Dummy \ pacifier babies

Hi Aussiepup, I went through a phase of this with DD a couple of weeks ago, it was taking so long to settle her. Swaddling her again made an enormous difference. Now if I don't swaddle her the effort I have to go through to get her to sleep is enormous and she gets overtired like you said. Another Aussie EW (sydneygal) said she used Woombie swaddles and so I have ordered some because she does break out of the blanket I use now.. I'll let you know how they go. My LO still needs her dummy during swaddling but relies on it less and just today I took it out while she was drowsy, she opened her eyes and I thought 'oh no' but she drifted off again without a peep. I have been doing the Pantley pull out and I think it might be working (touch wood)...

I remember DD went through a phase at around the 3 to 4 month mark where she refused the dummy despite normally relying on it throughout the day and night. But this was a short phase and she gradually returned to crying for it. We also swaddled her because she would wake herself otherwise and it wasn't until about 7 months or so where she properly figured out how to find it in her cot and put it back in her mouth. Like Kiwi, we have got her down to using it as a sleep cue only. I haven't tried taking it away recently and may do so since she has recently decided she no longer wants to drink from a baby bottle - who knows, she may forget it!

Giving up the dummy in a small baby is often not as bad as you fear. When ds was 8 months we went cold turkey on a Thursday and by Sunday it was as if he'd never had one. I've heard it gets a lot harder after a year though. We're trying to avoid the dummy with our nb this time (because of the searching for it in the night thing) but not sure we'll make it, almost cracked last night when she didn't settle from 12-3.

Thanks Flydiver, thats a good idea, a bit like how breastfeeding ended for us, not me cutting my nipples off ;) but me begin pregnant and gradually my milk ran out so he totally lost interest and just stopped asking. It would be great if he could do the same with the dummy. My worry is that if he does give up on the dummy he'll also give up on being such a great sleeper. Right now he sleeps 12 at night plus a 4 hour day nap, and its virtually effortless to put him down, (even in the pram) which is great for me as I can have a nap and will be even better when my newborn arrives end of September. I have sort of decided that we'll probably keep the dummy until he gives up the day nap and probably by then he'll be old enough to do the dummy fairy type stuff too. Since I've stopped breastfeeding though he has started asking for his dummy outside of sleep times, like when he's a bit tired late afternoon and wants a cuddle (would have normally been a BF). I might try the cut off dummy one of those times and see what happens, will report back. Sterilization, LOL, has been a long time since I've done that.

Hi Flydiver11, I also read that cutting the end off is a good one and cutting progressively more off each week. I also read that poking pinholes in the end of the dummy will help to wean, and you add progressively more holes over time. Sterilisation might become an issue though? *ETA oh an another one is to not buy the size up.. I was considering putting some pinholes in a dummy or two, though our LO is only 4 months and I think it is too soon?? Or perhaps better now than later? What do you all think? <em>edited by sparkly on 05/07/2012</em>

The Dummy Fairy came to our house when DD was about 2.5 years old. Left pressies (small pots of playdoh, stickers etc.) for every night she managed without it. Took about 3 nights for her to not need it.

My LO doesn't have a dummy. I know if that is a good or a bad thing, as sometimes when we travel or we are out of the house I would kill for him to have such a simple sleep cue. But I must say, he's a brilliant napper at home and sleeps like a dream at night (touching wood as I type that), so maybe not searching for a dummy is a good thing. He's a thumb sucker though, so I have no idea how hard that habit will be to break, as my sister in law is 44 and still sucks hers when she sleeps. Anyway, just wanted to tell KW that my friend had a nightmare getting her two year old to give up his dummy, and a doctor suggested cutting the tip off so the effect is gone, but still giving them the dummy. She said that it was almost instant that he just lost interest. Hope that helps :)

