Maid wants to break her contract - urgent help needed! | Page 2 | ExpatWoman.com
 

Maid wants to break her contract - urgent help needed!

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EW MASTER
Latest post on 30 April 2014 - 09:46
It was the illegal working that made me take notice. I know the maid isn't going to be banned, but just imagine if someone else on here employs her without a reference, then lands a 50k fine. It does look as if they are clamping down as I have heard from a number of people that residents, especially in Emaar properties are being visited. Perhaps this is only the start.
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EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 30 April 2014 - 09:27
Dear OP, When we moved to the UAE, I unfortunately had 2 very bad experiences with domestic help. I am a very cheerful person who grew up with househelp so I know very well how to treat a maid. This place almost changed my perception on how to treat people. Everywhere I turned, I was met with the same advice, you are too soft, you need to rule with an iron fist blah blah. The one person who grounded me was my husband, he insisted that the 3rd maid we have, we will open our home to her. If it does not work out then hard-luck, at-least we retain our dignity. I can say to you it's been just over 5 years, and we are very happy. Soon we will be off to her wedding, and she may resign to try something else, because I enabled her to do a secretarial course. I am very happy. When I look back at the past, I am peaceful, I know no one holds a grudge against me. Not saying fly in the sky and kiss your maid, have rules etc, but don't let this experience change you. And you handled it pretty well. Do not feel bad about the salary, its the consequences for her actions, which is fair in my opinion. I worry for your child, may you find someone better, who will be a constant. Ta!
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EW MASTER
Latest post on 30 April 2014 - 09:26
Hi ladies Do you recommend a change of approach? Yes, she's your maid not your friend. Start off over friendly and there's no way back. You dont have to be best mates to be treating her with kindness and respect. Let her earn bonuses over time for good work. It's hard to withdraw them when they've been there since day one and things start to slide. <em>edited by Sanddy_Dogg on 30/04/2014</em>
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EW MASTER
Latest post on 30 April 2014 - 09:25
Hi ladies I wanted to say a big thank you for your input and advice, it's been a very trying time. The reality is I have spoken to her and have confirmed that I will not be banning her or reporting her for the illegal work. I only found out about the latter because she ended up doing some work for a friend of a friend and it came to light by chance. Anyway - she did a great job and was a great nanny for the seven months she was with us. I believe she made a mistake and she feels bad about it, but she would still like to go home and see her family bc of the issue with her daughter. I have agreed to let her go, but I have retained her last salary's pay cheque to contribute towards the 5K that remained of the cost of her visa which will help towards the cost of her flight home and the new nanny's visa. I am just disappointed at how it has turned out bc to be honest I don't even have it in my heart to do this, but I've had my arm twisted as we can't really afford to waive the financial implications of her decision completely. Nevertheless, thank you for the input ladies, and I hope next time will be better! The only downside for me is this: I treated her as family, we paid well and we gave extras, plus presents for birthdays, Xmas, Easter, etc. I always let her go home even if there was stuff still to do when I came home from work bc I got that she had already put in a full day's work and had to travel to get home. I feel very naive now but more disappointed than anything bc I want to treat people well but feel v used and that makes me unsure of how to handle the situation next time. Do you recommend a change of approach? I just hope that you are honest if she asks you for references. Your maid could have completed her contract. It was only a few more months...
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EW GURU
Latest post on 30 April 2014 - 09:20
I paid all paper processing fee when I was working for a semi government company as I resigned before completing 1 year, I also paid an extra month salary as I didn't give a notice, I had an emergency & had to leave, so paying all this money was fair I guess, I didn't even get any leave allowance or annual ticket, although I was there for 11 months, I don't know why it should be different for maids, it is not charity, they know the terms, it is a limited 1 year contract, i think there should be rules to protect the employer in those circumstances, it is not cheap to get maid especially if it's through an agency.
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EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 30 April 2014 - 09:17
Hi ladies I wanted to say a big thank you for your input and advice, it's been a very trying time. The reality is I have spoken to her and have confirmed that I will not be banning her or reporting her for the illegal work. I only found out about the latter because she ended up doing some work for a friend of a friend and it came to light by chance. Anyway - she did a great job and was a great nanny for the seven months she was with us. I believe she made a mistake and she feels bad about it, but she would still like to go home and see her family bc of the issue with her daughter. I have agreed to let her go, but I have retained her last salary's pay cheque to contribute towards the 5K that remained of the cost of her visa which will help towards the cost of her flight home and the new nanny's visa. I am just disappointed at how it has turned out bc to be honest I don't even have it in my heart to do this, but I've had my arm twisted as we can't really afford to waive the financial implications of her decision completely. Nevertheless, thank you for the input ladies, and I hope next time will be better! The only downside for me is this: I treated her as family, we paid well and we gave extras, plus presents for birthdays, Xmas, Easter, etc. I always let her go home even if there was stuff still to do when I came home from work bc I got that she had already put in a full day's work and had to travel to get home. I feel very naive now but more disappointed than anything bc I want to treat people well but feel v used and that makes me unsure of how to handle the situation next time. Do you recommend a change of approach?
