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Do you allow your maid to sleep out?

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Al Quwatain51756

535

Posts

EW GURU

Latest post on 21 March 2012 - 09:46

If you want to see reality, then go and visit the maids in the holding cells at immigration and ask them what they did.....It is packed with them. Yes, but my point is that it is the Maid who ends up in the holding cell and not the Sponsor. Sometimes, but quite often the sponsor gets a ban (no more maids for them, like my friend has) and other times a fine.

1029

Posts

EW OLDHAND

Latest post on 19 March 2012 - 09:47

If you want to see reality, then go and visit the maids in the holding cells at immigration and ask them what they did.....It is packed with them. Yes, but my point is that it is the Maid who ends up in the holding cell and not the Sponsor.

2192

Posts

EW EXPERT

Latest post on 18 March 2012 - 21:55

Shocking ..!

Al Quwatain51756

535

Posts

EW GURU

Latest post on 18 March 2012 - 13:06

I know of 5 people who were investigated due to their maids night time antics. One of them was called to the police station in the middle of the night to collect theirs and they had to sign an undertaking that she would not be caught 'out' again in the dead of the night (I do not know what she was doing), and they then cancelled her visa and sent her home. Other ones have had all kinds of issues, from them working as loan sharks and taking peoples passports to hold, as well as running small businesses illegally. If these are not imbeciles then what are they? If you want to see reality, then go and visit the maids in the holding cells at immigration and ask them what they did.....It is packed with them.

1029

Posts

EW OLDHAND

Latest post on 18 March 2012 - 09:21

Yes, my maid is allowed to sleep out. She is 40 years old and I am not her mother! You need to be less complacent and start to understand your role as the sponsor of a female domestic worker. There are special laws in place, and these are for the protection of the maid. Should you not protect her, then you may find yourself in a sticky situation. I trust my Maid not to do stupid things when she is out in the big wide world - and I would not employ somebody that I could not trust. I love the way that you consider yourself to be "protecting your female domestic worker" (like she is some kind of imbecile) rather than the power trip of imposing a curfew on a grown woman as you do. Further, I know of two separate incidents where a Maid has come into trouble with the law here, and neither time was the Sponsor held accountable (in one of the cases the Maid was shop lifting, and in the other case the Maid had fallen pregnant, gone to the hospital and the hospital had alerted the police that she was unmarried). Facts. I am sure that when you rummage through all of your papers, you will find it written in black and white that the Sponsor is 100% responsible for the Maid, but in reality, the only time the police have exercised this law is when the Maid works for another family (so that they can slap the sponsor with a 50,000+ fine). Putting a curfew on a Maid (as you would a child) is utterly ridiculous and I refuse to do it. <em>edited by Tru Blu on 18/03/2012</em>

5452

Posts

EW MASTER

Latest post on 17 March 2012 - 12:18

well.... she left this evening... it was obvious she was lying... the more questions i was asking the more tales she told!! she now reckons she's going to work in some jewellery shop... i think she may have lied completely about the whole marriage thing - she just needed some time & money to sort herself out and muggins here fell for it! the day i mentioned that my husband was off to get the visa application done was the day she got all funny... i know i'm better off without her but i'm still disappointed about the whole thing :( back to square one then - so if anyone knows of a good, available maid - please let me know!!! I suppose this is one of the biggest disadvantages of hiring someone who is already in the country and on a visit visa. If things go wrong, she can just up and leave and there is nothing you can do about it. She will try the same thing with the next Madame and will repeat this until she finds a Madame who is ok with the maid having boyfriends. If it were possible to fire her and ban her, then she'd never try this one again.

180

Posts

EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 17 March 2012 - 11:38

Good luck maryam_kk - our first maid ever starts tomorrow so I will be keeping my fingers crossed. And thanks to everyone on here with such great advice.

80

Posts

EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 16 March 2012 - 21:02

well.... she left this evening... it was obvious she was lying... the more questions i was asking the more tales she told!! she now reckons she's going to work in some jewellery shop... i think she may have lied completely about the whole marriage thing - she just needed some time & money to sort herself out and muggins here fell for it! the day i mentioned that my husband was off to get the visa application done was the day she got all funny... i know i'm better off without her but i'm still disappointed about the whole thing :( back to square one then - so if anyone knows of a good, available maid - please let me know!!!

