tension between local women and expats? | ExpatWoman.com
 

tension between local women and expats?

596
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EW GURU
Latest post on 01 April 2011 - 20:59
But if you grew up in a country with millions and millions of people and not alot of space, your view would be different. This is why some cultures do not give any space to others and stand so close side by side as if on top of you.It is the way of life and survival in their country and not seen as rude. Having said that I do get fed up with certain nationalities who do it and if I can I avoid the situations. What I don't get is that Western people are expected to understand the nuances of other cultures that we consider "rude", which is fine, but why aren't other nationalities "expected" to understand Western cultures/nuances? For example: when in a store and talking to a sales person, another person - and all my experiences have been with two different but similar nationalities - will boldly interrupt my conversation and start talking to the salesperson as if I wasn't there at all. I have to ask them "Am I invisible? Let me finish and then you can ask your question". Now here I'm perceived as being "rude". Now, I get this may be a cultural thing, but why aren't other nationalities expected to "understand" different Western cultures? When standing in a bank or at an ATM, again, the same two nationalities - stand so close you can feel them breathing on the back of your neck. Westerners - from the US at least - have this thing about "space". The space between myself and the length of my arm is my space. I, out of habit, give this space to everyone. If other nationalities were asked to learn my culture, then they would understand that and would keep their distance from me. They would also understand that we wait our turn if we need assistance and a salesperson is busy with another customer.
379
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EW EXPLORER
Latest post on 01 April 2011 - 20:00
What I don't get is that Western people are expected to understand the nuances of other cultures that we consider "rude", which is fine, but why aren't other nationalities "expected" to understand Western cultures/nuances? For example: when in a store and talking to a sales person, another person - and all my experiences have been with two different but similar nationalities - will boldly interrupt my conversation and start talking to the salesperson as if I wasn't there at all. I have to ask them "Am I invisible? Let me finish and then you can ask your question". Now here I'm perceived as being "rude". Now, I get this may be a cultural thing, but why aren't other nationalities expected to "understand" different Western cultures? When standing in a bank or at an ATM, again, the same two nationalities - stand so close you can feel them breathing on the back of your neck. Westerners - from the US at least - have this thing about "space". The space between myself and the length of my arm is my space. I, out of habit, give this space to everyone. If other nationalities were asked to learn my culture, then they would understand that and would keep their distance from me. They would also understand that we wait our turn if we need assistance and a salesperson is busy with another customer.
596
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EW GURU
Latest post on 01 April 2011 - 18:56
Thank you, will be an interesting read. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/White_British Scroll down to the table Jewelsmiddle - this is as of 2007, I believe they've just done a census so new info should be released this year
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EW OLDHAND
Latest post on 01 April 2011 - 18:53
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/White_British Scroll down to the table Jewelsmiddle - this is as of 2007, I believe they've just done a census so new info should be released this year
596
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EW GURU
Latest post on 01 April 2011 - 18:48
U S A is made up of all nationalities since it was discovered. [i'>Imagine walking down the street of your hometown and 99 percent of the people you met were foreigners[/i'> Like half the big cities in the UK !!! lol Or big parts of New York, Miami and San Francisco???
596
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EW GURU
Latest post on 01 April 2011 - 18:46
I was informed this week that in Uk the minority ( non White ) are only 8 % of the population. Has anyone heard of this figure ? [i'>Imagine walking down the street of your hometown and 99 percent of the people you met were foreigners[/i'> Like half the big cities in the UK !!! lol !! HALF the cities in the UK have 99% non-British residents (and I don't mean non-white because, guess what, there are lots of non-white Brits)? I don't think even the Daily Mail goes as far as that claim!
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EW MASTER
Latest post on 01 April 2011 - 18:15
[i'>Imagine walking down the street of your hometown and 99 percent of the people you met were foreigners[/i'> Like half the big cities in the UK !!! lol !! HALF the cities in the UK have 99% non-British residents (and I don't mean non-white because, guess what, there are lots of non-white Brits)? I don't think even the Daily Mail goes as far as that claim! lol - was kind of tongue in cheek but it is a fact that my father is the last white person left in his road and when you walk up the high street you can count the locals on one hand... and yes i am aware that many of the non-whites are by now 3rd generation British, but to an 82 year old white person who is the last one left in his street it's a difficult thing to discuss...
