Natural Childbirth Advice ..... | ExpatWoman.com
 

Natural Childbirth Advice .....

92
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EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 29 June 2011 - 18:03

Dear All,

I have been researching labor and childbirth and I do believe that some women get through it all without feeling a huge amount of pain and others do feel a massive pain but are able to cope with it without an epidural ..... I am prepared for the agony and whatever will happen but I'm trying to plan to get through it all without an epidural as the needle and tube is worrying me and the thought of loosing feeling in your lower half of body and maybe needing a catheter and so on.

For all those women who have gone through childbirth and not had an epidural, was it because you were able to cope with the pain because you had prepared somehow eg. Certain positions, breathing, water, gas and air, meditation ..... Or was it because you had decided not to have an epidural no matter how bad it got and it was unbearable but you still carried on without any medication?

I just want to be as prepared as possible and understand why some women are able to get through it without epidurals and others say you HAVE to have one to get through it and whether there is something I can do in advance to help my chances of being able to cope.

This is my first pregnancy and fortunately I haven't experienced much physical pain in my life Ie. Health complications, broken bones or anything to compare it to so I don't know how to mentally prepare. And I am a total wimp and I find internal checks down below uncomfortable so not sure how I can get through this ......

Any help or words of wisdom or things that actually worked for you to relieve the pain would be much appreciated. Basically, I'm trying to figure out whether the women who do it naturally still feel all the same discomfort and pain as everyone else but they are just much stronger physically and mentally or whether these women have actually done something or found a way to make the pain bearable which is why they manage to get through it without medicate .

Sorry for the confusing post and hope it makes sense .....

