thank you Sue for your message. This thread has had me panicked now wondering if my DD has parents like some posters on here who think their child should not miss out on normal life(!), they should not have to put up with the hassle or compare it to other conditions like falling ill. Nut allergies can have your child's classmate DEAD is 2-3 minutes. I don't know how normal your child would be after realising that they inadvertently became the source of taking their classmates life. For those who do not know better, please know it now - This is not a fad. I have had relatives nearly kill my DD not knowing the seriousness of her condition. Edited to add - my post reads angry its not - just very concerned. <em>edited by summerdream on 28/11/2011</em>
summerdream
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Latest post on 28 November 2011 - 17:43
I am not sure when the trend for cakes started ... but when I was a kid about 20 yrs back, children did bring in little toffees and chocolates as birthday treats. And IMO there is absolutely no harm in a little treat once in a while! As about children with allergies, dont you think it would be too much to ask 25 children to adjust for one child? DS is restricted from things like cold drinks and swimming, as he suffers from severe case of tonsilitis and everytime he catches a sniffle he ends up with white pus filled patches on his tonsils leaving the little fellow in severe pain. They have a weekly pool day in nursery and he is the only child who has to sit in the class while other kids enjoy their time in the pool (and DS loves swimming). I wish they banned swimming in the nursery ... not. I would be selfish if I wished that! All due respect, I agree about the cake thing too. A piece of cake is fine as a treat, I have no issue with that! But I do think 25 children need to adjust to one child's need if it is an allergy, as that can be life threatening!!! I would be more than happy for my DD to "adjust" for this reason! *like* exactly my take. Happy for DD to have a chocolate/cake slice - just keep reminding parents about her allergies. Although it seems like overkill, we have started getting a permission form sent in advance when a parent is to send a cake to school. I simply send a small packaged chocolate which is distributed end of day so parents can decide. I know there are no kids with milk allergies in DD's class - hence plain milkchocolate is what I normally do.
summerdream
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Latest post on 28 November 2011 - 17:38
I am not sure when the trend for cakes started ... but when I was a kid about 20 yrs back, children did bring in little toffees and chocolates as birthday treats. And IMO there is absolutely no harm in a little treat once in a while! As about children with allergies, dont you think it would be too much to ask 25 children to adjust for one child? DS is restricted from things like cold drinks and swimming, as he suffers from severe case of tonsilitis and everytime he catches a sniffle he ends up with white pus filled patches on his tonsils leaving the little fellow in severe pain. They have a weekly pool day in nursery and he is the only child who has to sit in the class while other kids enjoy their time in the pool (and DS loves swimming). I wish they banned swimming in the nursery ... not. I would be selfish if I wished that! Hiccup, maybe you don't appreciate have severe allergies can be. My DD apart from her allergies also cannot swim most of the time (unless its peak summer) due to tonsils (that grew back after a tonilectomy!) and other issues like her catching a cold very easily and it going straight down to her lungs and her ending up in ER with collapsed lungs. I of course do not wish they ban swimming in schools for this reason. Its different with allergies - I don't know if you realise if a child with severe allergies like my DD sniffs in a particle of peanut she could go into shock and if not administered her injection in a minute or so could die. If one has eaten something that contains nuts with one's hands and wiped of their hands, held my daughter's hand, her arm has swollen up at times. There's at least 3 student's in DD's school within the primary section that I know of with a similair level of allergy, so its not as rare.
summerdream
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Latest post on 28 November 2011 - 16:29
Dr Carlos at the American Hospital is an allergy specialist. Having said that what finally got my DD's eczema in control is a food intolerance test at the Dubai Herbal Treatment Centre. Saw Dr Brenda Saunders there.
