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Can I write "No siblings please" on party invitations?

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182

Posts

EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 08 March 2011 - 00:31

hahahaha Wuffles. I'm not your most creative nor imaginative writer and so I think my last post will have to stay!!!! ;)

1996

Posts

EW EXPERT

Latest post on 08 March 2011 - 00:30

I thank the Lord that I don't have small children here to have to do parties and people taking the p*ss in thinking that I would be a babysitting service!!! I'm so grateful that I can just send my teenage DS with a booty bag (from the Milkman!) to a party of his choice and where he can sleep it off if need be!!! Tongue in cheek!!! ;) Sh!t post for #4000 sis :) lol! Just realised!!! That serves me right for not being so sad that I have to count my posts!!!! :) I can delete my post and then you can delete yours and then you can write something insightful for the 4000th!!

277

Posts

EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 08 March 2011 - 00:30

I must be out of the loop! I am in the same loop as you wuffles and it is a long way from Mariana. At home I would spend the equivalent of 100 - 150aed per gift and wouldn't dream of offering cash or vouchers instead especially for a under 13 year old. At Christmas we had a party in the garden, and all invites and some uninvited guests they all turn with gifts for the LO in their hands ...To mention 80% Muslim including us and 99% childless Various gifts which includes the Barbie in a fashion fairytale priced over 450 DHS....I mention it to give you a insight of different cultures

182

Posts

EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 08 March 2011 - 00:26

I thank the Lord that I don't have small children here to have to do parties and people taking the p*ss in thinking that I would be a babysitting service!!! I'm so grateful that I can just send my teenage DS with a booty bag (from the Milkman!) to a party of his choice and where he can sleep it off if need be!!! Tongue in cheek!!! ;) Sh!t post for #4000 sis :) lol! Just realised!!! That serves me right for not being so sad that I have to count my posts!!!! :)

1996

Posts

EW EXPERT

Latest post on 08 March 2011 - 00:25

I thank the Lord that I don't have small children here to have to do parties and people taking the p*ss in thinking that I would be a babysitting service!!! I'm so grateful that I can just send my teenage DS with a booty bag (from the Milkman!) to a party of his choice and where he can sleep it off if need be!!! Tongue in cheek!!! ;) Well at least he would be easy to babysit while he is sleeping it off!

1579

Posts

EW EXPERT

Latest post on 08 March 2011 - 00:24

I thank the Lord that I don't have small children here to have to do parties and people taking the p*ss in thinking that I would be a babysitting service!!! I'm so grateful that I can just send my teenage DS with a booty bag (from the Milkman!) to a party of his choice and where he can sleep it off if need be!!! Tongue in cheek!!! ;) Sh!t post for #4000 sis :)

182

Posts

EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 08 March 2011 - 00:23

I thank the Lord that I don't have small children here to have to do parties and people taking the p*ss in thinking that I would be a babysitting service!!! I'm so grateful that I can just send my teenage DS with a booty bag (from the Milkman!) to a party of his choice and where he can sleep it off if need be!!! Tongue in cheek!!! ;)

1996

Posts

EW EXPERT

Latest post on 08 March 2011 - 00:23

I must be out of the loop! I am in the same loop as you wuffles and it is a long way from Mariana. At home I would spend the equivilant of 100 - 150aed per gift and wouldn't dream of offering cash or vouchers instead especially for a under 13 year old. Mine used to take the equivalent of about $10 in primary school and the equivalent of a CD price for secondary-guess it would be a bit more now but there are limits!

1579

Posts

EW EXPERT

Latest post on 08 March 2011 - 00:18

I must be out of the loop! I am in the same loop as you wuffles and it is a long way from Mariana. At home I would spend the equivilant of 100 - 150aed per gift and wouldn't dream of offering cash or vouchers instead especially for a under 13 year old.

277

Posts

EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 08 March 2011 - 00:15

just wondering...do the uninvited siblings bring separate gifts? I can't answer, as we never attend a party were one of my kids 5 and 3 1/2 been uninvited...We always attend together, as at this age, they don't have their own and only friends ! Usually our budget varies according to the relation we have with the child and the family As a scale is between 300 to 1000dhs.I will call in advance to ask what to buy as a gift or do they prefer the cash or the GV ,and we mention the budget . Mariana, doesn't your 5 year old get invitations to 'whole class parties' at school? (or your 3 1/2 year old if at nursery)? and there's another cultural difference; I would be fairly horrified if one of my friends offered cash/GV to a 5 year old, especially for that sort of money - but clearly not the case in all circles! We received few but we didn't attend.... We offer ''the gift'' to the parents as i said, prior with a chat with them and then act according to their wishes . I found it to be a more practical approach as the child may get something didn't need or something already has..or he is saving for theat special gift ... If i will receive a party invite ,where only one is invited, i will avoid as the kids emotional development at this age is very fragile and i wouldn't like to contribute to the jealousy and rivalry sentiments ,witch sibling's within very close age they battle already....

