ADHD advice please!

Hi Ladies Could someone please recommend a psychologist for get my DS assessed? Though I find all the symptoms similar, I would like to get an formal assessment done to rule out any issues. Regards Oshuma

My DS has ADHD and he's also academically gifted with a very high IQ. Often ADHD kids are like this. He was diagnosed when he was six years old and started medication at eight years of age. We tried occupational therapy, physiotherapy, diet change, listening programmes, brain training, etc. I really didn't want to put him on medication and I had this fear that it would turn him into a zombie. What changed was when the school told us that 50% of every teacher's time was being taken up by him and it wasn't fair on the other students. He takes a medication called Concerta which is like a new generation of ADHD meds, similar to a slow release form of ritalin. It lasts for 12 hours, so from 7am-7pm. Within a few days we saw a major improvement in his behaviour and he said that for the first time ever he could concentrate and didn't have the "noise" in his head. It was at this point that I felt guilty for not putting him on medication sooner. What I have learned is that for children that have ADHD medication truly helps them function. Medication needs to be given as part of an overall programme, so my son also has regular learning support sessions at school to help him with things like social skills and organisation. ADHD kids often suffer on the social side. Their ADHD prevents them from learning how to socialise with other children at a young age. So when my son was on Concerta he finally saw the effect of his behaviour on other children. For the first couple of weeks we had him coming home from school in tears because he wasn't in the ADHD fog and all of a sudden became aware of how other children viewed him and didn't want to play with him. I talk to my son about his medication and how he feels on it and he feels that it helps him focus and do well at school. Over the past few years he's gone through workshops and therapies to help him gain those social skills that he missed when he wasn't on medication. As he's growing up, it's getting easier, but you do need to adjust their medication sometimes. Every child is different and different treatments work for different children, but you don't need to be worried about your kid turning into a zombie, especially if he truly has ADHD. However I have learned that finding a good specialist helps. Initially we saw our pediatrician but we found that a psychiatrist was better equipped to help and evaluate the best types of medication and therapy. I initially thought that the idea of a psychiatrist was a bit scary but he's actually lovely and is much better at relating to my DS than the pediatrician was. There's also an ADHD support group in Dubai and the woman who runs it has a list of specialists and she has regular meetings. You'll find that lots of people who don't have ADHD kids will try to give you "advice", but the only person who knows your child is you and you know what's best for him. I still sometimes get comments from people about "helpful suggestions" like how can you put him on medication - you should just change his diet. In the end you know best and what will be best for your DS. Good luck.

Thanks so much for taking the time to reply DesertRose1958. Much appreciated. Perky piglet. For me the question 'does your child have special needs' has been a very difficult one to answer & to be honest I still don't know! On the one hand I think he may well just be a 'normal' 6 year old boy on a different developmental curve to some of his peers with some of his perceived difficulties being exacerbated by the very academic environment that he is in. On the other hand I sometimes think that his behaviors & abilities go beyond quirky. However, that is often the nature of such difficulties - that they appear inconsistently. Within weeks of starting reception my son's teacher had some concerns about him but we didn't investigate formally until the following academic year owing to his age. He's now had two OT assessments & a full Ed psych report. Unusually he presents with marked strengths & weaknesses in both verbal & non verbal intelligence tests (normally there is one area that shows particular strength & the other area is correspondingly weaker). He has excellent perceptual skills (block design) but finds it very hard to make logical connections. He has well developed motor skills when moving but has issues with handwriting & is almost totally unable to maintain an upright/alert posture for academic work. Quite confusing & certainly no one has been able to make a 'diagnosis' - dyspraxia was mentioned but subsequently ruled out & he has none of the classic co-ordination issues. He is a great reader & has well developed comprehension skills at the same level but struggles with almost everything else (particularly Maths) & can be accidentally disruptive in class because he is so unable to stay on task or work well independently. I would suggest that you go ahead with an assessment but perhaps think about organising one independently. In retrospect I feel I shared too much with the school. We are lucky that he has a fantastic class teacher & head of his key stage but the SENCO is very negative & bullish about how we should manage him. To begin with we had OT sessions at the school (that we paid for) but she became overly involved & the feedback was going to her so we now have his sessions outside. Whilst you know your child better than anyone else his school see him in an environment that demands behaviors that aren't always required at home. There will likely be a considerable cost but it will either give you peace of mind or more specific information that can only help your child. Personally speaking the results of my son's assessment were a revelation & really helped me to understand him. Being seen to co operate with the school can't be a bad thing either. Hope this helps.

Can I jump in to ask, when do you know that your child has special needs? I have just been told that my son is being assessed by the special ed guy, but I don't think he is anything other than a slightly naughty boy and believe me when I say I do not look at him through rose tinted specs. Any advice?