summerdream
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Latest post on 28 November 2011 - 15:10
Slightly off the point but does anyone know what causes all these allergies? When I was at school there were no rules on nuts, diary ect and no-one I know had any issue with certain food groups, so just wondering how come these days so many children seem to be affected by this? Because those with severe allergies were not recognised in good time, had reactions and died off. Seriously - this is not a new thing. Those with less severe forms of allergies, just suffered from the reactions. I think of a distant aunt who died suddenly gasping for air and the belief was black magic killed her... As much as I have researched severe food allergies have been around forever. My DD has it from birth.
summerdream
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Latest post on 28 November 2011 - 14:02
I do understand your point about life threatening allergies and the ban on nuts, but surely that child is at risk at every lunch time then? And in most schools the kids eat in a common canteen so there is always risk of being exposed to these allergens. How many ways can we protect them without stepping on the rights of other children to have a normal childhood? Sparked, this message of yours surprises me. How is a child with nut allergies at risk at lunch everytime? Nuts are NOT allowed in a child's lunch box or in school canteens. How many ways can we protect a child with life threatening nut allergies you ask? In how many ever ways possible! Even before I had my DD with severe nut allergies - I remember understanding what life-threaterning allergy meant and if it meant my older DD could not have her peanut butter sandwhich in school, I would compromise on that part of a normal childhood - so as to reduce the risk of killing another's child! A note has been sent to all parents of my DDs classmates about her nut and sesame seed severe allergy and how I pray that some parent is not thinking of their child's 'rights' to a 'normal' childhood.
summerdream
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Latest post on 16 November 2011 - 16:48
Can't offer help with details unfortunatley, but I know of someone who's had success with Dr Pankaj, she doesn't live here anymore. I also knew a medical secretary who used to work for him and she always spoke very highly of him. Good luck.
summerdream
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Latest post on 03 November 2011 - 10:39
Chill or Chillax or the like when used in response to someone's genuinely difficult situation. For example, when I was trying to get out of a mad, abusive, empty marriage and hit roadblocks that meant further delays or possibly the divorce not coming thru and a good friend's response would be 'Chill'
summerdream
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Latest post on 20 October 2011 - 12:52
Visa in advance needed
summerdream
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Latest post on 12 October 2011 - 15:21
Summerdream this is also a lot of pressure/responsibility for you - it would probably be best to call the recommended numbers and speak to someone - at least you are covered then in the event of anything untoward, that you did the right thing. Hugs to you and your poor friend. :( Sorry, didn't write other details as been stressed. Have done all else possible, let key family know, scheduled her to see her doc again and put some support system in place.
summerdream
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Latest post on 12 October 2011 - 15:14
I just got confirmation from a doc that Rashid Hospital is best equipped and where she should go. No police report will be made, unless she has actually attempted suicide. She's rather strong and keeps telling me she's knows its just the chemical deficiency in her head and will feel better soon. She's assured me - she will take a taxi to Rashid if she feels that way again.
summerdream
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Latest post on 12 October 2011 - 15:03
Thanks all. Would anybody know specifically about Rashid Hospital? She's already on meds etc and seeing docs, but I think will have to be hospitalised so she doesn't do anything. I believe she has rapid cycling bi-polar or depression that dips severely and suddenly or something like that, she's okay now - but I have received calls twice this week, asking me to just remain on the phone line, hoping the feeling would pass, but today she was terrible and unable to normalise for a few hours - she just kept saying her head is asking her to end the pain. <em>edited by summerdream on 12/10/2011</em>
summerdream
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Latest post on 11 October 2011 - 13:34
Have plenty of family/friends who have delivered at the American Hospital - all of them very happy with the care. Most agree, they wouldn't have been as 'spoilt' in their home countries. Good luck. X
summerdream
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Latest post on 11 October 2011 - 13:27
Bur Dubai, i.e. the Mankhool part of Bur Dubai (behind Bur Juman) is at the moment priced higher than Barsha, Tecom etc. OH hated Bur Dubai from a distance, but once he moved, he started liking the place quite a bit. Its got easy access to lots of things and more affordable supermarkets around like Lulu, Carefour etc. Lots of restaurants... Any the best deal for a Bur Dubai for a long stayer is AED7500 for a 1-br/month. Most are at least 8,500 per month. Studios are of course cheaper. Anything cheaper would be dirty and dingy. Grandmidwest is a s**t hole - don't stay there at all Fortune hotel apartments behind ADCB, I found the best value for money. If you have a budget of about 10k pr month a new service apartment called M (I think) is very nice. Old Town would not fit in the 6k budget polly - not even a studio. I doubt Jumeirah/Business bay would either. There are some buildings in Tecom area that are for 6K per month, payable monthly but annual contracts.