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EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 30 April 2014 - 09:03
Our first maid had the same issue as missed her kids and hubby, and was only 6/7 months into her contract. We asked her to stay until the end of her visa. You realise you will have to pay for her flight home too right - so are within your right to say no she's on a year contract. of course understand her situation is probably difficult for her. However, do believe if they see you as being weak they will take advantage. On another note, we are looking for a western family for our maid. We are going back home at the mid Aug. So looking to find her a replacement home at end of July when we are back. Although we are away on holiday from 3rd - 25 Jul so could help you out if you needed during this time - but have a dog so would be looking after the dog whilst we are away so could look to work on a temp basis / trial during July for you whilst we are away? If you are interested PM me
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EW MASTER
Latest post on 30 April 2014 - 08:51
huh ? doesnt make sense sorry .. recruitment fees are paid by companies not employees so why would employees be expected to pay ? sorry dont see the point of this post ! Of course it makes sense. It was suggested that a maid resigning should pay back visa costs paid by the employer Visa costs paid for a maid are similar to headhunter fees, they are both paid by the employer. Just as a normal employee would not pay back hedahunter fees, a maid should not have to pay back visa and recruitment fees Well in that case the maid should pay the agency fees..... is that what you are saying?
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EW MASTER
Latest post on 30 April 2014 - 08:50
Outside of the UAE how would this be handled? To even discuss or justify banning someone makes my skin crawl, I think as a society we can do better. edited by Prettyperfect on 30/04/2014 You can imagine people talk about such stuff back in their home country; "so we had a maid who resigned before her contract ended and that is why we banned her from working for a year. You have to be tough with such sorts you know, give them an inch, they will take a mile" Of course they won't put it like that because the reactions will likely not be positive. Yes but an employeer in the UK does not have to fork out 15K in fees to employ a maid..... they pay them minimum wage - khalas. Its comparing apples and pears.
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EW GURU
Latest post on 30 April 2014 - 08:49
huh ? doesnt make sense sorry .. recruitment fees are paid by companies not employees so why would employees be expected to pay ? sorry dont see the point of this post ! Of course it makes sense. It was suggested that a maid resigning should pay back visa costs paid by the employer Visa costs paid for a maid are similar to headhunter fees, they are both paid by the employer. Just as a normal employee would not pay back hedahunter fees, a maid should not have to pay back visa and recruitment fees
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EW GURU
Latest post on 30 April 2014 - 08:47
Outside of the UAE how would this be handled? To even discuss or justify banning someone makes my skin crawl, I think as a society we can do better. edited by Prettyperfect on 30/04/2014 You can imagine people talk about such stuff back in their home country; "so we had a maid who resigned before her contract ended and that is why we banned her from working for a year. You have to be tough with such sorts you know, give them an inch, they will take a mile" Of course they won't put it like that because the reactions will likely not be positive.
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EW EXPERT
Latest post on 30 April 2014 - 08:43
Agree if she is willing to pay back pro rota visa costs etc.... otherwise ban and not as a vengenful act but to stop other famallies suffering the same fate. Are office employees expected to pay back headhunter recruitment fees if they resign before the contract is over? huh ? doesnt make sense sorry .. recruitment fees are paid by companies not employees so why would employees be expected to pay ? sorry dont see the point of this post !
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EW GURU
Latest post on 30 April 2014 - 08:41
I disagree; she has signed a year long contract - that is her commitment and there should be consequences for not keeping to her commitment. If i signed a year long contract and after 7 months decided it wasn't for me, there would be consequence. Are you saying that because she is a maid that she should not be held to the same eithical standards as other people? Ethical standards? Are we living in a world where resigning before a contract is a crime? Do not forget that an employer of a maid or staff in a company is always free to terminate staff before their contract ends and give them a severance package. Employees should have the same right with some conditions in reverse such as paying back some amount etc. But a ban which effectively is stopping a person's ability to earn ?
