Dear Dubai....I am divorcing you.....

Good luck to you. I am hoping for the same. Too expensive for us to live here, hard to tell kids we can't afford Kidzania or SkiDubai etc etc. Also, need to live a little, because we can't here because I was born Muslim eventhough I ain't really a follower, I get dragged into things by law, not by choice. Gosh, I'd like to walk into a bottle store and choose my OWN wine...simple pleasure ;-) Can't you do a legal name change? Sure I can, but what for? Our time here in Dubai is limited but a name change could be forever. Dubai isn't worth changing who I am. I'll put up with it for as long as I have to, but am actively searching for a way out.

Erm, I made us move to dxb even though himself is the earner. I think we may be the only people alive who actively sought to move here. (Have a love affair with deserts don't you know) I find it hard to remember some times that this is not a forever home, and that it's when we move on, not if. And when we do move on it won't be home, but somewhere else. For sure there are frustrations in living here (and as a note while I remember, has anyone tried being an immigrant anywhere else? some places make the red tape here look like a picnic in the park) and I took the OP's post to be a cheeky fare thee well to those frustrations. personally, I will be leaving with regret as I do love this place: I love my life, my friends, our desert, I love the way women come together when there is need, I love staying at home, I love the opportunity that gives me to explore my life as an artist, the chances I have to try new things and grow, to learn about different cultures, politics, religions. Ask me again in the middle of summer when I am cooped up with a hot and cranky daughter and that will be when the frustrations of living here have me in their grip and I find it hard to remember all that I do love about this place, when all the inequalities, eniquities seem to thump me about the head and make me want to scream.

I have to say, I can relate to most of the points the OP raised and I too have been very close to divorcing Dubai..in saying that I never chose to commit to it fully as I have a long standing love affair with my own country! After a few years however, finding along the way some amazing friends who have been like my family here, I gave in and decided to try and at least ‘like’ Dubai. I have accepted that I am not a lifer and accepting the place makes life here a lot easier. People’s perceptions of Dubai interest me. I still find I am naturally suspicious of and question anyone who loves this place TOO much…As to me it is not a place to be forever, but a place to earn some good cash, lead an exciting life and set yourself up for a better life elsewhere. But that’s just my view! And I those who have really taken to Dubai will not agree with me. I think people’s perceptions of Dubai all comes down to their ‘previous’ life and what they valued. I value having my family down the road, day to day simplicity, naturally beautiful surroundings, the freedom to speak and act as I please and the right to privacy. Things money cannot buy and Dubai can not offer me. Hence why my time here has a use by date. I do see the positives of Dubai though and understand why people love it, however its interesting to read the various views. For example someone who had to work to the bone in their previous country, juggle a job and multiple kids and **** weather seem more likely to enjoy the perks of Dubai such as cheap maids and nannies and year round sunshine. Some are lucky enough to be housewives while their husband earns a living and they can therefore go to these coffee mornings and enjoy a fairly stress free life. Who would want to give up a gig like that? Whereas those who work hard, those who haven’t been lucky enough to make quality friends here and those who value simpler things like I mentioned above many find they struggle a bit with Dubai. So I guess we shouldn’t slate people for Dubai bashing as we don’t know where they came from and why they haven’t taken to it as easily as others. Maybe they don’t have it as good as many of you do here? I know I would appreciate this place a lot more if I could wake up when I wanted each day, go to yoga class, drink coffee and swan about at the beach?! Overall, I think forums should encourage all forms of feedback both positive and negative. Heaven knows I get tired of everything in the news being all ‘Dubai is wonderful and positive’ when it isn’t always true. A little bit of negative keeps us all in check with reality after all :)

When I moved here, I had also agreed to 4 years tops of living here. Had my dh not been laid off we would have been living here for who knows how long. The thing is I was against moving here from the get go. But my dh had a nosy friend who landed him a job over here. Of course the money was hard to say no to. He moved over here first. What he neglected to tell me was the company renigged on some of the benefit offers, housing suddenly sky rocketed (so the package being offered was completely under the current market rates for things). And we found ourselves in a position we weren't prepared to be in. But we made the best of it. At times I feel we sold our souls to the devil just to chase the money. At the end of it all, we are leaving here with enough money to survive on for several years until we find our next place in life. Was it worth it? I don't think so. I think we lost a lot along the way. Do I hate Dubai? No I don't. I don't think Dubai was for me. I think for me it will be a place to visit again in the future, but nothing more than that. I think we got what we could out of our experiences here. We certainly didn't live it up here by any means. I am glad to be leaving at the end of the month. But Dubai will always hold a place in my heart. And it isn't all negative.