summerdream
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Latest post on 11 October 2011 - 10:16
What area are you looking at? Have done loads of looking around, comparing and research for Barsha and Bur Dubai - so could recommend..
summerdream
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Latest post on 10 October 2011 - 10:24
Older DD had them about 1.5 - 2 years of age when she had a fixed sleep schedule and the one off day where we disturbed that by taking her out. All episodes of ours I related to her being overtired - either mentally (seeing too many people/new faces/over stimulated) or physically. When that was sorted the night terrors sorted too.
summerdream
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Latest post on 10 October 2011 - 09:37
Thank you Gaby... Thanks ACB will call you, that's so nice of you Thanks all :)
summerdream
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Latest post on 09 October 2011 - 13:29
DD will be turning 6 soon and I see the signs, getting worse by the day. Her paediatrician didn't have a recommended psychologist but agrees that she needs to be assessed. Someone who is good with kids assesment overall would be good - as there are other issues that I would like to address - I can't point a finger, but something has not felt right from when she's little. Any recommendations from personal experience? PS - Sorry but those who don't think ADD is a condition that can be diagnosed in a child of this age, kindly leave those suggestions out of this thread - I read some comments on old threads while searching for references. Bad Parenting, bad diet can worsen ADD - but not bring it about. I know as I have the condition and remember having my ADD mind from my earliest memories when I was about 1.5 years old. I appreciate the difference between a child who is being a child and someone who is struggling with a cluttered mind, unable to follow 2 step processes even. Am stressed already, because I know how my severe form has crippled my entire life and I am fortunate to be gifted + ADD. DD is not gifted. Its so painful to see her struggle.
summerdream
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Latest post on 22 September 2011 - 15:25
Entertainer voucher can be used here?
summerdream
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Latest post on 22 September 2011 - 13:02
and if you don't have med insurance, this is a simple test that will be done in most clinics. Prime medical is reasonably priced and the results of this test are not complicated, so doesn't matter where you do, except you'll be sitting in the clinic for a while. If the clinic you refer to are a weight loss clinic let me know - I know why they don't bother recommending GTT. You are right you do need a GTT.
summerdream
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Latest post on 12 September 2011 - 13:36
Thanks Dubai Cat, you have a good memory! I have received calls from so many banks don't listen for long enough to remember the bank names! I don't do loans is my standard reply. Now that I am trying to help, there's been no calls for a month! I am trying to avoid the homework of researching from scratch. So wondered if someone's got interest rates, charges, features charted out. This is a different topic, but I think I need to focus on getting my own stuff a bit too! I always find myself having the drive to help out but endlessly procrastinate my own stuff :( I am so good at doing that. Spent the whole summer helping other people out and did b*gger all myself! Perhaps just give your friend a list of recommendations on here and let her do the research? :D if I leave it to her nothing will get done - left it to her for a year! I have had to hold a friend's hand while he cut up his credit cards. Then again, just this morning my ex called to say Thanks! Reason: He had just paid his credit card bill in full and remembered the financial mess he was in before we married, which I helped sort.
summerdream
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Latest post on 12 September 2011 - 13:31
Thanks will look that up. Just on this note, its so sad when I see people in huge credit card debt. I see the pain in their eyes when they pay the minimum due which just about cover their interest! Banks make enough money already!! I sometimes wish I could sit down with them and help if possible. As a mum, its something I have already taught my 9 and 5 year old on.
