Guide

Top 10 Most Affordable Budget Airlines in the UAE For Your Next Trip

Dubai Expat Resident Receives Commemorate Passport Stamp After 60 Years

UAE Breaks Heat Record With 51.6°C - Here’s How to Stay Safe and Sane This Summer

Dubai Just Launched a Travel Influencer Academy

List of UAE Public Holidays in 2025: Announced and Expected Dates

Pictured: His Highness Sheikh Mohammed at a UAE Cabinet meeting.

H.H Sheikh Mohammed Ranks 3 Best & Worst UAE Government Departments

There's a 10-Year UAE Residency Visa for Dubai Content Creators and Influencers

You Can Now Enjoy Breakfast With Penguins in Dubai

Confirmed: 2025 Will Be The 'Year of Community' in The UAE

Classifieds

Jobs

How to Get a UAE Influencer License: Step-By-Step Guide & Requirements

Dubai Announces Pilot Launch of 4-Day Work Week For Employees

UAE Job Loss Insurance Claim Rejected? Here's Why It Could Happen

How to Claim UAE Job Loss Insurance: Eligibility and Step-by-Step Guide

Dubai Ranked Among Top 5 Cities in the World to Work In

Can I Get Fired in the UAE For My Mental Health Condition?

Dubai Dedicates AED 150 Million Government Support Fund For Influencers

How to Deal With Workplace Harassment in the UAE

The UAE's New End-of-Service Programme, Explained for Residents

Events

UAE Breaks Heat Record With 51.6°C - Here’s How to Stay Safe and Sane This Summer

When Is the Next UAE Public Holiday? Eid Al Adha 2025 Dates Revealed

Real Madrid World is Celebrating World Football Day With AED 199 Tickets

List of UAE Public Holidays in 2025: Announced and Expected Dates

Win Cash Prizes Up to AED 300 For Every Kilo Lost With UAE's Weight Loss Challenge

Eid Al Fitr 2025 in the UAE: When is the Long Weekend?

Ramadan 2025 in Dubai: List of Ramadan Markets to Explore

Where to Celebrate Chinese New Year 2025 in Dubai

An Enchanting Regency-Era Evening Awaits at Dubai's Bridgerton Candlelight Concert

Education

Back-to-School, Reimagined: How UAE Families Are Choosing a Smarter Start to the School Year

Embark on a Summer Adventure at Kids First Group Universe!

Top 5 Online Schools For Expat Families in the Middle East

Dubai IB School's Class of 2025 Secures Over $10 Million in University Scholarships

Experience Summer Learning at its Best with MDX Study Camps at Middlesex University Dubai

Introducing the Executive Hospitality Programme at South View School Dubai

Where to Choose the Best EYFS Children's Nursery in Dubai Marina

Nurturing Compassionate Leaders: 8 Ways Dibber Preschools Prepares Your Child

How to Make the Transition to University Life Easier

Money

Hidden Costs of Expat Life in Dubai (and How to Outsmart Them)

UAE Unveils New Official Dirham Symbol, Inspired By the Country's Flag

6 Financial Resolutions to Make for the New Year

Meet Dr. Hassan Elhais: A Pillar of Legal Expertise for Expats in the UAE

Meet the Emirati Woman Breaking Grounds in UAE Law: Awatif Khouri

Why Teens Need Real-World Financial Education?

UAE Residents Be Wary of Food Delivery Scams

5 Signs You've Been Scammed Over the Phone, and What to Do Next

UAE Job Loss Insurance Claim Rejected? Here's Why It Could Happen

Home

Are "Own Visa" and Freelancer Visa Domestic Workers Legal in the UAE?

Hiring a Maid in the UAE: 5 Legal Red Flags

Ask a UAE Flower Shop: Your Most Common Questions, Answered

FYI Dubai is Banning All Single Use Bags From June 1

Carrefour's 'Choose Better' Programme is Here to Reward Healthier Choices With 10x the Points

Are UAE Domestic Helpers Allowed to Work on a Trial Period and Hired After?

