My son doesn't like my friend's kid.

kiwispiers15400

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Latest post on 03 October 2011 - 18:34

Oh dear do hope you're not talking about me, did our kids fight today? My suggestion would be to have an honest talk with your friend, she might have ideas about how to limit fights, know situations where her lo is less aggressive, etc.

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K336709

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Latest post on 29 September 2011 - 21:04

TBH I think the older they get the more "aware" they are, my LO has got more picky whom he wants to play with. Another thing - in his nursery, there is a boy biting him regularly, but this is one of the kids he still chooses to play with... And then thers a much younger girl from friends who hits him but he fully tolerates it, saying he did the same when he was a "baby"... And he likes her a lot... The ways kids find their mates and have a click is not always based on friendly behavior? Does your little one get upset when youre seeing the other child, or is it you who doesnt like the view of aggressivity?

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kiwispiers15400

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Latest post on 29 September 2011 - 20:55

yup ladies-only situations are pretty limited as our kids don't go to nursery and we don't have live-in maids but I might try and organize a weekend one. You ladies have given me an idea, I suspect that as the weather cools down a bit, things might be less intimidating for DS if we go to the park etc, as the other child will probably/hopefully run around instead of jumping on him ;), am hoping that as they get older it won't be as much of a problem, any other tips appreciated.

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K336709

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Latest post on 29 September 2011 - 18:18

I'm going to follow this thread. Have to admit in past I stop seeing the mother of a scary child... There was a real friendship growing, but LO's couldn't get on. Looking back I'm sad because I lost something special... At that time I didn't know what to do, it went out of hand with LO screaming every time I mentioned "we are going to visit xyz"... Maybe go to have one on one with her? Like ladies thingie? Not a long term plan tho. We tried that, it didn't work as the opportunities are so limited if you have young kids and then it just is not a good fix. If I would be you, I'd take it up in a very neutral matter, asking for her opinion -- "I enjoy our contact, do you think our kids do enjoy it too...?" or "Do you think LOs like their time together?" I noticed that the other child was less scary when they visited us. At their place it was outta hand tho.

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Hello.Again.Kitty

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Latest post on 29 September 2011 - 17:28

hmmm... tricky! You could try just managing the situation, so for example, hosting round yours so that you son feels slightly more empowered and reassured... or organising a particular activity so that they are focussed on that rather than each-other... or you could go somewhere where they don't have to be next to each other if they don't want to be, but you can still talk to your friend... or meeting your friend socially when your children aren't around?

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kiwispiers15400

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Latest post on 29 September 2011 - 16:38

In short I have a good friend who I met while pregnant and I'd like to see more of her than I do but our kids just don't seem to click, they're still only toddlers so its not like they're all that social with each other anyway but her child actually frightens mine, and he's not easily frightened. I find myself avoiding playdates which is awful because, as expats its not often you meet someone you really click with. The kids are still quite young and hers is older, I don't want to offend her by raising the issue, any tips?

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