1039
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EW OLDHAND
Latest post on 01 April 2011 - 17:50
[i'>Imagine walking down the street of your hometown and 99 percent of the people you met were foreigners[/i'> Like half the big cities in the UK !!! lol !! HALF the cities in the UK have 99% non-British residents (and I don't mean non-white because, guess what, there are lots of non-white Brits)? I don't think even the Daily Mail goes as far as that claim!
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EW OLDHAND
Latest post on 01 April 2011 - 17:31
[i'>Imagine walking down the street of your hometown and 99 percent of the people you met were foreigners[/i'> Like half the big cities in the UK !!! lol Or big parts of New York, Miami and San Francisco???
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EW MASTER
Latest post on 01 April 2011 - 17:26
[i'>Imagine walking down the street of your hometown and 99 percent of the people you met were foreigners[/i'> Like half the big cities in the UK !!! lol
596
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EW GURU
Latest post on 01 April 2011 - 16:02
Companies takings good idea's for free from the general public Like the HSBC add!! LOL
596
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EW GURU
Latest post on 01 April 2011 - 16:01
I class those who dress inappropriately when in the Middle East very very rude and offensive but others may not think so as they want the freedom to do as they wish where ever they live.
596
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EW GURU
Latest post on 01 April 2011 - 15:57
But if you grew up in a country with millions and millions of people and not alot of space, your view would be different. This is why some cultures do not give any space to others and stand so close side by side as if on top of you.It is the way of life and survival in their country and not seen as rude. Having said that I do get fed up with certain nationalities who do it and if I can I avoid the situations. I would class pushing and shoving people out the way would be classed as rude regardless where I lived.
1184
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EW OLDHAND
Latest post on 01 April 2011 - 15:03
hmmm... i only experienced others taking my parking spot /taxi / pushing me aside where the others were either local looking or russian looking. but only a few times. not a general phenomena. all in all, i find dubai quite an open minded, tensionless, culturally understanding environment. forget the little frustrations of having 1 person rudely pushing you a day, and appreciate the fact that there are 1000 that day who were not rude!
876
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EW GURU
Latest post on 01 April 2011 - 13:07
What is rude in one country is not always the same in another. hence we need to mix with many cultures to broaden our knowledge. I have found some people can be quite rude. We are not all the same. Some may think they are better than others. But we all know they arent!!!!!!!!!!!! yeh but then those who believe that if you sleep with dogs.... will not want to mix.
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EW EXPERT
Latest post on 01 April 2011 - 13:05
I would class pushing and shoving people out the way would be classed as rude regardless where I lived.
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EW EXPERT
Latest post on 01 April 2011 - 12:55
Like the HSBC add!! LOL
596
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EW GURU
Latest post on 01 April 2011 - 12:49
What is rude in one country is not always the same in another. hence we need to mix with many cultures to broaden our knowledge. I have found some people can be quite rude. We are not all the same. Some may think they are better than others. But we all know they arent!!!!!!!!!!!!
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EW EXPERT
Latest post on 01 April 2011 - 12:44
In the Arab culture you always show respect towards your elders or well connected, you learn a different way, it just is how it is. Most expats in Dubai havn't got a clue about Arab culture or how to behave when in company different to their own.
2725
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EW EXPERT
Latest post on 01 April 2011 - 12:38
I have found some people can be quite rude. We are not all the same. Some may think they are better than others. But we all know they arent!!!!!!!!!!!!
596
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EW GURU
Latest post on 01 April 2011 - 12:30
Yes I think there is, people say especially very long timers , there are different rules and expats do seem to get it alot tougher and locals get off with things they do which are seen as unfair /wrong or illegal Hi Is there some kind of tension between the expats and locals or resentment there?
