Irooni

Hi Irooni :) Since you asked I'll share, and try to be concise.
I struggled as a child and even as a teen, I was always going up and down with weight. McDonald's, pizza, Italian food, processed food was what my family all ate. My siblings are both string beans and metabolic wonders (to this day even!). My parents encouraged sports, which helped some. Yet I was a jockette who had cellulite. I got teased a lot. I weighed about 155 lbs at age 16 but it didn't look good :(

When I was about 21 I got quite big because I was an emotional eater. I was about 195 lbs then. I met someone who had done the Body for Life challenge, had success, and I decided to try it. In 3 months I whittled down to 145 lbs, which was an all time low. yay! I followed that method of eating and training for the next couple of years, and kept the lbs. off. One day, my SUV had a blowout and I went off the road and right into a tree. Although I only broke one bone I did not feel like going to the gym once I healed, and my eating habits were poor once again.

At 29 I was about 175 lbs of flab. I remember going on a blind date with a fitness guru (wish my friend had mentioned that!), and after I ordered at dinner, he asked me why I chose to eat junk, and did I always want to be the pretty fat girl? That stung. But it got my wheels turning. I remember going to Mexico for New Year's the next month, taking a picture with a donkey, and looking at the photo thinking--holy moses--I am as big as this donkey! So I did the New Year's thing, joined a gym, and slowly started eliminating bad things I ate. I knew how to eat, I just didn't want to give up my lifestyle even though I was miserable. I was motivated by the fitness competitors in the gym; they looked amazing.

One day a trainer told me I could do the same if I wanted. I was dubious. But I started training with those competitors the way they trained, eating what they ate, and within a year I got down to 140 lbs and on a stage myself at ge 31. I felt awesome but I'll be the first to say 4% body fat is a horrible look on me. Over the next 2 years I competed and excelled to the top tier of amateurs. I got sponsored by a supplement company and began working in the industry. I loved it, but it was a great deal of pressure to maintain a low body fat all the time. I was doing 2 hours of cardio a day and lifting weights. I was exhausted and most of the time--starving. I took supplements, too, a lot. Fat burners, the whole bit. All made by the company I worked for, and you can buy them at any nutrition store.

One day, I felt really ill. I went to the doctor and they ran some blood tests. Liver enzymes were so high (275!! 0-45 is normal) they ordered a biopsy. Also, I had massive amounts of gall stones, so they scheduled me for surgery to do both those things. I had been putting a little weight on, too, so my sponsorship got dropped. It turns out I had bridging fibrosis from taking oral supplements, and this affected my gall bladder, too. My liver would probably heal, but it was scarred badly.

2 months after surgery, I was a whopping 226 lbs. in January 2010. Why?? I was not able to even walk the treadmill, couldn't digest food well without my GB, and all that cardio and starvation nearly shut down my thyroid. Plus the surgery didn't go well, I wasn't healing. Another surgery fixed the issue (suture left inside me, thanks!). I was devastated because fitness was my life and livelihood.

I managed to get a job in a call center selling sports nutrition, because I could no longer be a spokesmodel. I decided, once healed, to suck it up and do crossfit. Which is h3llish training, but I wanted to shock my body and challenge myself. I managed to get to 194 in 6 weeks, but my eating was not spot on, which I knew. I was stoked that I got my endurance levels up and could even run! A first-ever. Finally I got fed up with busting my butt in the gym only to lose out because of my eating. I cleaned up my diet, and actually had to go vegan until my body adjusted to functioning without my GB. I slowly added meats and fats back in.

By August (8 months after weighing in at 226) I had gotten down to 160 and competed in one last show before moving here. It felt good to have myself back. But I still had years of "unlearning" to do. It is not necessary nor normal to do hours and hours of cardio. It is not necessary to go low carb, although it can be very effective. It is not necessary to take pills to lose weight. Contrary, it is quite dangerous. Being ultra lean is not exactly healthy, and even though those people look great in magazines, many of the competitors and models are headed for disaster and worse off, health wise, than those who are fat.

Fad diets do not work and you'll likely put more weight back on after. I have tried probably all of them, so I know. I also had to learn to love my body even when I wasn't my best. That was hard. It has taken a while, but I am finally able to process anything I eat, my liver is in great shape, and I'm sitting happily at about 15% body fat. I don't live in the gym, but I do love my morning runs and my weight sessions. I work out because I love it now, not because my job depends on it.

I am like everyone else. I love cupcakes, pizza, chinese food...ok pretty much everything that makes you fat. I like to drink beer. I even smoke when I do, although not the pack a day I used to, for almost 2 decades. So I am far from perfect. But I also love the way I feel and look when I am disciplined. So I choose to eat junk only once a week. I love healthy eating, too, and it is no struggle to do that on a daily basis.

Most women are interested in losing weight. But interest and desire doesn't get you there unless you do the work. Work is not just the gym; it is the other 23 hours of the day when you control what you eat. We can all control what we put in our mouths even if we can't all run a 5K. People say "oh, it's so hard!" Of course it is not easy--but it IS simple. Most people know what to do but choose not to. It is human nature to think about what you are giving up but not about what you will gain. I hear this all the time: I want to lose weight, look good, etc, but I don't want to give up X, I don't want to do Y, and I simply cannot live without Z. Well, then you're wrong. You do not want it badly enough. Which is fine--just don't kid yourself.

OK off my soapbox. :) I hope this post explains why I say the things I do on this forum, and why I advocate certain things and admonish others. I left a lot out, but hopefully you get the gist. x

ETA: I just had to add that I ran into that goofy fitness guru 3 years after our horrid blind date, and it felt so good when he told me I looked great, to which I responded he was still a total d!ck
<em>edited by Beebers on 07/01/2013</em>