59
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EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 30 June 2011 - 18:22
I agree don't be forced into a birth plan. I did have one but it was as simple as pain relief as required. I really wanted to do it without any meds at all and I am very happy to say I managed it. I had a water birth but didn't want to get in the pool until I was 7cm as I was worried it would slow me down. I had it in my head that gravity pulls so walking for as long as possible would get me through it as quickly as possible. I also found that because my thought process appeared to be right as I was progressing very quickly it helped me remain possitive about dealing with the pain. Oh course it is painful but I really didn't find it as bad as I had prepared for. I was very lucky that I managed to stay mobile until I was ready to go in the pool and was holding my baby 4 hours after getting to hospital. Remain open minded as you can't plan for the unknown. Nothing wrong with having an idea of how you want it to go but it is important to remember it's not always possible. Good luck!!
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EW GURU
Latest post on 30 June 2011 - 16:28
I agree with everyone that says don't be so focused on a birth plan. Most times those get thrown out the window. The more calm you are the better it is for the baby. Best advice is to know what your doctor will do. Meaning how long will she make you wait after your due date, how long will she keep you in labour before looking at other options (I mention this because some don't let you stay in labour as long as others), and how supportive is she of what you want.
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EW EXPERT
Latest post on 30 June 2011 - 16:06
I absolutely agree with H.A.K - don't get yourself so worked up about a birth plan that anything less than exactly what's on the paper is a huge disappointment. I read Ina May and convinced myself my son's birth was going to be 100 per cent Ina May style. It couldn't have been further from Ina May style if I'd tried (well, maybe if I'd gone for an elective C) and I felt let down, disappointed in myself and maybe even traumatised. Be open to whatever needs to happen on the day and as H.A.K says, remember the goal. Getting your baby out safely, end of.
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EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 29 June 2011 - 21:56
I'm also reading Ina May Gaskins Guide to Childbirth after reading so many good reviews about it. Some of it is a bit hippy-ish (such as she doesn't agree with Ultrasounds) however there's loads of info about labour and how to relax. I'm pretty open minded about getting an epidural however after reading nutty's thread about the issues her friend had with a hospital out here I'm terrified!
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EW EXPERT
Latest post on 29 June 2011 - 20:52
I think I realise that no matter what preparation you do ....... if you have a low tolerance for pain then you're going to need an epidural unless you can mentally train your mind to believe that it is not pain but some other process taking place. edited by Natashak on 29/06/2011 Not really. It hurts a lot.. but it isnt so bad that u cant bear it. Believe me, when i say zero or minus pain tolerance for me.. and if I can pop without an epidural, anyone can! Read up a lot.. it really does help. Get a doula if u can.. lifesaving women I tell u! :) Good luck with your delivery :) I actually don't think that normal trauma-pain tolerance has anything much to do with it, mainly because the sensations involved are so very different (and not something you can compare), but also because everyone is just so different. I couldn't say what my "pain threshold" is... certainly breaking my ankle was far more painful than giving birth to 3.9kg of baby! Really try to get your head around the not-trauma-pain thing, because it's true. In between contractions, you won't feel a thing (I was pretty much having a good old chat and then going silent through a contraction, gritting my teeth and concentrating and then once it was over, resuming where I'd left off...) and then literally ALL the "pain" goes away the moment your baby is born. It's so very strange, because seconds before, you feel like your body is trying to turn itself inside out (my experience, at least) and then hop! All done. Huge relief. Beaming grin! Also, I was just thinking about this... birth plans. So many people I know have had less than perfect birth experiences because their labour and delivery "didn't go to plan" and have had subsequent regrets, guilt, and other nasty things. Cut back to basics. The Plan is to get the baby out safely and preferably as easily as possible. That's it really. All the rest is just detail and preferences. Don't get het up about any of the details - just make your preferences clear and be informed about how you may have to change them in x, y or z scenario. Be at peace with it - it's not rocket science. If you're constipated, you don't make a big Plan for it, do you - you may take some pills if you feel the need (or may knock back the prune juice instead... or not), take a selection of books or magazines, choose your spot and resign yourself to the task in hand - it's going to happen one way or another! ;)
587
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EW GURU
Latest post on 29 June 2011 - 20:45
Two kids, two induced labours, with TENS machine and gas. The TENS machine was a great distraction. I didn't want to be bedridden with an epidural but apparently you can getting 'walking' ones. I'm not sure why I wanted to be a hero without an epidural:) Sibling rivalry! Although it was great to be up and about after the birth.
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EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 29 June 2011 - 20:44
I also heard that doula's can do wonders for you and give you that personal attention that you need. I gave birth at home in Canada, I didn't exactly have a nurse helping me out or guiding me through my labour and I so wished I had a doula at the time. I would even go so far as to say: perhaps a doula could have helped me avoid my c-section. Good luck with your delivery hun and do let us know how it went!
429
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EW EXPLORER
Latest post on 29 June 2011 - 20:29