I can only go on my experience so not sure about the anecdotal evidence, but deciding on medication is no easy decision. The cost was no more than I would pay for tutoring also. Finally we saw two doctors before medication and I have to say both Dr Amer and the other one from Lighthouse (can't remember her name), both suggested brain training before medication. I think you are very right, it is vital to do your due diligence and find the right solution for you and your circumstances.

I looked into B&L for DS but decided against it on the basis of cost (it's hugely expensive!) & the considerable time commitment. Anecdotally I've heard very mixed reviews about the results. Also I know one of the tutors & whilst she's a fantastic lady, she has no relevant qualifications & was trained in only a few weeks. That surprised me. If money was no object I think I would try it though. DR1958 I was interested in your link. Do you know if anything like that exists in Dubai? I have been recommended Dr Grim (?!) at the Fairmont hotel. Any reviews? I think you sum things up pretty well. The lady I did a workshop with was pretty crapola at what she did also. I didn't ever go back to her, not even for the next workshop but I did get hold of the materials myself and have a go at doing it with my boy, as well as one of my daughters just for the sake of it. She was doing her IB at the time and it was just a bit of fun. My granddaughter does it with the lady doing her Davis method and its been fab for her , no more falling over wet woodbines, but that said I firmly believe its also down to the other things we have in place for her as well. Re Ian. There is no one in this region doing what he does, and pls understand that what he does is different to an Irlen lense. He will travel and last year I was going to bring him to the region and just divide the cost between parents, Ive done it before with our specilists and it works out really well. Its the overall cost divided between how many people he sees, no profit involved, apart from a donation to see that one child from a less fortunate background gets to see the person as well. Its not a big donation, just the equivalent of a few hundred dirhams. Anyway it was brought to me attention that a family from here were checking up on how much it would cost to get him here etc as they obviously thought I was going to be trying to make money from it. They wanted to check that what ever I suggested price wise - it was the price. Well either that or they thought oh we'll let her get them as far as oman at their expense then we'll ask him to nip up to Dubai for the day and cut out some of the cost for us. It was quite disgraceful behavior so I just said to him - we are coming to you. It was no skin off our nose but it was a shame for others who missed the chance to see him. And lets face it, even if a person brought him or any other specialist to see their child, it would only ever cost the same amount as a one parent and a child going to see the specialist abroad, and its much less hassle. Anyway, all it involved was getting to Ayr, which is very close to Glasgow, having a good nights sleep, seeing him the next day, then getting on the plane the next. We did allow for another day though just in case he wanted to do some fine tuning - but he didn't. The consultation only costs a couple of hundred pounds and the glasses not much more. I think I was about 800 for the consult and 3 pairs of glasses. The fact its so reasonable is another reason why it can be a good idea to get him here to see others - the ticket money can be a lot compared to the price of the intervention. Its not usually the case. These kind of things are usually arm and leg jobbies. I first came aross Ian on an autism forum about 10 years ago and tried to get one of my older children to see him, he's a bigger version of my granddaughter, but he said no and as he was a young man at the time I thought ok, its up to you. When it became clear my granddaughter had her quirky bits I thought to myself - aha, its Ian Jordan for you, little one. The difference in her is amazing, yes its helped her reading, a lot, but its the change they have made to her sensory issues that I find most satisfying. For example there was a kind of hall in school where the kids would congregate and it drove her potty to the extent she would get out of school and my daughter would know as soon as she picked her up if she'd had to spend time in the room - she would be on total sensory overload and all **** would break loose as soon as she got in the car. Anyway one day she was saying something about oh today we were in the hall and it was funny, and my daughter said you were in the hall, and she said yes, I can go in there now if I wear my glasses, they help with my 'hearing', I don't get stressed and angry anymore when Im in there. It was a revelation and from her mouth alone. She had absolutely no idea at all as to what the glasses were supposed to be doing for her sensory wise, she just went there one day and listened to what her brain and body were saying to her and that was - put your glasses on. I can usually smell a woowoo treatment from a mile off - there is nothing woowoo about Ian. He lets parents do the testing using various coloured lenses as well, and its amazing what the different colour can even do to the taste of the sweets he gives you to chew as part of the testing. hth :) edited by DesertRose1958 on 02/02/2014 <em>edited by DesertRose1958 on 02/02/2014</em>

I looked into B&L for DS but decided against it on the basis of cost (it's hugely expensive!) & the considerable time commitment. Anecdotally I've heard very mixed reviews about the results. Also I know one of the tutors & whilst she's a fantastic lady, she has no relevant qualifications & was trained in only a few weeks. That surprised me. If money was no object I think I would try it though. DR1958 I was interested in your link. Do you know if anything like that exists in Dubai? I have been recommended Dr Grim (?!) at the Fairmont hotel. Any reviews?

