Would you send your just turned 3 year old to school if you had a choice ? | ExpatWoman.com
 

Would you send your just turned 3 year old to school if you had a choice ?

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EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 12 October 2011 - 06:57

My DD has just turned 3 and out of the blue there is a space in a school close by that she can go to. I'm not prepared for this as really wanted her to start at 4 but appreciate that it's difficult to get into schools of choice that are close to home. If I dont take the space she may not get in next year. I have spoken to her nursery who think academically she will cope but maybe emotionally she will struggle.

She only goes to nursery 3 mornings a week as I don't work and I enjoy my time with her when shes not there, I don't want her to go into the system yet but now that this place has come up i feel extremely pressured/bullied to start her now.

What do I do ?

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EW EXPERT
Latest post on 18 October 2011 - 14:31
I wouldn't send my little ones to school before 4 either. DESS is a fantastic school and well worth the drive :)
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EW EXPERT
Latest post on 17 October 2011 - 22:39
A huge thank you to everyone that has replied to help me, just want to let you all know that I have decided that I can just not send her this year so will just take my chances and hope there is a FS2 place for her next September in the schools that I have registered her at. At the end of the day I just enjoy being with her so much and just want to have that special time with her for as long as possible and not be pressured into taking that away! that's great that you feel confident in your decision - don't let anyone knock that confidence! There is so much churn here in Dubai with people leaving that you never can tell - a friend was offered a place at her preferred school 2 days before term started and I was called up and offered one in advance too... something will turn up at the right time. It's funny how these things always happen for a reason.
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EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 17 October 2011 - 19:45
claire im glad that u came to a decision :) i hate taking decisions i have been told by several ppl that being the oldest will be of benefit to him. i know that every month will make a big difference in his development skills, but i also agree each kid is different i have applied for my son in 2 school with cut off dates of september 15 and 2 schools with cut off date of august 31. so 2 schools for fs1 2012-2013, and 2 schools Fs1 2013-1014. if we get accepted for next year i will put him in school and see how he coops, if he struggles i will make him repeat the year. i think this is the best thing i can do, i dont want to have doubts or regrets later on
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EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 17 October 2011 - 19:16
A huge thank you to everyone that has replied to help me, just want to let you all know that I have decided that I can just not send her this year so will just take my chances and hope there is a FS2 place for her next September in the schools that I have registered her at. At the end of the day I just enjoy being with her so much and just want to have that special time with her for as long as possible and not be pressured into taking that away!
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EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 15 October 2011 - 12:40
I have no idea (yet) about schools but I have a lot of experience working in the higher education sector in Dubai. It seems to be that children have to adapt to schools rather the other way around... knowing that the immense majority of education companies in Dubai run only for profit, this does not sound good to me. I understand the OP dilemma, but if all of us end up taking our children to the school when they are just 3 years old (instead when they are 5 years old, as it happens in the UK) schools are making an incredible amount of money (2 years more for each children of full fees) and it will make more difficult for everybody to get a place in the school at the rigt age (5 years old). If you feel your child is too young for school (and at 3 years old surely is) don't take him/her to the school. Just wait until is good for him/her. It annoys me that all these private companies have as a number 1 target to maximize benefits not taking into consideration the children's needs - this is wrong in so many ways!
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EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 15 October 2011 - 01:29
I did not start DS with FS1. He is a July born and I felt he was not ready. Though he might have proved me wrong! And our luck ... we got calls from two schools of our choice :\: If we were lucky this time ... I am sure we would be lucky again next year ;)
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EW MASTER
Latest post on 14 October 2011 - 21:15
I have thought about putting her in FS1 next year instead but as said If we return to the UK she will then be a year behind and I will really hate myself for that! She won't, though. In the UK, not that they have FS1, but if they did, it would be during the academic year she turns 4, and reception (FS2 equivalent) is the academic year she turns 5. My DD is a September baby (not baby any more really) and although she could quite easily tackle the FS2 curriculum, I've kept her in the year of her age. I have several friends with professional experience in the area (Head of Reception in an excellent UK school, and Occupational Therapist and a Speech Therapist) who all agree there is a noticeable advantage at being amongst the eldest in a class and that children who are in school before they're ready rarely have problems in the actual reception (FS2) year, but start having them in Year 1. Of course, it's your choice, but just don't be too hasty... or at least do it for the right reasons. Yes, I agree with you and am happy that other professionals have said the same thing. That is why I am confident in my decision to keep my DD in FS 2 for two years. She is doing fine now but surely the problems will creep up in Year 1. <em>edited by AnonDubai on 14/10/2011</em>
