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EWmums

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ewmoda

how long did it take you to settle in?

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144

Posts

EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 22 September 2011 - 09:34

Been here since february and we all settled in really quickly with regards to house, school etc. But belonging not so much yet. Im trying though, have people to chat to at school but only 1 or 2 out of it. Missing my girlie mates and putting the world to rights over a bottle of wine. Oh and not glam in the slightest, far too much effort getting the kids ready in the morning never mind me!

2937

Posts

EW EXPERT

Latest post on 22 September 2011 - 09:31

Glam? GLAM? Come round to my place any time before midday or any time after 3pm and you'll find me in my PJs, hair tied back, usually covered in whatever we had for breakfast or lunch :D. I know exactly what you mean, though - this place makes you feel underdressed if you don't look like you're going to the opera when you're standing at the meat counter in the supermarket. I got here a while ago when I was much younger and I hated it for three months. I was fully intending to leave at the six-month point when I didn't owe the company any money for bringing me over here. And... that was a long time ago. There are plenty of people who'll say hi then go back to their conversations like you don't exist. They suck. But as aroha says, in the end you'll be able to laugh at them (and do take her up on the offer - I can guarantee she is as normal as they come!). Just remember the glam ones are probably the ones who'd be in their full make-up and gladrags to do the school run at home so nobody knows what they're really like. That's the beauty of this place for these types - nobody knows where you came from!

1692

Posts

EW EXPERT

Latest post on 22 September 2011 - 09:29

Luckily the whole family just clicked when we landed. Don't worry about how others like to look or live their lives, just be comfortable and confident with yourself. I love doing the school run and seeing all the different styles, pyjamas, chanel, and then my fav jeans and T shirt..... There are loads of lovely people here who are normal and have no expectations you will find them trust me. Whereabouts are you living? <em>edited by emlsnre on 22/09/2011</em>

3901

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EW MASTER

Latest post on 22 September 2011 - 09:26

Can't answer because i don't know !! What does it feel like to be settled ? lol We've been here just over a year and i agree with everything CocoPops has said - the glam thing is just so me..but to be honest i don't feel unusual - many of the mums i see at school are just the same and the glam ones seem to stand out... I've met lots of fab ppl through coffee mornings and we were fortunate to have a family from husband's work living nearby who "showed us the ropes" when we arrived... Keep on keeping on is all i can say really...

594

Posts

EW GURU

Latest post on 22 September 2011 - 09:21

Settled immediately, but didn't feel I 'belonged' for about a year.

31

Posts

EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 22 September 2011 - 09:15

coco pops, I have been wondering the same thing and also feeling not quite "glam" enough to be here. We've only been here for a little more than 3 weeks and I know quite a bit of culture shock is completely normal but I am just hoping to feel more settled and less miserable soon. I'm just feeling quite isolated and lonely and the kids are bored and stir-crazy. I have 3 little ones who I homeschool so we don't have the opportunity to meet people through the kids' school. I'm hoping once the weather improves we can get out more and meet some people. I was so excited to come here and now I just find myself wishing for this year to pass as quickly as possible.

5452

Posts

EW MASTER

Latest post on 22 September 2011 - 08:39

I settled in immediately, but I am an extremely adaptable person.

173

Posts

EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 22 September 2011 - 08:24

6 months. the first time. 1 month every time I return. Hang in there. It gets better.

25

Posts

EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 22 September 2011 - 08:20

I came to Dubai for 10 weeks and then had to return home for 6 weeks (pre-arranged childrens specialist appointments) leaving DH here and now the children and I have been back 7 weeks.....and it's hard! The thing with me is that I want to be here, I like the adventure, I like that we go out to dinner regularly as a family and I'm excited about future opportunities. But I definatly do not feel settled and I know it's early days. I thought the neighbours may have welcomed us, but that hasn't happened. I on the other hand welcomed a neighbour who moved in after us, but his wife and children do not arrive for several months. I then thought that I would meet other mum's once school started, but they don't seem to get out of their cars, so I'm not sure how that is going to happen. I went to my daughter's netball trials after school yesterday, and in Australia all of the parents would attend these, but I was the only parent there! Unlike you coco pops I haven't met anyone yet so I keep thinking that once that happens I will feel settled. I know it's hard, but you've been here less time than myself, according to the the other threads it can take a very long time so hang in there, that's what I'm trying to do.

2322

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EW EXPERT

Latest post on 22 September 2011 - 08:10

coco pops, no matter if you have been here 5 minutes or 5 years, you will still have the pleasure of meeting those types of people. The difference will be that when you ARE settled, happy in your own skin you will be able to just raise your eyebrows at it all and have a quiet giggle to yourself. Be reassured that there are loads of 'real' people around and you will meet them, and you will make good friends. When that happens you will feel 'settled'. This is a tough place for the first few months while you find your feet, and it makes all the difference in the world when you find that girlfriend to share all the fun and games with, drink copious amounts of coffee (wine) with, commiserate with, laugh with and chat with. It will happen too, stay positive, stay true to yourself and meet each day as an adventure. my email addy is: ari underscore jo 2002 at yahoo dot co dot nz drop me a line if you would like me to point you in the direction of some very cool down to earth types :)