Pet Breeding in the UAE: Is it Allowed and Where to Find Legal Pet Breeders

Choithrams Announces Launch of All-Women Operated Store in the UAE

Where to Order Same-Day Valentine's Day Flowers in the UAE

Car

These Are Dubai's New Public Parking Fees From April 2025

How to Convert a Non-UAE Driving License in Dubai: A Complete Guide

Dubai Public Commute Timings & Road Closures for New Year's Eve

Booking Taxis in Dubai: How to Hail a Taxi Through WhatsApp

What Are the Requirements For a Car Loan in Dubai?

UAE Petrol Prices Will Increase in August 2024

Head's Up! Dubai Taxi Fares Will Increase in May 2024

UAE Announces New Fuel Prices For May 2024

Missing UAE License Plates: How to Report a Lost Plate or Reclaim Yours

Wellness

Win Cash Prizes Up to AED 300 For Every Kilo Lost With UAE's Weight Loss Challenge

9 Warning Signs for Breast Cancer

Top Tips to Have a Healthy Heart in the UAE

Discover "The New You" at Zieda's Aesthetic Clinic in Dubai

Top Ladies-Only Gyms and Fitness Centres in Dubai

Say Goodbye to Wrinkles With Mediclinic's Botox Mondays Offer

Get Expert Healthcare and Wellness Delivered to Your Doorstep in Dubai Within 30 Minutes

Top 7 Scenic UAE Jogging and Running Routes

IVF in the UAE: Unmarried Non-Muslim Couples Are Allowed to Undergo IVF

Shop

Shopping In Dubai

Best Online Shopping Sites in Dubai and UAE

An A-Z Guide to Dubai's Popular Malls

What To Wear At The Beach In Dubai

14 Hilarious Realities of Visiting Dubai Mall

Every Day is a Discount Day on THIS Deals Site

Cityland Mall Preview: Dubai's New Nature-Inspired Shopping Mall

EWmums

EWfood

ewmoda

How do you keep MIL happy?

74

Posts

EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 11 April 2013 - 02:10

Does it work to just be genuine and respectful or not?

What specific things/events/acts do you employ to achieve this.

Log in to post new content in the forum.

19

Posts

EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 19 April 2013 - 14:29

MIL takes very good care of herself, facials once a month, massages, gymming 4 to 5 days a week... Etc. and so for the last 4 years that I have been married, she likes to show her concern by telling me 'I look tired' almost every weekend that we go over! :'( initially I used to say, yeah... Didn't sleep well last night (which was rarely true, but didn't know what else to say!). Ayer a while I switched it to 'no actually I'm very good today!' Hoping that this would make her think twice about asking! Naturally, it didn't work. Then I told her the truth, that my dark circles are genetic as my father and half of my family have them and they will not go away. (No matter how much makeup I would use and how many concealers I changed, she could still see them!) I gave birth a month ago, had a tough time and some baby blues.... A week and a half ago she comes over and as I'm feeding my daughter she says 'you look tired, why?' SERIOUSLY?!???!!! So I said, 'don't you get tired of asking me that? They're GENETIC! They WON'T go away and there's NOTHING I can do about it!' Needless to say, she didn't respond.

1236

Posts

EW OLDHAND

Latest post on 12 April 2013 - 11:55

Don't criticise or complain about your husband in front of her, accept her advice and decide later whether or not you will follow it, follow her house rules in her house even if they are stupid, try not to be jealous of the special relationship she has with your husband. I have a little boy now who I absolutely adore and it gives me a much better insight into why MILs can be overbearing, your husband will always be their precious little boy and so long as they think he is just as precious to you you will be on the same team, rather than rivals. My MIL and I disagree on many points, and probably both bite our tongues a lot but I actually love her, she is part of my family and is the reason my husband is the man I chose to marry. I did have a special relationship with my MIL. She was half English half Welsh while my FIL was Scottish (as we are) Used to tease each other mercilessly about nationality but was just banter! I called her "mither" which is a Scot's slant on mother and it infuriated her but just in a jokey way? She was an earthy lady and she often took my side. If I did complain about my DH "drives me nuts when he leaves the mail lying about" she'd say "oh yes, just like his father" She was first at my side when I suffered a miscarriage at home as my own parents were away on holiday and at the time, we lived in the same street. She held me in her arms as I sobbed and waited for a doctor to arrive. I just hope that I'm half the MIL to my SIL as she was to me. RIP "mither Bell" xx

45

Posts

EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 12 April 2013 - 11:47

Sounds like a very selfish comment Appletiser.... Maybe I'm taking the word 'need' literally. But surely if you can influence someones happiness you should try.... <em>edited by SurreySue on 12/04/2013</em>

3220

Posts

EW MASTER

Latest post on 12 April 2013 - 11:45

I never tried and I'm accepted the way I am. I dont see the need to keep another human being happy. Its their own job to do that. We have our occassional disagreements but we get along just fine.