Having also done brain training at The Brain & Learning for both children (started with one with focus concentration issues and got such fantastic results that we decided to enrol the other too), I certainly think that it is a great idea to try it first. In fact a really great friend of mine who has his branding company (one of the most respected in Dubai) suspected he had ADHD too after his son was diagnosed. He did the program with his son and he says that the whole thing has been life changing not just for the two of them but for the whole family. He keeps saying I wish I had done this when I was a boy! No point dwelling, but I think it is a great opportunity when things like this are available to us nowadays.

We also used brain training with my son, albeit a modified version that took his abilities into account. It did nothing for him but his difficulties are extreme and go way beyond his autism and Tourettes. But on the other hand it has been of great help to my granddaughter, she doesn't have ADHD but she is dyslexic, has auditory processing disorder, sensory issues, and more than likely dyspraxia. She has gone from being a wee girl who would trip over fresh air, and fall going upstairs for eg, to being able to walk upstairs like a wee model. She is just so graceful and elegant. She has never at any stage in her life been quirky enough for medication to have even been mentioned let alone have to be considered, but if it had I would have encouraged it because for some children no amount of non medical interventions are enough. We haven't just done brain training with her, we also do sensory stuff and she wears glasses with a blue lense that were prescribed by http://www.jordanseyes.com/ . She is also doing the Davis method for her dyslexia. There's really good parenting going on as well and my granddaughter is now a happy wee girl who is doing really well at school academically and socially. You just have to try things but you don't have to try them on their own for ever, as a mum you will know whats best for your child and if your instinct is telling you he needs medication then listen to it. <em>edited by DesertRose1958 on 01/02/2014</em>

As a mother of a son with Dyslexia and ADHD (who is very bright by the way) and a school Educational Psychologist, I agree wit Valt too. We did brain training with my soon over 2 years ago now and did not want to try the medication path first. Do contact them and do the assessment and find out for yourself if this is the right path for your son! I recommend brain training and The Brain & Learning first to any one who is considering medication. YOu may still go down that path but you would have considered other possible ways forward. Medication only deals with symptoms, brain training permanently rewires the brain and addresses the root causes of ADHD (executive function problems & low grey matter density in the prefrontal cortex)! Good Luck!!!!

Before you decide on Medication, I would certainly try brain training. We were at a very similar crossroads 2.5 years ago. THe Ed Psych recommended The brain & Learning (04-4534170) for a program of brain training and we have not looked back since! No medication needed post training (although I do know that this is not always the case). Pooneh the Director also gave us tons of research and helped us make an informed decision!

Hi ladies, my DS is 10 and he shows so many signs of having ADHD but my DH refuses to believe it. I am about at my wits end with trying to help him study for school work etc..... It is becoming a dreaded daily task trying to keep him focused! I want to have him tested but DH does not want to. Can you recommend a good paediatrician I could atleast start with? Maybe if a Paediatrician recommends to my DH that DS needs to be tested, he would be more willing to listen. I didn't go in to details about what DS is struggling with, but would like to know what you guys experience with your ADHD kids to make sure I am on the right track.

Hi, my son has ADHD although these days it is hardly noticeable. He is 15. Around 9/10 years was his worst time and medication plus a consistent routine saved us. The other thing was diet. ADHD children often suffer food intolerances which trigger certain behaviors. Please google Sue Dengate for food intolerance network about what foods to avoid. I love my son and i wouldn't change him for the world but life has been challenging.

I have a son who's food issues stemmed for Classic Kanners Autism. It was an absolute ****** nightmare, and it was only after starting medication for some of his problems that he started to eat. And I really do mean he did not eat, for eg he lived on toast with butter cut into squares and toasted for a certain amount of minutes for about a year. I could go on and on and on but I wont for the simple reason I cant - my chest closes in terror at the memory of it all. Anyway just why the children with ASD wont eat or cant eat really isn't known for sure but there is very clear evidence to suggest sensory issues are at play along with the need for sameness to ensure a feeling of security and well being. Could it be along the same lines with ADHD? I honestly don't know what would have happened if my son hadn't started on some very serious medications but such is the change in him I can only say I wish I hadn't waited so many months before finally agreeing to him having them. It was a misguided thing to do borne of the best of intentions. As for what people think? You will manage in time how to handle opinions but for now just remember they are like backsides - everyone has one. There is a book called Cant Eat Wont Eat and whilst it stems from the viewpoint of those on the spectrum I think its ideal for anyone who has a child where sensory issues may come into play, and I believer they can with ADHD. It wont get your son to eat but after reading the personal accounts of those who 'cant or wont eat', as well as those of their mum etc, you will be left with a feeling of all round relief and things may just seem a little bit better. I hope some of this has helped. :)