14 month old and bedtime

Is there a reason why you want to drop the night feed before the morning feed? I'm just wondering (since I'm assuming you are in the process of weaning completel)y if maybe it would be easier to drop the morning feed first? and then slowly (over the next few weeks) drop the night feed the way I suggested below (gradually move it further away from bedtime each day and then drop completely). Also maybe you could BF and then give him to your DH to put to bed so he is used to the idea of being put to bed by someone different, even if you stay in the room as well. Its obvious he is having a tough time with this transition which isn't nice for anyone. As you might have figured, I'm not so keen on the crying-based solutions if avoidable (they seem more of a last resort than a first option to me). If you don't want to do the gentle wean from the breastfeed, here is a link to 2 techniques which studies have shown to be just as effective as the ferber technique (controlled crying) and don't involve leaving your baby alone to cry. Not trying to be pushy, just giving you options since the crying is obviously stressful for you as well as your baby. http://www.parentingscience.com/infant-sleep-training.html [i'>Extinction with parental presence With this approach to infant sleep training, you put your baby to bed while he’s still awake, and you lie down with him until he falls asleep. However, you pay progressively less attention to him each night. For instance, after a few days, you might touch the baby less often. A few days after that, you might look away more often, and sit up in bed rather than remain lying down. The next step is to sit at a chair alongside the bed, and the step after that is to move the chair a bit farther away. You can read or do some other silent activity while you keep up your vigil. By making these gradual changes, the baby is weaned from extensive parental soothing rituals. After several days, you might try leaving the room for a few seconds, returning before the baby starts to cry. This may help the baby learn that you can be trusted to return after an absence (Skuladottir 2003). But you remain in the baby’s presence until he falls asleep.[/i'> <em>edited by kiwispiers on 20/01/2012</em>

It really sounds like he's not ready to give up that special time with you before bed!

Don't know how you feel about bottle feeding, but our toddler son has had a bottle of milk before going to bed far past his second birthday. The sucking itself makes him sleepy. Of course if your little one is not used to bottles, that might not be the solution. Perhaps some milk in a sippy cup? Remember that this is also a source of liquid I agree though that I wouldn't go back to your old routine as it will be confusing Good luck!

IMO once you'vemade the break its better not to go back otherwise will be sending him confusing messages and may learn next time if he cries hard enough may get his own way. Think i would stay with him and dad and have extra snuggles without offering the boob and extra cuddles before bathtime etc.

poor wee guy, sounds rough. :( perhaps you could try and make the transition a bit more gradual so its less traumatic for him? BFing is as much about comfort and soothing as it is about hunger and probably that time was helping him calm down, relax and feel safe settling off to sleep. If you wanted to bring back the feed, you could move it further and further away from the time he actually goes into bed (eg you could feed him before the bath) so that he gets used to the gap and loses the association between feeding and falling asleep. You could then make sure you give him an extra special cuddle time before he goes to bed, so he isn't loses the closeness and soothing that he is used to and eventually he won't need the feed as part of the routine. have you tried staying with him (either you or your husband) until he stops crying rather than leaving him alone?