394

Posts

EW EXPLORER

Latest post on 22 September 2011 - 07:47

OK so I try and be positive and take a day at a time, but there are times when I think I'm just not "glam" enough to be here ...I'm sure people mistake me for the maid on the days when I just can't be bothered to dress up....which are most days! :) [b'>me too, its too hot to bother. id end up looking like alice cooper if i put on make-up in the humidity![/b'> I suppose it doesn't help either when you hear negative stuff about the people all being superficial here. I try not to go down that line and take people for what they are....but boy some people are just so hard to have a conversation with, it's like they just can't be bothered to talk to a newbie:( [b'>Yep i found a LOT of superficial people her when i first arrived, think they think cause they've got a maid/gardener/driver that they're "It"[/b'> I've totally gone out of my comfort zone and joined a group of people at a gathering & said hi blah blah blah & yes they say hi back then go on to totally ignore me and carry on their conversation without even trying to include me. I dunno, because I'm not that type of person myself I find it hard when people are like that to me....if that makes sense? [b'>yes i found this too. I found that people had already formed cliques. it was like being back at school trying to talk to the "cool crowd"[/b'> I find it gets harder when you're older....IMO anyway ... [b'>well im a spring chicken so no probs there. folk can still look down thier nose at you no matter what your age is[/b'> Oh well tomorrow is another day & I shall stay positive.....after all the stress I had moving here, there's no way I'm moving back.....not yet anyway! coco pops - im getting the vibe that you are a brit (most probably a scot :-)) I moved here from scotland and found it a massive culture/climate shock!! nearly 10 months later i feel im settling in but not settled if that makes sense?

1579

Posts

EW EXPERT

Latest post on 22 September 2011 - 06:09

I don't think I ever fully settled in but after 6 months when I had a routine, felt more confident in my job and had made some friends it was not as difficult as it had been. Having a positive attitude makes a big difference. If I wanted to remain miserable I could. If I wanted to see the positive side of the ME I could. The choice was mine, and is yours. Once you conciously decide to be happier and as fulfilled as possible you will settle more. Good luck x

605

Posts

EW GURU

Latest post on 22 September 2011 - 02:03

Thank you too Jetset :)

605

Posts

EW GURU

Latest post on 22 September 2011 - 02:02

Coco Pops, please, come round to my place! Thank you Simpleasabc :) only if you promise not to pick out any grammatical errors I may make on future posts ;) ( because I'll probably make lots) hehehe you did make me lol while reading your posts earlier today.

176

Posts

EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 22 September 2011 - 01:06

Hi... late at night and understanding how you feel... have lived in more than 10 countries so am very used to feeling a bit strange and lonely for more than a while... there are always wonderful friends to be made out there and from the posts you have received you can see that you just have to find friends that you can fit in with and be happy to be with. Dubai is what you make it... the same as any other place and having children makes making friends a whole lot easier... don't worry..in a few months you will be happy and comfortable here! Just wake up in the morning and smile... and know that it does get better!

5400

Posts

EW MASTER

Latest post on 22 September 2011 - 00:59

Coco Pops, please, come round to my place!

605

Posts

EW GURU

Latest post on 22 September 2011 - 00:11

Thank you Yorky :)

1440

Posts

EW OLDHAND

Latest post on 22 September 2011 - 00:09

Not everyone in Dubai is 'glam', so do not feel like you need to fit in with something you are not comfortable with. The early days are hard because you will meet people that do the pleasantries but then the conversation goes nowhere but hold in there you might find some equally minded people and strike a friendship. Give it time and hopefully you will feel more comfortable in your new surroundings, good luck x

605

Posts

EW GURU

Latest post on 21 September 2011 - 23:59

OK so I try and be positive and take a day at a time, but there are times when I think I'm just not "glam" enough to be here ...I'm sure people mistake me for the maid on the days when I just can't be bothered to dress up....which are most days! :) I suppose it doesn't help either when you hear negative stuff about the people all being superficial here. I try not to go down that line and take people for what they are....but boy some people are just so hard to have a conversation with, it's like they just can't be bothered to talk to a newbie:( I've totally gone out of my comfort zone and joined a group of people at a gathering & said hi blah blah blah & yes they say hi back then go on to totally ignore me and carry on their conversation without even trying to include me. I dunno, because I'm not that type of person myself I find it hard when people are like that to me....if that makes sense? I find it gets harder when you're older....IMO anyway ... Oh well tomorrow is another day & I shall stay positive.....after all the stress I had moving here, there's no way I'm moving back.....not yet anyway!

129

Posts

EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 21 September 2011 - 23:45

The first time I lived in the UAE it took me 6 months to 'feel it'!! This time, it took me 2 minutes as like a previous poster said, it was only when I left that I fully realised how great it was!! On average though, I think about a year to feel settled is about right. :) <em>edited by delvin on 21/09/2011</em>

169

Posts

EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 21 September 2011 - 23:08

I lived "full time" in Dubai for 3 years I never thought I had really settled until I left in August to Jordan with my husbands job. I now travel between Jordan and Dubai and only after leaving I realized how amazing my life in Dubai was. Don't compare it to anywhere before as it is so different to anywhere. Dubai has a lot to offer and it truly is what you make of it. There are good and bad people like anywhere in the world. Enjoy it I would do anything to be back full time rather than every so often

Sugarbeach23383

1566

Posts

EW EXPERT

Latest post on 21 September 2011 - 22:57

Been here just over a year...it's getting better, but don't think we're there yet. But it's been an "eventful" year for us personally anyway.... <em>edited by Sugarbeach on 21/09/2011</em>

1440

Posts

EW OLDHAND

Latest post on 21 September 2011 - 22:56

For me it was probably about six months. The stress of moving to a different country, new job, finding somewhere to live and all the other things that come with it does take it's toll, especially if you are missing friends and family too. Just take one day at a time and think of things you do like about being here. I'm not sure exactly what changed for me, I guess I decided to start having a more positive attitude and give it a try and somewhere along that journey I realized I had become more settled, and now I wouldn't want to be anywhere else!

amandamusic34668

74

Posts

EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 21 September 2011 - 22:48

About 3 years. Dubai is a very different place. It takes a while find your place, I think.

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