9

Posts

EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 08 March 2011 - 00:11

Very rude ! I have 2 kids and it will be impossible to attend with one...what i should do with the other? If you have a certain budget and not prepared to go over i suggest you limit the party to a close group of kids where you fallow up to make certain who attends .... You could always spend some QUALITY TIME together with the other ones :)

1403

Posts

EW OLDHAND

Latest post on 08 March 2011 - 00:09

Your party, your rules. edited by tally-ho on 07/03/2011 I think this sums it up brilliantly! If people have an issue with that then they shouldn't come. When our DD is of the age to start having birthday parties and after hearing what goes on with uninvited siblings turning up, I'll definitely be stating 'no siblings' on certain invites. You're throwing the party, its your kid, you decide how its organized and run.

1996

Posts

EW EXPERT

Latest post on 08 March 2011 - 00:00

just wondering...do the uninvited siblings bring separate gifts? I can't answer, as we never attend a party were one of my kids 5 and 3 1/2 been uninvited...We always attend together, as at this age, they don't have their own and only friends ! Usually our budget varies according to the relation we have with the child and the family As a scale is between 300 to 1000dhs.I will call in advance to ask what to buy as a gift or do they prefer the cash or the GV ,and we mention the budget . That is such a huge amount of money-wouldn't spend that on my own 20 something year old children! I must be out of the loop!

504

Posts

EW GURU

Latest post on 07 March 2011 - 23:56

Hi I am a wedding planner in Dubai and the no siblings issue is always a question I get!! Many parents enjoy the fact of having an excuse to get in a sitter or call on the mother in law so they can let there hair down We all love children but sometimes it good to go back to the basics Jodie No siblings or no children? do many parents have a mother in law in Dubai??

648

Posts

EW GURU

Latest post on 07 March 2011 - 23:55

You’re right Sandfly. Some cultures have the more the merrier attitude. I have been to loads of parties where guests turn up at any time that suits them. They think us westerners are weird for having set times and guest numbers.

504

Posts

EW GURU

Latest post on 07 March 2011 - 23:55

just wondering...do the uninvited siblings bring separate gifts? I can't answer, as we never attend a party were one of my kids 5 and 3 1/2 been uninvited...We always attend together, as at this age, they don't have their own and only friends ! Usually our budget varies according to the relation we have with the child and the family As a scale is between 300 to 1000dhs.I will call in advance to ask what to buy as a gift or do they prefer the cash or the GV ,and we mention the budget . Mariana, doesn't your 5 year old get invitations to 'whole class parties' at school? (or your 3 1/2 year old if at nursery)? and there's another cultural difference; I would be fairly horrified if one of my friends offered cash/GV to a 5 year old, especially for that sort of money - but clearly not the case in all circles!

504

Posts

EW GURU

Latest post on 07 March 2011 - 23:52

However if the 'bringing sibling' thing is very common here it is probably taken for granted in one or more of the prevailing cultures that an invitation is general rather than specific and not 'rude' to people in that culture - you can't read 'rudeness' across cultures in that way. Not to say that some people doing it aren't rude, but perhaps not fair to suggest that all are. I've found several nationalities assume siblings can attend so I don't think it's cultural - maybe a Dubai thing:-) Also if the invitation is addressed to a particular child I think the family is taking a liberty in assuming extends to others in the family. If they are in any doubt the polite thing to do would be to check. The polite thing in your, and my, culture. Not necessarily the case everywhere (thinking of more than one non Dubai, non-Western-culture, experience of 'party hospitality' among adults where it seemed to be a case of the more the merrier)

277

Posts

EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 07 March 2011 - 23:48

just wondering...do the uninvited siblings bring separate gifts? I can't answer, as we never attend a party were one of my kids 5 and 3 1/2 been uninvited...We always attend together, as at this age, they don't have their own and only friends ! Usually our budget varies according to the relation we have with the child and the family As a scale is between 300 to 1000dhs.I will call in advance to ask what to buy as a gift or do they prefer the cash or the GV ,and we mention the budget .

648

Posts

EW GURU

Latest post on 07 March 2011 - 23:45

One of my friends had a party one child’s mother turned up with a sibling ,DH and two other guests who were on holiday from the UK. As if this was not bad enough they ordered a bottle of Champaign and put it on my friends tab !!! To answer the op, no I don’t think its rude to write no siblings on the invitation. Your party, your rules. <em>edited by tally-ho on 07/03/2011</em>

682

Posts

EW GURU

Latest post on 07 March 2011 - 23:24

just wondering...do the uninvited siblings bring separate gifts?

708

Posts

EW GURU

Latest post on 07 March 2011 - 23:21

When we were kids, I remember my sister bringing back a few sweets for me from the birthday parties she went to, but I never thought of attending them with her. I mean, don't ppl have boundaries from an early age when it comes to their friends? I really can't imagine going to a birthday party of my older sibling's friend and playing around with the rest of her gang... so weird. Please tell me I'm not the only one. The movie ticket as an invite is a brilliant idea. :)

1

Posts

EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 07 March 2011 - 23:13

Hi I am a wedding planner in Dubai and the no siblings issue is always a question I get!! Many parents enjoy the fact of having an excuse to get in a sitter or call on the mother in law so they can let there hair down We all love children but sometimes it good to go back to the basics Jodie

1811

Posts

EW EXPERT

Latest post on 07 March 2011 - 23:02

However if the 'bringing sibling' thing is very common here it is probably taken for granted in one or more of the prevailing cultures that an invitation is general rather than specific and not 'rude' to people in that culture - you can't read 'rudeness' across cultures in that way. Not to say that some people doing it aren't rude, but perhaps not fair to suggest that all are. I've found several nationalities assume siblings can attend so I don't think it's cultural - maybe a Dubai thing:-) Also if the invitation is addressed to a particular child I think the family is taking a liberty in assuming extends to others in the family. If they are in any doubt the polite thing to do would be to check.