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EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 30 April 2014 - 08:37
I disagree; she has signed a year long contract - that is her commitment and there should be consequences for not keeping to her commitment. If i signed a year long contract and after 7 months decided it wasn't for me, there would be consequence. Are you saying that because she is a maid that she should not be held to the same eithical standards as other people? No Izzy, I agree with what you are saying. I gave the example of how I received an automatic ban after 9 months. If the system did that for maids, then no issue. Note with my automatic ban I am able to lift it, meaning that the Govt understands that people WILL change jobs. However it is the requirement of you as the employer to make that decision that bothers me. My employer did not place a ban on me even though I broke the contract - and that's how it should be. This whole ban thing is akin to slavery. Outside of the UAE how would this be handled? To even discuss or justify banning someone makes my skin crawl, I think as a society we can do better. The Govt places the option, but can't we rise above it? Professionally and Domestic. <em>edited by Prettyperfect on 30/04/2014</em>
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EW GURU
Latest post on 30 April 2014 - 08:35
Agree if she is willing to pay back pro rota visa costs etc.... otherwise ban and not as a vengenful act but to stop other famallies suffering the same fate. Are office employees expected to pay back headhunter recruitment fees if they resign before the contract is over?
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EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 30 April 2014 - 08:30
unless she committed a crime. She has been working illegally. Putting herself at risk of imprisonment and deportation. Putting OP at risk of a 50k fine. Was she herself thinking of her kids and family? How is that for taking responsibility of her own actions? In my statement I chose to ignore the working illegally on the side because it is not very clear to me. Counting on the OP's judgement it could be possible. However as an outsider looking in, or if it were me, I would first verify my sources. And asking myself, who would most likely sell my maid out? Other maids. And what do these maids have to gain from it..... That's my line of thinking. Now given the fact that she already wants to leave and there is talk of illegal work, I would simply wash my hands of the matter and send her on her way. Hoping that her next employer will be more diligent. I would not place a ban unless I was absolutely certain that she had jeopardised my family. Once again, maybe I am naive.
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EW MASTER
Latest post on 30 April 2014 - 08:26
I disagree; she has signed a year long contract - that is her commitment and there should be consequences for not keeping to her commitment. If i signed a year long contract and after 7 months decided it wasn't for me, there would be consequence. Are you saying that because she is a maid that she should not be held to the same eithical standards as other people?
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EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 30 April 2014 - 08:26
Unlike most of us professional woman a ban on a domestic worker is a ban on her family, her kids etc. It is a catastrophic domino effect which you may never truly understand or ever have to face.. And the maid must take responsibility for this. Her family lose out as does the OP and her family. Give them an inch etc. Because she had the audacity to change her mind about working for the OP her family must suffer? In your profession, have you never changed jobs?
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EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 30 April 2014 - 08:16
. Unlike most of us professional woman a ban on a domestic worker is a ban on her family, her kids etc. It is a catastrophic domino effect which you may never truly understand or ever have to face. I implore the other ladies here too, unless she committed a crime and you are legally obliged, take the high road. I feel very passionately about this, because I volunteered at a shelter in the Philippines and saw the other side of the coin. Well said. It is sad to see so much anger and rage and calling for bans for a maid daring to want to leave before her contract ends. If she leaves before her contract ends, an employer can always refuse to pay for the ticket back, but banning a person from a job unless she definitely has done something criminal like stealing just smacks of a vengeful mindset. Agree if she is willing to pay back pro rota visa costs etc.... otherwise ban and not as a vengenful act but to stop other famallies suffering the same fate. At what cost would you be willing to bear with a maid you who has decided to leave but will stay on for an additional 3 months to pay off her visa? My current contract states that if I leave before probation I have to pay for my visa costs, I think its fair and I can afford it. Now with our housemaids its a different ball game all together, I imagine we as a family would no longer enjoy nor trust the benefits of having a domestic worker on notice. Note also that it is within her rights to decide this is not for her. She too has a family, or whatever clandestine reason it may be, fact is she can no longer exist in the house. I would just write it off as a bad decision on my part, unfortunate and learn from it by trying to incorporate the whole pay for visa issue at start of contract - although it would be a threat I would never follow through on. Also note the OP stated that she was an otherwise very good housemaid whom she counted on dearly, can we not thank her for her time served and send her on her way in peace? Maybe I am just naive, but I like to believe that a little of my blood has not been tainted by these Dubai nuances.
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EW OLDHAND
Latest post on 30 April 2014 - 08:13
You cannot refuse to pay her ticket home if you are not transferring her visa to another sponsor. You are legally obliged to send her home if you are cancelling her visa. When she gets back to her home country , her husband will have to do the necessary for her to return on his visa. My understanding is that you cannot directly transfer your sponsorship visa to her husbands spouse visa. Good luck with it all. <em>edited by mum2girls on 30/04/2014</em>
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EW MASTER
Latest post on 30 April 2014 - 06:55
. Unlike most of us professional woman a ban on a domestic worker is a ban on her family, her kids etc. It is a catastrophic domino effect which you may never truly understand or ever have to face. I implore the other ladies here too, unless she committed a crime and you are legally obliged, take the high road. I feel very passionately about this, because I volunteered at a shelter in the Philippines and saw the other side of the coin. Well said. It is sad to see so much anger and rage and calling for bans for a maid daring to want to leave before her contract ends. If she leaves before her contract ends, an employer can always refuse to pay for the ticket back, but banning a person from a job unless she definitely has done something criminal like stealing just smacks of a vengeful mindset. Agree if she is willing to pay back pro rota visa costs etc.... otherwise ban and not as a vengenful act but to stop other famallies suffering the same fate.
