Introducing toddler who doesn't talk yet to new sibling

Sounds like your doc is very much on the same page as mine. Yes I hear you about the breastfeeding, that was my biggest worry too. Unfortunately my daughter had the same latching issues as my son, I'm pretty sure tongue/lip tie has played a part both times, I would reccommend you meet with Dr Dephine if you have any latching/supply issues. Unfortunately I was unable to fly to Dubai as it took forever for my daughters passport to come through and there isn't really anyone in doha who can deal with it but she has helped me via email and seems to have the best knowledge in UAE by all accounts. Are you a member of the facebook group "Breastfeeding Q&A Dubai UAE?" its a great source of breastfeeding advice, experience and support and worth joining.

Yes I had a VBAC in Doha, for the same reason you mention, I had a 2 year old and I knew it would be a total pain if I couldn't lift/cuddle/wrestle with him. I guess my top tip for having a VBAC would be choose the right OBGYN, I think that is crucial because so many are either blatently or secretly not ok with VBAC. Mine actively encouraged me to go for VBAC and was quite clearly pro-natural birth. I think a good way to find out how an OBGYN really feels is to ask them how they had their own children, a lot opt for c-section. That said my Dr did impose quite a few conditions, I had to go into labour spontaneously and she wouldn't let it go for as long as she would if I hadn't previously had a c section. She also preferred I have continuous monitoring although when the time came she was ok with intermittent (I had to sign a release form though) My baby co-operated by deciding to came the day after she was due, I think they would have let me go around a week over and then done a c-section rather than induce if she hadn't showed up) From my side I chose not to have an epidural (as this can slow down labour and because you are locked in one position you can't help the baby move down as well) and I stayed at home as long as possible before going in. I walked around (and even did a supermarket shop) while having contractions and by the time I got to the hospital I was already 7cm and fully effaced. My OBGYN had agreed to oversee the labour even if off duty (because she was pretty sure a lot of the other Drs wouldn't be as supportive of my VBAC) and she was really good at making sure I was allowed freedom of position (In Doha they really like you to labour on your back whereas I wanted to be kneeling!) I gave birth around 3 hours after arriving at the hospital, so it was pretty short and my baby was never in any distress, I do think staying at home and keeping mobile and busy probably made a difference and that not having an epidural made it easier for me to adopt the best positions but mine was not an especially long or painful labour which was lucky I guess. I gave birth a few minutes after midnight and (on my request) was discharged by lunchtime, which was great, I put my son to bed before going to the hospital, my husband was there when he got up in the morning and came and collected me and the baby after putting DS down for his nap. I'd had an easy c section and good recovery but I'd have to say,VBAC recovery was much better, 3 days post birth I was out having coffee etc. Not to imply that giving birth was "easy" because lets face it, its never easy, but I think it was worth having the VBAC (although I may not have been thinking that at the time of pushing LOL). We moved house 3 week later and that would have been a nightmare if I'd had a c section! We actually gave lots of gifts "from the baby", one when I came home from the hospital (a duplo fire truck set, which I had told him the baby was going to get him, so again, he was really prepared for exactly how things were going to be). I also had a box of little treats (books, cheapie toys etc) and every time I could feel him getting a bit jealous/feeling neglected I gave him another "gift". I'm actually finding that now that DD is crawling, climbing etc its much harder than when she was born as DS no longer views her as being so fragile and he's constantly trying to pick her up, carry her around, wrestle etc which is all good until somebody's head hits the tiles.... I did find that he became a real Daddy's boy for around 6 months as he obviously realised that Daddy was giving him his full attention whereas mummy was a bit of a lost cause, but he seems to be getting past that now. Its hard having two but doubly rewarding, enjoy!!

yay! congrats stovetop! great news! but to answer your question - dont sweat it too much, be relaxed and she will pick up on this. i involved N in absolutely everything with new DS and she was thrilled with it all, almost no jealousy issues at all. we did the gift and she still knows what he brought her, nearly 4 months on. one decision we made was not to bring her to the hospital tho - he was born when she was exactly two and i felt if she came she would have left kicking, screaming and upset. so we saved the intro for home and when we walked in DS was left in the arms of DH and I immediately was on the floor hugging and playing with her. i also never was too careful about keeping her away from him or sheltering him from her, even if i felt she was playing a little too clumsily sometimes. again - relax and be calm. she will be too. we read "Im a Big Sister" over and over and over, personalizing it along the way for our family. she still loves reading it today. about permanent member etc - me (and all my friends) were pretty convinced that she was going to lose it when DS arrived bc she would lose it anytime i touched another baby. but, shockingly, she just got it and carrying him etc was never an issue. in fact, when we list who is at home waiting for us when we're out and about she quickly added his name in the days following his arrival. as has been said, they are better at coping than you think.... just give her a chance. enjoy it.... well, in the few moments youre not chasing two of them around. that part is exhausting.

Don't look for problems which may not arise :) Most toddlers adapt well to a new brother or sister with no issues at all. My DD was exactly 3 when my DS was born and when we told her that she was going to be a big sister when I was about 5 months pregnant, she was all excited. We did the whole present for her from her new brother ( a tiny baby doll) and she had a present for him ( a blue teddy) My darling MIL bought her a crying baby doll too ( could have killed her LOL!) When she came to visit after DS was born, I too was not holding him so that I could cuddle her and take her to see her baby brother in his crib. She was besotted from day 1. I just made sure that I involved her at bath and feed times and made time for just her too. Don't worry, it will be fine if you are relaxed and matter of fact about it. I also, as a rule, when visiting a new baby, always take a small gift for the older sibling if they are under, say 7 or 8 years old. Big brothers and sisters can feel left out when relatives and friends make a huge fuss over a new baby. :)

With my son I always find he does better when he understands EXACTLY what is going to happen, so in regards to his sister's arrival, I told him a bedtime story almost every night (on his request) about the day she would arrive, how I would go to the hospital, the Drs would take her out (glossed over that bit :)) and how I would put her in this basket and then in this carseat and Mummy would give her a cuddle when she cried etc etc. He coped really well when the time came. I'm sure your daughters receptive language is much more advanced than her spoken word, so there is no reason why you couldn't do the same. As far as expressing emotions, that's quite abstract and takes a long time anyway, the best you can do is verbalise for her "do you need mummy to cuddle you now, are you feeling worried" etc etc so she eventually learns how to verbalise the same herself.

Try not to worry about it stovetop, whether she is talking a lot, a little or not at all has no bearing on anything. Most children go through a period of adjustment when a new sibling arrives and they'll express themselves however they see fit, they certainly don't need a big vocabulary to do so. My first child (newly potty trained) expressed herself by wetting her pants a lot when the new baby arrived. We put potty training on hold for a bit, she got used to the new dynamic and all was well again. Once they are through the initial adjustment they are often thrilled to have a baby to help with then a new playmate. I did a book for my first child when I was expecting the second. It explained about me going to the hospital, who she would be with, the baby arriving, her visiting, what would happen when we all got home etc. When she came to meet the baby for the first time we had a 0 birthday cake, she gave the baby a present and the baby gave her a present. My husband held the baby when she first came in so my arms were free to give her a big cuddle. Before going to the hospital she also helped me get the nursery ready and we talked a lot about it being the baby's new room. Don't stress, children are normally better at coping with these sorts of things than we give them credit for.