Does anyone have 2 or more live-in maids??? | Page 3 | ExpatWoman.com
 

Does anyone have 2 or more live-in maids???

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EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 23 January 2011 - 00:14
For those who criticize people who have maids "because my mother did it all by herself" -- there is NOTHING wrong with wanting help and getting it. Not everyone with maids are lazy and raising bratty children.
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EW EXPLORER
Latest post on 22 January 2011 - 23:36
@ AnonDubai, what makes you say that? They just make such a mess in the house and don't pick up anything. I have to pick up once they go to sleep. Then they are always talking about what they want and demand junk food from me...There's no hope! :( When they are a little older you can start a star chart, and encourage them to earn themselves stars. Perhaps you could do a basic one now. Get 3 stars and they will get the tv on......another 3 stars and they can have a trip out.......give them a star for every toy box they fill, or for picking up towels. ETA and then they will be teenagers and we get to collect stars....the tables turn.lol <em>edited by Servants Quarters on 22/01/2011</em>
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EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 22 January 2011 - 23:30
@ AnonDubai, what makes you say that? They just make such a mess in the house and don't pick up anything. I have to pick up once they go to sleep. Then they are always talking about what they want and demand junk food from me...There's no hope! :( LOL... oh dear aAnonDubai ...our kids should meet or not -i should hope.. very familiar ...
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EW EXPERT
Latest post on 22 January 2011 - 23:10
I don't doubt that it did, and certainly with the high blood pressure and quite possibly the arthritis. No respite from constant work and stress isn't good for anyone.
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EW EXPLORER
Latest post on 22 January 2011 - 23:06
Yeah, not saying that having 7 kids gave my mum all these problems, I just think that the stress from doing absolutely everything herself with no time to herself to recuperate had an impact on her general well-being. Edited to add: I'm sure the dinner parties mum and dad would throw all the time with 30+ guests didn't help matters either! (As you can imagine, no caterers!) <em>edited by desertprincess on 22/01/2011</em>
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EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 22 January 2011 - 23:01
I'm not a medical expert but having 7 kids doesn't bring on diabetes but a possible complication of diabetes is one of raised blood pressure <em>edited by TashaB on 22/01/2011</em>
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EW EXPLORER
Latest post on 22 January 2011 - 22:49
@JJ - that's true, but I'm sure the constant stress she was under didn't help the situation!
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EW EXPLORER
Latest post on 22 January 2011 - 22:46
I'm one of 7 siblings. The eldest is now 31, the youngest is 13. My mum has just turned 50. We were all born in London.... mum became a housewife after the 1st kid was born and did it all herself. No maids, no babysitters, no childminders, no cleaners, no gardeners, no daycare... we lived in a 5 bedroom house with 3 reception rooms spread out across more than 3 floors, 3 bathrooms, front and back garden. My Mum didn't even drive so would walk to the shops to do the daily shopping and dad would have to take her for the weekly shop. My parents disliked us watching TV so growing up, we never had one to plonk in front of and give her time to chill out! Quite simply, I don't know how she did it. It is obviously possible but so not worth it. She now has high blood pressure, diabetes and arthritis. She did it because that is what everyone did/does in certain areas of ther world. Remember that the UAE has one of the highest diabetes and obesity rates in the world, i don't think you can attribute your mums condition to the way she brought up her children.
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EW EXPLORER
Latest post on 22 January 2011 - 22:43
I'm one of 7 siblings. The eldest is now 31, the youngest is 13. My mum has just turned 50. We were all born in London.... mum became a housewife after the 1st kid was born and did it all herself. No maids, no babysitters, no childminders, no cleaners, no gardeners, no daycare... we lived in a 5 bedroom house with 3 reception rooms spread out across more than 3 floors, 3 bathrooms, front and back garden. My Mum didn't even drive so would walk to the shops to do the daily shopping and dad would have to take her for the weekly shop. My parents disliked us watching TV so growing up, we never had one to plonk in front of and give her time to chill out! Quite simply, I don't know how she did it. It is obviously possible but so not worth it. She now has high blood pressure, diabetes and arthritis.
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EW EXPLORER
Latest post on 22 January 2011 - 22:30
Expats seem to breed like rabbits with a bit of Sun.
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EW MASTER
Latest post on 22 January 2011 - 22:28
Reading this, I was wondering whether the availability of cheap domestic help had had an impact on expat family sizes - would people have had fewer children, and/or spaced them differently if they hadn't been living somewhere where employing domestic help was common and inexpensive...? Very interesting point - I was only remarking to myself today on the number of pregnant women and large young familes to be observed wherever you go in Dubai - and not just the "locals", but ex-pats too. I just thought, cor there must be something in the water here, I wish I'd been that fertile, wonder if any of them have had fertility treatment.