4062

Posts

EW MASTER

Latest post on 12 April 2013 - 10:49

When I was just the girlfriend I tried really hard to keep my future MIL happy and she was horrid to me. She never missed an opportunity to point out what I did wrong (everything) and was awful. However, since becoming the gatekeeper to her grandchildren I've been able to put my foot down and no longer bother trying to keep her happy.

489

Posts

EW EXPLORER

Latest post on 12 April 2013 - 10:32

I think living in different countries, especially in different continents helps a lot. Then you'll only see each other once or twice a year and that's it. It will be different I guess when I have kids, but for now, that's how it's working out. I don't like the fact that she gets tickets to visit us before consulting with us before and sometimes she even goes, uninvited, on vacation with us, but since I don't want to create any problems, I just put up with it. But I'd never like to live in the same country as her though.

455

Posts

EW EXPLORER

Latest post on 11 April 2013 - 18:24

I know this is a universal problem but being a first hand witness to wonderful DIL n MIL relationships in quite a few families, iv deduced that like in any relationship peace n love only comes when BOTH sides make an effort , and its not impossible. I hope these articles are of benefit and helpful, in sha Allah. http://productivemuslim.com/striving-to-achieve-a-productive-and-peaceful-relationship-with-your-mother-in-law-part-1/ http://productivemuslim.com/striving-to-achieve-a-productive-and-peaceful-relationship-with-your-mother-in-law-part-2/

kiwispiers15400

2782

Posts

EW EXPERT

Latest post on 11 April 2013 - 18:22

Don't criticise or complain about your husband in front of her, accept her advice and decide later whether or not you will follow it, follow her house rules in her house even if they are stupid, try not to be jealous of the special relationship she has with your husband. I have a little boy now who I absolutely adore and it gives me a much better insight into why MILs can be overbearing, your husband will always be their precious little boy and so long as they think he is just as precious to you you will be on the same team, rather than rivals. My MIL and I disagree on many points, and probably both bite our tongues a lot but I actually love her, she is part of my family and is the reason my husband is the man I chose to marry.

70

Posts

EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 11 April 2013 - 18:10

I've gone through different stages regarding how I feel about my mil and how happy she appears with me. For a long while I was annoyed and frustrated by her as she is very different from my parents and has a very different (and narrow) view of the world. Then I realised that actually, she was fine - different, yes- but compared to many mils she was great. Then Christmas happened! On Christmas Day, while out with friends at a brunch she decided to criticise my husband for a couple of financial decisions that we made 5 years ago amongst other things and really upset him. She also let slip what she thought about me which in itself wasn't a problem but it just showed how little she knew me. I have been with dh for 18 years. So not feeling very charitable towards the old bat so much now :) And it goes on! Now it looks like instead of staying in their house for a week in the summer with them, we will be staying in a caravan! Admittedly, they offered to pay and to be honest i think it will be easier. However, there is a small part of me that is hugely offended! But that's more me being bl00dy minded. Thank you for letting me rant :) Eta : I realise that all io have done is rant and not really answered the op's question. I guess the answer now is that I don't really care as much as I did. If she can't be bothered to get to know me after all this time, why should I care. I am polite and try to be a pleasant and friendly as I can manage but I have stopped worrying what she thinks. <em>edited by Pancake on 11/04/2013</em>

