How old was LO before date night w DH? | ExpatWoman.com
 

How old was LO before date night w DH?

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EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 08 February 2013 - 19:38

Hi Ladies,
My LO is not yet sleeping through the night and as we are still BFing, when she wakes I go to her. She is 11 months and with valentines day just around the corner, there is pressure from family to leave her with them while we go on our first date night since she was born.
To be honest I am not ready, and DH is not really keen on leaving her either. I guess it's just a first time parent thing, and perhaps we are a little extreme but we are simply very attached and like to be near her. Going out for the evening would probably just result in us worrying about her anyway!!

So, just now there was a conversation about leaving her for valentines and I am now feeling a bit upset that family doesn't understand that I / we are not going to be going out, as its just another day after all. They say she will cry just as she does when she is being put down for a nap when i am out, which breaks my heart to hear that as it is.

Hope to get some advice, or at least some similar stories to make me feel normal.

1381
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EW OLDHAND
Latest post on 09 February 2013 - 12:41
we went out when my ds was 2 month old as my mother was flying back. since then we have not been out. i just don't feel like leaving him with the babysitter for now. although i think i should leave him for some time now but during the day as he is too clingy to me.he is 10 month old and as others said still not sleeping through the night and only sleeps when given breastfeed.valentines is just another day. for me its a day when i can eat cake or choc without thinking twice :D. we realized that right now we enjoy more with him at beach or in the park rather then anywhere. so we do that every weekendand sometimes we take long walks in the evening after his bedtime rituals so he falls asleep in the stroller and we have time for ourselves to talk.
200
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EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 09 February 2013 - 10:29
Thanks Daza, that's a great idea!! I have also taken Labrador's advice and we are going out for lunch instead. Both DH and I are very comfy with that as DD is used to other people during the days. Thanks again JoyceB, we'll get there eventually. First stop will be the Maldives :-)
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EW OLDHAND
Latest post on 09 February 2013 - 03:00
Thanks JoyceB! We actually live with family, 8 of us total. Yep. So DD is a very social little gal and vey used to others. It's just the nights... Sounds lovely!! I still maintain that you and DH were a couple before your LO was on the scene and before you know it, you will be a couple again once your LO is grown so need to keep that relationship alive. My "children" are 33 and 30 and from a very young age, were taught that mum and dad need their space too. We are 36 years married in March and still have our Valentine dinners out. We go away somewhere for every single anniversary. These days, is no issue but when our children were young, they were told that mum and dad needed special time together and they were happy to have special time with grandma or gran and their 2 papas.
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EW MASTER
Latest post on 08 February 2013 - 22:52
The point of date night is that it's meant to be a nice thing to do for you and your husband. Therefore, if you aren't ready or don't won't to do it, don't! If your family really feels like you and your husband need some special time together on Valentines then maybe they could all go out and give you an evening home together just you two and your baby?
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EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 08 February 2013 - 21:16
Feeling better already :-) thank you Labrador and Anon. We went out only occasionally before DD arrived, so we're not missing anything It really isn't a huge thing for us to go out, but I felt a bit of judgement today from family and I think it will keep coming until V day is over and done with. Thanks again x .
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EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 08 February 2013 - 21:08
Hi Sparkly, I totally understand you. My DD is 6 months old and I haven't left her with anyone for the evening time. I am still breastfeeding as well and when she wakes up for any reason she can only get back to sleep on the breast. I assume she would eventually fall asleep after crying for some time but I don't think I could enjoy that evening out. If neither of you are keen on going out that day, then don't go. :-) as you said, it's just another day. Or go out for lunch or spend some time with your DH when you know your DD is happily playing with your family. The whole point is to have some time with him anyway, isn't it?
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EW MASTER
Latest post on 08 February 2013 - 21:01
I breastfed my second child and she did not sleep through the night until she was 24 months old. Soon after that, we started having date nights. I am now breast feeding my third child. He doesn't sleep through the night and he's almost 8 months old. I will resume date nights with my husband once he starts sleeping through the night. If you and your husband aren't too keen on date nights, I wouldn't bother. I personally do not like going out at night but I know my husband does...
200
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EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 08 February 2013 - 20:48
Thanks JoyceB! We actually live with family, 8 of us total. Yep. So DD is a very social little gal and vey used to others. It's just the nights...
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EW OLDHAND
Latest post on 08 February 2013 - 20:46
My DD was 6 weeks old when we went out together for the first time and my parents babysat. It is important that your LO is socialised from an early age IMO and gets used to being away from you for short periods of time otherwise you will have a very clingy child on your hands and your anxiety will rub off on your wee one. Both of mine spent weekends with grandparents and other relatives from a very early age.
 
 

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