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EW EXPERT
Latest post on 14 October 2011 - 20:55
I have thought about putting her in FS1 next year instead but as said If we return to the UK she will then be a year behind and I will really hate myself for that! She won't, though. In the UK, not that they have FS1, but if they did, it would be during the academic year she turns 4, and reception (FS2 equivalent) is the academic year she turns 5. My DD is a September baby (not baby any more really) and although she could quite easily tackle the FS2 curriculum, I've kept her in the year of her age. I have several friends with professional experience in the area (Head of Reception in an excellent UK school, and Occupational Therapist and a Speech Therapist) who all agree there is a noticeable advantage at being amongst the eldest in a class and that children who are in school before they're ready rarely have problems in the actual reception (FS2) year, but start having them in Year 1. Of course, it's your choice, but just don't be too hasty... or at least do it for the right reasons.
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EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 14 October 2011 - 14:53
To the OP, I am so sorry I don't mean to hijack your thread. I dont have any advice for you as i am new to to this myself but i hope whatever you choose will work out to be the best for your child.
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EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 14 October 2011 - 14:51
KellsBelles, my son is exactly a year younger than yours and I was considering putting him in school next academic year, does it mean he is going to be one of the youngest in his class? This age cut off thing really confuses me as different schools have different dates. I would really be concerned as my son is shy and quiet as it is without adding the stress of pressure at school. Please let me know. Thanks.
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EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 14 October 2011 - 11:59
I'm also going to attempt the DESS morning run from home and revisit Greenfields if possible before I sign the acceptance letter. go with your instincts :0) I can't speak highly enough of the KG department at Greenfields, they will be honest with you about how well your LO is adapting. Having said that, if you are going to be here long term, have a good look at the primary school level. Greenfields suited us to a T with KG but did not in the primary level and it was not that easy to move schools once we were there.
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EW EXPERT
Latest post on 14 October 2011 - 11:22
I would say Nursery is a good thing, the kids start to learn and interact early. Maybe consider part time to start with and then decide if full time would be suitable.
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EW GURU
Latest post on 14 October 2011 - 10:32
Wow. Can't believe I'm the only one saying "go for it". I guess it's what worked best for us. I had my reservations when we decided to send DS. but we are planning on being in Dubai for a long time still and thus, getting DS into the best school possible was HUGE on our list. The fact that he is now going 5 days a week and his days are more structured and he's not with me 90% of the time as he'd been used to, is a HUGE adjustment, yes - but one I that I believe has done him the world of good. We're only 5 weeks into FS1 and he has grown so much and really developing into a lovely child. He is getting much more out of it then he did at nursery and is SO much happier and more confident then he ever was at nursery...in fact, he keeps asking me if he can stay at his new school forever and never go back to the other one (nursery). His social skills are improving by the day, as is every other learning field. He is in NO way being emotionally scared. DS is one of the eldest (9/11/07) and believe me, there are a few who are about 5 months younger then him and they are leaps ahead in terms of confidence and even in a few physical aspects eg. toilet training. So I think yes, get everyones opinion - but at the end of the day only you know your child and you know the pros and cons of sending her and securing this place or taking a chance on getting her in later. Good luck, I'm sure you will make the right decision for you and your family.
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EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 14 October 2011 - 08:36
Wow ladies thank you so much for your replies it's really helping me to hear from your experiences. I didn't sleep much last night and through out the night she was NOT going then she WAS going, this is the most difficult decision i have had to make so far as a mum!!! mpenny101 - your comment has really helped me, the fact that FS1 is no where near as strict and will prepare her for FS2 and yes the fact that this school run is going to happen for many years it needs to be a good one if given the option. I have thought about putting her in FS1 next year instead but as said If we return to the UK she will then be a year behind and I will really hate myself for that! I received a phone call yesterday telling me that her application has been accepted and I now have 7 days to make my decision (typically they do assessments but in this case she has just been accepted as it suits them and they want my money!!!) I found out that in one of the classes there are 4 children already that were born in August and as I requested she can go into this class so she will be one of 5 young threes and this makes me feel much happier. I'm going to call the school on Sunday and see if I can take her to meet the teacher, I'm hoping they will let me do this. I'm also going to attempt the DESS morning run from home and revisit Greenfields if possible before I sign the acceptance letter.