214

Posts

EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 11 April 2013 - 17:08

my MIL is just fantastic, and i adore her. But now my due date is fast approaching for the birth of my first child, i feel things are getting tricky. We are from different countries, continents, cultures - and my MIL gives the impression that only people here know how to raise kids and birth babies. She has been 'offering' lots of advice which i find to be completely absurd and ridiculous, and rather than saying NO to her face, i just smile and say inshAllah. But she doesn't seem to be taking the hint :s When i first found out i was pregnant, she told me to drink fresh UNPASTEURIZED cows milk to make the baby strong, when i checked all the medical/pregnancy/baby websites ALL of them said this causes miscarriages. When i told her, she said "RUBBISH! All the bedouins here do it and we have fine strong healthy babies." My husband doesn't like to get in the middle and asked me if i would be willing to compromise on certain things but why should i? She had all her kids, raised them as she wanted, this is my baby and ill raise her as i want also. Especially when the advice i'm being offered is not only junk but dangerous! We've never had unkind words or any arguments or falling outs, but i don't know what will happen when the baby is born. Bear in mind we all live together! i try to be as respectful as i can, i've never refused anything, just say inshAllah and hope she'll take the hint. So we'll see :) BUT apart from all that, she's just fantastic. Always takes my side against anything or anyone else, makes all the food i love, sends her maid to help me if she thought i looked tired, always buys me gifts, gold, clothes, etc. We get on famously! Just dreading the birth and how it will be afterwards! Prayers please :) Will your husband ask you to compromise if his mother wants to take your baby out without a car seat? You need to tell him to start getting involved, it can be done in a diplomatic way. GL with your delivery.

179

Posts

EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 11 April 2013 - 16:46

my MIL is just fantastic, and i adore her. But now my due date is fast approaching for the birth of my first child, i feel things are getting tricky. We are from different countries, continents, cultures - and my MIL gives the impression that only people here know how to raise kids and birth babies. She has been 'offering' lots of advice which i find to be completely absurd and ridiculous, and rather than saying NO to her face, i just smile and say inshAllah. But she doesn't seem to be taking the hint :s When i first found out i was pregnant, she told me to drink fresh UNPASTEURIZED cows milk to make the baby strong, when i checked all the medical/pregnancy/baby websites ALL of them said this causes miscarriages. When i told her, she said "RUBBISH! All the bedouins here do it and we have fine strong healthy babies." My husband doesn't like to get in the middle and asked me if i would be willing to compromise on certain things but why should i? She had all her kids, raised them as she wanted, this is my baby and ill raise her as i want also. Especially when the advice i'm being offered is not only junk but dangerous! We've never had unkind words or any arguments or falling outs, but i don't know what will happen when the baby is born. Bear in mind we all live together! i try to be as respectful as i can, i've never refused anything, just say inshAllah and hope she'll take the hint. So we'll see :) BUT apart from all that, she's just fantastic. Always takes my side against anything or anyone else, makes all the food i love, sends her maid to help me if she thought i looked tired, always buys me gifts, gold, clothes, etc. We get on famously! Just dreading the birth and how it will be afterwards! Prayers please :)

Anonymous (not verified)

0

Posts

EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 11 April 2013 - 14:23

I don't have a MIL (will have one soon though) and our communication won't be easy. We simple don't speak each others language (my Arabic is close to zero lol), plus we will be quite far away in different countries. Anyone had this kind of language barrier with in laws? Marroosh, yes I was in this situation for many years, and I smiled and nodded a lot. A Scottish friend of mine who could speak Farsi fluently told me that whatever you do, don't learn to speak the language, else you will find yourself in the middle of lots of situations that you wish you weren't, and when I learned to speak my husbands language I realised what she said was absolutely true ;) edited by Alismum on 11/04/2013 Really? lol. Well I will have to learn Arabic properly as I want our future kids to be fluent. Of course Dh will speak Arabic with them, but I will be living in a place where Arabic is the accepted language, not like here where everyone speaks English. You will pick up Arabic in no time then. Have a look at Youtube for learning Arabic, there are lots of good and easy videos. When my little boy was studying for his last exams he revised from Youtube, and he got an A* for Arabic, I am very proud of him since none of us speak Arabic much. I have learned some Arabic from the youtube videos myself as well whilst studying with my son and already picked up a bit of vocabulary, and I can read a bit as well (although not understand what I'm reading if that makes sense). I never had any problems with my MIL (bless her she's gone now), and I was accepted into the family very well, so I guess I am very lucky and consider myself very fortunate indeed. edited by Alismum on 11/04/2013 I do study Arabic, but this is really Quran and Islam related. Future DH knows the task that lies ahead lol. I hope I will be able to build a respectful relationship with MIL, she is my DH mom after all and I would want him to be good to my mom as well.