3804

Posts

EW MASTER

Latest post on 16 March 2012 - 14:40

we've not got as far as that... my hubby was off to the typist center this morning, but i told him to hold on... she is saying that her husband has forthotten the marriage certificatem, so she wiull ask her mother to send it... she has asked us to hold on until saturday... i dont know what to do... i feel hurt & upset... & confused... i don't like to feel that someone is making a fool out of me... i've been so flexibale... i'm actually really pi!!ssed off... My friend's live-in maid actually forged her marriage certificate! So be careful.

Al Quwatain51756

535

Posts

EW GURU

Latest post on 15 March 2012 - 13:15

Yes, my maid is allowed to sleep out. She is 40 years old and I am not her mother! You need to be less complacent and start to understand your role as the sponsor of a female domestic worker. There are special laws in place, and these are for the protection of the maid. Should you not protect her, then you may find yourself in a sticky situation.

Al Quwatain51756

535

Posts

EW GURU

Latest post on 15 March 2012 - 13:11

Maryam, get rid of her now, today, out, bags packed (and you pack them).....no warning, nothing. She threatened you if you were not going to let her sleep out. Who needs hassle like this, Tell her that her kind are a dime a dozen. Adios.

80

Posts

EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 15 March 2012 - 11:01

she is saying that she got married at 16... and didn;t get married in a church as you have to be over 18..,. so she says she has got (what i understand) a registry certificate of marriage...

1247

Posts

EW OLDHAND

Latest post on 15 March 2012 - 10:58

we've not got as far as that... my hubby was off to the typist center this morning, but i told him to hold on... she is saying that her husband has forthotten the marriage certificatem, so she wiull ask her mother to send it... she has asked us to hold on until saturday... i dont know what to do... i feel hurt & upset... & confused... i don't like to feel that someone is making a fool out of me... i've been so flexibale... i'm actually really pi!!ssed off... probably better to let her go then, not a good start to a 1 year contract really. If you do go ahead at this point then you need to be firm and fair and tell her exactly what the rules will be. Also explain to her (if you keep her) that once she is sponsored she must follow those rules for 1 year, and she cant just up and leave after a couple of months- chances are she doesn't know any of this. (my first maid told me 2 months in that she didn't really think she wanted to be a maid and that she was going to start looking for a job in a shop, this was 2 weeks after the sponsorship process was completed, turns out she really didn't have a clue about contracts etc even though I thought we had explained it all- very expensive for us.) <em>edited by Purple on 15/03/2012</em>

80

Posts

EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 15 March 2012 - 10:57

pooooooooooooooooooooooooo :(

230

Posts

EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 15 March 2012 - 10:55

we've not got as far as that... my hubby was off to the typist center this morning, but i told him to hold on... she is saying that her husband has forthotten the marriage certificatem, so she wiull ask her mother to send it... she has asked us to hold on until saturday... i dont know what to do... i feel hurt & upset... & confused... i don't like to feel that someone is making a fool out of me... i've been so flexibale... i'm actually really pi!!ssed off... just stop the VISA processing and look for someone else, its very much likely that that maid will give you problems in future

80

Posts

EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 15 March 2012 - 10:48

we've not got as far as that... my hubby was off to the typist center this morning, but i told him to hold on... she is saying that her husband has forthotten the marriage certificatem, so she wiull ask her mother to send it... she has asked us to hold on until saturday... i dont know what to do... i feel hurt & upset... & confused... i don't like to feel that someone is making a fool out of me... i've been so flexibale... i'm actually really pi!!ssed off...

2192

Posts

EW EXPERT

Latest post on 15 March 2012 - 10:26

i've asked her for the marriage certificate... she hasnt got it, and is saying maybe her husband has brought it with him so will check... but this morning she's turned around & said if we dont let her sleep out, she will look for a new employer!! we've already started the visa process so i am not happy :/ what do you think?? How far have you got with the visa process ? If its just the typing and you can stop the process i would and let her go. I would never dream of saying something like this to my employer. I would get rid now.

5452

Posts

EW MASTER

Latest post on 15 March 2012 - 10:09

i've asked her for the marriage certificate... she hasnt got it, and is saying maybe her husband has brought it with him so will check... but this morning she's turned around & said if we dont let her sleep out, she will look for a new employer!! we've already started the visa process so i am not happy :/ what do you think?? Now I'd be kind of wary of her. That is most likely not her DH.