4329
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EW MASTER
Latest post on 01 April 2011 - 12:25
I generally give locals respect. I let them ahead of me at a door, at the bank etc. I get the odd snooty woman that will not acknowledge me or will give me a distasteful look, but most smile and often will motion me ahead of them. The way I look at it is , it is their country and they are overrun by foreigners. Yes the gov't brought this on themselves, in the name of growth, but I suspect not everyone wanted it. Imagine walking down the street of your hometown and 99 percent of the people you met were foreigners, not planning on staying, but there for a short time. Don't know where you are from but there are many places now where there are masses of "non locals" and "locals" do not expect the "immigrants" to hold doors open for them. Can't believe this actually! :\: Can you imagine if in the UK we told the "whatever nationality" - well you can come to this country but you must hold the door open for anyone British when they are going into a shop. :-P Barking mad!
2262
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EW EXPERT
Latest post on 01 April 2011 - 09:54
Russia is in both Europe and Asia hence, Eurasia.
3804
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EW MASTER
Latest post on 01 April 2011 - 09:54
I generally give locals respect. I let them ahead of me at a door, at the bank etc. Oh dear! And then you wonder why some have a false sense of superiority over others! That's not giving respect, that's allowing yourself to be treated as a doormat. <em>edited by Chocs01 on 01/04/2011</em>
876
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EW GURU
Latest post on 01 April 2011 - 09:51
Russia is Eastern Europe, but not IMHO really Europe. I am quite good at telling the difference between nationalities. Russians, they usually have a difference in their eyes.
173
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EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 01 April 2011 - 09:18
I generally give locals respect. I let them ahead of me at a door, at the bank etc. I get the odd snooty woman that will not acknowledge me or will give me a distasteful look, but most smile and often will motion me ahead of them. The way I look at it is , it is their country and they are overrun by foreigners. Yes the gov't brought this on themselves, in the name of growth, but I suspect not everyone wanted it. Imagine walking down the street of your hometown and 99 percent of the people you met were foreigners, not planning on staying, but there for a short time. Instead of being able to drive a few minutes to see your friend, you get stuck in endless hours of traffic. Yes there are plenty that hate us, so why not make an effort to correct it? If they are snooty, or cut me off etc, I don't take it personally anymore. Life is too short to get stressed by rude behavior in this place. Unfortunately you will see it every single day in Dubai, from every nationality. It can eat you up. Having said that all, if I am PMS'ing,,,, well that is a different story!
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EW EXPLORER
Latest post on 01 April 2011 - 08:39
Dxb Fairy your comment strikes me as an arrogant condescending generalization - I am an expat and I do not feel I am better than everyone. Where I come from we are taught to treat everyone with respect, regardless of color, religion, cultural beliefs, or economic status. And one thing I've learned over the years is that I seem to attract and befriend people with similar beliefs and character. Like attracts like as they say.
328
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EW EXPLORER
Latest post on 31 March 2011 - 23:36
Ive been here 8yrs, and sad to say that living in Dubai (mostly when working full time as well), drives us to stress and anger. My father suggested that suppressing all the behaviours and restraining ourselves to ensure noone is insulted or you dont get arrested yourself ; ) ... this leads to this internal anger. I can see something in that. However, having lived her that long Ive seen every woman from every country regardless of what she is wearing, lose it at another woman ... and not just on a few occassions. This mixed culture can work both positively and negatively, the best thing to do is not react, I usually say out loud "You must be more important or you must be in more of a hurry than me, or you have children so yes you can can jump the q ....etc". It makes me feel better, but once Ive said it, it actually is what I mean. I look after me as Im single, and therefore what do I need to rush or stress about LOL. However, dont get me started on bad taxi service .... I dont mind 95% of the taxi drivers .....deep breaths everyone. The other option is go home!
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EW EXPERT
Latest post on 31 March 2011 - 23:28
I was at Dubai Mall tonight and lots of the local girls (and boys) had stalls set up for their young entrepreneurs projects. It was really nice to see them out in force chatting with expats and promoting their projects with such enthusiasm. Good communication and good manners were in evidence on both sides so it is not all bad.
119
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EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 31 March 2011 - 23:21
afraid you'll find that expats think they are better than everyone. Unfortunetly, probably because they come here, have a different life (better) to what they live back home and it changes them. I've chosen to cut off many people I've met here just because the way they insult muslim, indians, black whatever makes me cringe and how much can I as one person defend all the other cultures.
 
 

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