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Visitors to stay ... with a 2 month baby

308

Posts

EW EXPLORER

Latest post on 25 March 2013 - 14:54

Hi Ladies,

My parents are due to visit at Christmas, and at that time I'll have a 2 month old baby. Is this a good idea? My parents haven't been to Dubai before although would be more than happy to go out and about themselves. Just not sure if having an extra two people in the house is going to be a good idea if potentially I'll be up all night with a screaming baby and feeding (that's all I can think of at the moment!). My sister will come out for a week immediately following the birth, but that's one person/extra pair of hands, so think that will definitely be a help.

I appreciate this depends on the baby and how I'm/we're all doing. Just wondering what others have found useful or a hinderance in the past with regards to visitors/family help.

TIA.

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345

Posts

EW EXPLORER

Latest post on 03 June 2013 - 14:18

it kind of depends on the expectations of the visitors and if you feel you want the help - with my first two, I had my mum, then my MIL, back to back for the first three months - but the reason for their visit was to help me, not to have a holiday/ be entertained. When SILs came to visit they totally took care of themselves in terms of cooking (in which case they cooked for me and DH as well : ) ) taking themselves out, organising their own entertainment and helping out with the little ones when they were at home. At the time, we lived in a large house so there was plenty of space for everyone and I didnt feel 'crowded' - i needed my space to breastfeed/ express etc and just escaped upstairs with the baby for hours when i needed to. this time (i'm due in a few weeks), i've made it clear that I dont want any visitors when the baby is born or for the rest of the summer. we live in an apartment and i already have 2 kids, plus live-in maid, so any more people and it starts getting cramped with sleeping arrangements/ bathroom schedules etc. i suspect i will get some after the summer, but at least i'll have 3 months on get myself sorted.

Lil miss sunshine

10

Posts

EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 03 June 2013 - 10:15

Jupiter you def would be better if you had your sis to help. My mum stayed with me for a month after I had the baby, and after that my MIL for another month, and it was such a blessing. Cuz they spent all their time with the baby and handed him over only for the feeds. So I got my much needed rest and sleep, which made all the difference. Cuz at the end a HAPPY MOTHER=HAPPY BABY. So If you had ur sis who wud help, its so worth it.

308

Posts

EW EXPLORER

Latest post on 03 June 2013 - 09:50

Thanks ilovewine. I am tight with my sister and she's THE best guest to have (very low maintenance, cooks and cleans!) but with her OH (also very good and great with kids) it's just an extra two people in the house when everything will be up in the air (I'm guessing). And it's not like babies do much at that age anyway. Like you, I would also be thinking about them being entertained and if they were OK, even though they wouldn't want me to worry about them - how can you not when they're your visitors? Maybe I've just answered the question there myself. Thanks :)

477

Posts

EW EXPLORER

Latest post on 03 June 2013 - 09:07

i wont have visitors (except mum) at 2 months. i remember being exhausted when DS was 2 months old. all i did was feed, clean poop, burped DS, and start all over again. i could honestly not be entertaining guests - no matter how self-sufficient they are. i'd always be wondering in the back of my mind if they're ok, if they feel "left out", if they are enjoying themselves, if if if. not sure how tight you are with your sister, so perhaps it's a different scenario?

308

Posts

EW EXPLORER

Latest post on 02 June 2013 - 16:58

Ladies, similar issue again I'm afraid: We've agreed on the xmas visit, so that's all good, but my sis and partner want to visit before that. Will this disrupt routines too much (not sure if a routine will be established then? I'm guessing we'll both be pretty tired anyway, so maybe this visit is too soon? They are both incredibly helpful, but I can imagine it will still be a stress of sorts given we won't know where are heads are at. Sorry for such a boring (and repeat) subject, but I just can't imagine what it's going to be like ... and still don't even think I'm really going to have a baby!

308

Posts

EW EXPLORER

Latest post on 28 March 2013 - 16:57

Thanks for the feedback ladies. I think when I eventually break the news to them we'll have a frank discussion. They've had four kids themselves, so should know what to expect!

kiwispiers15400

2782

Posts

EW EXPERT

Latest post on 25 March 2013 - 22:11

Depends not just on your baby but also on your parents, are they coming to help or do they expect be looked after? If they are likely to turn up, do a supermarket shop for you and cook dinner then you will enjoy their stay, if you feel like you have to keep the house super clean, cook lovely meals and feel obliged to take them out and about then you will find their visit tough. I find my dad isn't very good at pitching in and gets bored sitting around the house so I pretty much told him not to come so early, I think the 2 month mark is in many ways harder than immediately post birth as you are worn out from 2 months broken sleep and babies are often more unsettled around this point, its a good time to have support and a bad time to have extra people to look after so maybe have a think about your expectations for the visit and figure out what theirs would be?

391

Posts

EW EXPLORER

Latest post on 25 March 2013 - 20:00

we went skiing with the grandparents at 2 months! Even I skied! This was with number 2 - so we also had a 3 year old. My parents came to visit when my first was about a week old. i loved having them there. Me personally, i would have no problems whatsover with my parents visiting when baby was 2 months old.

186

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EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 25 March 2013 - 15:07

for me personally 2 months will be ok for them to come, i had my parents and in laws here when my DS was born and it was too much- next time they will come when baby is 1-2 months old. as you said your parents are happy to go out by themselves, if they were going to be dependant on you then i would suggest them waiting.

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