going crazy - 2 yr old sleep | ExpatWoman.com
 

going crazy - 2 yr old sleep

429
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EW EXPLORER
Latest post on 25 June 2011 - 17:22

DS 2 yr going thru terrible twos, but this is insane.
He resists sleep so much that he is exhausted, cranky and terrible. This has been happening for for more than a year now, but then i dint have another baby to look after also.
Even if I get him to his bed on time, he will roll, and twist, and then ask me something (which i ignore), and eventually takes about 45min-1hr (on mad nights more) to sleep.
Even after having a morning out and playing in the humid evening outside, he takes time to sleep.
For instance, last thu he had 10hrs (2hr nap) of sleep in 24hrs.. again friday he had 10hrs of sleep, and now today he is so cranky, exhausted, but i had to battle him to take a nap today, which he slept only for 2 hrs. He has atleast 4-6hrs of sleep to catch up on.
Whatever time he sleeps at night, he wakes at dot 6:15 in the morning. This is with blackouts on the window.
DH and I alternate putting him to bed cos its just too much for me, but when DH puts him to sleep its a screaming session. He wants me only.
We r just at the end of our thether. Just want him to sleep atleast 12-13hrs per 24hrs, which i think is how much a 2yr old shud sleep anyways!
How on earth can i get this child to sleep enough? He doesnt sleep if he is tired, he doesnt sleep if he is over tired.
He;s like this energizer bunny.. keeps going on and on and on...
PLs help wise ladies of EW.. i am counting on you.