summerdream
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Latest post on 12 September 2011 - 13:24
Thanks Dubai Cat, you have a good memory! I have received calls from so many banks don't listen for long enough to remember the bank names! I don't do loans is my standard reply. Now that I am trying to help, there's been no calls for a month! I am trying to avoid the homework of researching from scratch. So wondered if someone's got interest rates, charges, features charted out. This is a different topic, but I think I need to focus on getting my own stuff a bit too! I always find myself having the drive to help out but endlessly procrastinate my own stuff :(
summerdream
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Latest post on 12 September 2011 - 12:54
Was recommended tend skin on here - bought it, love it! Got mine from the UK, couldn't find locally.
summerdream
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Latest post on 08 September 2011 - 14:14
In Karama you should be able to get a good one for 40-50, I take my own shampoo. This Toni & Lee place in Bybylos hotel, Tecom charge about 60 still I think. I go to Cutting Edge, DIFC. {The previous owner (MAH Centre) ran away leaving members of other branches in lurch, as MAH only managed to sell this branch. Not the new owners fault of course. } I only pay about 250 per month for 4 blowdries + colour.
summerdream
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Latest post on 07 September 2011 - 16:01
My OH is convinced that they ask for nationality on lotto tickets because it plays a factor in your chances... Of course it does. If you're a westerner - forget it. You only have to look at the winners for National Bonds to see that. Even the mall draws & win-a-car are rigged I believe........... had a friend (westerner) who had a HUGGGGGGEEEEEEE sum invested in NB (he took it out a while ago) as over three years he won 100 dirhams in the draws (plus the 'profit' (interest) rate). I only have a little over a 100k in there and I was just checking have won AED7200 in bits in 3 years. There's one win of a 1000, two 500's and the rest 200 or 100's. Do you suppose they are picking out by name because I hold an Indian passport? Mall draws often rigged - but more because of the way staff handle it. Staff put 1000's of their own tickets in there. Draws are conducted by the Minstry officials usually in public. National bonds draw programming has been independently verified. Maybe I am a tad lucky - but in recent years after winning a few 1000's and a few items here and there, two of my friends have one a million dirham each, a friend has won a car and then there's loads of those who won smaller items, I realise that this rigging claim is only because we don't win!!
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Latest post on 07 September 2011 - 10:55
Indians tend to win too - again because Indians do have trust in the country and invest here and many retain their salaries/savings here as opposed to the typical Western expat. Wrong. Some Indians, particularly businessmen and 2nd generation expats retain money here. Many others remit everything that they save to theit extended family back home. So we cant say "Indians retain their salaries here" I said 'many Indians retain their salary' not All! I am Indian so I know. I am not talking about labourers and those working in junior positions or those here for short term. Anyway this is not about retaining salaries! Ask National Bonds for statistics of nationality.
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Latest post on 07 September 2011 - 10:44
My OH is convinced that they ask for nationality on lotto tickets because it plays a factor in your chances... Of course it does. If you're a westerner - forget it. You only have to look at the winners for National Bonds to see that. That thought is tunnel visioned. Its the locals who have huge investments in National Bonds, Dubai bank Kunooz draws etc, simple maths their chances are much higher. Indians tend to win too - again because Indians do have trust in the country and invest here and many retain their salaries/savings here as opposed to the typical Western expat. Edited to add - this is not just an assumption, for instance all my Indian, Pakistani friends/relatives seem to have national bonds, any Indian/Pakistani colleague that the topic may have come up with has them! A local friend has bonds in millions and wins every single week. The Western friends - Australian, loads of English, American have either not heard of it or not bought any. <em>edited by summerdream on 07/09/2011</em>
summerdream
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Latest post on 06 September 2011 - 11:49
Tickles and Giggles in JBR. They do a kids chocolate facial (just put chocolate yoghurt on their faces really!) and mani-pedis too - was a fun time for my girls and was happy with the haircut and dry.
