Advice Please | ExpatWoman.com
 

Advice Please

776
Posts
EW GURU
Latest post on 29 July 2013 - 08:59

I know this might have come up but i'd like to know how do you organise your time, i am a mother of a DD and work from 8-6 PM. My 10 month old DD goes to nursery from 730 to 4. I drop her off and my DH who finishes at 330 picks her up. By the time i reach home i am exhausted. I do try to cook every other day and have left overs when i don't cook. I also try to clean the house when i can. Washing the dishes is a hassle for me as i hate it but i have to do it other wise i will not be able to sleep at night LOL. DH tries to help as much as he can by staying with DD but you all know the patience level of a man hehe.. if i spend 30 mins in the kitchen DH comes to me and says whats taking you so long when i respond its only been 30 mins he then just looks shocked then starts laughing saying that it seemed like 2 hours hehe.. he really appreciates what i do.. but the problem is i have so many things that i would love to do but have no time at all.. i do get help once a week but that really is not enough.. and getting a maid is not an option for me because of all the stories i read here and on the news. and also from past experience when i was single living with my family. the main thing that i would love is to get back to my normal body shape. i still have a lot to lose from my pregnancy.. in the beginning i thought to myself ok i'll lose the weight when i finish BF and when BF was over (Due to problems as i wanted to continue till she weaned herself) i told myself ok when Ramadan is here since i get to finish early i can go after Iftar, that didn't work out so well.. i am desparate in losing the weight, and being confident in myself again. i really hate looking at myself and it really is causing me to get angry very quickly and not go out as much because of how i look. but i honestly can't find the time to do anything other than play with my DD, cook, clean, then lie down like a bum... it's really exhausting.. my precious DD is quite the hyper kind and keeps me on my feet all day during weekends, and when i come back from work..

my plan now is hoepfully when Ramadan is over, i will take my 2 hour break during work and join a GYM, but i don't know how that will turn out.. i just really need advice from the mamas of EW.. guide me to the right path i have 15 Kgs to lose and it's really frustrating.. i can't seem to find the time to take care of myself :'(..

