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Do I need counseling?

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spongemonkey980

4329

Posts

EW MASTER

Latest post on 17 October 2011 - 16:28

No, you do not need counselling! This is perfectly normal - there are LOADS of women out there / here who think about their first or a special love they had years ago! They THINK about it from time and time and wonder IF.... you are comparing what it was like THEN but it would not be like that now. What you are feeling is [b'>sentiment for the relationship that you HAD[/b'>( which never stood the test of time) not the person per se ............Time has passed, life has moved on. See it for what it was. If it was a great love story, you would still be together.

223

Posts

EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 17 October 2011 - 15:44

Totally agree with pollydxb... there is no harm to seek for this type of help.

1280

Posts

EW OLDHAND

Latest post on 17 October 2011 - 14:10

Question, if you haven't kept in touch, how do you know he is now engaged? If you are "friends " on facebook and any other social network sites and feel as strongly as you do, simply because you have never given yourself a chance to get over him, remove/delete all contact. Forget about him and move on. This happened to me a few months back, the boy I had my longest relationship with, got married in the early summer, I was upset, of course, that is natural. I can see though he is happy, she makes him happy. You need to help yourself, and if that doesn't help, go and see someone, there is no harm in that :)

GattaMatta46817

348

Posts

EW EXPLORER

Latest post on 17 October 2011 - 13:53

The fact itself that you feel like asking, makes me think that maybe you might try and see one. Worst (or best) that can happen, is that you go back home understanding there is nothing wrong with you and that you are perfectly ready to let go, or whatever. Good luck.

AdviceSeeker13702

1100

Posts

EW OLDHAND

Latest post on 17 October 2011 - 13:52

PGTips pls dont be so harsh on yourself. I think how u r feeling is perfectly natural as I have loads of friends who felt exactly how u have described your situation. Does this man know how strongly u feel for him? Maybe u ought to let him know just in case he changes his mind. Its worth a try. All the best. NNOOOOOO! That's a bonkers idea. He is engaged to somebody else. She's not spoken to him for years? Why would she be wanting to do this? It's not an episode of Friends you know, it's real life. Sorry, but I have to agree with that. if you go and try and talk to him after all these years you'll just end up getting more hurt. I think you need to work on letting go. I don't think its abnormal to feel strongly about it but really and truly think about what kind of damage you'd cause not only to yourself but to the girl he's engaged to and to him and your mutual friends by trying something like that.

829

Posts

EW GURU

Latest post on 17 October 2011 - 13:47

PGTips pls dont be so harsh on yourself. I think how u r feeling is perfectly natural as I have loads of friends who felt exactly how u have described your situation. Does this man know how strongly u feel for him? Maybe u ought to let him know just in case he changes his mind. Its worth a try. All the best. NNOOOOOO! That's a bonkers idea. He is engaged to somebody else. She's not spoken to him for years? Why would she be wanting to do this? It's not an episode of Friends you know, it's real life.

704

Posts

EW GURU

Latest post on 17 October 2011 - 13:39

PGTips pls dont be so harsh on yourself. I think how u r feeling is perfectly natural as I have loads of friends who felt exactly how u have described your situation. Does this man know how strongly u feel for him? Maybe u ought to let him know just in case he changes his mind. Its worth a try. All the best.

498

Posts

EW EXPLORER

Latest post on 17 October 2011 - 12:04

You know, are you feeling sad because you are not with him, or are you feeling sad because you don't have what he has? Try and identify your emotions to see whether you are still in love with him, or in love with the idea of having a partner and getting married and the fact that he, of all people, has this?

60

Posts

EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 17 October 2011 - 11:07

I think is not normal feeling like this after such long time. Maybe you are comparing too much your life now with what it could be if... (?) Take some time to think about the real reason why you have this feeling and try to see the situation from another perspective. Good Luck ;)

169

Posts

EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 17 October 2011 - 10:34

Have you found anybody since it ended, sometimes the best cure for a broken heart is to fall in love again. My ex whom is from a large group of friends is getting married and everybody but me will be there but I am married myself and am really happy he has also found happiness. AdviceSeeker is right it depends how upset you are maybe a good cry with a friend and a cup of tea/glass of wine would help? x E.T.A I am Irish and a cup of tea has solved most problems in my family for years!:-) <em>edited by Pricey on 17/10/2011</em>

AdviceSeeker13702

1100

Posts

EW OLDHAND

Latest post on 17 October 2011 - 10:21

Hi, I think its normal to be upset, but it depends on how upset you are. You have to evaluate that and see. I think 10 years is a long time and maybe you need to think about exactly why you're upset. Like, is it because you are jealous, or because you feel you missed out? I don't know if you need counseling, maybe a friend to talk to would help? Hope you feel better soon.... ETA: I actually have no experience with counseling so can't say whether or not you need it :) <em>edited by AdviceSeeker on 17/10/2011</em>

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