summerdream
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Latest post on 05 September 2011 - 15:33
Scenario 2 - Magically tie the bell with a large bucket of water.. he dings the ding dong, the icy cold water (put some ice cube) falls on his head, he will be upset that you ruined his clothes , he will never ring the bell again . (of course, he might think that it’s a great place to get a shower everyday before work so this scenario has its drawback) edited by amalwaleed on 05/09/2011 Princess still waiting to learn how your labourer admirer afforded the diamond and RW Watch..... Am curious did you keep the gifts? This is Dubai - more likely to boil him :)
summerdream
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Latest post on 05 September 2011 - 12:12
City hospital standards have dropped in general and someone very close nearly died because of the radiologist not being available, the stupid GP having no idea what he was saying, not calling a Gynae for an emergency case....to top it off, when the patient had emergency surgery and been saved in a govt hospital and was recovering there about 3 days later she gets a call asking if the patient would like to schedule an ultrasound the following day. They knew it was an emergency!!! I have had some very bad experience recently myself.
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Latest post on 05 September 2011 - 12:09
Princess - Are you sure he was a labourer - Diamond ring, Raymond Weil watch??!?!? OP - I would open the door, when DH is at home and politely ask him not to ring the bell again as you are busy at home. Asking DH to do it could be miscontrued as DH being jealous about your 'relationship' with him. Coming from a more conservative culture myself and having been here all my life I can bet this is the more likely thought if your DH speaks to him - whether or not he does it again, I don't think you would want him to have that thought. It seems you have never tried simply telling him. Why would you want to scowl etc? He's just taken you for the nice lady on the block and you need to explain what you don't want.
summerdream
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Latest post on 18 August 2011 - 13:43
Mom of two - you should have had 10 year old grandchildren by now then! ;)
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Latest post on 18 August 2011 - 12:57
Sorry to digress but Your mum's 37!!! So at 35 I am almost your mum's age :\: ...wow I feel old now
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Latest post on 17 August 2011 - 15:53
and thumbs down for those who smoke in the ill-ventilated basements of buildings, first thing when I arrive I get a dose of cig smoke and was terribly ill the first 4 days of Ramadan due to my allergies. Had to go on meds, but still feel sick every morning as I arrive and as I leave end of day. What happens about the choice of non-smokers :( Bad karma will follow each of the smokers in building basements! :)
summerdream
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Latest post on 17 August 2011 - 15:04
You will have to go to the humanatarian section of the immigration department and present the case as it is. Give it a shot they will guide you. BTW at below 60 - your granmum is very young! Dont forget to look at the full scenario in terms of medical expenses/insurance etc
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Latest post on 17 August 2011 - 14:57
PS - The one case I know of (not directly) where both parents died, they allowed the child to stay with their family friends (not related). As the child seemed comfortable, they really don't throw kids in orphanages. I have assigned a family member who stays in the UAE too in case their father and I were to die. Have put those papers along with divorce file in Dubai courts and kept a copy at home.
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Latest post on 17 August 2011 - 14:29
I have been here all of my life and unfortunately seen a few expat families (different nationalities) loose the male head of household. Not a single one has issues with child custody. As someone else has stated here its if both parents die and even then its only temporary till someone from the family flies in. Yes, your husband is right - your worry is paranoia. When it comes to money, wills done properly are very important
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Latest post on 17 August 2011 - 11:49
Hope you are on your way to recovery. It seems you do not have medical insurance. If so, I would recommend if you need hospitalisation to go to goverment hospital Rashid/Dubai Hospital. It works out substantially cheaper and they have more experience handling these cases. eta: Anyway given you don't seem too bad at the moment, it may be resolved at home with a good course of antibiotics prescribed from a doc who knows what he she is doing. <em>edited by summerdream on 17/08/2011</em>
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Latest post on 16 August 2011 - 13:46
That's two of us now saying the same - go to a hospital ASAP.
