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Pregnant - not married

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25

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EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 08 March 2011 - 16:20

It seems obvious but don't see it mentioned - why not call your respective consulates to ask if they can list what is available here to get married quickly for you 2 ( if you decide that). Las Vagas seems a long way to go for a quick wedding! Just a thought - can you give birth here without any problems if the 9 months overlaps the marriage date?! I've heard some hospitals here ask to see the marriage cert. when babies are born. Good luck! Looked at Las Vegas even just to have it done quick. You can give birth without issues if less than 9 months, its been discussed before and I have just gone over due - so if we sort it out soon enough, it shouldn't be that bad.

25

Posts

EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 08 March 2011 - 16:17

If I was in such a dilemma I would find the quickest and easiest solution and get the job done!!!!!!!!! and not be on a forum wasting precious time. edited by salsB on 08/03/2011 SalsB you had to make sure there's a rude poster here is it?? Not answerable to you but - I got good ideas here. Am in the office, so can't run around! DH is working on the Christ Church Jebel Ali option at the moment. Got a meeting with closest couple of friends tonight to work on this. Surely not wasting time, found out yest afternoon - what else do you want me to do?!? PS - Thanks AriVW edited by Chocoa on 08/03/2011 Im not a rude poster, im saying as it is!!!!!!!! ring your embassy and ask them the quickest way, bare in mind a live forum may not always know the correct answer to your questions anyway. Visited and rang embassies first thing and they could only advise their procedure, looking here for other options. Remember we are diff nationalities! You'll know if you read the full post. This was done early today and all time frames worked out, mentioned below Am Christian and OH is Christian. Someone asked if I could marry in Shariah court and I said DH will have to be a muslim then. Custody of my kids - that's a long story and I am aware of the full legal situation and in close contact with my lawyer on current situation. edited to remove personal information <em>edited by Chocoa on 09/03/2011</em>

1257

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EW OLDHAND

Latest post on 08 March 2011 - 16:03

Why did you not use any contraception? You really need to ask yourself that. While the ins and outs of the OP's contraception methods haven't been discussed in detail, I believe she stressed that they were 'very careful' [and that her OH wasn't, er, contributing much to the transaction if you know what I mean!'> but despite that, I think that this question comes a bit late. And is a bit needless at this stage! In order to be pregnant her OH must have contributed and careful is proven time and time again to not work! LOL I was actually asking from the psychological aspect, because i don't believe women of a certain age and situation just get pregnant my mistake, which is why i was asking her to look deeper into how and why it happened. Ah. Fair point. :)

482

Posts

EW EXPLORER

Latest post on 08 March 2011 - 16:01

Is it possible just to do a quickie sharia marriage here so as not to fall afould of laws here, and then later do a formal marriage how you want. Not sure how it works, but maybe a possibility. First option I thought of, but DH will have to convert religon... Hang on ... am I missing something? Is the OP Muslim? If so, that throws all these ideas out. Absolutely no permission from ANY church of any faith will be given for a Muslim woman to marry outside of her faith in the UAE. Sorry if I'm jumping to conclusions here, but I saw the word 'sharia' and ... That's what come to my mind as well...esp when OP said that her OH would have to convert. I really hope not as her ex might use THIS in his custody battle. Hope it's just my misunderstanding.

Sticky Wicket36659

1511

Posts

EW EXPERT

Latest post on 08 March 2011 - 16:01

Why did you not use any contraception? You really need to ask yourself that. While the ins and outs of the OP's contraception methods haven't been discussed in detail, I believe she stressed that they were 'very careful' [and that her OH wasn't, er, contributing much to the transaction if you know what I mean!'> but despite that, I think that this question comes a bit late. And is a bit needless at this stage! In order to be pregnant her OH must have contributed and careful is proven time and time again to not work! LOL I was actually asking from the psychological aspect, because i don't believe women of a certain age and situation just get pregnant by mistake, which is why i was asking her to look deeper into how and why it happened. <em>edited by Sticky Wicket on 08/03/2011</em>

132

Posts

EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 08 March 2011 - 16:00

Is it possible just to do a quickie sharia marriage here so as not to fall afould of laws here, and then later do a formal marriage how you want. Not sure how it works, but maybe a possibility. First option I thought of, but DH will have to convert religon... Hang on ... am I missing something? Is the OP Muslim? If so, that throws all these ideas out. Absolutely no permission from ANY church of any faith will be given for a Muslim woman to marry outside of her faith in the UAE. Sorry if I'm jumping to conclusions here, but I saw the word 'sharia' and ... ....right I thought they were a catholic and a methodist.....