have been reading all the posts regarding sleep. getting to know a lot of things from different experiences. now finally have time to write :) thanks alot kiwispiers for that wonderful book. so far have been trying to schedule my DS's sleeping and i have reached from 1'o clock to 10:30-11 pm in 10 days. today he went to sleep at 9:30.cooed and smiled alot at me but i was persistent,kept on rocking him.didn't talked to him (although tempted). it took 50 min but he went to sleep at 9:30! woke up again at 10:30. whimpered for some time then after 15 min had to pick him up and he went back to sleep. slowly i will succed. I have tried dummy/pacifiers ( DS is 2 and a half month old) but he does not take any. i am double minded about pacifiers. its good he does not take it but there are times when i wish he would take one (he cries with his eyes closed and does not listen then ) he does not even like his thumb to suck. he only sucks on his fists and that too at times for feed not always. i am still not able to make him fall asleep on his own. when he is drowsy enough i put him down he wakes up and starts to whimper or would be awake and alert. daytimes are same. i have to see if he is tired and put him to sleep by rocking. these rocking motions have started to give me stomach pains (c-section and my healthy boy :) ). have shown to doctor but she says healing is fine.i have cramps like pain at times :( i just hope he learns soon to sleep on his own! establishing a routine for babies is so tough! phew!! ps:sorry meant to add this on sleep thread! <em>edited by angel joy on 04/07/2012</em>

Hi Aussiepup, I almost wrote a very similar post! Only a few differences, our LO is 4 months and she has not been sick but I suspect teething might have started so dummy was used more lately to settle her... Though I noticed she was getting addicted a while back and reduced use, the dependency has reared it's ugly head this week and only yesterday we had such a crappy napping day that I was about to write a similar post this evening.. Last night was also terrible as she woke up often. Perhaps it is a growth spurt but the dummy is involved for sure. She has been so difficult to settle for sleep both day and night lately, sometimes taking in excess of 40 to 60 minutes to settle from when she showed her tired signs and reasons why are that she just loves to use her hands. Both to suck on (but not to sleep) and at this age she has started to realise hands are very useful things. She plays with her comforter (near, far, near, far) when I put her down and if I take that away she plays with the dummy (in, out, in, out) drops it then yells that she wants it back. Ugh. This morning I held her tight and she drifted off nicely. So then I read some posts on here and decided to swaddle for the next cycle. I swaddled her arms and kept her legs out as she is a big kicker and she slept like a baby, literally. Her morning nap has never been so good (touch wood) and her afternoon nap was 2.5 hours WOW. She took the dummy to settle but she spits it out as usual after about 15 minutes, just before she drifts into a deep sleep for the first cycle. Only thing is now how do we deal with the dummy issue if it starts to interfere with each cycle. Maybe she will continue to spit it out but problem is she refuses to begin her sleep without it right now. I am in the same boat as Kiwispiers as she settles so well with it and plus I need it to settle her in the car sometimes (as she hates sitting in the back rear facing alone) but I don't want to wake up anymore than I did last night. So I have decided that while we are swaddling to try the pull out method so she does the last bit of settling without it. Perhaps this is a good way to keep it for the settling but reduce the risk of the dependency to sleep. I think taking it away is not as easy as it is made out to be. If they are very oral like yours and mine, then I imagine it would be a terrible and very trying time for all if we went cold turkey. I'll let you know how it goes tonight! x

Tricky one, 3.5 months is right when dummy dependency issues can start to rear their ugly heads and many experts advise this to be the best time to take the dummy away. basically you keep the dummy in via swaddling, once you stop swaddling they tend to knock it out with their hands. I used to swaddle DS's upper half only leaving his legs out, this meant he was less likely to overheat and it also made it much harder for him to escape his swaddle, as he couldn't use his legs to kick his way out. We used miracle swaddles and just didn't put his legs in the foot pocket bit. At this stage in the game you might want to forget swaddling and the dummy (maybe replace with white noise) and use a shush/pat type technique to get him off to sleep, or you could introduce a cuddle and dummy to soothe him, and then take the dummy out when you actually put him to bed, so its part of his go to bed routine but he doesn't actually fall asleep with it. If his arms are out you could try to teach him to find his thumb, you might have thumb sucking issues to deal with later but thumb suckers do seem to be good sleepers! Sorry I'm not much help, I'm really in two minds about dummies, I feel like I would never have stuck with BFing without using one, and it has been so amazing as a sleep cue, and yet, we have gone through the worst patches of sleep due to him being so hooked on the dummy and waking for it after every sleep cycle, until he was old enough to put it back in. DS will be 2 next month, and despite me originally planning to take the dummy away before he was 4 months, he still has it, in fact he has about 6 in his cot right now. I have no idea how I'm going to take it away. Really don't know if I'll give baby number two a dummy or not. Are you sure he isn't pushing the dummy out because he is hungry, or, if he is still sore from the ear infection, maybe sucking is painful right now?