A Guide to Understanding Peer Pressures Your Child May Face

During this stage, your child is stating their claim to be different, and attempting to draw a line between both who you are, and who they are - and this change won't last only now, but will pave the foundations for their future character, too.

To help and understand them though, know that this isn't necessarily a process of breaking away - but instead a time to embrace change. The piercings, computer games and different clothing trends won't last, but their realisation that they can be different from you and the family will remain.

For your child, whether pre-teen or teenager, being influenced by a peer group is an important stage; but remember, it's also just a phase.

Like all of the other 'omg I'll never get over this' stages of raising your child, it will eventually end and will no doubt become part of your family's 'funny moments in history'.

While there is a huge range of influences depending on your child's age, there are some 'life experiences' people may argue that we all have to go through; from relationships, to quirky clothing styles, staying out late, wanting expensive technology, alternative beliefs, bad habits like smoking, piercings, tattoos and wanting to go out with their friends without adults present.

As a parent, you need to decide which things you can and can't allow your child to partake in, and remain consistent at all times. Whether it's a piercing, or an iPhone or a revealing piece of clothing... There may be some things you're just simply uncomfortable with them doing.

You have to draw a line somewhere, and no matter how much your child pushes to be like their friends, the answer is, and must remain, a firm no.

Of course, that doesn't mean you have to say no to everything. You may actually be comfortable with certain things they'd like to do - like staying out a little later, or having a tablet or smartphone.

But that doesn't mean they should get free reign - if it makes you feel better, you should set limitations. If they wish to stay out past curfew, only extend it by an hour or so, or they must let you know where they are at a certain time every time they're out. If you allow them to have an electronic device, restrict their access with parental controls or cap their usage so they don't rack up long, long bills.

Quite frankly, not everyone has one... And the 'everyone has got one' line will become a familiar mantra with you throughout these years. It's important to remember that this is hardly ever true.

So yes, while one friend might have the brand new iPhone, or another has a new pair of designer shoes - that isn't necessarily everyone.

Remember this at all times: saying no does NOT make you a bad parent. At times you may feel as though it's a constant struggle between you and your child(ren), but it's also important that you listen to, respect and understand their motivations. Talk to them and discuss exactly why they would like to have or do a certain thing, explain your own concerns so they understand your point of view and you'll find it'll be easy to reach a point of agreement that's comfortable with you both.

There are certain parts of your child's life where their input might benefit the situation and prevent tension between you both. For instance - clothes shopping. Perhaps it's a pressure they're facing from their peers to dress or wear certain styles of clothing, so to combat the pressure include them when shopping.

After all, and we're sure many parents will agree, you might find they're more likely to enjoy and wear clothes that they've helped to pick or chosen themselves entirely... Which means, at least you'll get your money's worth out of those skinny jeans or expensive trainers.