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Should men ALWAYS pick up the bill?

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3901

Posts

EW MASTER

Latest post on 10 January 2011 - 15:49

I do work - we are not married we are relatively in a newish relationship i agree that for the first date it's "gentlemanly" for the man to pay but surely once you're in a relationship it becomes more of a partnership...tbh if you both work i don't see any reason why you wouldn't expect to pay your way. I'd be interested to know how your partner feels about this...his answer (if he's honest lol) may surprise you...

248

Posts

EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 10 January 2011 - 15:48

hahahahahahaaha like I said I have offered in the past and he says no and quite frankly I can't be bothered to go through the whole "no It's on me, let me pay! Ok at least let's split it!" I just smile and he pays it's much simpler that way!

Freckles 128127

787

Posts

EW GURU

Latest post on 10 January 2011 - 15:41

I think you should definitely offer to pay as above anything else it is just common courtesy, but when he says no then **** girl enjoy it!!!!

5400

Posts

EW MASTER

Latest post on 10 January 2011 - 15:36

Jaq, in our case it's whoever's got the cash on them on the day, otherwise, we have an arrangement whereby what's his is mine and what's mine is mine. Works v well.. :) Unfortunately, for most of our marriage I haven't worked and it did take me a while to get used to not having money of my own, that I'd worked for. It would be bliss if I were to get a job of my own so that we could actually save something and stop worrying about bills at the end of the month, but it would be money for our family, not for me individually :)

521

Posts

EW GURU

Latest post on 10 January 2011 - 14:47

I would suggest if it bothers you then when out for a meal, excuse yourself to go the toilet and go and sneakily pay the bill. We have a friend does this when we are out together. :D

120

Posts

EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 10 January 2011 - 14:43

Am I the only married one here where it doesn't matter who pays for what, as it is all our money anyway - and comes out of the same account? When we first started dating, I often insisted on paying my way, or we would take turns in paying the bill. - DH says it was one of the things that attracted me to him. But after we got engaged, it went into one account for me to spend from:) - Much more convenient! <em>edited by jag on 10/01/2011</em>

829

Posts

EW GURU

Latest post on 10 January 2011 - 14:33

Then you should be paying your way through the dating phase. Gifts of 'luxury' goods that he doesn't really need do not a relationship make. You are spending time together to build your relationship and that is costing money. You should be shouldering your share. Not necessarily 50/50 if he earns a lot more than you but you should regularly have your hand in your pocket to contribute.

232

Posts

EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 10 January 2011 - 14:33

I'm with the posters who are wondering what decade/century we are living in. It brings me pleasure to treat my partner and I've been in relationships in the past where I've paid for most things if I had the most money at the time. It was always swings and roundabouts as there came a time when I had less money. I don't think a couple nneds to be religious about splitting everything absolutely evenly but I'd never want my man to always get the bills.

Girly girl30543

33

Posts

EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 10 January 2011 - 14:33

I do work - we are not married we are relatively in a newish relationship Well then yes I think you should say, come on let me get this one. Or at least treat him to some bits and pieces now and again. I believe men should be the main breadwinner. Whatever one may think; these are my thoughts and they serve me well BUT when your dating and working don't be a ponce....

248

Posts

EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 10 January 2011 - 14:31

I do work - we are not married we are relatively in a newish relationship

Girly girl30543

33

Posts

EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 10 January 2011 - 14:29

Surely if you don't work, then it doesn't matter who pays as it's all coming out the same pot anyway. LOL But if your both working then yes I think it is nice to pay occassionally and nice to suprise with the occassional little gift, new shirt, aftershave etc just a little thing.

248

Posts

EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 10 January 2011 - 14:19

EXACTLY!!! That's my point exactly! I always buy him gifts like a designer shirt n sunglasses and so on...

bowbellscowbell...

304

Posts

EW EXPLORER

Latest post on 10 January 2011 - 14:14

we've just got into the OUR money thing .. I was earning in the UK but I don't start work here until tomorrow .. so now his money is our money and my money is my own ... I always offer to pay - sometimes I get stung .. most times my DH will pay especially if were in company .. I enjoy paying sometimes - But most of the time I will surprise him with a shirt or some kind of clothing or pay the dry cleaning/ironing basket .. works both ways sometimes x

1579

Posts

EW EXPERT

Latest post on 10 January 2011 - 14:10

That makes me the woman... Hold on I just need to check my calendar..............................no it is definitely 2011 not 1956 :) abbyboot we are not aggressive we are perplexed

248

Posts

EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 10 January 2011 - 14:05

That makes me the woman...not sure why I am getting aggressive replies! It's my tradition - doesn't mean i agree with it which is why I am asking y'all!

1579

Posts

EW EXPERT

Latest post on 10 January 2011 - 14:01

but I have been accustomed that a man should pay the bill! I find it weird otherwise! It makes them feel like the man in the relationship! And what does that make you then? [i'>and I am not thinking lucky[/i'>

1236

Posts

EW OLDHAND

Latest post on 10 January 2011 - 13:56

I'm surprised that this is being discussed in this day and age unless things have gone full circle. My DH and I used to take turns paying for nights out, cinema back in the 70s!! Same today, sometimes he pays sometimes I do and it doesn't make him feel any less of a man!

829

Posts

EW GURU

Latest post on 10 January 2011 - 13:35

True, I hear all of you and I mean I do occasionally - randomly say he didn't have change and such then I don't mind but I have been accustomed that a man should pay the bill! I find it weird otherwise! It makes them feel like the man in the relationship! With respect abbyboot, what a load of old tosh. It takes a lot more than flashing the cash to be a man in a relationship.

248

Posts

EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 10 January 2011 - 13:33

True, I hear all of you and I mean I do occasionally - randomly say he didn't have change and such then I don't mind but I have been accustomed that a man should pay the bill! I find it weird otherwise! It makes them feel like the man in the relationship!

5499

Posts

EW MASTER

Latest post on 10 January 2011 - 13:20

Even if he says no, he might appreciate you at least offering.

149

Posts

EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 10 January 2011 - 13:20

No I don't think they should ALWAYS pay. Even if you earn a lot less than him - it's the gesture that counts and I'm sure most men would appreciate being ''treated'' sometimes.

103

Posts

EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 10 January 2011 - 13:17

I think it depends if you work and how much you earn relative to him. When I was out of work I always let DH pick up the bill, now I earn more than him I insist on taking it in turns to pay. And I tend to pick cheaper places when he's paying as I feel bad!

829

Posts

EW GURU

Latest post on 10 January 2011 - 13:12

Then don't even think about it. It doesn't sound like he'd get used to it and take advantage so it would be a really lovely gesture if you insisted every now and again that you pay. If you earn money then you should spend some of it on your dating.

248

Posts

EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 10 January 2011 - 13:10

But then he might get used to it lol I don't want that..

3220

Posts

EW MASTER

Latest post on 10 January 2011 - 13:09

Offer or take him somewhere specifying that you will be the one treating him.

1579

Posts

EW EXPERT

Latest post on 10 January 2011 - 13:06

In my opinion no they shouldn't.

248

Posts

EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 10 January 2011 - 13:06

Yes but I know that if I do he will say no - so why bother

829

Posts

EW GURU

Latest post on 10 January 2011 - 13:05

You should offer......

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