Bah. What was initially mutually agreed to be a three year adventure in the Middle East before returning to the US has turned into a four year stay with a 99% confirmed relocation to Singapore next year because "he who makes the money makes the decision." Oh, I'm not protesting you, I'm just mildly amused at that I've turned into a trailing corporate expat wife. I suppose I'll have to do a Freckles and put on a bright smile and make the best of it. That said, the decision to relocate was a MUTUAL one; I baulk at the phrase 'we followed our husbands to Dubai' when in my case at least, we decided, [i'>together[/i'>, to make the move. We saw it as an adventure, another chapter in our lives together, and our relocation wasn't made because DH was unable to find work elsewhere!

There is a slight irony in this thread. "We" followed our husbands to Dubai, no? How many of us would be here if our husbands hadn't landed jobs here or been relocated here? Some of the attitudes on this thread imply that it was the personal decision of everyone to come to Dubai when it's not really the case and there are unhappy women in Dubai who feel trapped here because it's the only place where their husbands can find work at the moment. It's not so easy for some of the "moaners" to just up and leave. Fair point; I wouldn't be here unless DH had been enticed. And it's also fair to point out that we would not have moved here unless the inducements on the table hadn't been very attractive indeed. That said, the decision to relocate was a MUTUAL one; I baulk at the phrase 'we followed our husbands to Dubai' when in my case at least, we decided, [i'>together[/i'>, to make the move. We saw it as an adventure, another chapter in our lives together, and our relocation wasn't made because DH was unable to find work elsewhere! However, I also take your point there are a lot of unhappy women here and that many of the 'moaners' cannot simply up and leave. But just because I am happy here and am thriving in this environment doesn't mean that I have 'decided' to don rose-coloured glasses, nor that I have some skewed view of what brought us here in the first place. ;)

Anyway, if there is no chance of good employment in one's home country, then one is better off here despite some of the negative aspects.

There is a slight irony in this thread. "We" followed our husbands to Dubai, no? How many of us would be here if our husbands hadn't landed jobs here or been relocated here? Some of the attitudes on this thread imply that it was the personal decision of everyone to come to Dubai when it's not really the case and there are unhappy women in Dubai who feel trapped here because it's the only place where their husbands can find work at the moment. It's not so easy for some of the "moaners" to just up and leave.

Good luck to you. I am hoping for the same. Too expensive for us to live here, hard to tell kids we can't afford Kidzania or SkiDubai etc etc. Also, need to live a little, because we can't here because I was born Muslim eventhough I ain't really a follower, I get dragged into things by law, not by choice. Gosh, I'd like to walk into a bottle store and choose my OWN wine...simple pleasure ;-) Can't you do a legal name change?

Forgot to add in my earlier post-whatever your reasons for moving I hope the move goes well and you are happier in your next home. Wishing you a smooth and safe journey.

Thought the original post was quite toungue in cheek but exposed an underlying bitterness. I might not agree with some of her views but those are her views based on her experiences. Its not the same for everyone. Perhaps the OP is leaving on a low note. We all go through phases when everything looks bleak! Honestly, I could have written this post last year, but since I quit work, I am really enjoying Dubai (had the year from **** last year). I also LOVED Dubai when I loved my job (think 2006 to 2009). We are probably moving home this year to try our luck at starting something that has potential. Initially I was so happy about the move (because life was miserable here) but now I am very ambivalent about it. Good Luck Mamaballs. I moving home makes you much happier than when you were here.

Would you say that it gets better as time goes on? It helps to get family over for visits too. To be honest, it was never THAT hard to start with. Being homesick for family/friends is manageable for us (we talk to them daily via email/IM), but it will hit others harder. You are right, having family over was nice (but was happy to boot them out of here after 2 weeks :D). Living here has given my mother and brother the chance to visit 2 countries that they would have NEVER visited before, that's worth a lot to me too.