I think I realise that no matter what preparation you do ....... if you have a low tolerance for pain then you're going to need an epidural unless you can mentally train your mind to believe that it is not pain but some other process taking place. edited by Natashak on 29/06/2011 Not really. It hurts a lot.. but it isnt so bad that u cant bear it. Believe me, when i say zero or minus pain tolerance for me.. and if I can pop without an epidural, anyone can! Read up a lot.. it really does help. Get a doula if u can.. lifesaving women I tell u! :) Good luck with your delivery :)
92
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EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 29 June 2011 - 20:24
Thank you soooooooooooooooo much for your replies ladies ......... this is exactly the type of answers and info I was looking for. Shaf - thanks for the book recommendation - I will definitely go buy it and read up on the roaring like a lion technique ;) Hello Again Kitty - I have looked into hypnobirthing and think it is something I will look into when I return back to the UK. I think I realise that no matter what preparation you do ....... if you have a low tolerance for pain then you're going to need an epidural unless you can mentally train your mind to believe that it is not pain but some other process taking place. Well I'll certainly keep you all posted ... I still have 3 months to go so I'll try to prepare as best to possible. And please keep your stories coming ...... there is nothing more helpful than actual first hand experiences and advice rather than some generic information. Thanks again xxxxxxxxxxxxx <em>edited by Natashak on 29/06/2011</em>
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EW EXPLORER
Latest post on 29 June 2011 - 20:11
i have zero pain tolerance.. 2 kids but i still wince when i have a blood test done... my first labor was 24hrs.. at 18hrs i had an epidural. The mistake I did was to lie down in bed at 17hrs.. once u lie down, the pain is simply too much to cope. Plus I had awful awful stitches after he popped. Second time round, I was most scared abt the stitches more than anything. But I was much better prepared. I highly recommend Ina May Gaskin's "guide to childbirth". Thanks to that book, I have a 2hr labor and delivery. I dint expect to dilate in 2hrs.. i definitely dint expect t be pushing out a baby the minute i reached the labor room. 20mins of pushing and she was in my hands. :) Plus 20mins after her delivery i was standing in the shower without help. No stiches also. 1 - I labored and delivered on hands and knees.. and this is by far the best position to deliver a baby. If u read it up, u will find that when u r on your hands and knees your opening is at its largest. Yea, even i couldnt comprehend popping out a baby on my hands and knees, but it worked and i have a totally intact perinium! 2 - Apparently the vagina and the mouth are interconnected. So each time I had a contraction I would open my mouth like i was roaring. And i kept telling myself that there would be space for 2 babies to walk out. :) 3 - I had Dr. Elsa, City hospital who guided my birth so that I wouldnt tear. She told me when to hold, when to push. I am not saying its easy.. pushing out a baby is like having the biggest poop of your life. But i had no time for pain relief.. i dint want pain relief, but i was screaming for an epidural when i reached the hospital :D I honestly cannot imagine a delivery in any other way than hands and knees now. And yea, my baby was over 3kg.. so not exactly light!
1861
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EW EXPERT
Latest post on 29 June 2011 - 20:03
I've got 2 and both were natural, no epidural and the second was actually just on paracetamol! I'm not some nutty Earth-Mother or chanting hippy, but please believe me when I say that I think the secret is to understand that the pain isn't trauma-pain (like the pain you get if the burn yourself or break a leg) but it's exercise-pain (like the "pain" you get from a really hard work-out). There's absolutely no reason to fear it... in fact, the key is not to fear it, but to go with it - understand that your body is trying to do something, understand how it wants to do it and above all LET IT GET ON WITH IT without letting your mind get in the way. I've never run a marathon, but I think that it almost comes close - the physical exertion, yourself willing your body on, the awareness of your muscles and the end goal and then finally the euphoria of getting there. I can hardly put in words how I felt giving birth to my second, but it was amazing... just the heightened awareness, the focus and the euphoria... almost a bit of an epiphany. Read about Hypnobirthing too. Some bits are a bit "out-there", but in essence it's about changing your mindset from one that is focussing on negativity ("agony", "preparing for the worst", "pain", "if I can't stand it any longer", etc...) to one where to become in control of the process and through that, you lose your fear of it (because all the negativity has actually made us dread childbirth to varying degrees). You retrain your brain to think of childbirth as just another bodily function, that it actually knows what to do and basically that you can do it. Be prepared for different scenarios too. There's no "worst case" as a birthing process because they all end up with you giving birth. Water birth? All-fours? On your back on the bed? Whatever works best for you - it doesn't matter what your mum/ sister/ friend/ random forum bod did or what your Ob/Gyn is more comfortable with - they're not the ones pushing your baby out, so it's up to you. Epidural? Yes, if [i'>you[/i'> choose that it's the right thing for [i'>you[/i'> at that time. C-section? Yes, if that's what is needed. There's no failure. There are no medals for x, y or z because it's not a competition - it's all about [i'>you[/i'> and you alone.
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EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 29 June 2011 - 19:50
I had a completely natural birth. I had contractions for 37 hours quite close from the beginning but really strong after 12 hours. After 37 hours i had only dialated 3cm and this was when my waters broke so was advised to go into the hospital. Got there 20 mins later and was 4cm, while checking if i could have a water birth the contractions got bad and i wanted to push, the midwife checked and i had gone from 4cm to fully dialated in 5 mins!!!!!! Bottom line was i had no choice but to have a natural birth now but i had planned this all along. I would look into a water birth as it is suppose to help with the paid - I wish would have loved one and hope on my next I can. The contractions were worse for me than the pushing part ( was out in 20 mins). All the best with whatever you decide.
