Do guests pay for themselves at a baby shower? | ExpatWoman.com
 

Do guests pay for themselves at a baby shower?

504
Posts
EW GURU
Latest post on 01 June 2013 - 01:26

Hi,
Im throwing a last minute shower for a friend who's given me a list of 28 people. I dont know any of them. She wants to have it at her place, but its tiny. So Im wondering....

If you went to a baby shower in a restaurant, would you expect to pay for yourself?
Or would the person throwing the shower pay?

Also if you think the guests should pay, should the cost be printed on the invitation?
Or just the venue? I'm new to this and welcome any tips.
Thanks :)

804
Posts
EW GURU
Latest post on 01 June 2013 - 09:16
Thanks for the replies ladies. I appreciate your insight. I'd usually throw it at my place, however we have a large family of visitors, and my house looks like a bomb has hit it. I'll go ahead and have it at hers. I don't mind doing/paying for the catering, I'm just worried where every one will sit/fit. Would be much more comfortable doing this and asking for help if I knew anyone on the list. I'm sure it will be fine though. Thanks again :) Even if you don't know anyone on 'the list', this is a great way to touch base before the festivities. I would -- if it were me -- contact everyone and ask them to contribute. Only the weirdos won't get into the spirit of the occasion, promise. And this way, you will sort of 'know' people before they arrive. It's a way for them to help -- most people like to do that, seriously! -- and it becomes an event where everyone is helping and involved rather than something to which people have been invited and they just let the party roll over them. I have organised three baby showers in the past, and I was phoning people I didn't know for help and it was so lovely how everyone wanted to pitch in and feel like they were a part of it. There were the 'oohs' and 'aahs' over somebody's fabulous baby-styled cupcakes, and more for the decorations someone else had contributed ... this should be a group thing -- if you're having it at home with strangers -- and I reiterate, it's a great way to get to know the guests and make them feel involved. Have fun. Don't worry about the size of your venue. And let people feel like they're a part of it too. You will have a ball. :)
504
Posts
EW GURU
Latest post on 01 June 2013 - 09:02
Thanks for the replies ladies. I appreciate your insight. I'd usually throw it at my place, however we have a large family of visitors, and my house looks like a bomb has hit it. I'll go ahead and have it at hers. I don't mind doing/paying for the catering, I'm just worried where every one will sit/fit. Would be much more comfortable doing this and asking for help if I knew anyone on the list. I'm sure it will be fine though. Thanks again :)
804
Posts
EW GURU
Latest post on 01 June 2013 - 08:32
I've been to other showers and I'd say they are nicer in someone's home. Why not gather 3 or 4 of the other ladies and make all the food yourselves and host in someone's home. One lady can be in charge of drinks, 2 make food and sandwiches and one make the cake. You can buy nice decorations and make pretty favours quite cheaply with bags from dragonmart, pink jellybeans etc. Absolutely agree with this. To the OP: is there someone among the 28 who might have a bigger space in which to host this shindig? Seriously, it is really just so much nicer to have it at home. Everyone can relax, people who are 'indulging' in a bubbly or two can do so, you can make it a group event so that everyone brings a plate of something lovely to eat, you can play games (if you're into that sort of baby shower thing!). The best baby showers I've attended have been 'at home' and they have been intimate, friendly, caring events. And so much more personal than having it at a hotel/venue. And PS. Even alleged 'non-cooks' can get into the spirit of the occasion by bringing along something to eat. There are loads of websites with recipes etc which will furnish your needs for baby-shower-appropriate food. But whatever you decide, enjoy. :)
1337
Posts
EW OLDHAND
Latest post on 01 June 2013 - 06:50
Flydiver :), nip on over to mumsnet and post this question - if you dare :D Or perhaps it would be better for you read existing replies to this kind of question - that way you'll know the abusive replies aren't being directed at you personally. :D You might find the odd nice reply though that will kind of compensate a wee bit for the others. :) But seriously this kind of thing is a minefield and I would be inclined to do what my friend wants and squeeze every one into her place. If it really wouldn't work then ask her to cut down on numbers or not have the shower at all. Or ask one of the 'guests' on the guest list to host the party if space is available. It should be her doing the asking though because there will be a bill to pick up for food etc and she should be picking it up since she seems to be the one wanting the baby shower. If someone else had said oh lets do a shower for so and so and its at my place then I would expect them to pick up the bill for the food and sundries. If you invite people to your house you generally pay to host them. The other thing is to perhaps ask people to bring a plate of something if one of the other ladies can host the 28 pals and you dont want her landed with any expense.
1759
Posts
EW EXPERT
Latest post on 01 June 2013 - 06:26
The word "guest" says it all - guests do not pay when they are invited to any party. An interesting, sometimes entertaining, and often cringe worthy website is www.etiquettehell.com - it covers everything from baby showers to funerals.
118
Posts
EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 01 June 2013 - 01:33
In a restaurant I would presume I would be paying for myself. Could you find a place with a set price menu that you could enclose with the invite?
 
 

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