131

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EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 08 March 2011 - 15:59

Just a thought: if you will be remarried, will it help to get custody for your kids? I don’t know the local law, but I think it might help. Correct me, Ladies, if im wrong. edited by AriVW on 08/03/2011 Not at all, more chance under Sharia law of losing your children. oh, yes! i forgot the ..... mentality

42

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EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 08 March 2011 - 15:58

It seems obvious but don't see it mentioned - why not call your respective consulates to ask if they can list what is available here to get married quickly for you 2 ( if you decide that). Las Vagas seems a long way to go for a quick wedding! Just a thought - can you give birth here without any problems if the 9 months overlaps the marriage date?! I've heard some hospitals here ask to see the marriage cert. when babies are born. Good luck!

2222

Posts

EW EXPERT

Latest post on 08 March 2011 - 15:57

Are you Muslim? I ask because SW brought up the Shira law and you mentioned your court case with regards to custody? If so, will there not be any issues with Dubai authorities accepting marriage certificate if your DH inst Muslim....

1257

Posts

EW OLDHAND

Latest post on 08 March 2011 - 15:56

Why did you not use any contraception? You really need to ask yourself that. While the ins and outs of the OP's contraception methods haven't been discussed in detail, I believe she stressed that they were 'very careful' [and that her OH wasn't, er, contributing much to the transaction if you know what I mean!'> but despite that, I think that this question comes a bit late. And is a bit needless at this stage!

Sticky Wicket36659

1511

Posts

EW EXPERT

Latest post on 08 March 2011 - 15:55

Just a thought: if you will be remarried, will it help to get custody for your kids? I don’t know the local law, but I think it might help. Correct me, Ladies, if im wrong. edited by AriVW on 08/03/2011 Not at all, more chance under Sharia law of losing your children.

1257

Posts

EW OLDHAND

Latest post on 08 March 2011 - 15:54

Is it possible just to do a quickie sharia marriage here so as not to fall afould of laws here, and then later do a formal marriage how you want. Not sure how it works, but maybe a possibility. First option I thought of, but DH will have to convert religon... Hang on ... am I missing something? Is the OP Muslim? If so, that throws all these ideas out. Absolutely no permission from ANY church of any faith will be given for a Muslim woman to marry outside of her faith in the UAE. Sorry if I'm jumping to conclusions here, but I saw the word 'sharia' and ...

Sticky Wicket36659

1511

Posts

EW EXPERT

Latest post on 08 March 2011 - 15:53

Chocoa, i want you to think very seriously about all of this and make sure that you are not jumping into something you or your new partner are not ready for in both your lives at this time. You have to ask questions such as; Will this new development have any influence/affect over your custody case? If your ex DH pulls the Sharia line then yes you could lose custody of your children by bringing a new man into the house. Are you really both ready for 2 such huge commitments? (baby and marriage). What could you lose if this new marriage was not to work? How are you going to pay for the future? ie what if you lose your job, sponsor your new DH? There are some really big questions you need to ask and how would you feel if you lost the baby in the next few weeks? Would you still want your marriage to this new chap? How do you feel about that? Why did you not use any contraception? You really need to ask yourself that.

1257

Posts

EW OLDHAND

Latest post on 08 March 2011 - 15:52

www.christchurchjebelali.com has their contacts - they are Anglican which is a whole lot more than Church of England so makes no difference if you are English or not. They marry divorcees at their discretion dependent on individual cases. 'At their discretion' being the operative phrase here. Make sure you get all your 'ducks in a row' vis-a-vis the marriage -- seeing the chaplain together as a couple is one way of helping the process -- because regardless of there being special circumstances, they have to be very special indeed for an English C of E church to marry a couple where one or both have been divorced. You certainly would find it difficult to do in the UK. Good luck.

2725

Posts

EW EXPERT

Latest post on 08 March 2011 - 15:52

If I was in such a dilemma I would find the quickest and easiest solution and get the job done!!!!!!!!! and not be on a forum wasting precious time. edited by salsB on 08/03/2011 SalsB you had to make sure there's a rude poster here is it?? Not answerable to you but - I got good ideas here. Am in the office, so can't run around! DH is working on the Christ Church Jebel Ali option at the moment. Got a meeting with closest couple of friends tonight to work on this. Surely not wasting time, found out yest afternoon - what else do you want me to do?!? PS - Thanks AriVW edited by Chocoa on 08/03/2011 Im not a rude poster, im saying as it is!!!!!!!! ring your embassy and ask them the quickest way, bare in mind a live forum may not always know the correct answer to your questions anyway.

131

Posts

EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 08 March 2011 - 15:48

Just a thought: if you will be remarried, will it help to get custody for your kids? I don’t know the local law, but I think it might help. Correct me, Ladies, if im wrong. <em>edited by AriVW on 08/03/2011</em>

132

Posts

EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 08 March 2011 - 15:44

www.christchurchjebelali.com has their contacts - they are Anglican which is a whole lot more than Church of England so makes no difference if you are English or not. They marry divorcees at their discretion dependent on individual cases.