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EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 22 January 2011 - 22:22
Maids should be banned for all! I never had a maid or will, I have worked full time and part time, had 2 kids and managed to do all without extra help. I do not understand why people complain all the time, I think they should learn how to manage their time better. Now, I don't work and I could not imagine having someone around the house and myself doing nothing! It feels too colonial...I live in the 21st century! Well that would be great for all the girls from Filippines, Sri Lanka and other countries who would have otherwise no jobs. If you do not want a maid, don't, but what an earth is wrong if someone else does. Let people have 1, 2 or 3 maids if they so wish - that is their life.
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EW EXPLORER
Latest post on 22 January 2011 - 22:18
So how do you spend your days? Not judging but would like to know. My mom took us to the local pool 2x a week, played cards/bridge once a week - in the summer, we went to the beach 2 or 3x per week in winter, my dad (and sometimes my mom if my dad wasn't giving her a break) took us fishing, swimming, skating, tobogganing or just for a Sunday drive or a walk in the woods. BTW my dad travelled at least a week out of every month - again, not judging, but what do you do with your free time? After the morning school run I go to the gym, get my nails done, food shopping etc. Grab some lunch. Pick younger kids up by 1pm - they have their afternoon naps I chill out for a couple of hrs...facebook, watching t.v, EW etc. 3pm school run pick up then straight into dropping kids to any activities they might have. I don't get back home until 5pm. Day done! *stunned*
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EW EXPLORER
Latest post on 22 January 2011 - 22:17
Reading this, I was wondering whether the availability of cheap domestic help had had an impact on expat family sizes - would people have had fewer children, and/or spaced them differently if they hadn't been living somewhere where employing domestic help was common and inexpensive...? If I didn't have the ability to have help, I would have stopped at one. No maid = contraception - interesting theory. Mine is no maid = sanity and peace.
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EW EXPLORER
Latest post on 22 January 2011 - 22:15
I wish I had two maids. I have the one who looks after DD1 whilst I look after DD2. DD2 was born 2 months prematurely and is her care is proving to be quite difficult for me. If I could afford one and had the space for another, I would hire another one in a heart beat to help me in the evenings. The way I see it, I don't get a medal for doing it all by myself and I would rather spend my time doing the things I enjoy with my children. <em>edited by lemondrops on 22/01/2011</em>
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EW OLDHAND
Latest post on 22 January 2011 - 21:30
Reading this, I was wondering whether the availability of cheap domestic help had had an impact on expat family sizes - would people have had fewer children, and/or spaced them differently if they hadn't been living somewhere where employing domestic help was common and inexpensive...? If I didn't have the ability to have help, I would have stopped at one.
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EW MASTER
Latest post on 22 January 2011 - 21:15
@ AnonDubai, what makes you say that? They just make such a mess in the house and don't pick up anything. I have to pick up once they go to sleep. Then they are always talking about what they want and demand junk food from me...There's no hope! :(
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EW MASTER
Latest post on 22 January 2011 - 21:10
@ AnonDubai, what makes you say that?
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EW MASTER
Latest post on 22 January 2011 - 20:51
I have 2 nannies & 1 house maid - all live in. I have 2 maids room so 1 has a room all to herself & i have bunk beds in the other room. Good Lord how many children do you have? I have 3 kids. I dont work but I do spend most of day being taxi driver to the kids. School runs & after school activities, playdates etc. I can't do it all myself so I have the extra nannies to help therefore all my kids get to do what they want. Plus it is affordable here so why not? Just a question, not a judgement, but do you ever wonder if your kids are going to turn out obnoxious expat spoilt brats? How do you counter act that happening? My kids will turn into brats for sure.
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EW EXPERT
Latest post on 22 January 2011 - 20:49
And good for you! If you have the time and opportunity and help - more power to you ... but I don't think that those you don't have one or more available (on a consistent basis) or choose not to have the third (for whatever reason), should feel badly - but to be aware of the possibilities (and my dad was the notable exception in our neighbourhood - he would pack every kid in the neighbourhood into the car not just us - and he was probably the only one handed diaperer in the neighbourhood - let alone knowing what the diaper bucket was for. Maybe it's a generational thing as well as a geographical one - I'm glad you all have good trustworthy help - I'm glad my parents were able to "cope" with all of us (with a large societal help network) - hopefully we'll all turn out to be well adjusted self sufficient people.
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EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 22 January 2011 - 20:47
Maids should be banned for all! I never had a maid or will, I have worked full time and part time, had 2 kids and managed to do all without extra help. I do not understand why people complain all the time, I think they should learn how to manage their time better. Now, I don't work and I could not imagine having someone around the house and myself doing nothing! It feels too colonial...I live in the 21st century!