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EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 13 October 2011 - 21:56
My DS is 25/08 and just started Reception at 4 yrs old after a great year in FS1 at nursery. We got a place in a good school that just started in Reception. I hedged my bets and only put his name down at schools that start at Reception, or have many more spaces open up as I know how unsuccessful waiting lists can be for sought after schools that start at FS1 (We went for Jebel Ali, DESS & Horizon). Nursery to school is a huge jump, and to be honest I think we're both feeling it even now. I have a friend who has a son just started at school at FS1 and from our comparisons it is half way between nursery and school, it is no way as strict as where we have started in Reception in terms of timings, parent/teacher interaction so in many ways I feel it's a good start. If your child is physically ready (ie. potty trained) I would go for it. You will spend the next 8 years of your life doing the school run and a good reputation plus location is very important, there were many parents in my sons nursery FS1 that had to take places at schools that were not 1st choice, over the other end of town or even worse they still had no place when nursery broke up. The teachers will support both you and her in terms of emotional development, and when she goes into FS2 she will be ready to learn. FS1 is the same curriculum at school and nursery theoretically, it's just location and rules that are different, and I think in many ways FS1 is a great inbetween. It really is a personal decision and it worked for me in many ways to keep my son out, but had I been handed a place at an ideal school during FS1 I would have probably made the move early.
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EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 13 October 2011 - 16:14
My dd is going to be the youngest in school year (born 31st august). We were debating when to send her to school - keep her in the year she should be or delay her a year. I spoke to a teacher in the UK where we are from and she said that if we were to go back whilst my dd was still in education she would go in the school year of her age so on that basis we have decided to put her in the school year that she should be.
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EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 13 October 2011 - 15:23
Yes, she started Fs1 and turned 4 a few days later. With her Birthday in September I could have started her in school last year,theoriectically, but looking back I am glad that I didn't , there are worlds between last year and now in terms of her development. It would have been extremly difficult for her to adjust to big school then. She benefitted much more from going to nursery a few days a week last year and loves going to big school now.
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EW MASTER
Latest post on 13 October 2011 - 15:15
Hi Claire. I had a similar issue with my DD. She turned 3 on September 8th last year and I let her start FS 1 then. She did pretty well in FS 1 but she struggled with some things as she was almost a year younger than many of the students in her class. She is now in FS 2 at the age of 4 and some children in her class are almost 6! Anyway, what I have decided to do is have her repeat FS 2 next year. That way she can still be in school but will catch up with her age group. It's a tough decision, but you know your child best and can make the right decision for her. Hi AnonDubai, I was wondering what school is ur little one going to? i am having some issues applying for some schools because my son turns 3 on september 1st of next year. i have been told that i have to wait another year to put him in FS1 :( im also wondering if i did find a school that would accept his application, should i let him start or wait the year? MM, IMHO, you should not put your son into FS 1 next September unless you are planning to do what I will do and have him repeat either FS 1 or FS 2. That is only my opinion and you know him best, but as a previous poster said: "Starting early doesn't mean a better start in academia."
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EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 13 October 2011 - 14:45
Hi Kiwispiers i do know people that have done this but we own the villa we live in and only moved in 6 months ago, so not really no....
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EW EXPERT
Latest post on 13 October 2011 - 14:12
would you considering moving house to be closer to whatever school can accept her when she is ready?
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EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 13 October 2011 - 14:01
Thanjs everyone - The pressure I'm feeling here is if I don't start her until FS2 I'm going to struggle to get her into a school, it just doesn't seem as simple as if I don't want her to go!! I have her registered at DESS but its a helluva trek from where i live and I have her registered at Greenfields but this is an IB school and i would prefer her to do British Curriculum. I couldn't get her in anywhere else apart from JPS but they only open up one extra class in FS2 and siblings and debentures get priorty so there is no chance of her getting in. I'm thinking of paying to secure the place but starting her in January so at least she will be 3 and 4months!! Lilli34 did you start your DD a year later then in FS1?
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EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 13 October 2011 - 10:54
