DD cries every morning when I drop her at the nursery | ExpatWoman.com
 

DD cries every morning when I drop her at the nursery

43
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 30 October 2012 - 23:33

Hi Ladies,
My DD is 2 years-old. She's been in the nursery (same one) for more than a year now and every morning I have to go in with her (there she starts nagging), wait a bit until she gets busy to sneak away (I know it's not healthy at all), she usually ends up by finding it out and starts crying. The teacher tells me she cries just for 5 minutes then she perfectly adapts and spends a busy happy day, while mine is ruined as I leave feeling guilty and sorrowful, until afternoon when I go back to pick her up. I don't doubt the teachers words because this happens even at home if I'm leaving her with my hubby. I want to have a balanced goodbye where she would know I'm not leaving her for long but I'm going back later. I know it's my fault I didn't teach her so when she was few months old, as some of my friends say, but I hope it's still early to be fixed. This is really tiring and nerve-breaking and any suggestion or experience would be welcome.
Thank you

43
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 02 November 2012 - 13:40
Ladies thank you so much for your replies! They were so helpful. I'll definitely work on my attitude :) <em>edited by Spiritedaway53 on 02/11/2012</em>
1234
Posts
EW OLDHAND
Latest post on 31 October 2012 - 11:34
Oh, I so agree with others - please don't sneak out. Have a proper but brief good-bye and then just turn around and walk out without looking back. Don't feel guilty - children pick up on this and that could be one of the reasons that she cries. Also keep talking through and preparing her for your leave, but make sure to tell her that you will be back to pick her up (i.e. after they have snack and play, whatever their schedule is). It's not too late to do this and she will adapt :)
943
Posts
EW GURU
Latest post on 31 October 2012 - 10:45
I agree with the other posters - I think part of the issue is because you sneak out, so your daughter doesn't know that you have left and isn't reassured that you're coming back. You need to smile at her and say "mommy is going now, I will be back in a little while". Then wave at her and let her see you go. When you disappear whilst her back is turned it's distressing her.
784
Posts
EW GURU
Latest post on 31 October 2012 - 10:21
Perhaps you talk to her and say that you will have a super fun day at school spending time with teachers and friends. And I got this super useful tip from a friend who said, don't say good bye when you drop her off. say ok have fun, see you later!!' and when you pick her up, say hi!! with a big smile like you are super excited to see her. she mimics your reaction, if you are sad when picking her up, she will be the same too. At home, I talk to DD and ask her what did she do in school and get her really excited to get back tomorrow. DD was like that the first couple of days. Now she drops my hand and the door to rush into her class. oh, when drop off, if there is an assistant to welcome her and if she says to your DD, ok say bye to mummy, tell the assistant to change and say see you later instead. It works!! :D
1236
Posts
EW OLDHAND
Latest post on 31 October 2012 - 02:26
My DS used to bring the place down when I left him at playgroup. He knew he was going and grizzled all the way then sprung the waterworks when I handed him over to the playleader. He cried for about about 3 minutes then got on with his day of fun! I simply kissed and hugged him goodbye and said "see you in a while, mummy going shopping and will get something nice for lunch/dinner" I was very matter of fact and basically ignored the crying. Believe me, your LO will be fine! My DS is now 30 years old, living and working in Dubai and has no abandonment issues! Honestly, your little one is fine, you're the one who is suffering. Lose the guilt and enjoy your bit of child free time :) <em>edited by JoyceB on 31/10/2012</em>
 
 

ON EXPATWOMAN TODAY