168
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EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 29 June 2011 - 19:50
nightmare isnt it, i was the original earth mummy! NOT.......i wanted no pain relief, squatting, unassisted birth etc.....but like you no pain threshold at all, in reality i got to 4 cm, on oxytocin, had the epidural, catheter etc, 2 hours later dd was out. Its a minefield try and listen to your body, but hey in this day and age, would you remove your teeth without pain relief, go for an operation without help, if you need some, take it. now pregnant with 2nd and if needs be, will have the epidural again, it has its pros and cons.......have a birth plan in place, but mother nature will do what is has to do........listen to your doctor, and body, you will get through it, i also had a doula which was a great support for me and hubby, as no family here. good luck x
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EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 29 June 2011 - 19:16
Cleo4e - That's exactly what I am thinking!! Because of all the reading I have done I now have the belief that squatting and walking and rotating the pelvis and breathing and showers etc etc etc is all it takes to make childbirth an easier process ..... and I am trying to understand the reality as to whether it all helps but does not diminish the pain or are these the techniques that women use to get through without an epidural. I absolutely have an open mind and am ready for anything and definitely preparing for the worst .... I am planning a Water Birth in my local hospital in UK but that is because after watching water birth videos I now also believe that the water actually gives some meaningful pain relief and again I am confused as to whether that is true or whether it just relaxes you. Soooo confused!!! :\:
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EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 29 June 2011 - 18:54
I would also say to have an open mind. I was very much like you when I delivered my 1st 4 months ago. I was dead set on having a completely natural birth. I had beautiful images of my labour starting at home..and me swaying and opening my hips on a big pilates ball and then getting to the hospital when i was about to pop and having a quick and easy delivery while squatting. hahaha Boy- was in for a surprise!! Not only was I induced a week before I was due, but had a 24 hour labour and did get an epidural when I just couldn't take it, and ended up having a painful c-section which to this day is still a little sore at the incision site. All I can say is, you may want what you want but nature may have other plans in store for you, so be open to what may or may not happen and go with it. If you need the epidural- do it, sometimes, not getting the epidural and not being 'relaxed' enough may even delay your labour- so listen to your body and at the end of the day what really counts is that you have a happy healthy baby to love.
Anonymous (not verified)
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EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 29 June 2011 - 18:50
I didn't have any meds or an epidural, I didn't want an epidural because of the greater chance of it prolonging the labour and needing intervention. I don't like needles but the thought of the needle in my back didn't worry me. I read a book called Birth Skills by Juju Sundin and also got DH to read some sections and this helped, he surprised me by remembering quite a lot of the advice and was very good at distracting me. Most of all, I was not scared... there is a very strong pain/fear/panic cycle, don't be scared of the pain, it's a good pain, it's not because you're sick and (even if it might feel like it) it doesn't last forever. My labour was 9 hours from first "ooh was that a contraction??!" to holding baby. I walked around, went in the bath, crouched by the bed, was on all fours.. midwives kept telling me to get on the bed and I asked them "why? I'm not going to sleep" and generally annoyed them by doing what I wanted to do, they repeatedly asked me if I wanted an epidural and wouldn't believe that I didn't want one. Also I think it helps to remain active throughout your pregnancy, I was swimming 4x a week despite sciatica and went for lots of walks, if I couldn't get out I would walk up and down the stairs for 20 mins morning and afternoon, much to the amusement of building security. Does your Ob support normal delivery? I was with Dr Elsa at City and she asked me once what I wanted, I told her I wanted a hands off delivery with minimal intervention and that's what I got... she jokingly requested that I get to hospital before I needed to push once she realised how serious I was about the hands off part!
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EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 29 June 2011 - 18:33
Hi there I have had two children and both were natural delivery without epidural but with pethadine. I (like you) did not want to have an epidural as didn't like the whole idea of the needle and not feeling my legs and when i spoke to my dr she advised me to have an open mind rather than decide i def wanted it or didn't but rather be open to it if I was in a lot of pain and really felt i needed it. I mentally prepared myself by expecting a lot of pain but kind of expecting it is just something I have to go through and knowing it would be over. I think this helped but i also had fairly quick labour and deliverires. My advice would be to just be open to whatever you feel your body needs at the time, i think this will relieve the pressure. I also have friends who had an epidural and they said it was fine, they still felt they could feel their legs and had control. Good luck1 <em>edited by natashab on 29/06/2011</em>
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EW EXPLORER
Latest post on 29 June 2011 - 18:30
Try a Tens Machine, it worked for me - I have done one c/s, one water birth(no pain relief at all besides rescue drops), one epidural birth and one vacuum extraction. Best one was water birth. I have a brand new tens machine for sale if you like, my username at gmail dot com. (sorry so abrupt, have to take kids out) Sure you'll get great advice here. Sending hugs - read a lot of good books and trust your body, you'll do fine. Also meet the hospital staff before - a woman needs to feel safe in order to have a good experience, choose a hospital that makes you feel that way. xx :)
 
 

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