I would let her start school next year. We had the same decision to make and although DD is now one of the oldest in her class she doesn't struggle as much as her younger peers. She enjoys school and being older has the advantage that she already knows things/masters skills some of the very young classmates struggle with, which is a big confidence booster. And a place in the best school,won't do any good if you DD ends up struggling to cope with the stricter on learning focused environment of school
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EW EXPERT
Latest post on 13 October 2011 - 09:35
No I wouldn't, unless you truly feel your child is VERY mature for her age. Regardless of how good the school is, she will always be at a disadvantage from an emotional developmental point of view, whether she is 3, 6, 9, 12. If she starts before she is ready, it could have a real emotional affect on her, and this in turn could affect her not just socially but academically. Too big a risk in my mind.
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EW GURU
Latest post on 13 October 2011 - 09:28
Yes. And we did just this. DS started FS1 in September. I felt it was a bit early and he was still young but it was a place in a great school, 2 min drive from home. It's been a big adjustment. He'd only just done 3 mornings a week at nursery 10 weeks prior, so it was all very new to him. But he's settled wondefully and is very happy. If you plan to stay in Dubai for the next 3/4 or more years, I'd say go for it. Obviously if it was easier to get a position in FS2 I'd say hold back, but this is unfortunately not the case here.
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EW EXPERT
Latest post on 12 October 2011 - 23:12
Nope, I wouldn't... not unless you know that the school days are structured the same as in nursery. I have several friends whose children have started school this year and they are rising 4 (so 4 in the new year) and although they appear to enjoy it, they are having a few adjustment issues to the more formal school structure. 3 is waaaaaaaaay young for a school structure. In the UK, kids don't start reception until the academic year they turn 5 and those that have difficulties adjusting are invariably the youngest. In Scandinavia, they don't start until 6 or 7. Follow your instincts. Starting early doesn't mean a better start in academia.
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EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 12 October 2011 - 14:35
Hi Claire. I had a similar issue with my DD. She turned 3 on September 8th last year and I let her start FS 1 then. She did pretty well in FS 1 but she struggled with some things as she was almost a year younger than many of the students in her class. She is now in FS 2 at the age of 4 and some children in her class are almost 6! Anyway, what I have decided to do is have her repeat FS 2 next year. That way she can still be in school but will catch up with her age group. It's a tough decision, but you know your child best and can make the right decision for her. Hi AnonDubai, I was wondering what school is ur little one going to? i am having some issues applying for some schools because my son turns 3 on september 1st of next year. i have been told that i have to wait another year to put him in FS1 :( im also wondering if i did find a school that would accept his application, should i let him start or wait the year?
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EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 12 October 2011 - 13:33
Thanks for your help everyone, its such a tough decision i'm just so torn in what to do for the best. On one hand I really want her to go to this school as the location suits me and I just know she has a slim chance of getting in at FS2 and on the other I want her at home with me until she is 4 or 18 hahaha!! My mum thinks im crazy and that she is too young but she doesn't understand the system here. I know that my heart is telling me she is too young but I also know that Dubai schools are full of children her age having a great time......oooooo
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EW GURU
Latest post on 12 October 2011 - 09:03
Follow your instincts. I have so often felt pressured into a decision re my kids, not followed instinct and then wished had. My DS2 is in FS1 and turns four in April. It is a long week but he is able to cope and is thriving in the new environment. But each child is different and some of the even younger ones do seem so small to be in full-time education. If it's any help, though, the time is primarily play-based and DS is making lots of friends and learning lots of fun stuff. Instincts!
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EW MASTER
Latest post on 12 October 2011 - 08:55
Hi Claire. I had a similar issue with my DD. She turned 3 on September 8th last year and I let her start FS 1 then. She did pretty well in FS 1 but she struggled with some things as she was almost a year younger than many of the students in her class. She is now in FS 2 at the age of 4 and some children in her class are almost 6! Anyway, what I have decided to do is have her repeat FS 2 next year. That way she can still be in school but will catch up with her age group. It's a tough decision, but you know your child best and can make the right decision for her.
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EW NEWBIE
Latest post on 12 October 2011 - 07:53
Thanks Guinness, from what I can understand the schools are a lot more academic and stricter than the nurseries, for example they have to go every day and be there on time, there is more discipline in the classes and corridors and more focus on learning than play. I am worried about getting her into a school next year but slightly more worried about pushing her too early. I will enquire about the ages in the class that's a good idea. If she was say 4 months older I would be happier but she's not....
 
 

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