25

Posts

EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 08 March 2011 - 15:39

Congratulations! Get a quick marriage, listen to all the lovely ladies who had done this. And enjoy your little present! It seems the begining of your new live. What is meant to be is meant to be! Big hug! Great post :) Indeed! Apart from loads of practical options, I have got the comfort I needed. Thanks all. Really really thanks. Here's hoping the Christ Church option works, as it looks like our only workable option for a quick wedding, given our different nationalities. Will look at Hong Kong suggestion if this doesn't work. <em>edited by Chocoa on 08/03/2011</em>

1579

Posts

EW EXPERT

Latest post on 08 March 2011 - 15:37

Congratulations! Get a quick marriage, listen to all the lovely ladies who had done this. And enjoy your little present! It seems the begining of your new live. What is meant to be is meant to be! Big hug! Great post :)

Island Girl19012

105

Posts

EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 08 March 2011 - 15:37

Not sure what the rules are here and if they are the same but as far as I know, the only church that wont marry a divorcee is Catholic and they will do it as well if you get an annulment. They will marry any couples as far as I know if you want to get married and have the proper license. CONGRATS on the news though. Some things are just meant to be. Good Luck!

25

Posts

EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 08 March 2011 - 15:35

If I was in such a dilemma I would find the quickest and easiest solution and get the job done!!!!!!!!! and not be on a forum wasting precious time. edited by salsB on 08/03/2011 SalsB you had to make sure there's a rude poster here is it?? Not answerable to you but - I got good ideas here. Am in the office, so can't run around! DH is working on the Christ Church Jebel Ali option at the moment. Got a meeting with closest couple of friends tonight to work on this. Surely not wasting time, found out yest afternoon - what else do you want me to do?!? PS - Thanks AriVW <em>edited by Chocoa on 08/03/2011</em>

131

Posts

EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 08 March 2011 - 15:33

If I was in such a dilemma I would find the quickest and easiest solution and get the job done!!!!!!!!! and not be on a forum wasting precious time. edited by salsB on 08/03/2011 that is why she is here: to find "the quickest and easiest solution" :)

2725

Posts

EW EXPERT

Latest post on 08 March 2011 - 15:29

If I was in such a dilemma I would find the quickest and easiest solution and get the job done!!!!!!!!! and not be on a forum wasting precious time. <em>edited by salsB on 08/03/2011</em>

25

Posts

EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 08 March 2011 - 15:26

Is it possible just to do a quickie sharia marriage here so as not to fall afould of laws here, and then later do a formal marriage how you want. Not sure how it works, but maybe a possibility. First option I thought of, but DH will have to convert religon...

172

Posts

EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 08 March 2011 - 15:21

Is it possible just to do a quickie sharia marriage here so as not to fall afould of laws here, and then later do a formal marriage how you want. Not sure how it works, but maybe a possibility.

25

Posts

EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 08 March 2011 - 15:17

You have both jumped to the conclusion that I am advocating abortion. I most certainly did not! And would not to anyone else BUT I am talking about perhaps your future lies in another country as opposed to here. Not necessarily jumped to that conculsion, but your post does read that way - doesn't matter either way, but here or anywhere else is not very different if that's what you are suggesting, except here we have to get married. Of course if he found a job elsewhere we would move...I can't at the moment due to pending custody issues in Dubai courts for my kids and that for now at least I have a good job.

spongemonkey980

4329

Posts

EW MASTER

Latest post on 08 March 2011 - 15:12

You have both jumped to the conclusion that I am advocating abortion. I most certainly did not! And would not to anyone else BUT I am talking about perhaps your future lies in another country as opposed to here.

dutchdesert27532

33

Posts

EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 08 March 2011 - 15:10

Spongmonkey, you are right! But if the OP don't want an abortion, there is no alternative imho. And then you have to take steps. Maybe, just maybe we have to look at the bright sight and try to be positive. And like you said equally responsible.

25

Posts

EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 08 March 2011 - 15:06

Everyone gets carried away with the baby stuff but what about the realities of this situation? She may not have a job, he doesn't have a job, she has children already! (Sorry, OP, about the "she"and "he" ) Don't know your ages obviously ( maybe you are young) but I know a guy who was a "bit older" and got caught up in a situation like this and it REALLY does affect your life and not always in a positive way. edited to remove personal information. I don't see an option for us, we got pregnant and we have to deal with it. He is sensitive about an unborn child as I am, and was very affected by a late miscarriage his then wife had. Yes its going to be tough with our job situation, and we can only hope on that front. We have some savings between us that may help for a bit. Not easy but for me we have children a few born and grown up and one unborn, can't throw them away because we don't have jobs. I have no issue with anyone who decides to take a different course in the situation but its something I simply cant do. <em>edited by Chocoa on 09/03/2011</em>

spongemonkey980

4329

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EW MASTER

Latest post on 08 March 2011 - 14:46

PS I know the guy was [b'>equally [/b'>responsible !

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