Anonymous (not verified)

0

Posts

EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 11 April 2013 - 14:13

I guess it depends upon the woman, but my MiL is great. My husband is the eldest son and so I have a lot of family responsibilities. I try very hard to be fair, make good decisions and do the best for the family and the future. I am always respectful and never go against her wishes. I always try to do things for her so she can rest - she has certainly earned it raising a large and busy family. She loves to sit and drink tea and chat or go out for ice cream so we spend lots of time doing that. Having said that my first MiL was a tyrant and destroyed my marriage to my first husband. There was nothing I did that she approved of. According to her I was a terrible wife, mother, house keeper, and person; she was critical, rude, and never, in 7 years of marriage, remembered my name. Some people you just can't please. I should have stopped trying when I first realised I couldn't please her instead of wearing myself to the bone trying to please her.

45

Posts

EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 11 April 2013 - 14:05

It's not always easy. Be respectful, reasonable and don't get angry. Your marriage will benefit from it. If she's not the same back, speak to your partner, but make clear you will continue to try your best. He'll respect you for it and stand up for you as necessary.

1443

Posts

EW OLDHAND

Latest post on 11 April 2013 - 13:40

I don't have a MIL (will have one soon though) and our communication won't be easy. We simple don't speak each others language (my Arabic is close to zero lol), plus we will be quite far away in different countries. Anyone had this kind of language barrier with in laws? Marroosh, yes I was in this situation for many years, and I smiled and nodded a lot. A Scottish friend of mine who could speak Farsi fluently told me that whatever you do, don't learn to speak the language, else you will find yourself in the middle of lots of situations that you wish you weren't, and when I learned to speak my husbands language I realised what she said was absolutely true ;) edited by Alismum on 11/04/2013 Really? lol. Well I will have to learn Arabic properly as I want our future kids to be fluent. Of course Dh will speak Arabic with them, but I will be living in a place where Arabic is the accepted language, not like here where everyone speaks English. You will pick up Arabic in no time then. Have a look at Youtube for learning Arabic, there are lots of good and easy videos. When my little boy was studying for his last exams he revised from Youtube, and he got an A* for Arabic, I am very proud of him since none of us speak Arabic much. I have learned some Arabic from the youtube videos myself as well whilst studying with my son and already picked up a bit of vocabulary, and I can read a bit as well (although not understand what I'm reading if that makes sense). I never had any problems with my MIL (bless her she's gone now), and I was accepted into the family very well, so I guess I am very lucky and consider myself very fortunate indeed. <em>edited by Alismum on 11/04/2013</em>

Anonymous (not verified)

0

Posts

EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 11 April 2013 - 13:05

I don't have a MIL (will have one soon though) and our communication won't be easy. We simple don't speak each others language (my Arabic is close to zero lol), plus we will be quite far away in different countries. Anyone had this kind of language barrier with in laws? Marroosh, yes I was in this situation for many years, and I smiled and nodded a lot. A Scottish friend of mine who could speak Farsi fluently told me that whatever you do, don't learn to speak the language, else you will find yourself in the middle of lots of situations that you wish you weren't, and when I learned to speak my husbands language I realised what she said was absolutely true ;) edited by Alismum on 11/04/2013 Really? lol. Well I will have to learn Arabic properly as I want our future kids to be fluent. Of course Dh will speak Arabic with them, but I will be living in a place where Arabic is the accepted language, not like here where everyone speaks English.

1443

Posts

EW OLDHAND

Latest post on 11 April 2013 - 13:00

I don't have a MIL (will have one soon though) and our communication won't be easy. We simple don't speak each others language (my Arabic is close to zero lol), plus we will be quite far away in different countries. Anyone had this kind of language barrier with in laws? Marroosh, yes I was in this situation for many years, and I smiled and nodded a lot. A Scottish friend of mine who could speak Farsi fluently told me that whatever you do, don't learn to speak the language, else you will find yourself in the middle of lots of situations that you wish you weren't, and when I learned to speak my husbands language I realised what she said was absolutely true ;) <em>edited by Alismum on 11/04/2013</em>