429
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EW EXPLORER
Latest post on 26 June 2011 - 07:53
5:45... aarrgghh!!!! concealer doesnt work!!!
1861
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EW EXPERT
Latest post on 25 June 2011 - 23:00
Osteopaths use the same kind of principles as acupuncturists - putting pressure on key points to release tension/ energy. In babies/ toddlers, that tension can manifest is digestion and sleep problems... in adults it's all the aches and pains we get! It may be worth a try... you just never know! In fairness, from what you've said, it sounds like you're doing everything you can and it all sounds pretty normal. I'm guessing that the main bother is the fact that you have to (or "do") stay with him while he falls asleep... and you have better things to do! Have you tried just... not? My DD went through phases of wanting to fall asleep next to her, but after a while, I just had to go the tough love route and say "enough already". We also had a stairgate on her bedroom door - equally for her safety as for our sanity and will be doing the same for DS when we train him to go to sleep in his Big Bed.
587
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EW GURU
Latest post on 25 June 2011 - 21:47
It sounds mean but we had a stair gate across our DD door, so if she did not want to sleep she did not have to, but she was confined to her room. We also used controlled crying from the 'Taming the Toddler' book, on rare occasions.
429
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EW EXPLORER
Latest post on 25 June 2011 - 21:38
Sorry, but what does an osteopath do?? DS was totally normal delivery.. he literally flew out of me. Food wise, he isnt allowed to eat any sugar after 5pm and bedtime is at 6:45. Daddy doesnt feed him anything without asking me especially after 4pm. He has his own bed which is 1foot away from our bed and i do either sit next to him or lie next to him.. still takes an hour. Today was 55mins with me lieing next to him! And he was sooo sleepy.. his eyes would droop and then suddenly he wud fidget or something and keep himself awake! Grr! He has activities during the day.. he is at his cousins place in the day time, or we go out.. or i take him to a play area..or something...i dont overtire him cos i know its a nightmare to get him to bed.. yet, i do give him things to do, let him play in the garden i evening if we have had a day in, etc. Actually the whole bedtime routine is quite nice.. he has his bubble bath with his duckies while i feed and out dd to sleep.. then we play for abt 5min with the bubbles and then shower, brush teeth, he chooses his nightwear, etc etc.. its s whole 45min-1hr process which i think is plenty time to relax and unwind.. I dont get upset initially.. but after abt 45min i do get annoyed.. :( <em>edited by shaf on 25/06/2011</em>
1861
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EW EXPERT
Latest post on 25 June 2011 - 20:03
hmmm... it sounds as if it's a whole big battle and you - because you're at the end of your tether (and understandably) are trying to chop and change and impose things on him. I guess I'm refering to the "right, you're not allowed a nap now"/ "now you can have a nap" and the "wear him out completely" vs "stay at home to not tire him." First and foremost, even though it's aggravating, sometimes even the best sleepers take a while to settle down to sleep. My two can sometimes chatter and play for a couple of hours before drifting off, but they stay in their room, we don't turn the lights on, don't encourage them and generally leave tehm to it, but would pop in to calm them and remind them what they're actually meant to be doing if it gets too raucous. Secondly, there needs to be balance in his daytime activities - I know that I (and my children) start to get "cabin fever" and go a bit doolally if we don't get out of the apartment each day, but at the same time, if you're doing something active, it's important to have relaxation time too. Your bedtime routine should be an integral part of going to bed and so try to give the whole thing the same, relaxed feel. I know it's easier said than done, but if you're giving off stressed, angry vibes in preparation for the "fight" that you imagine/ know is coming, then kiddo will pick up on it and wham, out goes all the good work getting him nice and relaxed! I'd also suggest, Like MaidB, seeing an osteopath, which can help, and also looking to his diet - really carefully. make a diary of what he eats and when and then, if applicable, make some adjustments. Get everyone in your household to help you do this - you may find out that Daddy has been giving him a cheeky bedtime sweetie or that he's stoked full of fruit juice!
18
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EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 25 June 2011 - 18:08
have you got to the bottom of what it is that is waking him up? (DS has had sleep issues until now and he is nearly 5!). Things that have helped with us are putting a little night light in his room. Rewarding sleeping well (Easier at this age but harder at 2). Finding out if he is having bad dreams etc. Why is he taking so long to settle/getting hysterical (are you trying CIO?) - maybe he's a bit too old for that now and just needs you to get into bed with him for ten minutes til he goes back to sleep? Not ideal but if it gets him back to sleep quickly then it's worth it. We took DS to a cranial osteopath (manipulates cranial bones/skull) - really made a difference with his sleep. (Some babies who have had a difficult birth/forceps etc have never adjusted with their cranial bones so they can still be a little óut'). Also his paediatrician said, you know what, just put a mattress beside your bed and let him sleep there, he'll be happy, you'll be happy, everyone will be asleep ;) What about letting him have his afternoon nap, but making it shorter, if he wants it. If he doesn't want it but then gets cranky at about 4pm, (boy this is when you need a dvd for an hour lol!) then it would be dinner/bed time.
429
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EW EXPLORER
Latest post on 25 June 2011 - 17:55
oh we have tried not putting in the nap... and staying in at home so he doesnt get overtired.. but then he starts getting extremely cranky by 3-4pm and then gets very badly behaved, and its v difficult for me to manage him and another baby.. and then finally when he does sleep, he wakes up once or twice crying for me... and its a hysterical crying which takes an hour or so to cal him.. we have tried it for almost a monht or 2 without a nap.. dint work. And yea, he has a good long bath, brush, story etc wind up time before bed which he actually look forwards to.. and in fact getting him to bed is not a problem, its getting him to sleep thats the problem. I will settle for 12hrs of sleep.. anything less than that makes him v crnaky.. have experimented with 8hrs of sleep till 13hrs.. 12 hrs is best for him. he doesnt watch TV.
18
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EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 25 June 2011 - 17:47
Shaf if you want him to sleep for longer, you'll def have to cut that 2 hour nap out in the afternoon. (DS is similar) and will get his deepest sleep during that 2 hours during the day, so by night-time he is actually feeling quite refreshed. Try a whole different routine, try and keep him as awake as possible during the day (but not over-tiring him which from experience with DS can put them into super-hyper mode and give you just as bad a night's sleep!) Somtimes you think you are doing the right thing by over exhausting them so they sleep at night but they can be just as restless and unsettled when they are exhausted. I guess you are doing the whole warm bath/snuggling up with a book thing...just have a week of trying a new routine, don't let DS see that it is stressful, make bedtime a calming experience, you could even put on one of the baby einstein dvd's they are very chilled and sleep inducing. Btw, some kids just generally need less sleep so while you want him to sleep 13 hours in 24, he may just not need that much and you may have to accept that he only has 11 or so... DS has never had more than that in his life! Some children are just generally more active/awake than others. I guess like adults. we are all different in our sleep patterns etc so children are too. btw. 6:15 is a lie-in. :D
 
 

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