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Latest post on 16 August 2011 - 13:45
You may know that this condition can be fatal if left to itself. I know because I nearly died of it years ago - as I had reached the stage where I had the highest fevers possible in a human being (!) and chills and the infection had got into my blood. An indication to you if it is this is may be if you have had urine infection (burning etc) that you have left untreated. Its usually this that leads to the infection. Please go to a hospital. I was diagnosed at Rashid and transferred to Dubai hospital for recovery. Don't get to my stage I spent almost 2 weeks in hospital.
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Latest post on 16 August 2011 - 12:56
Excuse unsolicited advice, but Hello again kitty is completely right. Take this from a mum who's exclusively breast fed. We are not heaven sent. The more you feed, the more milk you will have - there are some medical conditions (rare)where this does not apply and these conditions don't resolve with concoctions anyway. The best thing to do is to drop an ocassional formula bottle you may be giving and baby will keep sucking more and your breast feed will adjust. The worse thing to do for a mom who intends to exclusively breastfed is to give in to pressure from well-meaning others and give the baby a bottle of formula. It will drop your supply.
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Latest post on 11 August 2011 - 11:58
Its not legal to have a business without a trade licence. Cooking and baking for family and friends is not illegal either. If I cooked for my friend and she paid me for the ingredients, cost of cooking etc in a lumpsum that should not concern any authorities. Most people only do it for friends and referred friends.
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Latest post on 10 August 2011 - 16:15
It is also illegal to house a male in your premises to whom you are not married to, but I am sure most of us had friends from home visiting and sleeping on our sofas? Do not be that rigid, that couple consider doing something human and nice with people who are poor and powerless. Unmarried couples living in together are illegal too and so is s#x outside marriage and the punishment for all this is also quite bad - jail/deportation. It happens and the authorities are aware. The real issue with hiring a maid illegally is if she is in the country illegally. When someone is caught hiring a maid who is on husband's visa they are very often let off with a warning max. Giving them a home in your maid's room if the OP's friend is comfortable with it is a small issue, the on paper technicality of letting a males stay is a non-issue too - unless you are really unlucky. As long as there is trust rightly placed and an arrangement agreed, for instance in case of a check, the maid does not need to say she works as a maid! She has her legal papers, id etc. As for a check at home I have never heard happening in people's homes. The police don't want to disturb families.
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Latest post on 10 August 2011 - 12:08
What a load of baloney. If that was true, generations of our ancestors (including most of our parents) would be similarly traumatised as corporal punishment was the norm in schools until relatively recently (certainly when I was at school and I'm in my 40s). Excuses, excuses, excuses. Men bearing "disobedient" women was also the norm in many countries, and still is in some. When you teach kids that the only way to stop them doing something is beating them black and blue, they may very well grow up thinking its ok to beat their kids and if necessary, their wives I was not supposed to write any more, but yes Arch I have always asked the question - why is it wrong to some when wives get beaten, but not wrong to beat a child who really can't defend himself? Women need discipling and so do our men - those who support corporal punishment I hope you agree! A child is supposed to feel secure and protected and home and school.