1236

Posts

EW OLDHAND

Latest post on 11 April 2013 - 12:38

I don't have a MIL (will have one soon though) and our communication won't be easy. We simple don't speak each others language (my Arabic is close to zero lol), plus we will be quite far away in different countries. Anyone had this kind of language barrier with in laws? Plus, I notice, there are many stories about MILs. I never seen any stories about DIL or SIL. Can't imagine it's always the MIL who's being difficult:) I think,and especially in case when you marry someone from a different religion or culture, you have to be aware of the family dynamics. Men from some backgrounds will simply not "stand up" against parents, or will have the expectation of you to be the one to give give give if you know what I mean (Suck it up and be quiet) As for myself, I will make more effort to have some kind of relationship with my future MIL as far as that is possible. Where the future DH is from, the mother is the most loved and respected in the family, and I know she will always be an important part of his life and if she needs him he will be there, even though I might not always like it or agree with it. Very true re cultural issues. My MIL came from a background where "mother" was in charge and assumed a matriarchal role when our DD was born. This is now, and was even back in the 70s deemed to be old fashioned and rather Victorian but having said that, there are men who still wouldn't dare stand up to their mothers. My DH wasn't rude to his mum in spite of my expression of "tearing strips off her" but made it clear that the way we as a couple decided to raise our children was up to us and that she as a grandmother had no right to interfere.

414

Posts

EW EXPLORER

Latest post on 11 April 2013 - 12:38

well it depends if u care to have any sort of relationship, and vice versa.With some ppl u can only be civil.

Anonymous (not verified)

0

Posts

EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 11 April 2013 - 12:22

I don't have a MIL (will have one soon though) and our communication won't be easy. We simple don't speak each others language (my Arabic is close to zero lol), plus we will be quite far away in different countries. Anyone had this kind of language barrier with in laws? Plus, I notice, there are many stories about MILs. I never seen any stories about DIL or SIL. Can't imagine it's always the MIL who's being difficult:) I think,and especially in case when you marry someone from a different religion or culture, you have to be aware of the family dynamics. Men from some backgrounds will simply not "stand up" against parents, or will have the expectation of you to be the one to give give give if you know what I mean (Suck it up and be quiet) As for myself, I will make more effort to have some kind of relationship with my future MIL as far as that is possible. Where the future DH is from, the mother is the most loved and respected in the family, and I know she will always be an important part of his life and if she needs him he will be there, even though I might not always like it or agree with it.

1236

Posts

EW OLDHAND

Latest post on 11 April 2013 - 12:11

Speaking as a DIL and fairly new MIL of almost 5 years, I think it works both ways. Mutual respect is the key and I would say that I am very fond of my lovely SIL and respect him as my DD's life partner. When I first met my MIL and FIL I was nervous but their warmth and friendly welcome relaxed me. Of course we had our moments over the years, usually with differing views on child rearing but I always prevailed LOL!! My best friend who sadly died last summer was never liked by her MIL, why? because she realised very early on that she couldn't control her DIL the way she controlled her own DDs. I would say, be yourself, be respectful and friendly. There's not much that you can do if your MIL doesn't like you but that's where I'd insist that your DH takes your side, every time! On one occasion when my children were very young, I did have an argument with my MIL which resulted in me leaving her house and going home, taking the children with me. She phoned my DH at work to complain and then he called me. Told him what had happened and he went to his parents house after work and tore strips off his mother! She apologised to me and that was it. She was otherwise a wonderful MIL and I cried buckets when she died 18 months ago. <em>edited by JoyceB on 11/04/2013</em>

dogcatcher44047

461

Posts

EW EXPLORER

Latest post on 11 April 2013 - 10:12

@keights....my in laws seem quite similar to yours. My family is very loving, outgoing and hands on. We can fight, argue and get over it. We kiss, hug, touch, wrestle and play silly games like still hiding on people and scaring them. That definitely doesn't happen with the in laws. It's been interesting for my kids though. They see the crazy side of my family who as my daughter says if they haven't face booked, called or I messaged at least once a day we wonder what's wrong. They also see the reserved, keep quiet, keep it to yourself family. I think they're very balanced having both. I still go crazy, especially with a rotten sister inlaw but I tune her out. I have plenty of sisters and don't need a nasty sister inlaw.