Dubai most certainly has its ups and downs...but so does every other place on earth. If I was unhappy here I would plan my exit and leave. But I would realize that its never about the place, its about what we as people make of it..and I would realize that I had failed in that particular instance. No need to pour my negative energy onto others, I would think of the good in that place, be thankful and move on - Then everyone's happy :D Amen! :)

I would like to leave Dubai but not because of Dubai, only because I didn't find a job here. If I have a job here, I would be very happy to stay here. What I prefer in Dubai is the presence of so many different cultures.

I wonder how many people move back home and then regret leaving Dubai? You don't know what you've got till it's gone... We are here on a decent (by current economic standards I would say great) package and no, not everything is perfect. I spend 80% of my time at home, have only 1 full day with husband and kids to relax, have only a couple friends, etc. I miss my family, home cooking from my parents, the convenience of knowing how to do things and where to get them done, etc. But I am grateful for the opportunities and experiences that Dubai has afforded our family (not just economic). Knowing how my friends and family are struggling back home, I know we are extremely lucky. Personally I'm looking forward to my 1 year anniversary with Dubai. :D Would you say that it gets better as time goes on? It helps to get family over for visits too. Why take your family over for visits when you can leave them to rot in a cold drab country and bank the money for yourself?Idont believe that Gleekys family live in a cold drab country.

I wonder how many people move back home and then regret leaving Dubai? You don't know what you've got till it's gone... We are here on a decent (by current economic standards I would say great) package and no, not everything is perfect. I spend 80% of my time at home, have only 1 full day with husband and kids to relax, have only a couple friends, etc. I miss my family, home cooking from my parents, the convenience of knowing how to do things and where to get them done, etc. But I am grateful for the opportunities and experiences that Dubai has afforded our family (not just economic). Knowing how my friends and family are struggling back home, I know we are extremely lucky. Personally I'm looking forward to my 1 year anniversary with Dubai. :D Would you say that it gets better as time goes on? It helps to get family over for visits too. Why take your family over for visits when you can leave them to rot in a cold drab country and bank the money for yourself?

Dubai most certainly has its ups and downs...but so does every other place on earth. If I was unhappy here I would plan my exit and leave. But I would realize that its never about the place, its about what we as people make of it..and I would realize that I had failed in that particular instance. No need to pour my negative energy onto others, I would think of the good in that place, be thankful and move on - Then everyone's happy :D

I wonder how many people move back home and then regret leaving Dubai? You don't know what you've got till it's gone... We are here on a decent (by current economic standards I would say great) package and no, not everything is perfect. I spend 80% of my time at home, have only 1 full day with husband and kids to relax, have only a couple friends, etc. I miss my family, home cooking from my parents, the convenience of knowing how to do things and where to get them done, etc. But I am grateful for the opportunities and experiences that Dubai has afforded our family (not just economic). Knowing how my friends and family are struggling back home, I know we are extremely lucky. Personally I'm looking forward to my 1 year anniversary with Dubai. :D Would you say that it gets better as time goes on? It helps to get family over for visits too.

We are here on a decent (by current economic standards I would say great) package and no, not everything is perfect. I spend 80% of my time at home, have only 1 full day with husband and kids to relax, have only a couple friends, etc. I miss my family, home cooking from my parents, the convenience of knowing how to do things and where to get them done, etc. But I am grateful for the opportunities and experiences that Dubai has afforded our family (not just economic). Knowing how my friends and family are struggling back home, I know we are extremely lucky. Personally I'm looking forward to my 1 year anniversary with Dubai. couldn't have expressed better gleekfamily :)

its a mixed culture here.you will get each and every type of person,some rude some bad,some have courtsey others not. as for leaving dubai its mamaballs decision and she is leaving so be it...why others have to comment on her? try and be happy whereever you live...here or back home..

