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How long does it take for you to come back with a comeback? And then for it to stop bothering you?

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1236

Posts

EW OLDHAND

Latest post on 02 April 2011 - 13:23

Next time I would ask him, "do you find it easy to be so obnoxious or does it come naturally"? This sounds like typical male insecurity. He may have material things but does he have true happiness etc? A mutual "friend" made a complete fool of herself at at party my sister and brother in law had last weekend. She took over the organising of the food, shouted orders at my BIL, yelled over people's heads, interrupted constantly and shouted abuse my 16 year old nephew. It was a house ceilidh and people were playing instruments which she, as a non musician, tried to control too!! The result was a strong email from my sister telling her how dreadful she had been (she wasn't that drunk) and will not be invited to any future parties. Family or not, you don't have to put up with your obnoxious cousin. We have family members that we only see at funerals etc as we can't stand them. be true to yourself and toughen up with this horrible little man. There is no law that states that you have to maintain contact with people just because you are related.

Sugarbeach23383

1566

Posts

EW EXPERT

Latest post on 02 April 2011 - 12:28

RT, could you say to him something along the lines of...yes, yes...your villa is sooo much better than here isn't it blah blah blah...smile, roll eyes and exchange looks with other family members who are on your side. ETA - similar to ashesf's approach. Even I'm seething on your behalf BTW. <em>edited by Sugarbeach on 02/04/2011</em>

266

Posts

EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 02 April 2011 - 12:21

or, you could go the opposite way and start first. tell him what a grand place he lives in, omg, it's the best place in the world and how could everyone not want to live there. geez, you're dying to get out of your place and shift right next to him. maybe in his house while you're house hunting. exaggerate beyond belief. i once had a similar problem with an in-law who just wouldn't shut up. a friend recommended i do this and i've never been bothered since ;)

596

Posts

EW GURU

Latest post on 02 April 2011 - 12:14

he is just horrible, ignore and don't invite him over again if possible. This is a cousin. Its a he, not she. He is one of the most rude and arrogant people I know, but since we're related I cant even get rid of him. I'd buy the jealousy/envy angle, except he lives in a villa in a nice area here, while I have a pretty nice apartment but [i'>apparently [/i'>the location is awful. Isnt he just horrible? I mean, if I had a nice car or whatever, I'd never put down somone else whose car wasnt as nice as mine. This is worse than being jealous. I was steaming about it, but have just resigned to letting it go, as I have on SO many other occaisions. Family members and their sniping comments are far worse than anything my friends could or would come up with, which they dont. I just can never understand people like this.... mind-boggling. Just wish I could think of something nasty to say IN THE MOMENT and feel better. But I like janesul's stock response and am storing it for the future.

596

Posts

EW GURU

Latest post on 02 April 2011 - 12:13

It was her cousin I must be lucky with my friends. If I were you I'd be looking for some new ones.

71

Posts

EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 02 April 2011 - 11:46

I must be lucky with my friends. If I were you I'd be looking for some new ones.

829

Posts

EW GURU

Latest post on 02 April 2011 - 10:40

I would just say as a stock reply, whatever the subject matter, to anything that was rude"Gosh, that sounded really rude! Did you mean to be rude? Are you sure you really meant to be THAT rude?" Watch them backpedal like you wouldn't believe.... I wouldn't use this for unintentional rudeness by the way, just those really snarky things that some people have mastered as an artform ;)

1029

Posts

EW OLDHAND

Latest post on 02 April 2011 - 08:03

Better not to bite back anyway. I know exactly how you feel and what you are talking about, but it is a good think that your "comeback" does not come to you until your rude guest has left! She must be jelous of you anyway :cool:

596

Posts

EW GURU

Latest post on 02 April 2011 - 04:48

It may be envy because they are not able to do what you have done, afraid to do what you have done. Think Der reply is excellent and wish I had been equipped with replies with comments living in tax free countries etc etc but they never wanted to see the challenges it brought living in 3rd world countries . Stepping back and them watching the upset and confusion , well I am sure you do not want to be like that. Not at all nice, Nasty and someone who is possibily bitter.

210

Posts

EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 02 April 2011 - 01:44

Ah, been through this, too, with various friends and family. The only thing I could think of to say, when they left, was that I was sorry that as they obviously didn't like my choice of place to live I was sorry that they wouldn't want to visit again. You wouldn't believe how they back-tracked on all their negative comments. Despite some pretty heavy hints on email ('oh we had such a lovely visit last time') some are still waiting for invitations from us to visit again. **** may freeze over first.

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