96

Posts

EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 11 April 2013 - 09:54

I've been married for more than 20 yrs and in the early days my relationship with my inlaws was quite difficult for me.We are very different types of people,my family was very open and could show their emotions and discuss opinions easily but my MIL was the opposite.I soon learned not to tell her too much as it was usually met with disaproval and changing the subject and it was impossible to engender any closeness.I know she dotes on her three sons and grandchildren but she doesen't really show her feelings and she isn't a generous or giving person in any sense,she never bought my DD even a tiny gift when she was a baby or since (not hard up) which said more than just about money and more importantly she can never say anything kind or complementary.I have always treated her with kindness and respect and paid her little genuine compliments,partly because thats my nature and partly to encourage her :) However we have reached a kind of equallibrium where I know what to say and what to expect and largely don't get too involved with her.To build a relationship with someone,they have to be prepared to meet you half way and sometimes you you can't please people,they are the way they are for they're own reasons and as derian says you just have to do your own thing.

1575

Posts

EW EXPERT

Latest post on 11 April 2013 - 09:14

I don't even try to keep her happy. She never will be anyway. I just do my own thing

117

Posts

EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 11 April 2013 - 07:36

It really depends. As long as you are respectful and treat them well, they should do the same thing. However, in my case it is different. My MIL is from the US and I am not. I always had the impression that people from western societies were more tolerant when it comes to giving more personal space. At least this is what I thought as in my culture it is very common for MIL to live in the same house as the children and therefore they are constantly in your face. Slowly I realized that her "kindness" was overwhelming and that she wanted to "connect" with my husband at any giving opportunity. It turns out that her husband is not much of a talker. So she decided to tell all her problems, news etc to my husband that she should really be discussing with her husband. It then started to have an effect on my husband as it would stress him out. She also forced gifts on us that her friends gave her. Only for her to harass us months later because we have not kept in touch with her friends and thanked them over and over again! So my husband decided to put his foot down and told her that she should respect boundaries and that he does not want her to get involved in certain things. She finally understood and changed since then. Sometimes you just need to tell them in case they cross the line. I found honesty to be the best way to deal with things. Having said that, make sure, you and your husband are always on the same page and that he has your back!

dogcatcher44047

461

Posts

EW EXPLORER

Latest post on 11 April 2013 - 07:12

My MIL really cared for me but worked me over hard. I was young so I did what she said and wanted. I actually didnt realize I was getting worked over until I watched the other sister in laws not doing what I was doing. Ugh, that didnt make me happy. I slowly pulled away and moved away. She's realized I'm a good wife and good mother. She still has her say but I don't think twice anymore. I had to tell me husband early on in our marriage that he didnt have to tell his mother everything we did in our home. He eventually listened and learned to keep something private. I've been around for over 20 years. I don't walk on egg shells. I love staying with my in laws when we go home....but not for long. I'm older so I see the cup as half full. My MIL has taught me a lot and I'm thankful for her wisdom. She taught me more than my mother and at times has cared for me more than my mother. I will be very sad when she's no longer around. So, the trick to keeping her happy....give a little ( time, communication, love, patience, understanding, patience, patience) <em>edited by dogcatcher on 11/04/2013</em>

565

Posts

EW GURU

Latest post on 11 April 2013 - 04:04

It depends on the MIL! I think everyone should be happy if you're genuine and respectful with them. It also depends on your background/culture. How close is the husband to the family, physically and relationship wise.

Log in to post new content in the forum.

ON EXPATWOMAN TODAY

Top online British and US High Schools in the UAE: CambriLearn

Back-to-School, Reimagined: How UAE Families Are Choosing a Smarter Start to the School Year

Top 10 Low Cost Airlines in the UAE

Top 10 Most Affordable Budget Airlines in the UAE For Your Next Trip

Top Nursery School Kids Summer Camps in Dubai 2025

Embark on a Summer Adventure at Kids First Group Universe!