197

Posts

EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 07 March 2011 - 22:57

Child not necessarily OK even with that explanation (have had tantrums about why one or other child can't go to party with sibling) but part of life that child has to learn..... Hear hear Sandfly!

504

Posts

EW GURU

Latest post on 07 March 2011 - 22:56

It is not about the money but also teaching your child what is right. More like a 'trauma' for the mom like Mariana here, opppss...what do i do with the 2nd one! well... did you ask yourself that question when hvg that child in your belly? I bet you, if you tell the kid,what is the actual party for and who is it for, I can tell you the child will be OK. It is the parents that are the stroppy cow! Child not necessarily OK even with that explanation (have had tantrums about why one or other child can't go to party with sibling) but part of life that child has to learn.....

197

Posts

EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 07 March 2011 - 22:54

I wouldn't want to teach any child of mine to think it's the "norm" to be so rude as to not RSVP or not to take it on the chin if they're not invited to something (that's completely alien or inappropriate for them anyway) or not to understand the predicament for the host family and birthday child. So...absolutely 100% say "No siblings" I was at Jebel Ali Club a couple of years ago and a kids party arrived (nightmare!) and there were so many of them of all different ages - too much boisterousness and a lad got his nose broken. The poor Mum who was hosting looked at her wits end and it was obvious she had NO idea so many kids were coming - or that there would be so few adults. As someone else said, when they (and me) were kids you played a few games of pass the parcel / statues / musical chairs to maybe get a silly gift - and occasionally got a bit of cake in a napkin to take home. A child's birthday party is about the birthday child - not about the guests or giving Mum a chance to skive off for an afternoon.

504

Posts

EW GURU

Latest post on 07 March 2011 - 22:54

Just want to say, in case they are on EW, how grateful I have been to the couple of 'school' mums who have let DD attend parties aimed at DS's class - I have never ever assumed or taken this for granted; but have on occasion had to say that DS (4) was able to attend, but I wouldn't be able to stay with him and wasn't 100% sure how he would be about being left in an unfamiliar place - if people have parties on Fridays, I don't have childcare (and am a single mother) - when it was a paid facility, of course I offered to pay. Would never just 'bring' a sibling, but if the invitation said 'no siblings' and related to the sort of age where parents usually stay, DS (and I) may not be able to attend. However if the 'bringing sibling' thing is very common here it is probably taken for granted in one or more of the prevailing cultures that an invitation is general rather than specific and not 'rude' to people in that culture - you can't read 'rudeness' across cultures in that way. Not to say that some people doing it aren't rude, but perhaps not fair to suggest that all are.

277

Posts

EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 07 March 2011 - 22:53

It is not about the money but also teaching your child what is right. More like a 'trauma' for the mom like Mariana here, opppss...what do i do with the 2nd one! well... did you ask yourself that question when hvg that child in your belly? I bet you, if you tell the kid,what is the actual party for and who is it for, I can tell you the child will be OK. It is the parents that are the stroppy cow! ????? " I bet you " If you kept your mouth shout ,philosopher you will still be named <em>edited by Mariana on 07/03/2011</em>

500

Posts

EW GURU

Latest post on 07 March 2011 - 22:36

If you can't afford to cater to what's the norm here - maybe just maybe don't have a party. I would rather all kids who attend my kids party come in happy and not feeling bad for a sibling who really wanted to join. What a bizarre assumption, what makes you think this is the norm here in Dubai? If you don’t want siblings to show up just say so guilt free, of course no guarantee that they won’t. Hope ur LO has a fab birthday.

105

Posts

EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 07 March 2011 - 22:19

Personally, never had a problem with people bringing siblings, but then I came to Dubai! The first party I held (at home) was only days after my daughter started nursery. I had invited her whole class and waited for RSVP's but of course, very few came (alien to my culture). I had enough party bags for all of the children that had been invited and they were full of age appropriate things. Two hours into the party 5 of the invited children came (really couldn't believe it as not even an apology for lateness, again alien to me) and then one of the siblings who was 3 years older than my LO proceeded to snatch the Pinata stick, bash the Pinata to bits and load up her pockets with all the goodies-helped by her mother!!!! During the party games she pushed the wee ones out of the way, she told me my cake was **ap and I should have asked her mom to do it and then proceeded to take out every toy my LO owned and scattered them throughout the house! Before they left, her mom actually asked me if I had anything else to give her elder daughter as the party bags were a little young for her! I think it's perfectly acceptable to write "no siblings", just as I think it totally acceptable not to invite people because they have no b****y manners!

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