I wonder how many people move back home and then regret leaving Dubai? You don't know what you've got till it's gone... We are here on a decent (by current economic standards I would say great) package and no, not everything is perfect. I spend 80% of my time at home, have only 1 full day with husband and kids to relax, have only a couple friends, etc. I miss my family, home cooking from my parents, the convenience of knowing how to do things and where to get them done, etc. But I am grateful for the opportunities and experiences that Dubai has afforded our family (not just economic). Knowing how my friends and family are struggling back home, I know we are extremely lucky. Personally I'm looking forward to my 1 year anniversary with Dubai. :D

Hats off for anyone who can live in a grey cold country and pay heaps in taxes and still not complain. Anyway, good luck Mamaballs. I am sure you would be happier once you are at home. You know, I wish for Mamaballs I could agree with that comment however, I have found with my dealings people who are able to see such negativity around them tend to find it everywhere they go.... Not true. I hated living in Dubai. I couldn’t be happier now. Not everyone is going to like Dubai but it dosent mean you wont be happy somewhere else. Hats off to anyone who can stand living in 40 degree heat for 6 months of the year. Did you leave your family in that cold, grey country?

MamaBalls I liked your post, Took it as a tongue in cheek goodbye to all and made me smile :) Mentioned most things that the majority of people post about and did it in a humorous way. Good luck with your move xxx

This thread is a good indication of what life in Dubai is really like. Really, I thought her post was funny but it appears that life in Dubai makes you bitter and defensive. Wuffles, has found her happy place you can tell by her posts shes happy and content others seem to like to belittle posters at any given opportunity. Maybe Mamaballs has had enough and wants to find her happy place, at least shes doing something about it. I agree, you only have to look at EW on a daily basis to see the bitterness, anger and frustrations felt by many.

I sincerely wish you a smooth move and much happiness mamaballs. I do appreciate you sharing your feelings and your stance of your time Dubai even though others do not agree. I hope your next journey in life is enjoyable and productive take care

Hats off for anyone who can live in a grey cold country and pay heaps in taxes and still not complain. Anyway, good luck Mamaballs. I am sure you would be happier once you are at home. You know, I wish for Mamaballs I could agree with that comment however, I have found with my dealings people who are able to see such negativity around them tend to find it everywhere they go.... Not true. I hated living in Dubai. I couldn’t be happier now. Not everyone is going to like Dubai but it dosent mean you wont be happy somewhere else. Hats off to anyone who can stand living in 40 degree heat for 6 months of the year.

Making it work wherever you live has a lot to do with: a. asking for help b. making the best of your situation c. having a positive attitude None of which the OP seems to have done. Why make the best of a situation if you don't have too. Isn't that accepting second best? If you don't have to then great. If, like a lot of people, this is where your home is for the next few years (because there are few options anywhere else) then you buckle down and make the best of it. Dh has a job, kids are in a good school, we have a roof over hour heads. As the moment we have a lot to be grateful for. Not saying life is a bed of roses because it isn't but it could be a lot worse. It comes down to whether you see your glass half empty or half full

Making it work wherever you live has a lot to do with: a. asking for help b. making the best of your situation c. having a positive attitude None of which the OP seems to have done. I did all of it and probably the OP done the same. It's not a matter of you have not done enough. Some people like cheese some don't ! That's it. If you don't like cheese then don't buy it. Don't harp on about how much you don't like it Has she harped on about it? She did ONE post.

Making it work wherever you live has a lot to do with: a. asking for help b. making the best of your situation c. having a positive attitude None of which the OP seems to have done. Why make the best of a situation if you don't have too. Isn't that accepting second best? Because people should try to make the best of their situation.... You know, I've been to the UK a few times and never have I had someone say "no after you" unless I know them... I think a lot of people come to dubai from smaller suburbs or towns rather than big cities, and Dubai is just that a city.... Same in Sydney, Auckland, Brisbane, New York, Paris, LA, several cities in germany where I thought people were extremely rude.... people are just not as kind in those places....

Anyway, good luck Mamaballs. I am sure you would be happier once you are at home. You know, I wish for Mamaballs I could agree with that comment however, I have found with my dealings people who are able to see such negativity around them tend to find it everywhere they go.... Not true. I hated living in Dubai. I couldn’t be happier now. Not everyone is going to like Dubai but it dosent mean you wont be happy somewhere else. Hats off to anyone who can stand living in 40 degree heat for 6 months of the year.