Dubai Expat Resident Receives Commemorate Passport Stamp After 60 Years

Dubai Expat Resident Receives Commemorate Passport Stamp After 60 Years

Top 5 UK curriculum online schools for expat families and kids abroad

Top 5 Online Schools For Expat Families in the Middle East

UAE Breaks Heat Record With 51.6°C - Here’s How to Stay Safe and Sane This Summer

UAE Breaks Heat Record With 51.6°C - Here’s How to Stay Safe and Sane This Summer

Best educational summer camps for teenagers in Dubai: MDX Summer Camps

Experience Summer Learning at its Best with MDX Study Camps at Middlesex University Dubai

Hidden Costs of Expat Life in Dubai (and How to Outsmart Them)

Hidden Costs of Expat Life in Dubai (and How to Outsmart Them)

Real Madrid World Dubai - Summer Offer AED 199 per ticket

Real Madrid World is Celebrating World Football Day With AED 199 Tickets

Scholarship opportunities at the Swiss international Scientific School Dubai (SISD)

Dubai IB School's Class of 2025 Secures Over $10 Million in University Scholarships

Travel influencer academy in Dubai

Dubai Just Launched a Travel Influencer Academy

Central Bank of UAE reveals new official currency symbol for the Emirati dirham

UAE Unveils New Official Dirham Symbol, Inspired By the Country's Flag

His Highness Sheikh Mohammed announces 3 best UAE government departments

Pictured: His Highness Sheikh Mohammed at a UAE Cabinet meeting.

H.H Sheikh Mohammed Ranks 3 Best & Worst UAE Government Departments

New 10-Year UAE Residency Visa for Dubai Content Creators and Influencers

There's a 10-Year UAE Residency Visa for Dubai Content Creators and Influencers

UAE president announces 2025 will be the 'Year of Community' in the emirates

Confirmed: 2025 Will Be The 'Year of Community' in The UAE

Breakfast with penguins at Ski Dubai Mall of the Emirates

You Can Now Enjoy Breakfast With Penguins in Dubai

How to convert another country's drivers license in Dubai

How to Convert a Non-UAE Driving License in Dubai: A Complete Guide

Registrations open for EYFS curriculum Willow Children's Nursery in Dubai

Where to Choose the Best EYFS Children's Nursery in Dubai Marina

List of confirmed UAE public holidays in 2025

List of UAE Public Holidays in 2025: Announced and Expected Dates

Outdoor cinemas in Dubai for the winter season 2024

The Best Outdoor Cinemas in Dubai to See Open-Air Movies This Winter

Executive Hospitality Programme at South View School in Dubai

Introducing the Executive Hospitality Programme at South View School Dubai

Expat legal consultants in the UAE | Dr. Hassan Elhais

Meet Dr. Hassan Elhais: A Pillar of Legal Expertise for Expats in the UAE

Saray Spa promotions at JW Marriott Marquis Hotel Dubai

This Luxury Dubai Spa Has Some of the Very Best Breaks To Escape To

A Complete Guide How to Get an Influencer License in Dubai and UAE

How to Get a UAE Influencer License: Step-By-Step Guide & Requirements

UAE Emirati Lawyer Awatif Khouri in Dubai and Abu Dhabi

Meet the Emirati Woman Breaking Grounds in UAE Law: Awatif Khouri

Dubai's gravity-driven tunnel to reduce flood risks by 700%

Pictured: Flooded roads from the record-breaking storm that hit Dubai in April 2024.

Dubai Flood Risk to Be Cut Down by 700% With New Tunnel

8 Beauty Treatments in Dubai for busy moms

8 Beauty Treatments in Dubai: Self-Care Recommendations for Busy Moms

Mashreq NEO NXT Account | Why Kids and Teens Need Financial Education

Why Teens Need Real-World Financial Education?

E-scooters are no longer banned on the Dubai Metro stations and trains

RTA Finally Lifts E-Scooter Ban From Dubai Metro

Spa packages at Saray Spa in JW Marriott Marquis Hotel Dubai

Step Into the Ultimate Relaxation Bliss With Saray Spa's Pampering Packages

How to book Dubai taxi through WhatsApp

Booking Taxis in Dubai: How to Hail a Taxi Through WhatsApp

Experience Extended Stays and Special Savings at Le Meridien Al Aqah Beach Resort UAE

Soak Up the Summer With the Ultimate UAE Staycation Special

RTA Dubai flying taxi official launch date

Image credit: Joby Aviation.

RTA Finally Confirms Launch Date of Dubai's Flying Taxis