You poor thing. What you're feeling is normal in the context that many new mothers feel the same. Having suffered with pre-natal and post-natal depression with both my children, I can totally empathise with your feelings. If you don't feel like you can talk to your mother or husband in the first instance, I would definitely make an appointment with GP to get yourself assessed for PND. One step at a time but she/he will be able to direct and advise you, hopefully. good luck and realise that nobody is judging you or doubting your love for your baby. We are here for you.
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