Anonymous (not verified)
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EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 22 January 2011 - 20:42
So how do you spend your days? Not judging but would like to know. My mom took us to the local pool 2x a week, played cards/bridge once a week - in the summer, we went to the beach 2 or 3x per week in winter, my dad (and sometimes my mom if my dad wasn't giving her a break) took us fishing, swimming, skating, tobogganing or just for a Sunday drive or a walk in the woods. BTW my dad travelled at least a week out of every month - again, not judging, but what do you do with your free time? After the morning school run I go to the gym, get my nails done, food shopping etc. Grab some lunch. Pick younger kids up by 1pm - they have their afternoon naps I chill out for a couple of hrs...facebook, watching t.v, EW etc. 3pm school run pick up then straight into dropping kids to any activities they might have. I don't get back home until 5pm. Day done!
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EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 22 January 2011 - 20:42
Reading this, I was wondering whether the availability of cheap domestic help had had an impact on expat family sizes - would people have had fewer children, and/or spaced them differently if they hadn't been living somewhere where employing domestic help was common and inexpensive...?
Anonymous (not verified)
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EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 22 January 2011 - 20:41
nurse my 3 month old twins you deserve a medal just for this!
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EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 22 January 2011 - 20:35
I don't have two maids, just the one! But on days where dh and I are both out of the house I get a lady in who I have known for eight years to help out with the kids. It gives me peace of mind to know tha that the kids are being well looked after, if one is having a nap the other can go to the park... Plus the two helpers are friends and they can keep each other company and be happy rather than feel it is a chore... It makes it a lot easier to walk out of the house that is for sure.. <em>edited by ceese on 22/01/2011</em>
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EW GURU
Latest post on 22 January 2011 - 20:29
When my cousin lived in Jakarta, she had three servants, two maids and a driver, as well as a gardener who came with the compound. That was very much the norm for an expat family, it was a way of supporting the local economy, and one does need a driver in a place like Jakarta. But I wonder if there is an expatwoman forum for Indonesia where people post threads wondering about the families that hire six servants.... Each to its own. Our one maid is perfect for us but if we were in Jakarta I wouldn't hesitate to have more. The tasks would become more specialized, one for the cleaning, one for the cooking, and perhaps even a third as a nanny. It does make life easier...sort of. Managing a staff is probably a full time job in itself!
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EW MASTER
Latest post on 22 January 2011 - 20:20
Asking why and being nosy is not being judgemental. didn't say it was but imo comments like "you can't be bothered to look after your own kids" is... The comment was actually 'maybe people can't be bothered' with a question mark at the end, a rhetorical question. That's not being judgemental, it's merely a suggestion. You actually misquoted the original quote and made up your own judgement Sue 62. I apologise, i should have bothered to go back and read it.
Anonymous (not verified)
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EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 22 January 2011 - 20:19
Asking why and being nosy is not being judgemental. didn't say it was but imo comments like "you can't be bothered to look after your own kids" is... The comment was actually 'maybe people can't be bothered' with a question mark at the end, a rhetorical question. That's not being judgemental, it's merely a suggestion. You actually misquoted the original quote and made up your own judgement Sue 62.
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EW MASTER
Latest post on 22 January 2011 - 20:18
Free time? I get up usually around 5 or 6 and nurse my 3 month old twins (which takes longer than you might think). Then I drop my son (6) off at school in the morning. I come back and play with my daughter (nearly 2) for an hour or so. Feed my twins again. Feed my daughter. Then, I put my daughter down for a nap and usually go to the grocery store or shopping for whatever things we need or, if I'm lucky, spend time with the twins. When my daughter wakes up, we have about 30 minutes usually before we need to go pick up my son. So we play. And then, we pick up my son and take him to an activity, or sometimes he has a playdate. Then I feed the twins, make dinner and get everyone bathed and in jammies and off to bed. Then, I hop on EW and see who has started a fight :) :\: *hands guinness a medal* Bl**dy ****, you must be exhausted come bedtime!
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EW EXPERT
Latest post on 22 January 2011 - 20:17
And I should add - it IS different here - you can't throw kids outside in 50C+ temps the same as you can kids in -10 to - 20 C (you can always put more clothes on them - however, toilet issues raise their ugly heads at that point). It is also more difficult here as the "choices" available as to housing etc. is different than it is at home nor do we have the same societal support systems (whether that be extended family or friends) that we may have at home. Edit starts here Thanks for the breakdown G. I would not have to live that every day, especially without help. As I said above, it IS differet here and if it can be done one should take advantage of the opportunities here - but I don't think people should say it would be miserable otherwise - I know I didn't feel that way growing up and while I also know my parents weren't always happy happy - they enjoyed most of their time with their children (and I'm sure also wished someone else was available to do the "dirty" work) - I know I wish I had a cat box cleaner on a daily basis LOL <em>edited by marycatherine on 22/01/2011</em>
 
 

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