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Latest post on 10 August 2011 - 12:00
I personally don't know one person who's become better as a result of corporal punishment - most of them just got more and more immune and chose to lash out further on where they could Yes, it's one of the great myths of school corporal punishment that fear of it kept everyone in line. It might have kept all the basically good kids in line, but they were never the problem anyway. The real-world evidence - and this has been formally studied, and played a large part in the abolition of corporal punishment in 1986 - confirms that it made no difference to the real problem kids, because their names kept cropping up in school punishment books again and again and again. They clearly weren't scared of corporal punishment, because they kept ending up in trouble and kept being punished for it. These are the types of people who end up as rioters. Agreed and I won't answer again, as I don't want to digress the topic. but Arch has got the point - allow it and people use it to vent their personal frusturation, yes I was beaten till I nearly bled by teachers for things like not being able to memorise a definition word to word. I would want to beat up these Yobs big time - but that's not anywhere hoping it would change them. <em>edited by summerdream on 10/08/2011</em>
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EW EXPLORER
Latest post on 10 August 2011 - 11:58
Corporal punishment as children have ruined the lives of several people I know. I myself suffer severely to date. Its trigerred life time depression, bipolar and other illnesses in people I know very closely. :( Sorry but how on earth did being disciplined cause you to be bipolar? Not me - but someone I know and their doctor has explained how bipolar can be triggered with abuse. There's a thin line between corporal punishment and child abuse. Generations earlier too sufferred due to hitting and belting - they just kept mum about it. My 89 year old grandmother finally opened out to me how it still hurts her, my dad born in the 40's who was belted and belted became a person full of rage as a result and thought its okay to belt 4 year olds. It is violence. As I said if you haven't been beaten everyday at school, beaten every day at home you wouldn't know. For a child home is where he is supposed to be secure. Maybe I am talking more about abuse, less corporal punishment - but where do you draw the line. My ex as much as a sorry case he is I agree with one thing he says, if beating sorted children, he would have been the best person around. I think all that violence at home and school only made him a more violent person. He resolved all his problems as an adult too with violence for instance.
summerdream
407
Posts
EW EXPLORER
Latest post on 10 August 2011 - 11:50
Know of several people who have done or do just what your friend is about to do. I am talking about some senior people doing this. I even know the MD of a huge company who does that. The maid and husband live in their maid room outisde the main villa. If the maid is on her husband's visa that cuts down risks dramatically. So she is not a runner from somewhere and I know of cases where the family is even left of the hook as they haven't hired an 'illegal' worker. End of the day it is illegal - but maybe your friend has been around for long and understands what works and doesn't. Of course if they stole something etc your friend has no cover. There are risks and if your friend is okay with it - let her be! It can be annoying to have well-meaning friends hound one endlessly on a decision taken.
summerdream
407
Posts
EW EXPLORER
Latest post on 10 August 2011 - 11:39
Well IMO the PC brigade actually have a lot to do with these riots - perhaps if teachers were able to discipline children, if the police could actually prosecute, if people could protect their homes without fear of being prosecuted themselves.... if everyone didn't have an overly inflated sense of their "rights" and a hugely overly inflated sense of intittlement then perhaps people would have enough of a moral compass not to think it's ok to burn down buildings and loot things. Who though says these kids even bother to go to school, they really don't know how lucky they are, government provided education! These are the lot that "leave" school with maths and english skills at the level of a 4 year old. some of these kids are as young as 9 yrs old!! Where the F*%$# are their parents? It boils down to school education and going back to grass roots! I went to a Government school and then Private boarding school, had corporal punishment in each of them and did me NO harm what so ever! I was threatened with the strap once and that was enough for me! Sorry I am not a believer of "We have to tell them we love them" Belt them and belt them again if they're naughty and lets hope the next generation of kids will turn out better. Everyone is given free education in Britain, there is no excuse for illiteracy when so many poor disadvantaged kids in Africa, India, Afganistan etc would give anything to be in school and perhaps better themselves and provide for their families in the future. Corporal punishment didn't do you any harm you say - good for you - I hope you don't mete it out to your kids. Corporal punishment as children have ruined the lives of several people I know. I myself suffer severely to date. Its trigerred life time depression, bipolar and other illnesses in people I know very closely. These conditions, these situations one can only understand when its part of one's life. I don't expect you to understand. I personally don't know one person who's become better as a result of corporal punishment - most of them just got more and more immune and chose to lash out further on where they could. Sorry to digress from the thread - but I had to give my two cents on your need to belt them again and again. :(
 
 
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