The 18 Most Cunning Lies Parents Tell Their Children |

The 18 Most Cunning Lies Parents Tell Their Children

We asked our team to share the biggest fibs that they believed when their parents told them while growing up...

Posted on

9 February 2017

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Lies Parents Tell Their Children

When it comes to parenting, there's no strict rulebook. Parents so often have to wing it as they go along, and sometimes little white lies may be leaked in order to make their lives a little easier... Who can blame them really? When you have a child so desperate to go to the local swimming pool, there's no harm in telling them it's closed because someone did a number two in it. Every time. Right?

So we asked our resident EWers to share the most creative, cunning lies that they've been told - and tell their own children - in their lives, and the answers are rather a little funny... And more fool us for believing them!

You have to fess up if you have told/been told any of these fibs, too! Comment below!

1. This guy's still 5"3 

"My parents told me that I would have to jump 10 times every New Year's Eve to increase my height"

Parent lies to children 1

2. Here's one way to stop them biting their nails

"If you bite your nails, a tree would grow in your stomach"

Parent lies to children 2

3. One way to save money

"When the ice cream van played its music, it meant they'd run out of ice cream"

Parent lies to children 3

4. Are we 100% sure this isn't true?

"If you eat too much sugar, you'll get worms"

Parent lies to children 4

5. Why you should sit down while eating

"If you eat while you're standing up, the food will go down to your legs and they would become enormous"

Parent lies to children 5

6. If ever you pulled a face at your parents, this was the response

"If you pulled an ugly face, the wind would blow and make it stick"

Parent lies to children 6

7. This is why the Allies won

"My Dad told me that during World War II, my Grandma showed him to the Germans. And because he was a really big baby, it frightened them off... That's why the war ended, right?"

Parent lies to children 7

8. The panic you felt when you did swallow a piece

"If you swallow chewing gum, it'll make your insides stick together"

Parent lies to children 8

9. This is gross, parents

"If you touched the end of a dandelion, it would make you wet the bed" 

Parent lies to children 9

10. We can feel the embarassment

"I believed fairies were real until I was 12 years old thanks to my mother. Until we had a debate in school about it, and I obviously lost"

Parent lies to children 10

11. Everybody knows about the carrots

"I think we all know the propaganda campaign used by parents popularised by the myth that eating carrots is good for your vision" 

Parent lies to children 11

12. What if you don't want curls!

"If you eat your crumbs, your hair will go all nice and curly" 

Parent lies to children 12

13. Poor vegetables, they just want friends

"My mum told me to eat all of the vegetables on my plate, because they would have a party in my stomach, and the vegetables left on the plate would be left all alone and sad"

Parent lies to children 13

14. It's not an unreasonable fib?

"I told my daughter that Extreme Fun was closed the other day to be cleaned... Mummy just couldn't be bothered going" 

Parent lies to children 14

15. We can't stop LOLing

"My mum told our brother that he had to have his underpants measured... The same way girls have to have their bras measured when they're old enough. He was terrified to go to Marks & Spencer"

Parent lies to children 15

16. Someone didn't listen in PSHE classes

"Babies come out of belly buttons?"

Parent lies to children 16

17. Poor baby

"I was terrified of having needles... They told me it would never hurt. Of course it hurt every time" 

Parent lies to children 17

18. This is why we go to the salon

"My nan once told me that if you clip your nails at night and accidentally left clippins on the floor, they would attract monsters"

Parent lies to children 18