Anonymous (not verified)
0
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 31 July 2013 - 15:55
mrsb. great advice as usual, i think the idea of getting a daily maid is great. esp the prepping dinner.. love it.. i'll definetly do that.. as for weight i think ill do that.. i need to watch what i eat tho.. coming from a culture of rice and bread being a must is really bad. i need to cut down on those.. i heard a friend telling em she kept eating as she usually does but cut out on the rice and bread and lost 2 dress sizes in 2 weeks.. thanks again..xx Instead of eating all from one big tray of meat and rice/roti, as we usually do in our home, I try to place a small amount of rice and meat etc on a bread and butter size plate (side plate) to help me reduce the amount of food I eat. I think a combination of timing and portion sizes would be a great place to start.
776
Posts
EW GURU
Latest post on 31 July 2013 - 10:53
mrsb. great advice as usual, i think the idea of getting a daily maid is great. esp the prepping dinner.. love it.. i'll definetly do that.. as for weight i think ill do that.. i need to watch what i eat tho.. coming from a culture of rice and bread being a must is really bad. i need to cut down on those.. i heard a friend telling em she kept eating as she usually does but cut out on the rice and bread and lost 2 dress sizes in 2 weeks.. thanks again..xx
Anonymous (not verified)
0
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 30 July 2013 - 21:18
Singarosa, firstly, I suggest you organise a day maid to come in daily, clean up from the night before and the morning so that you come home every evening to a clean, tidy and well organised home. Perhaps she cold even do the prep for dinner, ie chopping vegetables etc. alternatively, a slow cooker is a great idea and the meals are delicious!! Weight: I have found the best way I hve lost weight and keep it off is moderate exercise (I walk in the evenings and run up and down my stairs) plus a very strict eating routine rather than a diet. That is, I eat every 5 hours without fail so my body does not think it is not going to be fed. So, if I eat breakfast 6:30 am, I eat again at 11:30 and then again 4:30 and after that, just a small snack early in the evening. I try never eat after 6:00. It was very difficult for me as our culture is a night culture where dinner is eaten very late. I now just sit with my family, but do not eat, or if pressed by my husband, will just pick at a small green salad. I basically eat whatever I want otherwise, everything full fat. However, I never eat fast food or drink soft drinks. I drink a lot of milk, and yoghurt - all full fat and still loose weight. Doing this I dropped 10 KG in a couple of months and have kept it off! <em>edited by mrsb. on 30/07/2013</em>
776
Posts
EW GURU
Latest post on 30 July 2013 - 13:13
Thanks Itaka, will definitely start slowly and work my way through it.. i keep saying it took 9 months to gain this weight + 7 months of BF.. so it will take more than that to be healthy again.. its not more of losing weight but of being healthy, and when i get to know the best food to have and what to avoid and the work outs i need to do each day.. then i'm sure it will turn into a habit, and things will be easier.. ladies thank you so much for your replies..
2
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 30 July 2013 - 11:53
Singarosa, losing weight is long process, so the best thing you can do is to start with small steps, every day. Try to set a big goal, how much you want to lose, and after that divide it on small goals, starting with what you can do today. First at all try to recognize what do you need to change about your eating habits:how many meals you have during the day, what kind of food and beverages better to avoid (Ginnee gave you very good example about sugar drinks), amount of portion, ways of preparing food...Once you recognize what you have to change, start with something that will not influence too much on your every day routine, but be persistent about this. It will be much easier if you set a small goals because it is not difficult to achieve them, and after you success, you'll feel great.It will be the best motivation for the next step. And one by one, after some time you'll see very good progress.
1285
Posts
EW OLDHAND
Latest post on 29 July 2013 - 13:45
Halve the amounts, buy a small can of condensed milk instead of the big one. You have to live life!! I know how you feel about the weight gain. It's depressing. But to put things in perspective you are working and have a young baby and husband to look after. These are the important things in your life. I didn't really start to lose the weight until the girls were about 4. I just found it too exhausting to try to fit exercise in. Be fair to yourself. I'm by no means trying to talk you out of losing weight, but maybe you could just put it in your mind that for now, you are determined not to gain more. Then slowly try to amend your diet. See where you can cut the calories comfortably. Calorie counting is far more important than exercise. Do some research on how much exercise you actually have to do in order to burn just a few hundred calories. It's scary!! Cut out sugar drinks for instance and just have water with lemon wedges or a few drops of orange blossom water. Little things can go a long way
776
Posts
EW GURU
Latest post on 29 July 2013 - 12:43
Ginnee i already own a tefal pressure cooker, best investment ever.. love the way my mutton and chicken come out to be.. very tender and full of taste.. i think thats the reason i get to have dinner on the table otherwise i would be so exhausted by the time i come back from work.. and i think i will tell the maid to come twice a week instead of once... i always wonder how some people keep the house so organised and clean and i wish i can have that but with my 10 month old baby thats impossible.. and the insane working hours we have here.. i can only imagine what will happen to the house once my DD starts walking lool.. hopefully things work out i just need to organise my time.. family comes first ofcourse.. and my DH totally understands and poor thing tries to help out with the trash and stuff hehee.. there is only so much that they can do.. all i want is time to lose the baby weight.. i think ill start on P90X since i can do it in my house.. i just need that motivation to start.. just one day is all i need to get me back on the right track.. if that doesnt work i guess ill join fitness firt.. we'll see how that goes.. *Sigggh* speaking about weight.. Ginne i have yet to try your um ali.. i have all the ingredients from the first day i read your recipe and every day i come so close to making it then i change my mind.. i'm too scared.. i keep eyeing my frozen croissants.. and they keep calling out for me.. i'm too tempted and i love um ali &lt;3... maybe if i just do it this first time and last time.. then i won't ever ever ever think of doing it again... ohhh GINNNNEEEE... Beany, i should take things slowly, i'm no superwoman, and i'm not perfect.. i just hope things get easier and will def. book an appt for those grey hairs.. hehe
