I know it's another long sleep post but I really need help! :(

Well I think you are going to get such a range of advice that hopefully it won't confuse you further but to put my 2 cents in, he is too young to be left to cry. I would try her approach at a minimum of 4 months plus, if you are comfortable with the idea of it, and my personal opinion is that until he is old enough to understand that you are coming back EVER, when you don't come at his cry, then it really is quite traumatic for him to do so, however it might work in stopping the crying at that later stage and it is up to you if you feel it is worth it. I had 4 weeks of DS waking every 90 minutes when we stopped swaddling, it was a little later on, he was 5 months old. My personal feeling was that he had a dummy addiction, combined with 4 month sleep regression, up until that point he had slept through with one night waking, since he was around 8 weeks old. At around the 10 week mark I think his naps became 45 minutes the dot and stayed that way until he was nearly 9 months old. At the end of that awful month I was very close to considering sleep training, but I decided it would be a last resort, and followed the "pantly pull out" technique to wean him off falling asleep with his dummy, it worked really well in reducing his night waking but I still gave him his dummy if he cried in the night and fed him if he still seemed unsettled. He continued to wake 1-2 times a night off and on for most of his first year and finally now mostly sleeps through, for me that was acceptable, which is not to say it wouldn't have been nice for him to have slept better, but it wasn't bad enough that I would leave him crying, maybe you need to consider what your own expectations are? Can I ask if you are following any kind of schedule/routine for his feds and naps?. I know I bang on a about this a bit and for some reason I get the feeling you are not keen on demand feeding? but truthfully at 3 months there is a big change in the way your supply works, combined with your babies level of distractibility and a large proportion of babies become unsettled at the breast at this point, you really might have to consider feeding more often, are you following his weight, have you noticed a drop off (on the breastfed WHO charts of course), this would be a hint you needed to be feeding more frequently whether you want to schedule it or do by demand (and not all babies are "demanding" enough to be fed entirely on cue.) This would not be a sign that you should introduce solids btw, nor would the waking at night, please don't consider it because I know some well meaning person is likely to suggest that. I don't really think being tired is the most likely explanation for not wanting to feed, nor does it sound like reflux if a bottle is happily drunk in nursing position (short naps is def not a reason for reflux meds), are you sure there isn't a preference developing?, if he is unhappy at the breast and then happily takes a bottle then I would say there is a clear preference. As far a sleep schedule, you will have to allow for the short naps by adding more of them, you can try putting him back down either a short time after a nap, or reducing awake time between naps to something like 1 hour and see how that goes. You might want to try and track down the book, Healthy Sleep Habits Happy Child, it has a lot of good info regarding the development of biological sleep rhythms in infants and developing age appropriate naps, without the rigid one size fits all routine that other books advocate. I don't want to bash Cecile, and I have no idea if she has given you feeding advice, but please do your own research before considering strictly scheduling/limiting breastfeeds, I've seen it work and I've seen it fail, more often the latter. Anyway, the point of all this waffle (hard to be concise with a 1 year old banging blocks at my feet), is give it a little time, meanwhile experimenting with awake/nap schedules but not expecting a solid pattern to form at this age (solid circadian rhythms develop around the 4 month mark) and doing your best not to let LO get too worked up or overtired before a nap. Get whatever support you need, even if it means asking family to come and stay and make a plan based on what you consider reasonable and manageable. End of the day, you are the mum, it has to be your decision. And a big hug, because I have been there, and it is confusing, and worrying and hard, but it isn't forever.

thanks Plumie...would love to ask you more details but I know your busy....if you don't want to discuss on here either I'd really appreciate a quick email - caterina underscore strano at yahoo dot com dot au, as to the method you used and whether it did involve any CIO or JUST 20/5/20 thanks! Exactly the same method that you were advised. Hands on 20, pick up 5, hands on another 20 and then if still not settled, do "whatever". We never left the room once! Will be able to chat to you offline in the week as it will give me something to do, instead of staring into MIL's and FIL face the whole day :D

thanks Plumie...can I ask if you had to leave your DD to cry at this age (13.5 weeks) and if it worked? I don't want it to turn into a Cecile thread either, just looking for advice from people who have worked through this, either with Cecile or differently. It took us 2 weeks of following through with the method, by 9 weeks DD was taking all her day naps and going down without any resistance nor waking up multiple times during the night. She only woke once, normally between 3/4am for a feed and back down until 7am.

Sydneygal - we have been through this (albeit not as bad as you :( ) and have been successful with the 20-5-20 method. We have been with Cecile since DD was 7 weeks old and just had our last consulation with her last week and DD is now 8 months, and have never looked backed with regards to "sleep/settling" issues. I don't want this to turn into another "Cecile" thread, so will just leave you with that peace of reassurance if you feel that you [i'>want[/i'> to follow through with her advise. I wish I had more time to chat to you, but am leaving on a trip tomorrow and need to get packing :/: Good luck and hang in there!!! X

hi sydneygal - so sorry to hear you are still experiencing problems : ( i really feel for you as i know exactly what you are going through - dd is 7 weeks and is displaying similar symptoms. why did you rule out reflux? dd has the classic symptoms - including restlessness and short sleeping spells. i visited the paed last Tuesday again out of shear desperation and his advice was to continue on meds (which another doctor had previously advised me to drop) and if there is no improvement by this coming Monday, he said he would admit her for two nights at City for observation so that they can get to the bottom of the issue. Regarding encouraging sleep, there was another discussion here the other day with some tips. The only additional things I would add are trying to introduce a comforter - I stuffed one down my top for a few hours and then gave it to dd who immediately snuggled up to it in the cot - and to check the AC - I was always under the impression that it was better to keep a room at the 24 degree mark and to only use the swaddle but I have noticed that dd sleeps better when she covered with a light blanket too. let me know if you would like the details of the doc at City. take care : )