80

Posts

EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 15 March 2012 - 10:04

i've asked her for the marriage certificate... she hasnt got it, and is saying maybe her husband has brought it with him so will check... but this morning she's turned around & said if we dont let her sleep out, she will look for a new employer!! we've already started the visa process so i am not happy :/ what do you think??

1029

Posts

EW OLDHAND

Latest post on 15 March 2012 - 08:51

Yes, my maid is allowed to sleep out. She is 40 years old and I am not her mother!

230

Posts

EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 15 March 2012 - 00:04

Are these grown women you are talking about or children? yes, if anything happened to these same grown women, the sponsor is the one who will be in trouble

446

Posts

EW EXPLORER

Latest post on 14 March 2012 - 22:55

Are these grown women you are talking about or children?

1247

Posts

EW OLDHAND

Latest post on 14 March 2012 - 22:37

Just be sure to check he really is the husband maryam, get a copy of their marriage certificate if need be. Better she is with a confirmed husband then a boyf (in the eyes of the law). But remember, as she just started, you are setting the standards now, if you say yes now then thats what she will expect later on.

80

Posts

EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 14 March 2012 - 21:13

ladies, I would like a bit of advice too... My maid joined us only last week - all is going well so far. She has asked me if she can go out overnight on a Thursday & then have her day off on Friday. I explained to her that I would be worried about her staying out overnight, although I have no objections to her leaving early on Friday morning. Her husband has this week arrived in Dubai too (from Phillipnes) and she will obviously want to be with him? Obviously I don't know her that well yet seeing as she's been for us for such a short length of time... What do you think? Am i being too anxious? Opinions appreciated! TIA :)

Al Quwatain51756

535

Posts

EW GURU

Latest post on 13 March 2012 - 07:55

Would you still allow maid to sleep out on her day off if you know there is a boyfriend involved? Need advice as I just found out that my maid came home the morning after despite our rule of no overnights. She is 33 so should I just let her be and not treat her like a teenage child? If she broke your rules, then you can do whatever you want now. At least the maid should know not to ask again in future and not to be surprised when you don't trust her. You can explain that you are only following the law and it is for her safety. By the way the law says give them a day off, it does not say OFF the premises, so she had better tread very carefully or you could confine her for the remainder of her contract.

19

Posts

EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 12 March 2012 - 20:31

Thanks ammalawad. Just had a talk with her and reinforced 9pm curfew and she will SMS if ever she is late. I guess we all need to be understanding that sometimes they'll be late. Relieved that it went well.

Amal.Awwad55146

4

Posts

EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 12 March 2012 - 18:20

I believe a 9esh curfew is good enough and not overnight sleeps. In all cases, if maids want to do anything bad, they'd find their way. We are not home all of the time.

19

Posts

EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 12 March 2012 - 18:14

Would you still allow maid to sleep out on her day off if you know there is a boyfriend involved? Need advice as I just found out that my maid came home the morning after despite our rule of no overnights. She is 33 so should I just let her be and not treat her like a teenage child?

5

Posts

EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 30 October 2011 - 14:00

Yes, she leave T night for her Anties maidshouse where she meet up with her sisters and friends, she comes back friday night (or sometime saturday morning, depending of our needs.) It takes her 1 and a half hour to get there..Her friends and sisters are welcome here as well, but they think it's to far...During the week she cooks and eat with her friends either here or there, no curfew..when she is off she is off. She is not married and no kids back home. We told her about the cons being pregnant out of married, no men allowed in the maids room, no kissing and holding hands with boyfriends in public, she is 32, pretty, sweet and single.. i'm her employer not her mother... I trust her, and if we need her she will stay. I meet the antie at the interview and she is taking good care of her and her sisters, i think it's important for all that she as well go and have fun..She comes back ready and happy to start another working week..if i were stock in my house or my hubby at his work forever, we will go insane....I understand you regards the others..make sure she have some good friends or family to hang out with, be with, to take care of each other..

50

Posts

EW NEWBIE

Latest post on 30 October 2011 - 13:55

I've had our maid/nanny for 2 years and she sleeps out every weekend (thu/fri/sat nights), I don't like having home help around during our family time. We've never had any problems

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