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EW GURU
Latest post on 29 April 2014 - 22:54
. Unlike most of us professional woman a ban on a domestic worker is a ban on her family, her kids etc. It is a catastrophic domino effect which you may never truly understand or ever have to face. I implore the other ladies here too, unless she committed a crime and you are legally obliged, take the high road. I feel very passionately about this, because I volunteered at a shelter in the Philippines and saw the other side of the coin. Well said. It is sad to see so much anger and rage and calling for bans for a maid daring to want to leave before her contract ends. If she leaves before her contract ends, an employer can always refuse to pay for the ticket back, but banning a person from a job unless she definitely has done something criminal like stealing just smacks of a vengeful mindset.
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EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 29 April 2014 - 22:48
Sorry pretty perfect re read,realised I got your name wrong, sorry but really agreed with you:)
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EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 29 April 2014 - 22:32
When reading the posts I agreed in principal with all and without a doubt the maid needs to take responsibility for her choice to leave the contract just as we all would have to do. I understand the emotions behind the ban because when one is or has been in that situation it is not nice and you feel very hard done by but as perfect Polly said (sorry not quoting directly) we are professional women and have to rise above the situation and find the balance. In my opinion a ban is the last straw and not easily done and for reasons beyond return. If labour puts an automatic ban then that may change the maids mind in going and gives more time to find a replacement. If you decide to continue until her contract ends, get her to sign an amendment in her contract (easily typed by yourself) stating that under no circumstance should she work for anyone else etc. We need to stick together on this issue, we want a good maid, want to treat her well but don't want to be taking for a fool. In reality it is okay she leaves but not okay for you to pay her for the privilege to leave early, you pay her a good salary and in what you said you are so good to her, you won't have any trouble finding someone else (I won't pay extra for babysitting, just me) we have all been there, blessed when we find someone good, even this maid is just trying her luck to make more money it's illegal here but that doesn't mean it is immoral (okay probably wrong choice of word but you know what I mean!) don't take it personally, think of it as business and decide a way it works best for both of you, sorry long post, on phone so can't easily see how much I've went on but you're all women and understand that I hope!
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EW EXPERT
Latest post on 29 April 2014 - 21:50
unless she committed a crime. She has been working illegally. Putting herself at risk of imprisonment and deportation. Putting OP at risk of a 50k fine. Was she herself thinking of her kids and family? How is that for taking responsibility of her own actions?
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EW GURU
Latest post on 29 April 2014 - 21:27
Unlike most of us professional woman a ban on a domestic worker is a ban on her family, her kids etc. It is a catastrophic domino effect which you may never truly understand or ever have to face.. And the maid must take responsibility for this. Her family lose out as does the OP and her family. Give them an inch etc.
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EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 29 April 2014 - 20:50
As professional women we rejoiced when the ban rules were eased. I recently switched jobs within 6 months of my employment. While my employer was disappointed I did not receive a ban from them. I did however receive the automatic ban from labour which I have lifted using my better position, salary etc. As a woman's forum, I would like you to rise above the injustice you have experienced. Do exactly what is required of you and send her packing. Unlike most of us professional woman a ban on a domestic worker is a ban on her family, her kids etc. It is a catastrophic domino effect which you may never truly understand or ever have to face. I implore the other ladies here too, unless she committed a crime and you are legally obliged, take the high road. I feel very passionately about this, because I volunteered at a shelter in the Philippines and saw the other side of the coin.
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EW GURU
Latest post on 29 April 2014 - 20:43
I'd take Oopsiedaisys advice. Apart from the ban part. Your daughter might be besotted but your maid obviously hasn't considered this in her choice. Why would you not ban her? because she hasn't done anything seriously wrong.
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EW MASTER
Latest post on 29 April 2014 - 19:42
I'd take Oopsiedaisys advice. Apart from the ban part. Your daughter might be besotted but your maid obviously hasn't considered this in her choice. Why would you not ban her?
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EW GURU
Latest post on 29 April 2014 - 19:36
I'd take Oopsiedaisys advice. Apart from the ban part. Your daughter might be besotted but your maid obviously hasn't considered this in her choice.
 
 

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