1285
Posts
EW OLDHAND
Latest post on 29 July 2013 - 12:11
Singarosa, don't be so hard on yourself. The advice of the other ladies is spot on. Try to get an agency maid more than once a week. I hear that with some companies you can have an arrangement for the same maid to come every time and that if it is a permanent/fixed arrangement you can negotiate for a lower price. I used to have a slow cooker (sold it when we moved to Dubai) and wish I still had it. However I do have a pressure cooker, which I love. You can make the most amazing stews and other dishes in it and it only takes a fraction of the time. A stew of the cheapest toughest meat, which would normally have to boil for hours only takes 40 mins. The other idea is to casserole things slowly in the oven. Turn the oven on in the morning to it's lowest setting, put the casserole (covered) in, and forget about it till night time. Turn the oven up to it's highest heat and take the casserole out, remove some juices into a cup, let them cool a bit (I put it in the fridge - naughty!) then stir in some flour to thicken it. Add the juices back to the casserole and put it back in the oven for 20 mins. Finito and delicious.
141
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 29 July 2013 - 11:43
Mmm, I remember my mum used to cook a lot in the slow cooker and it was so good, the meat becomes really tender even if it's not the best quality cut. She used to make stews with pearl barley and dumplings, best comfort food ever! Expect you can find loads of recipes online these days. In general I think maybe it helps to adjust your expectations a little and don't feel like you have to do everything perfectly...when my sister was first married, she was very houseproud and everything was always immaculate, then the first baby came and standards went down a bit, then baby no. 2 plus dog, cat, chickens and rabbits and the place was a zoo! But everyone was happy and well fed so I'm taking a leaf out of her book. Once the little ones were older it became easier again. Oh, and hair dye for the greys ; - )
776
Posts
EW GURU
Latest post on 29 July 2013 - 11:31
i guess ill invest in a crock pot then, i heard so many things about it, but wasnt sure if i should go for it .. does it come with a recipe book or can i easily find recipes online?? as for the treadmill, thanks for the offer, i just need to make sure i have enough space in 2nd bedroom, and will def get back to you.. xx
2584
Posts
EW EXPERT
Latest post on 29 July 2013 - 11:18
Singarosa I am selling a treadmill if you are interested :) A crock pot is fab! You can make soups, stews, curries etc in it. I have a Kenwood which is a good brand. It's so good, you literally just put things in on your way out of the door, set it for 8 hours and then when you come home it is all ready! It's the way forward!! :)
776
Posts
EW GURU
Latest post on 29 July 2013 - 10:36
I really appreciate your replies, its replies like these that gives me a boost and help me through.. I already get a maid once a week but i think i'll tell them to come 2 times a week that way the house is clean. i sometimes feel bad that they come to a messy house i actually feel embaressed then i tell myself thats why i get them.. it's their job and they do get paid.. i always thought about getting a crock pot.. is it really a good investment, and is the food good?? can you let me know which one is a good one.. Beany thats what i keep telling myself that i am only human and should not beat my self with the house being a wreck, i think i just got used to my family home to be always clean and food is always on the table hehe.. getting married has a lot of responsibilites. We do try to coordinate the sleeping in, but on sat when i do leave her to get some sleep, i can hear her scream and cry so as instinct i just get up take her and go to the play room where she can play. i was thinking of getting a treadmil but heard that in the long term it can cause knee problems, in university the treadmill was my best friend and it caused no problems so i think ill invest in a good one and start on P90X so atleast i can be home. things really need to change, i honestly discovered 10 grey hairs and im still not ready for them :'(
141
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 29 July 2013 - 10:05
Our babies are about the same age, I don't work and I still have a few kg's to lose (plus my house is a wreck most days) so I think you shouldn't beat yourself up! None of us are Superwoman. So I am not the best person to give advice but a few thoughts are: Get a dishwasher if you can! You can get some slim line or small ones if you don't have a lot of space. Either get your DH to help more or get more outside help, like from an agency if you don't want a full time maid. Get a cross trainer, stick it in the living room and force yourself to do 30 mins a night in front of the TV before you collapse for the night. These things are really good especially if your thighs and butt need toning. I am not really a gym person so this is better for me. Can you arrange something with your DH like he sleeps in on Friday morning and you sleep in on Saturday so you get some more rest? I know you say he appreciate what you do but it sounds like he could be sharing the load a bit more, given the long hours you work. If he's no good at housework or cooking at least he could look after the LO while you have a little bit of 'me time' at the weekend, whether that's going for a swim or getting a hair cut or whatever. At least you feel more refreshed and happier with yourself.
2584
Posts
EW EXPERT
Latest post on 29 July 2013 - 09:57
If you can't have live in help, I advise leaving all your washing up and cleaning and getting an agency maid 2 or 3 times a week. There is nothing worse than running around all the time trying to fit everything in, and there is no need when home help is affordable and easy to organise. Let your agency have the key to your house. Leave the house a mess and come home to a calm, clean and tidy one ;) leaving you the time to play with your DD and DH. Also, invest in a slow cooker - chuck everything in on your way out to work and it will be ready when you walk in the door.
776
Posts
EW GURU
Latest post on 29 July 2013 - 09:52
25 Reviews and no response?? am i ever going to get advice her on EW ??