Anyone out there who genuine efforts at sleep training didn't work

Back again ladies with the latest update. I have removed the sides of her cot and she was involved in this. I explained to her that cots are for babies and we were making her a 'big girls bed'. She couldn't wait for her dad to come home to show him. I also let her choose which teddy she wanted in the bed with her. She's very happy about me reading the 2 books in the room , after this I turned out the main light and told her its time to go to sleep, I sat of the chair for a bit then left and repeated this for 20 mins by which time she was asleep. She seemed much less edgy when she knew I was going to sit on the chair, tho I know this cant go on forever either. That's aid she hasn't woken yet and even that is progress as she would often have woken 3 a 5 times between bedtime and now (10pm) . Lets see what the night brings, I just hope we don't have a 2 hr wide awake session during the night which we quite often do! While I realize this is far from the 'ideal' bedtime, it's certainly a lot less stressful for her and us and hopefully she will have more restful nights from now on. The bottle in bed is also gone tho strangely it didn't really bother her. I'll give an update in a few days when more of a pattern has developed. I can't thank u all enough for your advice. Xxxx

Hi ladies, thank you all so much for taking the time to write about your experiences with your babies. Really appreciate this and soooo helpful. So week 1 is down now and we agreed at the start that this would be our cut off point if we saw no real improvements, which we haven't . Sydneygal I can't believe u only had 1 night of 20 mins crying ! That's amazing. I also thought the video monitor was a fantastic idea as one night I was in the kitchen and could have swore I heard a big thud and was sure she had climbed out of the cot and fallen on the tiles and I felt sick going in to check. Somebody also suggested introducing a bed which might work as in some ways I think the cot has become a negative place for her. Let me explain what I / we were doing in the past re bedtime, dinner approx 5.30/ 6, wash and pj's after that, read some books on the sofa in the kitchen, make a bottle for bed, into bed @ 7 / 7.30 where I would sit / stand next to the cot pat and shush. The problem was this could take up to an hr before she slept and even then she could wake up to 5 times before we even went to bed, and one of us would go in to settle her each time. She also woke during the night and after a while (we both work full time & wake @ 5.30 ev' morn) we would take her into our bed. In the end I felt like she was waking constantly in the hopes that it was time to get into bed with us. This has been happening since she was 16 mths and we felt she really wasn't getting a proper nights sleep , our whole evening and many nights were taken up with settling her, which is ultimately what drove us to sleep training . I think I should add that she is quite a nervous child who generally needs lots of reassurance, takes a long time to warm to new people, is very shy in company etc etc.. She has become very fretful about bed since we started the training and the minutes we start the routine or mention it she starts to cry, tell me please mummy no and is completely on edge. So..........I think what we were doing this wk is..... sit in the room but away from the cot, read 2 books, then tell her its time to sleep and mummy / daddy will be here but no interaction. hopefully this will give her the reassurnce she needs for now and then over time we can phase this out. Putting her down awake in her cot, explaining it was bedtime and leaving, then coming to the door every 20 mins or so to reassure) was too extreme for her. I forgot to mention that after the 2 / 2.5 hours of crying and eventually passing out she was still waking loads during the night and is at this point she is a very tired little girl .Thank you all again so much for ur ideas, support, time and sharing your invaluable experiences. .